Disclaimer: I don't own CCS or the song Unfaithful by Rihanna.
This is my second ET fic and I hope that all the musically talented people don't scream at me for any of the simple or obvious mistakes I have made. I am incredibly slow at music.
This fic is in honor of my new friend who I just met a few days ago through I know that he is busy with college and stuff and so I decided to write this fic starring one of his fav couples, Eriol and Tomoyo, seeing as I have tons of free time (school holidays rule! D) Enjoy!
Tomoyo sighed unhappily. Her crush, her close friend and her fellow matchmaker, was struggling with his relationship. Hiiragizawa Eriol was having trouble with his long-term girlfriend Mizuki Kaho. She was in love with another guy and was cheating on Eriol behind his back. But he knew. He knew and everytime she left he died on the inside a little more.
Tomoyo was struggling not to break down and tell him to dump Kaho or to go and slap Kaho for being such an unfeeling heart-breaker. Tomoyo was unsure what to do but knew she had to do something. She felt like she was dying herself, everytime she saw Eriol so upset. She had to help him! But what could she do? Instead of doing anything helpful she buried herself in her music. She needed a way to release the feelings that she bottled up everyday and singing her feelings was the most effective way.
She started on some throat warm-ups, so that she wouldn't damage her throat or voice in anyway. It was just like what an athlete does before competing; a few stretches and warm-ups so that they wouldn't hurt themselves. A gentle knock on the door to her private music room interrupted her near the end of her warm-ups. The doorknob twisted and the door creaked as it opened. Kaho was standing there.
Fury raced through Tomoyo's veins and only years of bottling up and hiding her emotions managed to conceal her anger. A gentle, confused and almost naïve mask covered Tomoyo's rage. "Kaho? What are you doing here?"
Kaho looked hesitant and stuttered slightly. "I-I-I was wondering if you could help me. Could you sing this song?" She handed Tomoyo a sheet of paper with both the lyrics and musical structure (Sneezii: is this the correct term?) on it.
'Oh she wants me to help her and sing her a stupid song, when she should be trying to help Eriol!' Tomoyo thought furiously. All the same, she politely accepted and started to sing. But she was unsure how to start. That was when the magic in her music room burst into life.
Sakura had enchanted it so that if Tomoyo started a song but there was no one to play the instrumental music in the background, the instruments would start to play by themselves. A gentle instrumental introduction was played by the piano, instantly bringing images of Eriol to her mind. After all he always was the pianist in her performances. Tomoyo dismissed those thoughts and instantly found her queue and started to sing.
" Story of my life
Searching for the right
But it keeps avoiding me
Sorrow in my soul
Cause it seems that wrong
Really loves my company
He's more than a man
And this is more than love
The reason that the sky is blue
The clouds are rolling in
Because I'm gone again
And to him I just can't be true "
More memories and thoughts of Eriol flowed into her mind. Tomoyo had no idea why, but this song reminded her so much of him.
" And I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dyin'
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be... a murderer "
Tomoyo's gaze started to blur as tears formed in her eyes. She felt a pang in her heart as this song related so much with Eriol and Kaho's relationship. The small instrumental interlude after the chorus had ended and Tomoyo launched back into the song.
" I feel it in the air
As I'm doin' my hair
Preparing for another day
A kiss upon my cheek
As he reluctantly
Asks if I'm gonna be out late
I say I won't be long
Just hangin' with the girls
A lie I didn't have to tell
Because we both know
Where I'm about to go
And we know it very well
Cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I'm happy with some other guy
I can see him dyin'
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be... a murderer "
Tomoyo blinked back tears furiously. She was horrified. 'Is Eriol going through this? Are you just trying to hurt me? Hurt him? Why? Why? WHY?'
" Our love... his trust
I might as well take a gun
And put it to his head
Get it over with
I don't wanna do this... anymore
Oooohhh... anymore
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
And everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
And I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be... a murderer
...a murderer " The music slowly faded out, leaving Tomoyo breathless.
