The two things happened simultaneously.
Mamoru fainted, and Usagi's communicator fizzled to life. She had no sooner leapt to her fallen comrade when Ami's voice resounded,
"I'm picking up residual signs of Dark Kingdom energy in Roppongi Hills, looks like a high-rise construction site..." There was a breathless quality to her exclamation, as if she were on the run, confirmed seconds later with, "I'm on my way to check it out now! Sending coordinates!"
"Ten-four!" Makoto joined, closely followed by Rei's,
"I'm not far! Be there shortly!"
Usagi wasn't one to swear very often, but she let fly a rather colorful expletive that would have earned her the hard end of a pan were she in her mother's company. So the girls finally caught wind of the battle and were coming... fast. The fifteen year old felt a new kind of fear course through her chest. Perfect freaking timing, guys. She had absolutely no way to explain what Tuxedo Kamen was doing here, crumpled at her feet, nor was she even confident that they might not try something with him. Images of Mamoru tied to a post in the middle of the shrine would normally have made her laugh, but not in this situation. He was their 'enemy', and she either looked suicidal or like an accomplice, crouched over the man begging for him to wake up. Usagi cringed before administering a decidedly rough shake. He had said he'd done it; he'd healed himself at long last... she wished she could stop and just be proud, but right now she could only hope she wasn't about to re-injure him.
"Mamo-chan... Mamo-chan!" Her urgency must have penetrated the depths of his unconsciousness, because Mamoru began showing signs of stirring. His eyes flittered behind their lids. "Mamo-chan, listen to me. You have to wake up!"
Mamoru moaned softly. Usagi jostled him again, only slightly more gently this time.
"That's right... wake up... please, hurry, Mamo-chan!"
"U... sa..."
His eyes opened blearily, and though he tried to look at her, the effort seemed too much for his befuddled brain. There was next to no focus in his gaze.
"Can you get up?" Usagi pressed desperately, trying to initiate the act with a fruitless tug to his heavy shoulders. He was dead weight. "We need to get you up and away from here. My friends are on their way now. Right now."
"Up?" Mamoru repeated, as if confused by the word.
"Yes, up," Usagi nodded, pulling at him again. To his credit, Mamoru seemed to realize what her intentions were, because with supremely labored breaths he managed to stand with her help. But there was definitely something not right with him, not right at all. Usagi watched nervously as he chuckled in a low, lackadaisical singsong,
"Up up and awaaay."
"M-Mamo-chan?"
He went from smiling vapidly to a deep, bothered frown. Usagi felt like she was getting a case of mental whiplash, trying to comprehend which version of Mamoru she would encounter next. She hardly knew what to think, still very aware of the clock ticking down, but also now the proverbial slave to his whims. She was stuck in place, supporting the majority of his weight as he leaned feebly against her.
"Feel... sick. I... drunk?"
"No. You used up all your energy healing yourself."
"Mm... Am I... magician?" Mamoru's eyes went all squinty behind his mask, as if he were pondering some great mystery of his life. "Doctor... magician mask." He giggled again. "Tuxedo drunk."
Usagi gaped.
"Oh god. You're delirious."
Mamoru's head bobbled unsteadily upon his shoulders as he looked down at her, honing in on Usagi's horrified expression. A gloved finger came up to poke at her face.
"Don'."
"Don't what?" she asked, weakly.
"Drink... it. D'rk Kin'dom juice. V'ry bad."
"Oh?" Usagi murmured, starting to struggle under the strain of basically being the only thing keeping him upright. He hummed his concurrence, eyes slipping closed once again.
"I drank it f'r you."
"That was very nice of you," Usagi gasped, then, "Mamo-chan? Can we... we need to get moving again, alright? We don't have much time. Follow my lead. That's right... walk..." He copied her motions, one foot, next foot. It eased the burden just enough for her to catch her breath. If only her transformation lent her super strength! "Let's hide you somewhere, alright?"
"Hide'n'seek," Mamoru warbled, sounding much younger than his eighteen years. Usagi couldn't help but smile.
"Yes, you'll hide and I'll find you, alright? Just after I see to the Senshi."
She found a protected nook behind one of the construction vehicles, out of sight of the large clearing where the battle just took place, and where Yumemi still lay. She eased Mamoru down in the shadow of one of its wheels, and though she tried as carefully as she could, it was still a bumpy landing. He expressed his discomfort with a beleaguered grunt.
"Sorry... so sorry... are you alright?"
Mamoru didn't answer, but he was still so very out of it, and Usagi wasn't even sure he was listening to her anymore. His eyes were starting to glaze back over and he propped his head up against the cool rubber of the tire, inadvertently sending his top hat askew. It appeared the short journey over had completely done him in. Usagi reached out to tenderly fix his hat when she heard the telltale sound of crunching rock underfoot.
"Rest a bit, okay? And stay here. I'll be back for you soon, I promise," she whispered hurriedly, before getting up to waylay her incoming friends. The hand that shot out and grabbed her wrist surprised her.
There was a strange look on Mamoru's face, a vulnerability in his eyes, which Usagi strove to decipher with her own searching gaze. She hadn't ever really seen it on him before.
"Coming... back?" he slurred, a hungry desperation coming through despite the weakness of his query.
That's when she realized, she was finally witnessing a Mamoru with his guard completely down - no walls, no pretenses, no strong stoic front. He was usually very good at hiding it, but deep down, Mamoru was still that lost and lonely boy from the orphanage. A boy who somewhere along the way, stopped hoping anyone would ever come for him and resigned himself to a fate of loveless solitude and low expectation. Of course he wouldn't just blindly believe she was going to return for him. Not in this tired and insecure state.
It reminded her of another time and another place, where she herself was stripped of all defenses and only had but one beacon in her sea of night, one savior to cling to.
"Do you trust me?" she asked, visions of the funhouse from hell passing through her mind.
