Title: Every Marriage is a Mirage (EMM)

Author: Arista Ramabra

Rating: T

Disclaimer: See chapter 1.

A/N: Enjoy!

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Recap of Chapter 3: Aaron confronts Lily about marrying James and then she goes to meet James where she learns of the agreement between father and son and looses her cool with James and ends up slapping him.

Chapter 4- Emotions

Lily let herself into her apartment, slowly closing her door, leaning against it. She shut her eyes, head throbbing. She'd apparated back home after leaving James in the café and after she got back she'd changed into slacks and a tee and gone out jogging. She'd always found running the best method to let out her anger and frustrations. After a thirty minute jog around the park she'd decided to return and grab a bite for dinner.

Lily forced herself to open her eyes and leave her position by the door. She went into her bed room, pulled out a towel from the dresser and stepped into the shower. She turned the hot water on full blast.

I hate men! She decided as she grabbed the soap and began to scrub viciously. Men are not worth your time Lily! she told herself. They'll only try to hurt you. But you can't let them!

She scrubbed even harder. One part of her mind said, Just like you told James. You'll only be hurt by men if you let them. Don't let James and Mr. Potter ruin you life, Lily! You know better than that.

She finally put the soap down and let the burning hot water run over her body. You told James, didn't you? You said you'd show him that you'll get back at him? Accept the marriage proposal just to lead him on. Get him to love you and then apply for a divorce. Then he'll know!

NO! another part of her mind screamed- the conscience. That's LOW! You can't do that to him! How'd you feel if some one did the same to you?

Better than being walked over by James! cried the other part in return.

Lily listened to the two parts of her mind argue back and forth, her head aching. She turned out the hot water tap completely and stood silent for several moments, listening to the dripping of the tap. Then suddenly she turned the cold water on full blast and though that left her shivering, it got rid of both her headache and the arguing voices in her head.

Turning the tap off, she grabbed the towel and wrapped it around her. She walked out of the bathroom, her feet plodding along the wooden floor. She went to her room and flipped on the light switch. She pulled out some clothes and was just about to get into them when the phone rang. She jumped, causing the clasp of her bracelet to get caught in the towel. She jiggled it this way and that but couldn't get it free. She panicked as the phone rang the third time. She abandoned the clasp and ran out into the living room to get the phone. She got to it just as the phone rang for the fourth time.

'Hello," she gasped into the telephone, trying to catch her breath, still struggling with the bracelet.

"Lily?" a small voice called back into the phone.

"Yes. Uh… Who's this?" she asked, unable to identify the voice, as she jiggled the bracelet even harder.

"Lily… It's Steve… Ev- we need you here…" said the voice, a hint of hysteria in it.

"Steve? What's wrong?" Steve, her brother, seldom phoned. She gave the bracelet one last desperate wiggle and finally it came free.

"We- Just come over please!" she begged.

Lily's mind began to race, wondering what exactly could be so important. "I- I'll be there shortly," she called into the receiver before hanging up. She rushed back into her bed room changing into the clothes as fast as she could. She grabbed her wand and apparated to her parent's house in Surrey.

-x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x- -x-

James stormed into his house, angry at himself for bringing up the subject, angry at Lily for slapping him, and angry at his father for picking such a violent woman. He kicked off his shoes, sinking in the couch, his arms crossed, sulking. How could she have slapped him- especially in front of all those people? I mean he was a Quidditch star! Women would kill just to spend a day with him, let alone a whole year! She should be excited to get such an opportunity. Not friggin' pissed! His cheek still hurt for heaven's sake from the slap that b- he stopped himself he said the word, knowing that his father would be upset if he said it.

He picked himself off the couch and went to the bath room where he flipped on the light switch and looked at himself in the glass, wondering if he was bad looking- that might be why she rejected him in the first place. His hair was as messy as ever, his hazel eyes bright with anger behind his wire rimmed glasses, his skin creamy and smooth. Except for the pinkish tinge on his left cheek. He rubbed at it vigorously, hoping it would go away but to no avail. The red mark stayed. He looked at himself for a few more minutes. He felt that he hadn't lost any of his looks. Maybe something's wrong with her eyesight or something.

James flipped off the switch and returned to his sulking position on the couch. He sank into its depths and soon he was not only in the depths of the seat but also into the depths of his mind, relenting to the recurring thought of the slap and the things that led to it. He was so absorbed in his thoughts that he didn't hear his father let himself in nor when he went upstairs and showered, or when he came back down and softly called his name.

"James!" Aaron cried, finally causing his son to look up at him.

"James, what on Earth is the matter with you? You've just been sitting there since I came back not even looking at me! What if it hadn't been me, huh? What if it'd been a burglar? Would you just have let him take everything he wanted, just sitting there?" Aaron scolded.

James just looked up and glared silently at his father.

"You don't know what I've been through!" James hissed before returning to his previous position.

"Well, James, I would only if you told me," Aaron said, as if explaining to a small child.

James looked up once more. "She slapped me," he said shortly. Aaron, in the process of picking up one of the shoes that James had kicked off stopped short. "What?" he asked slowly straightening up.

"She slapped me! She slapped me! She slapped me!" James suddenly cried, stressing different parts of the sentence each time.

"Who? Lily?" Aaron asked, confused, but James seemed not to hear.