Tomoyo stared at Kaho questioningly. Tomoyo was very confused. 'Why did you pick a song like this? Why are you tormenting me? I know that I haven't done anything to help him! What am I supposed to do!' Tomoyo wailed inwardly.
Kaho had been watching Tomoyo's face intently while she sung. Although the expressions had died away instantly after the song ended, she knew that Tomoyo had felt something. She knew that Tomoyo understood she just didn't want to admit it. Kaho leaned forward and clasped Tomoyo's hands in her own. Desperation was clouding her entire face, tears shining in her eyes. "I wrote that myself. Please Tomoyo, help me!" She cried, hinting desperately.
Tomoyo instantly understood. She needed help with Eriol. "Alright Kaho, I'll try."
"Thank you! Thank you sooooo much!" Kaho cried, gratitude encompassing her perfect face.
"Don't worry. I don't want Eriol to get hurt anymore, either." Tomoyo replied, gently.
Kaho seemed a bit confused and surprised at Tomoyo's tone. The gentleness and caring compassion wasn't for her. She frowned for a moment before realization hit her. Her eyes widened shocked. "You—? You lo—!"
Blood rushed to Tomoyo's cheeks and she swiftly cut through Kaho's sentence. "I'm sorry to interrupt you, but I have to go and see Eriol. Is there anything else you need?"
Kaho smiled softly. "Yeah I do. I knew you were the right person to go to for help and that I'm sure Eriol will open his eyes and see you." With that she walked out gracefully leaving behind an embarrassed, red-faced Daidouji Tomoyo.
Tomoyo stayed in her music room, rooted to the floor. She cleared her thoughts, trying to find an inner calm and remove the blush that stained her porcelain cheeks. She waited a few more minutes, until she was sure that Kaho was gone before leaving her sanctuary. She glided down the stairs, perfectly poised, gracefully and elegant, just like a famous heiress should.
"Sayuri!" Tomoyo called out.
Instantly, her maid Ikumi Sayuri was in front of her bowing. "Tomoyo-sama."
"I'm going out, so tell Misha that I won't be here for lunch and hat she doesn't have to cook anything for me. If Okaa-san comes back, tell her that I probably won't be back for while. Okay?"
"Yes Tomoyo-sama. Right away." Sayuri replied obediently.
"Ittekimas" Tomoyo said walking towards the door. (Sneezii: That's a jap term to say goodbye. It is only used by someone who is leaving their house.)
"Itterashai!" Tomoyo's maid replied. (Sneezii: that's the word used by the person who is staying inside the house as goodbye.)
Tomoyo closed the door behind her and walked through the lush green grass that added an elegant classy effect to the Daidouji mansion. The guards opened the gate for her and bid her a good trip.
Tomoyo walked down the street, shivering slightly at the cold winter breeze. She pulled her jacket closer, tightly wrapping it around her. Tomoyo had stopped focusing on everything around her and withdrawn into her mind. She was worried about Eriol and how he was coping with Kaho cheating on him. She hoped that Kaho's song wasn't true and that he wasn't that depressed. Hew worry had clouded over all her other thoughts and closed off all her senses.
She was only brought back to reality when her feet stopped moving. She refocused her gaze and found Hiiragizawa Eriol's house right in front of her. She smiled softly at the thought that even without her focusing she could walk all the way to Eriol's house without noticing.
She walked up to the door and knocked. She waited before her worry resurfaced. 'What if he committed suicide?' Without hesitating he grabbed her copy of his house key and opened the door. She rushed in panicking, her eyes scanning the room until she noticed a lone figure sitting dismally at the piano. Tomoyo could almost hear her heart break at the sight.
She quietly approached him and sat down next to him. She waited for him to notice her presence. But he didn't. She stared at him intently and noticed something that shook her to the bone. A lone tear rolled down his pale cheek, he looked gaunt and almost like a ghost. His eyes were filled with sorrow and had glazed over.
Tomoyo couldn't take it. She through her arms around him and held him tightly, fighting back her own tears. "Oh Eriol," she whispered "Don't do this. Don't lose yourself. Please."