A fraction of the fog shifted in Mamoru's eyes, as somewhere deep within a connection was made, a memory triggered. Usagi wondered if he too realized the role reversal; the quiet importance of this moment.
He could have just said yes, but somehow the answer he did give was even more meaningful.
"Always," he murmured, the firm edge belying the sleepy tone. Usagi's throat was tight with unspoken emotion so she settled for simply taking his hand and squeezing it, nodding. Then came the hardest part - disentangling herself and turning away, hoping to God he remained there and safe in her absence.
She darted back out into the destroyed clearing just in time to witness Luna and her three Senshi careening off the street, in full garb, ready to take on a threat that no longer was. In the time it took for them to assess the scene and skitter to a confused halt, Usagi had already hatched up a foolproof excuse for the inevitable questions to follow.
She covertly summoned her communicator.
"Usagi-chan!? What on earth..."
Usagi graced Luna's exclamation with a smile that bordered on an apologetic grimace, holding up her communicator like the scapegoat it was. It should disturb her how easily the lie flowed off her lips, but all she could think about was getting them to leave so she could return to the man hidden mere feet away.
"I'm sorry - I tried to call but they blasted my communicator away. I just got it back," she sidestepped smoothly, even throwing in a frustrated sigh for affect. "It was Zoisite. He wanted her crystal." The blonde heroine brought Yumemi to their attention with a gesture, just now realizing that they hadn't played catch up since the gala and would have no idea her identity as the famous artist. She quickly filled them in with only the relevant details, a watered-down version of the night and what led to this skirmish, and watched as their slacked jaws grew bigger and bigger.
If only they could know the whole of it.
The parts that truly mattered.
How Mamoru had treated her like a princess last night. How scared he had sounded when he thought Yumemi kidnapped her. How they almost, maybe, would have kissed. How it had stirred up a tumult of feelings previously dormant within her chest, but now they were free and running rampant throughout her system, until she could think of nothing but him and his broody laugh and the way he offered her both fierce protection and aching kindness. A place to heal, a place to grow. Letting her in like he had no one else. How they had worked together for so long now, they were even starting to fight like a symbiotic unit. Two pieces that fit together like...
Like they were meant to be.
She wanted so, so very much to tell them.
And yet...
And yet...
There was another part of her that liked it all being their little secret; this feeling of them against the world. That wanted it to stay a bubble no one else was allowed to encroach upon. The garden, the apartment. These were safe places now. And selfishly...
She did not want to share.
She wanted him all hers, if only for a tiny bit longer, and the unchecked admission made her blush.
"Wait wait wait. Usagi. Are you saying you - singlehandedly - fought off Zoisite and youma Yumemi?" Mars interrupted Usagi's meandering thoughts, with an inflection full of such amazement and doubt that Usagi bristled with offense.
"Yes," she said, shooing away the nag in her conscience that it wasn't actually all her. But she still accomplished it without their assistance, and did a damn good job too, if she did say so herself!
"What happened to the crystal?" Mercury inserted gingerly, shades of sympathy lining the query as if she had already forecasted the letdown. Usagi felt a glib satisfaction in proving them wrong and herself capable yet again. She produced the green crystal with a smirk of triumph.
"Trapped him with the tiara and snatched it right out of his hands. Ol' Zoisite never saw it coming!"
"Well I'll be. Usagi-chan won us the last Rainbow Crystal!" Luna said, sounding as flabbergasted as the rest of the girls looked. Jupiter even came up and clapped Usagi so hard on the back she had to dig in her heels to steady herself. The thunder warrior had a grin that stretched from ear to ear as she declared,
"That's one less for the enemy! Man, it sure is good to have you back, Sailor Moon!"
A rowdy chorus of laughter and congratulations ensued, Sailor Mars pointing out how nice it was not to have to waste their energy trying to operate Usagi's wand anymore. That maybe, just maybe, they finally even had a chance - however slim and distant - of defeating the Dark Kingdom one day. It was a joyous moment, a sense of unification that hadn't been felt since before Usagi's accident. But for the aforementioned blonde, it was a celebration darkened deep down by the knowledge that she still wasn't being entirely honest with them. That her success was aided by a man she knew they had categorically grouped under Jupiter's "enemy" comment, vilifying him without even truly knowing him.
A man who still desperately needed her, Usagi reminded herself.
"Um - I should probably get Yumemi-san back home," the Moon Senshi said, mind concocting up a foolproof scenario wherein she ditched the girls to see to her new friend, only to return as soon as Yumemi was settled. Presumably they would clear out as soon as she did, now that the threat was neutralized. Then she could finally tend to Mamoru and find out a way to get him home. A sly glance towards the construction vehicles confirmed he was, at least, still invisible to the others.
Her perfect plan hit an unexpected snag when Sailor Jupiter chuckled ruefully. "You gonna steal one of those cranes to carry her home? Uh uh. You've done enough, let me help now." The brawny brunette reached down and in one fell swoop, had Yumemi up and over her shoulder. She only grunted briefly as she situated the unconscious artist more comfortably, then turned back to Usagi. "You lead and I'll follow."
Usagi quickly schooled her expression of any perturbation that may have crept there, because actually, Jupiter had a point. She hadn't exactly figured the transportation of Yumemi into her plan, just as she really had no idea how she was going to drag Mamoru all the way to Azabu. A bridge she would cross once she got there, she supposed. She swept her eyes over the rest of the Senshi, wondering how best to gently dismiss them without making it seem suspicious.
Luckily, Sailor Mercury did it for her, reverting back to Ami with a flurrying of blue light and shimmery bubbles. She primly patted out the creases in her red-and-black checkered skirt.
"School night tonight and nothing more to do here, so I better get going," the pedantic intoned. "Oh, Usagi-chan - do you want me to take the crystal and keep it with the other one?"