"Do you know how many people would kill to spend a day with me!" he continued, addressing his father. But before Aaron could answer he hurried on. "And I offer her a year. A whole year, sacrificing my freedom and what does she do? Slap me! ME! The infamous Marauder and famous Quidditch player! Can you believe her?" he asked Aaron, this time waiting for an answer.

"Well… actually I can. What did you say to her James?"

"Nothing!"

"Yes and she slapped you for no reason," said Aaron sarcastically.

"YES! That's what I'm trying to say!" James yelled.

"James," Aaron said in a threatening tone.

"I said NOTHING!" Aaron glared at his son. James faltered.

"James, What- Did- You- Say!" The previous night where James had had his father ready to beg on his knees was forgotten; now, Aaron surely had his son under his control. James looked down.

"Well… stuff about..." And just his luck, there was a knock on the door and with a quick, "I'll get it!" James was out of his father's reach. Aaron sighed and took up the seat and position his son had been in just a few minutes previously.

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Lily rang the doorbell of her house, tapping her foot impatiently. She heard some yelling and a small high pitched shriek before the door opened to reveal her younger brother, an apologetic smile on him face. That was a smile that the entire family had practiced- they were going to need it whenever their oldest sister/daughter (depending on the family member it was that opened the door) was around. But on seeing Lily, his smile turned to one of sadness.

"I see 'Tunia is in the house? What happened this time?" Lily asked him wryly.

Steve's sad smile turned into a happy grin. "Her boyfriend's sister said that she was too bony," he said, almost happily, beckoning fro Lily to follow him inside. Lily laughed. And then she sobered up. "Steve… what happened? You called and-"

"Shh!" he hissed, looking around the living room, making sure that no one was around. "Not now!" Lily was taken aback, but deciding that Steve knew what had happened and was telling her to stay silent for a reason, she obliged. He stopped outside the kitchen and tiptoed across the doorway. When he reached the other side he motioned for Lily to follow. She copied his actions and silently crossed the kitchen. Steve led her up silently to the den on the second floor. It was then that he talked.

"Lily? Eve… she is in a bit of trouble." Steve looked down.

"What happened?" Lily asked, alarmed.

"Well… you know that boyfriend of hers?" Steve asked, looking up.

"Yes…" Lily answered, a bit hesitantly. Steve noticed it and said, "The one we know exists but we don't know anything about?" Lily nodded.

"Well, apparently he's gotten her… pregnant." Steve cast his eyes downward again. Lily was silent; her eyes were wide with shock, and small beads of perspiration formed on her forehead. It was always up to her to solve all the problems. Always! Petunia was the oldest, sure, but she was as mature as a small child. She had no sense of responsibility and she was very nitpicky about her decisions. Steve took charge whenever Lily wasn't there. That was all that he could do. And Evelyn was the baby of the family- she wasn't expected to handle anything. Not that she couldn't but Lily's parents had always been that way, not letting her carry a heavy load on herself. And while Lily's mother and father had the house under control most of the time, they were getting old and some one had to take charge. So of course all responsibility fell on the second oldest child, Lily.

She sighed, wiping her forehead. She sank into the nearest chair. "Why?" was all she was able to get out for fatigue and an alarmingly large number of emotions overwhelmed her.

Steve sighed. "We don't know… but she… she claims that he didn't… rape her." Steve hung his head, once more.

Lily pulled herself up and forcing herself to think about her family instead of herself she walked to Steve and pulled him into a tight hug. "It'll be ok, Steve." And after letting go she asked him what had been bothering her for the past few minutes.

"Steve… what did mum and dad say?"

Steve looked Lily straight in her eyes and she saw the unshed tears he had for his younger sister. Lily closed her eyes and tried to hold back the tears threatening to fall down her cheeks. She opened them slowly to find Steve still staring at her.

"Mum is in shock. She's… unconscious."

Lily sat down again, her head in her hands, starting to sob silently. But Steve, however, had turned the other way and not noticing Lily, continued to speak.

"She always thought of Evelyn as the baby of the family. She thought that she was so good and so pure. She didn't expect her to go this far… no never in her wildest dreams. Perhaps kissing would have been a hesitant OK for Evelyn to have had. And when she heard that Eve was pregnant she just lost control, I suppose. She fainted, you know, and I cried at 'Tunia to call Mrs. Brink, you know the new neighbor, the doctor? And she said that Mum had gone into shock. She put her to bed. And then Dad also lost control, snapping at anyone that made any noise. That's why I made you tiptoe across the kitchen. And Evelyn and Petunia-" Steve turned around, and stopped talking abruptly as he saw Lily sobbing into her hands softly.

"Lily?" he called gently. "Oh My- Lily, I'm so sorry. I didn't think- I'm so sorry. Here, lemme get you-" He grabbed a box of tissues and offered it to Lily. She slowly lifted up her head and took a single tissue and blew her nose. Then she took another and wiped her eyes and cheeks.

"I'm so sorry!" she whispered. "Come on, Lets go talk to Dad and Eve and, I have to see mum-"

"No, Lily. You're not going anywhere. You need to rest. Stay over here tonight. Call off work tomorrow. We'll talk to mum and dad in the morning."

Lily shook her head sadly. "I have to go to work tomorrow. But I'll stay over tonight." Steve led her to Evelyn's room where there was an extra bed and no sooner had Lily laid down that sleep over came her.

Steve turned off the light and exited, closing the door behind him, softly.