She felt Eriol stiffen, finally realizing her presence. "Tomo—?"
"I know that it hurts. It hurts so much that you feel as though constantly and repeatedly stabbing you whenever they're together. You feel as though you did something wrong, something that drove them away and can't take back. You feel like your entire world has been stolen from you, leaving you alone and afraid. And it feels as though nothing will ever take away that pain and loneliness." Tears flowed down my cheeks at the memories of when I went through the same thing. "I know. I went through the same thing when Sakura fell in love with Syaoran. I felt like I had nothing to live for, but had to hide it so that she wouldn't notice. I felt like giving up and surrendering to the pain and the darkness. But you shouldn't. You can't give up, because there are still people out there who care. People like me."
Eriol listen carefully, unable to respond. Tomoyo held him closer. "I can understand if you don't want to talk about it. Just remember that if ever you need someone to talk to or even just a shoulder to cry on, I'll be there for you. I know that it hurts but it's almost impossible to bear when you're alone. I know because I had no one to lean on. I don't want you to go through that. If you do need to talk, I will understand."
With that, Tomoyo let go of Eriol and stood up, turning to leave. The comforting warmth that engulfed Eriol had disappeared, leaving him feeling lonelier than ever before. He grabbed Tomoyo's wrist. "Please don't leave me..." He whispered desperately.
Tomoyo froze, her eyes wide. She trembled and unwanted memories flowed back into her mind.
Flashback
"Oh Tomoyo-chan! I'm so excited! It's Syaoran-kun and my first date! I can't believe it! Thank you soooo much Tomoyo-chan! I'd be such a horrible mess without you!" Sakura cried happily.
Tomoyo forced a smile as she continued to add small amounts of make up on Sakura's face to compliment her natural beauty. "Well obviously! I couldn't let my kawaii little Sakura-chan go on her first date without helping her!" Tomoyo squealed with fake joy. "And you have to wear my designs! It makes me so happy to see you in my creations!"
Sakura hugged her tightly. "Thank you so much Tomoyo-chan! I don't what I'd do without you as my best-friend!"
A gentle knock on the door interrupted them and Tomoyo's maid Sayuri entered. "Tomoyo-sama, I'm sorry to disturb you but Sakura-san's boyfriend is outside waiting for her."
Sakura's face glowed with delight. "Omigod! He's here!" She leapt out the door ecstatically, forgetting entirely about Tomoyo.
Tears formed in Tomoyo's eyes. "Please don't go..." She whispered desperately at Sakura's back as Sakura skipped down the stairs, eager to see her boyfriend. Tears flowed down her porcelain cheeks and she broke down and cried her heart out.
End Flashback
Tomoyo struggled to fight down her tears as she raced back into Eriol's arms, yearning for warmth and comfort. "As long you want me to stay, I'll be here."
"I love her. I lover Kaho but she loves someone else. I know she loves him, she's with him everyday. But I don't know what to do. I love her and I don't want her to leave." Eriol whispered brokenly.
Tomoyo knew what he should do. She knew that he had to give her up and set Kaho free but she had no idea how to tell him. "Eriol pretend that you're dating someone else—"
"WHAT?" Eriol demanded roughly.
"Listen to me Eriol. Just pretend that you're dating someone else, someone like Sakura. You have a wonderful relationship with her but there's just something missing. You find someone else who you love, more than Sakura, but you don't want to hurt her. After all Sakura is so kind and innocent and delicate. You don't want to hurt her but you want to follow your heart all the same. What do you do?" Tomoyo asked soothingly.
Eriol frowned, confused and not realizing the connection to his and Kaho's relationship before answering. "Well I guess I would wait... I wouldn't want to hurt her so I'd wait for her to realize that she loved someone else, or slowly distance myself from her until she decided that things weren't working out..."
"Exactly. That's how Kaho is feeling. She loves you and cares about you, but she found someone who she loves more. She doesn't want to hurt you but she wants to be with him. She tried to give you little hints but you were too blissful and content just being with her that you never noticed. That's why she had to go and cheat on you, making sure that you knew what she was doing. And yet even though you know, you still haven't let her go. Eriol she wants to be free."