Usagi startled. "Oh. Um. That's okay, I can keep it safe."
If Ami found her refusal peculiar, she didn't broadcast it. Usagi bit her lip. There was that wave of guilt again, a relentless pummel against her insides that she tried to push back with her earnest convictions. She knew she was doing the right thing, helping Mamoru. It just felt like she was on the correct path... there was no other way to describe it. She had nothing but faith to go off of, no tangible proof but her gut intuition. If he was the enemy then maybe she was too, because if her every intention was to take that newly acquired Rainbow Crystal and pool it with his, she was most definitely his accomplice.
"Luna, I'll meet you later?"
"Better hurry or your mama will have your head," Luna warned, a nod to the evening sky, but her small feline face softened nonetheless. "Wonderful job today, Usagi-chan. I'm so proud."
Usagi self-consciously shrugged off the compliment. "Just doing my job," she murmured, before bidding farewell. But not without a last surreptitious glance at a certain tire. She walked Jupiter back to Yumemi's with a heart that felt strangely off-kilter from the rest of her movements. Her stride was slow and measured yet her heart was beating its own nervous staccato, so loudly the teen was amazed her companion didn't hear it. Every nerve in her body was begging to run, to ditch Yumemi and Sailor Jupiter as quickly as possible so that she could get back to Mamoru. Was he still awake, teetering upon the thin line between incoherence and reality? Or had he slipped back into whatever coma the golden healing energy first sucked him into?
Jupiter wasn't dumb. She could sense Usagi's thoughts were elsewhere, and it shouldn't have surprised Usagi that her friend reached out. Makoto was always the nurturing maternal figure in their group. But it did, and she startled as the solicitous hand perched upon her shoulder.
"Usagi-chan, you okay? You're like, miles away."
"Huh? What? Uh, no, I'm fine," Usagi answered, casually waving her off. "Just hungry and distracted, I suppose."
That trick usually worked - this was her after all, of the infamous bottomless pit - but Jupiter was more persistent than usual. "Seems like there's something on your mind."
Usagi furrowed her brow.
"Or someone," Jupiter amended, too cavalierly. Usagi nearly tripped over a crack in the sidewalk.
"Mako-chan, stop being weird," she huffed, masking her flush with an increase in speed that took her a couple paces ahead of the brunette. "I think you're just projecting. I don't have a Senpai. Oh, here we are."
They stopped in front of a lovely cottage off the main road that screamed money solely for the reason that it had a small plot of land - bursting with flower beds - in this opulent city setting. Or... it would have been lovely, if it weren't for the large, beautiful bay window that had been viciously shattered. Shards of glass littered the grass outside and continued into the living room slash art studio as Moon and Jupiter made their way in.
Usagi cringed. "Poor Yumemi-san. What a mess."
Luckily the window appeared to be the only damage inflicted. Everything else seemed demonstrably intact. They swept some stray glass off the couch before carefully depositing Yumemi onto it. The petite, mousy-faced woman didn't even twitch, still firmly out cold. Jupiter inclined her head at Usagi.
"De-transform, yeah?"
That reminded Usagi of something. She nibbled on a nail through the fabric of her glove, the peek at Makoto out of the corner of her eye decidedly sheepish. "So... um... there might be a... slight chance she saw me transform into Sailor Moon."
"Slight?" Jupiter repeated, an indecipherable sharpness to her tone. Usagi assumed it was primarily concern, but she'd had enough scoldings from Rei to know when someone was disappointed with her. She got it. They were always only one botched reveal away from having their true identities splashed across every ravenous tabloid out there. But Jupiter didn't know Yumemi, and Usagi was... probably about ninety percent certain her new friend wasn't the type.
Or so she really really hoped.
"Usagi-chan. How slight is slight?" Jupiter accosted her. Mercifully more gently than Rei would've, at very least.
"Well, I didn't really have a choice," Usagi staunchly defended herself. "Zoisite caught up to us, and without becoming Sailor Moon I would've been a sitting duck. I had to try to protect us... even though in the end, he got her anyway," she concluded grudgingly.
Jupiter stood down at that, total understanding washing over her features as Usagi explained the gravity of the situation to her. She sighed and scratched at her ponytail. "What's done is done, I guess. We'll deal with it when she wakes up. Speaking of..."
The thunder warrior became plain old Makoto and Usagi followed suit, the darkness a cloak over her eyes once more. Always so bittersweet, the return. Makoto patted her like she could read her mind. Usagi smiled wanly back. Then she set to rousing the artist.
"Yumemi-san... Yumemi-san!" she called, shaking the woman's shoulders and wondering in a rush of deja vu just how many times she would have to wake an unconscious person today. Bleary mumbling alerted her to the fact that Yumemi was stirring. "Yumemi-san, can you hear me? It's Usagi."
"Usa-chan?" Yumemi's voice was all kinds of groggy and confused. "What... what happened? I had... a strange dream..."
Ah, now this was fortuitous. Usagi spied her opportunity and went for it. She latched onto Yumemi's perplexion like a fly to honey. "We had some localized straight winds come through I think. It blew your window right in and you got knocked out. I didn't know what to do so I called my friend Mako-chan for help. She lives nearby. Are you hurt? We can ring for an ambulance if you want."
"I... don't think so," Yumemi stuttered, beginning to push herself into a sitting position given the creaks emitted by the couch. It also sounded like she was scrubbing at her head. "I ache a little, but nothing too bad. Straight winds, you say?"
"Had to have been. Noise like a freight train," Makoto chipped in, speaking sagely as if from experience. "It didn't hit where I was but that's the nature of those winds. Like mini tornadoes out of nowhere!"
"Wow," Yumemi said. "I guess I really hit my head hard." She laughed at herself, Usagi knowing exactly what was coming next. "You'll never believe it. It's so silly. Instead if the wind, I dreamed it was a man chasing us and you were Sailor Moon and he turned me into a monster. Isn't that ridiculous!?"
