Jade's chest was tight and she felt short of breath throughout the entire car ride to Cat's house from school. Even after she had angrily shushed Cat, the space felt too small and compressed. Much smaller than just that morning. Painful emotions and memories crashed around in Jade's head, and she felt about to explode, as though only the oppressive car was keeping everything bottled up inside her.

Out of the corner of her eye, Jade saw Cat tucking something into Jade's book bag. Jade felt a wave of anger rising in her at the intrusion into her belongings, and she almost snapped at Cat, but she managed to swallow her sharp words. Cat didn't deserve them. As it was, she was the only person who actually cared about Jade and hadn't abandoned her. And Cat shouldn't suffer for the way Tori and Beck had made Jade feel.

With a sigh of relief, Jade pulled into Cat's driveway and hurried out of the car, feeling some of the tension finally leaving her shoulders and hands as the walls around her disappeared. Cat unlocked the front door and waited at the threshold.

"I'm not staying," Jade said.

Cat cocked her head. "You're going home again? But what about your duffel?"

"I'll get it another day. I need to leave." Without waiting to hear Cat's response, Jade ducked into her car again, cracking open the windows and taking deep steadying breaths as she reversed.

Jade still didn't want to be at her house when her dad was there, but staying at Cat's house meant being in the same room as her for the entire afternoon. And even though Cat would give her space if she needed it, being around other people felt too enclosed and overwhelming at the moment. Jade needed time alone.

When Jade got home, she hurried to her room, where she closed the curtains and left the lights of. She lay on her floor in the dark, trying to bring order to her thoughts.

At the front of her mind was the feeling of betrayal and abandonment. Everyone who I've ever thought cared about me has ended up turning on me. Sarah. Tori. Beck. Cat hasn't yet, but I can't even endure being around other people enough right now to actually get any support from her.

Jade stayed there for a while, letting everything swim around in her mind: the vivid memories of the morning's breakup, the stinging hurt of knowing that Beck didn't actually care about her, but mostly… a feeling of being utterly and completely alone.

Jade almost wished she had stayed at Cat's housel, and she considered going back over or calling her, but then she remembered how she had felt when Cat had stepped into the janitor's closet with her that day during lunch. The walls had closed in, and the tightness that she had already felt became ten times worse. As much as she wanted support, physically being near other people was only making her anxious, chaotic state of mind worse.

Maybe I can just text Cat, then? Jade reached into her book bag and rooted around for her phone, but the first thing she grasped was a stack of papers. That's weird. I don't think I put any… Then Jade remembered Cat sticking something inside her bag. Could this be from Cat?

Curious, Jade flipped on a light and unfolded the papers, then began to read.

Hi, Jade.

I really don't even know where to start. I've scrapped what I've written like five times, and now I'm almost out of paper. So I guess this is the one I have to go with.

I just wanted to say I'm sorry for everything that happened last week. What I did to you was really mean, and I feel so bad that I hurt you. All I ever wanted was to be your friend, but for some reason I let myself get led astray by rumors. I'm not trying to defend my actions, I swear.

At first, I was planning on waiting longer to apologize because I thought you wouldn't want to hear what I have to say and that I should leave you alone, but today I realized that I was just delaying for selfish reasons. I was afraid that if I apologized right away, you would still be mad and wouldn't forgive me. But today I realized that I really needed to take responsibility for the hurt I caused you, and waiting to apologize would probably only hurt you more.

If you've taken the time to read this even though I'm sure you're really mad at me, thank you so much.

All I hope is that this apology will help reduce some of your pain. Again, I'm so, so sorry, and you didn't deserve what I did.

Tori

Jade looked at the note in her hands and brushed away a stray tear. If she had known what the note was - or who it was from - before, she never would have even opened it. But she was so glad that she had read it. It made her feel like she wasn't so alone anymore; she felt connected to Tori, as if she were sitting across from her listening to her speak, yet she didn't have to bear being too near someone. Jade felt more at peace than she had all day, as if the world were no longer collapsing around her. As if she, herself, were no longer collapsing.

Jade felt compelled to talk to Tori. This wasn't a new feeling; it had been there all along, but Jade had buried it under a heap of stronger feelings like anger and hurt. But Tori's letter had helped clear away some of those other emotions, and Jade realized that maybe it would be okay to talk to Tori just a bit. She didn't have to trust just yet, but just having someone else in her life might make it easier to bear the things that were going wrong.

Tearing out a sheet of notebook paper, Jade began to work on a response.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Until next week!