"But I love her! I-I-I don't want her to be with someone else! I want her to be with me!" he cried out.
"Eriol you have to set her free. You have to let her make her own decision. You have to let go. If she comes back to you then she's yours and always will be. If she doesn't then you have to let her go and be content knowing that she's happy. If you truly do love her then you should want her to be happy." Tomoyo said softly, looking straight into his eyes, trying to convince him.
"I—" He looked away. "I see... I'll try..."
Tomoyo smiled softly and hugged him before letting go. "Remember that I'm here for you, and if you need me I'll be there." She said before leaving.
Tomoyo walked home slowly, trying to figure out why memories of Sakura and Syaoran still hurt her so much. After all she was in love with Eriol now. 'Maybe it's because Eriol is in the same position that I was in years ago and it hurts to think that he feels the same pain that I did...' That was when the rain started to fall, drenching Tomoyo. The rain merged with her tears until not even Tomoyo herself could tell what was what.
The moment Tomoyo got home, she ran to her room to change into something warm and in particular, something dry. Her hair had started to dry and she sat down on the cushioned ledge that was next to the window. She stared at the sky, listening to the sounds of the rain falling on the ground outside, thinking for hours. Until she was interrupted by her door bursting open revealing a rain-soaked Hiiragizawa Eriol. Eriol threw himself into Tomoyo's arms, seeking warmth and comfort, while the maid that had escorted him to Tomoyo's room closed the door leaving them with some privacy.
"I-I did it. I broke up with Kaho. And you were right. She looked so relieved when I told her that. She loves him." Eriol choked out, holding onto Tomoyo like she was his lifeline.
"Oh." Was all she uttered softly, before holding me tight.
"What am I supposed to do now? It's obvious that she loves him and now I don't know what to do. I just feel like—like—" Eriol broke off unable to continue.
Tomoyo knew how he was feeling. "Don't worry Eriol, that's natural. You feel lost, like you have no point in living anymore. What you have to find someone who you love more. Someone who loves you back."
Eriol looked up curiously. Tomoyo sounded like she had so much personal experience but he knew that she didn't have a boyfriend. "How do you know? Do you love someone?"
Tomoyo smiled sadly. "I know because once I got over Sakura-chan I fell in love with someone else. This time a guy. But he was in love with someone else and had a long-term relationship with her. He broke up with her recently, though. Right now it hurts me to see him sad and hurt but I can't do much because he's trying to get over her."
Eriol looked at her, surprised. "The why are you here? With me? Why aren't you with him? Trying to win him over. Trying to help him." He demanded.
"Because you're one of my best friends and I care about you. Besides, I don't want to take advantage of him, when he's in a vulnerable state. As long as he's happy I will be too." Tomoyo replied simply.
Eriol was touched by that. She was in love with someone but had thought of him first. "Thanks Tomoyo."
"Don't worry Eriol-kun. Anyway I'm sure that you'll find someone who loves you as much as you love them. After all you are a charming, sweet guy, with a great sense of humour and I'm sure that there will be big crowd of girls eager to be with you once they find out that you're single." Tomoyo said comfortingly.
Eriol observed the girl in his arms, smiling softly and encouragingly at him. From her perfect porcelain skin, to her glowing amethyst eyes, to her soft smoky-gray tresses of silky hair, to her soft melodious voice, to her innocent caring kindness and her golden heart, he knew that she was perfect. She made him feel a strong overwhelming warmth and had always been there for him. She was special and had an effect over him that no one else did. He realised something that he had never paid attention to before, something that he had always dismissed.
He grinned his traditional mysterious and almost evil Cheshire cat grin and whispered to her, "I think I already have." Before she could say anything he captured her lips with his and held her tightly.
Sneezii: Yay! My second ET fic finished! Did you guys like the ending? Don't forget to review and tell me your thoughts! D
—Sneezii