The girls guffawed like it was, indeed, the most risible story they'd ever heard. Usagi even iced the cake for good measure. "Oh man. I wish I could be Sailor Moon. Then maybe I could have my sight back!"
It was enough to wipe the possibility clear from Yumemi's mind. Eventually the humor petered off as the older woman grew grim, taking stock of the devastation that had been done to her house. Usagi felt like she should apologize, because maybe if she'd heard the warning beeps from her wand she would've been able to get Yumemi out sooner, and this whole mess would've been avoided. "I'm sorry about your wrecked window, Yumemi-san. If there's anything I can do-"
"Oh, nonsense," Yumemi interrupted, Usagi blinking at her suddenly lighter tone. "You know... it's just a window. I'm still here, and so is my house. I'm lucky I have more than enough funds to have it repaired. You don't have to worry about me."
"I'll help you clean up," Makoto said, less an offer than a solemn vow of assurance. "I'm good at this kind of thing, you know." Usagi could almost see her accompanying wink now. She wished she could also lend her assistance, but first of all she was back to being blind as a bat. Secondly it was getting late.
And third - yet most importantly of all - she had Mamoru still tucked away and waiting for her promise of retrieval.
"Thanks, Mako-chan. She's a miracle worker, I swear it! I'll come and visit again tomorrow, okay Yumemi-san? I just have to get home or my mother will blow a gasket. Like I'm not kidding, she will ground me until I'm thirty, she hates me being out after dark that much! I'm sorry again about your window!" Usagi rambled, before dashing off to the cackles of the other two.
"That's Usagi-chan for you," Usagi overheard Makoto chortling, as she flew in her trademark whirlwind for the door.
"She's a beautiful person," Yumemi chimed in, almost reverently. "So unabashedly unafraid to be herself."
That was the last thing Usagi heard, before the wood slammed shut behind her. As she took off like a rocket in the opposite direction of home and her undoubtedly fuming parents, she spared a morose sigh over the pang that yet again taunted her conscience.
How many lies would it take before they realized, she wasn't worth the pedestal everyone seemed to put her on?
"Mamo-chan... Mamo-chan..."
The voice drifted down, down, down. It tickled at his consciousness like a song, long forgotten but heard again. It took a few more verses before the haze cleared enough for him to recognize who was calling to him, and for the picture of her face to weave together.
"Usako..."
In actuality it was Sailor Moon, but Mamoru was cogent enough see past the blurred edges of her glamour and know the person beneath. He squinted, trying to bring her into better focus, but it didn't make much difference. His head felt stuffed with cotton, his thoughts like errant leaves on a gusting breeze. There one second, gone the second, undulating off into the tangential. He could tell he was supine on the ground, that much was obvious from the rocks digging into his back, and there was something looming and black in the peripheral of his vision. A... truck tire?
That didn't make sense, he puzzled, nor did the obdurate ache that extended from his head to his toes. He felt utterly spent, like his insides had been put through one wash cycle too many - certainly not the delicate setting he usually used on his work shirts - and, did he remember to separate the whites from colors? He really did not want the red scrubs bleeding onto the white. Wait... where was he going with this again?
Ah yes.
Everything kinda sort hurt, but not in a terrible way. More in a 'ran a marathon a couple days ago and am still feeling the aftereffects' kind of way. There was also a strange detachment from it too. He tried to wiggle his toes just to prove he was still in control.
Truck... toe.
"Toe… truck?"
A giggle escaped past his lips; why was that so funny?
He felt like he had one foot in lucidity and one out. It would've been disconcerting…
If it weren't so darn funny.
"Still loopy, huh?" Usagi's voice suddenly broke in, and he realized she was still leaning over him with a sympathetic look on her face.
Loopy... wasn't that one of the Seven Dwarves?
Oh. That explained it.
"I must have ate an apple," Mamoru told her, very seriously.
Usagi looked like she wanted so badly to roll her eyes but was refraining. Instead she kept up with the picture of patience. "No, Mamo-chan. You healed yourself during the battle, remember? You finally did it! But now you're a little..."
"Dwarfy," he nodded, definitely following along although he couldn't quite recall this battle she spoke of. But he did remember many many long nights of trying to coax out his mysterious powers, and many many nights before that of trying to squelch them out of existence because he didn't want to seem like an aberration in front of the other boys.
"Does that mean they like me now?" he asked Usagi, in a small voice.
"Who?" Usagi asked, eyes flicking between the two of his as she matched his somber tone.
"The orphan boys. They won't tease me anymore?"
"Oh, Mamo-chan," she murmured, a light like comprehension dawning upon her crystalline azures. "They won't. Not ever again."
He sighed, a great sense of peace billowing over him like a soft warm blanket. His eyes flittered shut and he felt at last like he could relax.
"Don't go to sleep, Mamo-chan!"
He pouted at her stern tone but dragged his eyes open again, finding it a much more concerted effort than before to refocus on her. She looked worried.
"We need to get you home. How is a really good question," she grumbled the last to herself as if in rhetorical, "But maybe if- if I can just get you up again-"
"I have a car," Mamoru interjected helpfully.
Usagi stared. "Yes I know that..." she hedged, cocking her head as though uncertain as to his meaning. "But it doesn't really do us any good if it's not here..."
"It's here," Mamoru said, trying to cling to this bout of sanity while he had it. "Parked just around the corner."
"O-oh. Okay. In that case... I guess... I'll be driving, huh?" She looked extremely unnerved by that fact, but it didn't dissuade her resolution. That same inner empowerment enabled her to reach down, sling one of his jelly arms over her shoulder, and guide him upright. He admired her for it. She truly was a Superwoman, and it was without any reservation that he told her as such.
