Chapter Thirty - Anchor Point

Elizabeth sat at the dining table, her hands slipped around the mug of black filtered coffee as her mind ran away from her. She was in the exact same position she was in last night, only this time Henry wasn't adjacent to her, he wasn't even within the house and nothing tore her heart apart more. With a slow exhale she closed her eyes attempting to dilute all emotions swarming within. She had no idea how she was about to get through the day, but she knew she had too, people needed her, first and foremost, her children needed her.

'Oh My God, what the hell happened last night?' Stevie shouted as she came running into the kitchen disrupting the already unsettled silence. Elizabeth held her hand up gesturing for her to calm but it was no use as the other children came bundling down the stairs, all carrying their own bags of emotions.

'Mom, where is dad? I just checked he isn't in bed' Alison looked over concerned as she noted her mom's red puffy eyes, a clear indication she had been crying all night.

'Woah Mom! Seriously you always go on at me about how we were not allowed to drink and you let dad get like this' Jason laughed as he walked past his sisters. He threw his phone up in his mom's face and played a video that someone had edited of him staggering out of the venue on repeat.

'Jason stop' she moved his hand away not wanting to see video evidence, the memories of the night were vivid enough.

'So what happened?'

'Where is dad? Is he ok?'

'You look so pissed off in this video' Jason laughed as he kept watching it. The questions from the kids poured in thick and fast. Elizabeth stood up and rubbed her eyes trying to clear her thoughts to process anything within that instant.

'Mom'

'Mom'

'Mom' they all chorused as they continued to throw requests at her demanding answers from the only parent around. She snapped. She slammed her mug down and turned to face them all.

'Enough!' Her voice bounced from the walls and stunned them all to silence. 'Turn that video off before I take your phone off you Jason' she fiercely warned him. Jason Silently slipped his phone into his pocket and held his hands up admitting defeat. Elizabeth exhaled sharply and turned to finish making her coffee.

'Kids, we need to talk' she spoke calmly and moved over to the dining table, watching as they all cautiously joined her.

'Mom what's going on?' Alison asked sheepishly and Elizabeth took a deep breath.

'Your father has gone to see Grandpa for a few days-'

'Is Grandpa ok?' Jason cut across and Elizabeth reached out and placed a loving hand on his arm, gently rubbing him in a reassuring motion.

'Grandpa Is fine, everyone is ok' She smiled and looked over to the girls before continuing. 'Yes your father had one too many drinks last night as you have all clearly seen-'

'Not just us Mom, I think the whole world has seen it. It's all they're going to be talking about at work now' Stevie scoffed and Elizabeth glared at her, she was in no mood for her daughter's intolerance today.

'As I was saying, Your father had too many drinks last night and yes we had words about it and things are a bit tense between us at the minute but it will be ok' In that moment she didn't know if she was trying to reassure them or herself. 'The media is going to be all over this for the next few days so we decided to keep a low profile for your father so he took off to Grandpa's late last night' she lied.

'Wait he didn't drive did he? Have you spoken to him? Is he ok? He would have been over the limit" Elizabeth couldn't help but feel a little deflated that this was the second or third time they had asked if he was ok but hadn't asked about her. She couldn't help but allow her mind to wonder, questioning if she really was working too much.

'He didn't drive, One of the DS agents took him last night. I haven't spoken to your father yet, I think he is sleeping his hangover off, but I have spoken to Matt and he said they arrived in Pittsburgh around five this morning.' She confirmed.

'This is why I didn't want to stay in college, imagine the day you two are going to have in school today, everyone will be asking about this' Stevie moaned and Elizabeth shook her head

'It's not about you Stevie' Alison snapped. Elizabeth didn't have the energy to argue with her daughter so she simply sighed heavily.

'Mom, you and dad have been arguing a lot lately. Is everything ok between you both?' Alison asked nervously, her own emotions bubbling to the surface

'Well obviously not she has kicked him out to Grandpa's' Stevie mocked and stood from the table

'I did not kick your father out Stevie-'

'No but keep going and she might kick you out' Jason laughed at his older sister.

'I'm going to work' she moaned and grabbed her bag before storming off and slamming the front door, a sound that shook Elizabeth's core as a reminder of last night plagued her.

'Mom?' Alison's voice cracked and Elizabeth's heart sank

'Oh Noodle come here' she beckoned her daughter to her and embraced her within loving arms.

'Mom if you and dad split up does this mean I get to have two lots of monthly allowance?' Jason grinned and Elizabeth turned to him with tired eyes.

``We're not splitting up Jase. Everything's fine' she hissed a little as she spoke, forcing the words from her mouth.

'Sure, looks it…' he mocked and stood up, excusing himself from the table and heading back upstairs. Elizabeth continued to hold Alison and rock her softly as she cried into her mothers shoulder.

'Shh baby, it's ok' She soothed. Alison pulled back and Elizabeth softly wiped the tears from her eyes.

'When will dad be home?' She sniffled.

'I don't know Noodle, maybe a day or two, maybe a bit more' She replied softly, the first honest answer she was able to give her children.

'I wish he waited until this morning, I would have gone with him. I hate it in DC, everything has gone wrong since we moved here' she admitted and Elizabeth's mouth fell agape as her stomach drowned in sorrow. She pressed her lips together and forced her tears back.