The blonde turned an adorable shade of fire engine red. "I hope you'll still be saying that when you experience my untrained lead foot," she muttered. "I've only been out a handful of times with my Papa. Mostly just in parking lots."
Mamoru had the sense that were he fully cogent, this should concern him, but he just smiled blithely and informed her he had absolutely no qualms putting his life in her hands. She, meanwhile, looked more nauseous the closer to his Ferrari they got.
"Mamo-chan... seriously... I suck at this... and your car is so expensive..."
"I'll help you, I promise. I'm your duly certified backseat driver," the man snickered, as she eased him into the rear of the vehicle and he passed her over the keys. The normally unrestrained gung-ho-her-way-into-every-blessed-situation-no-matter-how-dangerous girl took them with such reticence that something told him he should buckle up tight... a premonitory thought that served him well when Usagi pulled out moments later with an almighty lurch. His head smacked the headrest behind him, hard.
If he wasn't seeing stars before, he certainly was now.
"Oh God... I'm sorry Mamo-chan... are you still okay back there?" Usagi cried, turning back to check on him.
"I'm fine - watch the road!" Mamoru yelped, now doubly glad for his seatbelt as she swerved unexpectedly left. There was no doubt in his mind he would be a puddle upon the floor were it not there holding him in place. She finally decelerated into a speed that was kinder on the heart and he welcomed the reprieve with a sideways gaze out the window. Night had descended and the halo lights of street lamps streamed by in a blur, melding into one unending line that he felt himself getting lost in. He felt like they were racing through a trippy, psychedelic tunnel. The light danced and morphed into strange shapes; pillars and fountains and a palace with a domed roof, wasn't that where she lived?
He startled out of his fever dream to Usagi calling his name, and not for the first time. He was mildly confused for a few seconds as to where he was and then he remembered Usagi was driving him home. Battle. Healed self. Feeling loopy. Right.
"Mamo-chan!?"
"M'here. I just... zoned out," he replied, the familiar fatigue dominating all other senses. The med student part of his mind found it fascinating the way his disorientation ebbed and flowed, but he could tell the inevitable crash was coming. Just a little longer, he urged himself.
"Don't scare me like that," Usagi moaned. "Anyway, I thought you were supposed to be helping me," she ribbed, as if trying to keep him grounded. "I already accidentally ran a stop sign, cut someone off, got flipped the bird, and I'm pretty sure I missed a turn somewhere because I have no idea where I am. Driving is hard... but night driving is harder! I don't recognize anything I should be!"
Mamoru squinted out the window. Thankfully he did recognize which side street Usagi had mistakenly wound up on, and redirected her back onto the main road. It was only about five mercifully uneventful minutes later that they were approaching his apartment complex, and Usagi piped up,
"Err... Mamo-chan? The parking garage attendant?"
He furrowed his brow. "Yeah, Roruni-kun. What about him?"
Usagi gaped at him like he'd hit his head, and well, that wasn't exactly far off the mark. But when he didn't answer the unspoken Seriously Mamo-chan how do you not know this in her thousand yard stare, she began to gesture urgently at her Senshi attire. "This? Won't he find it odd to see Sailor Moon driving your Ferrari?"
"Oh. He'll recognize it and wave you in. Plus the windows are tinted. Don't worry."
Usagi looked like she wanted to argue more, but really, what other choice did they have? She white-knuckled the steering wheel and drove slowly into the garage. Even Mamoru, who was so certain Roruni would pay the vehicle next to no mind, slumped a little further down just in case.
"He's eating a sandwich... he's looking... oh God please don't see me, please don't... oh, oh thank goodness. We're in." Usagi expelled a loud breath she must have been holding. Mamoru couldn't help the hysterical mirth that bubbled up as he wondered what Roruni would have thought had he known he just granted two of Tokyo's most famous superheroes passage into the underground of Azabu Apartments. He knew the man was next level otaku. He would have absolutely nerded out.
Usagi relaxed. "Jeez that was a close one. I don't know what I would have said if he asked me to roll the window down!"
"You wouldn't have had to say anything. But he probably would have fallen over himself asking for you to autograph his sandwich or for your hand in marriage or something," Mamoru laughed. "He's got a major crush on the Sailor Senshi."
Usagi squeaked out a noise that was nonsensical yet undeniably embarrassed. Her cheeks and nose broke out in a rash of hot pink, and Kami-sama he could have admired her face forever.
Mamoru suddenly realized he was staring, and... was that a fleck of drool? He hastily swiped and sat more upright, glad for Usagi's distraction as she pulled into his assigned spot. Her voice was overcome with awe as she reflected, "I did it. I really did it. I got us back in one piece! But... Mamo-chan?"
"Hm?"
"You are definitely still the default driver, 'kay?"
Mamoru snorted. "Deal."
Usagi came around to lend her assistance as he disembarked. By this point he had regained some of his strength, but he was still dead tired and wanted nothing more than to sleep for oh, say a century. Rip Van Winkle knew where it was at. They peeked around the garage to confirm it was empty, then Mamoru leaned lightly upon his smaller companion, just enough to ensure he wasn't going to trip over his own feet. He mostly carried himself this time though, not wanting to burden Usagi any more than was necessary. When they reached the lobby, they both looked at each other and seemed to have jumped upon the same wavelength. He closed his eyes and felt his garments shifting themselves back into the ordinary shirt, jacket, and pants from earlier today, and when he opened them again Usagi had done the same. Knowing she no longer had the benefit of sight, Mamoru began leading them across the marble floor and over to the elevator. He had the blushing realization that to any passerby, they must simply appear at first impression to be two lovebirds cuddling, heading up for a nightcap.
Maybe it was this fleeting image of what could be that prompted it, and his still loose, uninhibited thoughts. The film reel of the past few days fresh in his mind. Or maybe, it was that Usagi could no longer analyze his features, and that freedom bolstered him. Gave him the opportunity to fixate ever more closely upon her warm, determined features; the way she flashed him an affectionate, goofy smile as she punched in the buttons to his floor, using the braille he himself taught her. He could feel it growing; an insatiable urge begging to be satisfied. So long - so long - he had been holding back; a rickety dam that threatened to burst with the constant day to day onslaught of emotion withheld...
"Usako..."
"Yes?" She was breathy; light and beauty all wrapped up in the clumsiest body he'd ever had the pleasure of routinely colliding into.
"I... I've been wanting to tell you..."
Her fathomless blues gazed innocently up at him, at a point just over his shoulder, and she was still smiling, still looking at him like he was the very best person to have ever stumbled into her life.
"I..."
The elevator dinged their arrival and it was as if that sound broke the spell that had fallen over him. Suddenly, the words crowded in his throat and got stuck there, and he choked. Curse it all. Because even though he wanted to so achingly badly, the fear was just too intense. He couldn't compromise this beautiful friendship, the only truly close relationship he'd ever allowed, with something as silly and fragile and selfish as feelings. What if she wasn't ready? What if she didn't think of him that way at all?
Oh, but what if she did.
His heart hurt, his head pounded, and he felt the letdown like a physical pain. No. I can't. I can't risk losing her. All of a sudden the exhaustion was back, and it weighed heavy upon him like a pall made of stones. Inwardly, he fortified his walls, vowing not to slip on this one most important secret even though the rest of his brain felt as cooperative as mud. Usagi was still patiently waiting for the rest of his impromptu speech, but she must have sensed the change in the air because a deep crease settled between her brows like a bridge slapped upon a stormy inlet. Her hand darted out to support his elbow as he swayed.
"Sorry. Just feeling a little woozy again."
"No worries," she whispered, guiding him gently off the elevator and into the quiet dark of his hallway. "You... you were saying...?"
There was a scrutinizing intensity to her query, but he dared not decipher it. He swallowed and took the coward's route, turning away so as to unlock his door but also so that she could not witness the weakness in his eyes. It was agony to love someone and yet deathly fear their loss, all at the same time. "I... had just wanted to thank you," he murmured, feeling strangely disingenuous despite the fact that what he was about to express was still the honest truth. Just not the truth he wanted it to be. "Not only did you move mountains to get me home safe. You helped me get better control over my powers. And that's on top of trusting me enough to ally yourself with a man your friends think is synonymous with Dark Kingdom scum," he joked wryly. Usagi scoffed what probably would have been a fierce rebuttal on behalf of his character but he interrupted her with a heartfelt, "I just really don't have enough words to thank you, Usako. You... you've changed my life. In ways I never thought possible."
There. That was closer to what he wanted to tell her from the start, without completely revealing his hand. Satisfied, and now the kind of weary that seeps into one's very bones, he tottered his way into the apartment without even stopping to switch on the light or consider that he still had on a jacket and shoes. He single-mindedly stumbled to the couch, plopped himself down, and threw his head back against the cushion. He was halfway to snoring when he heard Usagi say,
"Um... Wouldn't you be more comfortable on the bed, Mamo-chan?"
"I will," he promised, in a sleepy garble so slurred he wondered if she even understood him. "Jus'... resting here for a minute."
"...uh-huh."
All was still for an ephemeral moment, and Mamoru felt himself drifting further and further away into a lovely deep restorative state. His mind was too far gone to be concerned with the fact that here Usagi was, a guest in his home, and he was about to pass out on her. Any other day and he would have been appalled at his rudeness, but all he could muster at current was a muffled little sigh of happiness at finally having the sweet relief of a couch beneath him and blanket tucked around him. Wait, was that always there?
Just before he welcomed the release of oblivion, Mamoru swore he felt a tickling brush through his bangs and the feather-light sensation of lips upon his skin, and did she just...?
But no, it had to be another fever dream, because already Usagi was gone, the shadows were morphing, and reality blurred until again he was looking upon the palace, the palace with the domed roof where she lived...
He knew this dream.
But this time, it went a little differently.
Usagi backed away from Mamoru, touching her lips and feeling altogether rather stricken.
Did she just...!?
Usagi didn't know what had come over her. She'd tapped into her maternal side, pulling off Mamoru's shoes and draping a blanket over his slumbering form, thinking that if he was inevitably going to spend the night on this sinking old couch, she may as well try to make him comfortable. That was when she found herself again leaning over him, so close she could feel the heat emanating off him; every shudder of breath in and the cool breeze as he sent it sailing back out. He smelled like dirt and sweat of course, as she was sure she did too, but underneath those earthy aromas was the familiar scent she had come to associate with Mamoru. With safety. With pure unfettered happiness.
It was intoxicating. And before she could fully comprehend or give reason for her actions, she bent even further forward, hands running through the softly sheared hair that gathered at his temple and laid a tender kiss there.
That was when a zap like electricity shot through her veins, and the shock of both that physical response and her own lapse in self control had her stumbling backwards. Her lips still tingled from where she made contact; a cavalcade of tiny fireworks going off in her belly. She stood there and rubbed at her arms until the goosebumps subsided, consciously choosing not to examine why on earth such a simple kiss had evoked such a magical reaction.
I'm just being a good friend, she repeated to herself, over and over. Just a good friend. All friends do this kind of thing, right?
Usagi sought distraction in the form of her brooch, and she decided then that the quickest and safest way to get home would be to turn herself back into Sailor Moon. She had to fight back a groan when she resumed her transformation and caught sight of the clock, however. Almost 8:30, her mother would chop her to pieces and serve her for dinner for sure! Her stomach grumbled at mention of food, a reminder of just how long it had been since she'd eaten anything. Yumemi's cookies were hours ago. She sure hoped Ikuko didn't plan on utilizing her favorite 'to bed with no supper' as punishment for Usagi's tardiness.
The blonde heroine looked back to Mamoru, and she could feel her face relaxing into a soft smile at the way he slept with mouth semi-parted and eyelashes fluttering. Hopefully good dreams, she thought. In this light, features slack and moon painting a white cast over his profile, he looked much younger than his eighteen years. More like the boy she had seen earlier, only less hollow. Less broken. This was the way she wished him to always be - at peace; trauma in the rearview. Watched over by someone who...
Cared about him. Usagi blushed, because she almost thought a different word. She shook herself. She really didn't have time to be dawdling. The door leading out onto the balcony appeared to be unlocked, and with a last glance at Mamoru, the girl deemed him set for the night and went bounding out onto the nearest rooftop.
She made it home in record time, and even had the fleeting thrill upon slipping into the house and sensing no one that perhaps she had managed to evade a confrontation. She had been sure she would encounter her grumpy father, arms crossed and pulsing forehead vein, or her mother, tapping menacingly upon the counter with a spatula. At very least her brother, all too eager to tattle on his delinquent sister. Instead she heard the blaring of the television further away in the living room, and smelled - surprisingly - hot food wafting from the kitchen. She cautiously wandered in, still expecting to get hollered at at any moment, and with searching fingers found that it was a plate piled to the brim with pork fried rice and vegetables. Leftovers? For me?
Hardly believing her good fortune, and feeling incredibly grateful for her loving Mama right now, Usagi began to scarf down the dinner that had been saved for her. She was midway through the dish and savoring every sticky lick of the finger when she heard a minuscule creak and froze.
"M-Mama?"
"Usagi," came the hushed acknowledgement, from only a foot or two to the left.
Usagi felt like a deer in the headlights, a thief caught in flagrante delicto, and she slowly lowered her chopsticks back to the plate. She swallowed, a sneaking suspicion taking hold. "H-how long have you been standing there?"
"Quite a while. I've been waiting for you, you see."
Usagi bowed her head, very aware of where this was going. She supposed it was nice she was still getting dinner and not being shouted at, at least, but somehow this quiet disappointment radiating in waves off of Ikuko was worse.
"Did you not realize how late it was?"
"I- I did..."
"Then why, pray tell, are you home hours after dark? For the second time in less than a week? Don't you remember what your father and I told you?"
"I do," Usagi said, unshed tears wanting to well behind her eyes. She was suddenly not very hungry anymore. She clenched her fists and dug them into her hips, struggling for composure, especially when her mother pushed fiercely,
"How dangerous it is, for you to be out alone?" The fear riding alongside the scolding in Ikuko's voice was like a dagger to Usagi's heart. She wished she could tell her mother why it wasn't as dangerous for her as it would be for a normal blind girl. Why she had to be allowed to come and go, and what was at stake if she did not. She wished she could tell her everything. But like most things in her life lately, Usagi pursed her lips and kept her secrets locked tight. Ikuko stepped closer. "Where were you?"
"Mako-chan's," she said, quickly summoning up the name of someone she'd been with. A classic tactic that made her feel better because at least it wasn't a prevarication.
"Usagi," Ikuko deplored, a chasm of emotion hidden within that one word. "Please don't lie to me."
"I'm not!" Usagi protested, actually taking a little bit of offense. "You can call her and ask, I really was, we were hanging out and I just lost track of time-"
"I know where you were," Ikuko cut in, still more quietly. Usagi had the distinct impression she did not want Kenji and Shingo to hear. It made her very nervous as to what Ikuko was about to say next. "You were with Mamoru-san."
Usagi gaped like a fish out of water, so taken aback was she. She cursed her mute shock because it likely revealed far more to Ikuko than anything else could have. It took real effort to deflect weakly, "You don't know that."
"I do."
"Did you... see us?" Usagi asked suddenly, because that could open a whole other can of worms she wasn't ready for.
Ikuko puffed out a rather long-suffering sigh. "I could tell you it was my motherly intuition but in all honestly, you reek of him, honey."
Usagi wasn't sure she could blush any harder than she was now. "It's... it's not what you think," she squeaked out, starting to feel as though the room was caving in around her. She was finding it difficult to drag in enough air. Now she really wished her mother would have just yelled and sent her to bed hungry instead.
"Usagi," Ikuko deadpanned. "You do realize I was a young girl in love once too, right? I know how it is."
There was a surprising gentleness to Ikuko's voice, and her comment felt like a weird moment of deja vu to Usagi who remembered herself thinking something similar only earlier today. Still, she couldn't get past the whole messy awkwardness of this unwanted situation and so she started literally backing herself out of it. One slow footfall after another.
"Sweetheart, if you're becoming romantically involved with Mamoru-san, it's alright. I'm not mad. He's a lovely boy. But it is something we need to talk about-"
"Mama, you don't know anything! I'm telling you it isn't like that! He's... he's my friend. Just a friend!" she called upon her mantra from earlier. She could tell Ikuko did not believe her, and really, what other defense did she have? If she smelled that much like Mamoru, there was really no other recourse; no explanation she could provide that made sense. And she certainly couldn't give Ikuko the real reason. She turned tail and bolted for the stairs. "I don't want to talk about this anymore!"
"Usagi!"
But the teen ignored her mother, and she raced with precision all the way to her bedroom before slamming the door. Then she jumped into bed, street clothes and all, and started wailing with frustrated fists upon her pillow. Mid-punch, Luna's voice interrupted sympathetically,
"Another row with your Mama about being late?"
Usagi looked over and saw the black cat's white-yellow aura perched upon her dresser, but she leapt down onto the mattress once discovered. Usagi huffed and flopped down as if to sleep, though she had a feeling it would be a troublesome night for that. "Just fluffing my pillow," she answered sarcastically. Luna was silent and Usagi sighed. "Sorry. I don't mean to take it out on you. It's just... the lying. It's... it's getting to me."
In more ways than one. She glanced miserably at the guardian feline, musing upon how awful it was that she couldn't even offer full truths in this instance, either.
"We lie to protect the ones we love," Luna intoned seriously, and Usagi stared at her with a countenance to match. She willed Luna to understand perhaps through osmosis just how wretchedly she felt, that Luna was now grouped under that same umbrella of people Usagi was trying to protect, when she used to share everything with the cat. But was it really an act of love... or just pure selfishness?
She shut out the pain with a roll onto her side. "Goodnight, Luna."
"Goodnight, Usagi-chan."
oOo
She didn't sleep.
She tried, but it was a feat beyond her abilities at the moment, which was extremely out of the norm for her. She usually could fall asleep at the drop of a dime. Instead, visions of Mamoru accosted her from all angles, bringing with them an endless stream of worries -
Was he still doing okay? What if he grew worse, woke up and was so disoriented he didn't even realize where he was?
Worst case scenarios flooded her mind.
Maybe she should have locked the balcony door behind her. Maybe he would wake up starving and attempt to prepare food for himself, only to run afoul of the stove's burners. Maybe...
Maybe she should go just... just run over and check on him.
Once the idea was in her head, she couldn't shake it.
It wouldn't take long, Usagi reasoned. Merely a jump, skip, and a hop away. She would be back and in her bed well before dawn even began to creep over the horizon; no one would even know she was missing. Luna was lightly snoring over by the windowsill, and her family had long retired for the night. It's not like she was going to be able to rest until she was assured of his good health, anyway.
Convinced, the blonde wriggled as soundlessly as possible out of bed, glad to still be wearing her regular clothes for this venture. She tiptoed across her carpeting, creaked open the door, and slipped like a specter out into the hall. The house was her only witness as she floated down the stairs and out onto the front walk. The bushes made for a perfect spot to crouch down behind and transform, juuuust in case a stray passerby happened to be out for a midnight stroll.
And then the Moon Senshi was off, beating the pavement with sprinting boots, unaware that a story above, one bleary red eye opened and frowned at an empty bed.
oOo
Mamoru was still on the couch, thank God, and in nearly the same position as Usagi had left him a few hours before. At some point in the course of sleep, however, he must have disrupted the blanket with restless hands and knocked it to the floor.
See, Usagi thought, rather bullishly. I knew there was a reason to come.
She knew, objectively, how stupid and flimsy that excuse was, but it granted her the satiation she had been lacking laying in bed unable to do much else but fret over his condition. She scooped up the blanket and after a brief second of hesitation, settled down beside the motionless man. The couch groaned mulishly over an additional presence. She nestled the blanket back in around him and now stretched it to accommodate her as well.
This wasn't weird, right?
She rested her head in the crook of her palm as she simply watched him breathe, determined to hold vigil.
It was just something that friends did sometimes.
But the events of the day were finally catching up to her as well, and it was getting harder and harder to keep her eyes open, with the warm blanket and his even warmer body lulling her into a relaxed stupor. She could feel her head starting to droop forward towards his chest.
Right?
TO BE CONTINUED...
Author's Note: Well that chapter was only *checks last updated status* 10 months in the making! (Please direct all complaints to my one year old!) Yikes. When I first started this story, I never wanted to get in the habit of long waits. But then Bradley came along and now all bets are off the table. Reader, if you're a parent, YOU KNOW. How even when they finally get into a more predictable sleep schedule and you start getting some time to yourself again, it ALL goes to the chores you couldn't get done while they were awake. And even if you happen to get so lucky as to finish them early (or in my case, choose not to do them at all... tomorrow is always a new day xD), you are SO EXHAUSTED from a full day with your little humanoid version of a hurricane crossed with a leech that all you have the energy to muster is a half-hearted scroll through social media. It is HARD to keep up with your hobbies during this stage. BUT, you must. Because some days that is the only thing that makes you feel human. From falling into a deep hole of depression. I am so much happier now than I was when Bradley was first born. But as a parent, you really do walk that emotional tightrope every day. Writing is my escape; my outlet to sanity and reclaiming the person I once was. I chipped away at this sucker the whole ten months. I'm so proud of how it turned out, and hopefully the fact that it's over 9000 words (!), the most I've ever written in a single chapter, helps make up for that hiatus. I just love these goobers so much. Usagi and Mamoru are in a delicious place for an author right now. Oh the pining :) And if you'd believe it, we're only about six or seven chapters from the end right now. Everything's about to come to a head veeeery soon ;) BUCKLE UP FOLKS!
Thank you so much to all who sent well-wishes for Bradley's heart surgery! It went as perfectly as we could have hoped, and he was only in the hospital for five days! He recovered so nicely too, all there is now is a faint scar that by the time he's an adult, should not even be noticeable any more. Modern medicine is truly miraculous :)
Another shout out to all my reviewers, who kept me going on the days I had no motivation. I will read through your sweet, encouraging messages over and over to remind myself not to let you guys down. I'm flabbergasted and humbled by all the love and the loyalty. Your stalwart dedication is the reason I haven't ever thrown in the towel no matter how bleak my own circumstances felt. I promise this story will see its end. THANK YOU Moon Bunny, Astraearose-silvermoon, TropicalRemix, Jwalla1986, MyStormWarning, Guest (x3), Serendipity Kat, WeissCold, Ruk, TheMunnin, ShadowQueenGalactica, TinkStar87, smoon4409, merendinoemiliano, Princesakarlita411, Redmonkey3, ChangingTheStory, Oreo596, Vegasnickle, Tina Century, Nyx De Muertos, chastityjk, SaturnnFox, My Veggie Burger, Ldsprincess, AvatarUzumaki, Daire123, MoonP, Roxypockets1, and hime-futatsu!
P.S. How fun was my equivalent to drunk!Mamoru huh? xD
Big hugs,
AngelMoon Girl