'Everything's going to be ok Ali' Elizabeth kissed her daughter's head softly as she climbed from her embrace.

'I'm going to get ready for school' she sighed and swiftly left the kitchen, leaving Elizabeth alone with her thoughts once again. She glanced at her phone and sighed as her notification bar was full of messages and missed calls, all from her staff, Russell and Conrad, questioning the events of last night, but there was nothing from Henry. If there was one thing she would always bet on it would have been their marriage, she was so sure it would withstand anything but now, now she felt she had lost the bet, her only anchor point removed.

— MS —

'Henry?' Maureen called as she knocked on the window of the car. Henry woke up startled and jumped up. His eyes burned as his head pounded in response to the sunlight as his hangover took hold. It didn't take long before the events of last night came running back to him. Henry groaned in repose and cursed as Maureen knocked the window once again.

'Ok, Ok' he huffed as he unwrapped himself from his suit jacket which he had been using as a blanket and slowly opened the door. He cautiously stepped out as his legs woke up and the nausea within him settled.

'I should have known you'd run here' She raised an eyebrow at her brother and watched as he rubbed his temples.

'You've heard then' he mumbled

'Heard? Henry I've seen the clip of you leaving and heard the rumours about you shouting at the president? I hope for your sake they're not true' she warned.

'At least let me have a coffee before you give me a lecture' He reasoned and she shook her head.

'Get in, I guess you're going to be staying with dad for a few days then?' She pressed as they started to walk into the house. Henry sighed heavily, his heart deflated.

'Looks like it. I've really messed up Maureen' came his flat response, the realisation his marriage was in ruins pushed through to his core and settled within.

— MS —

Elizabeth thought that by coming into work early she would avoid the ambush from her team this morning however no matter how much she convinced herself she knew deep down it was inevitable. She sat at her desk watching the scenes before her, her staff all speaking over one another, firing questions at her and hounding her for a response, mimicking the actions of her children that morning. She couldn't peel her eyes away from the chaos, but neither could she control it within that moment.

The questions being thrown around the room echoed within her, as they mixed with her anger and upset over the whole situation, none of them giving a thought as to the complexity of the situation, just once again worried about how this was going to look. She chuckled at the irony, Henry was right, it really was all about the optics. Henry. She closed her eyes slowly and thought of him, vivid images of her Husband within her mind, images that once made her smile but now fill her with anger and irritation over the mess they found themselves within. Elizabeth's stomach began to turn as her emotion rose to the surface, she wanted silence, the disruption was unsettling her. Her bottom lip began to tremble ever so slightly as she sat with her anger, only this time her anger reintroduced herself as grief.

'Just stop' she whispered. The pleading tone nipped at Blakes ears as he looked over at the secretary. He looked back to Mike B and Daisy who were still in a heated discussion, he searched the room for Nadine, desperate for her to finish her phone call and to command the staff to behave but when she didn't come and his boss pleaded for things to stop he knew he had to step in.

'Why don't we stop, maybe think private thoughts for now' He gave them both a glaring eye and nodded in Elizabeth's direction. All eyes were now on her as she sat at her desk, her hands resting under her chin as she peached with her eyes fixed in the distance, a vacant daze. She wasn't even aware that the office had fallen to silence as her internal thoughts were still so loud. It was only when Blake took a seat in front of the desk did she come from her daze and fix on him.

'Ma'am?' He asked softly

'What are the press asking for?' She looked over to Daisy, the tiredness within her slowing her movements down.

'They urm… They want a statement. They have the evidence of what they believe is the aftermath of a fight between yourself and Dr McCord. There are also rumours that Dr McCord has, shall we say 'words' with the president. They want that confirmed' She spoke confidently.

'Where is Nadine?' Elizabeth asked, looking at Blake, the only one who she could consider a friend as well as colleague.

'She is on the phone to Russell Jackson Ma'am. I think he tried to call you but had no response, they were concerned' He smiled softly.

'We all were. I mean what happened is so out of character for Henry' Mike B chipped in and Elizabeth glanced up at him. Her eyes fuelled with rage as her breathing depended.

'Don't. I will talk to you in a minute' she glared and Mike instantly backed down. She averted her gaze to Daisy.

'I am not giving you anything until I have spoken to Russell, Nadine and the President-'

'Madam Secretary they press want an answer, they're going to hound me for information I cannot address them with nothing. Nothing makes it look like an admissions that this big bust up did happen between you and Dr McCord and if you don't say anything it just makes this look like an ever bigger mess than it is-' she rambled and Elizabeth lost her cool

'I don't care Daisy, what is going on is a personal matter and not one that I need the world speculating on. I am not confirming or denying anything until I have spoken to POTUS, I need to speak with him,' she glanced at Blake as she spoke, signalling she needed her motorcade which he understood and left to make sure it was ready for her.

'Madam Secretary the Press needs answers, they have second hand information and they're going to twist that into whatever they wish. If we do not confirm the events of last night, there are rumours that Dr McCord left the family home last night, things need to be addressed' She ranted at her boss.

'They do not need a thing Daisy. Everyone in that room is waiting for the show, but what they fail to remember is that I am a human being and I am entitled to privacy. I do not need to hear their stories or see things through their cameras to understand their point of view, I know how this looks and I am living in it.-' Elizabeth rose as her emotions boiled over inside.

'With the greatest respect Elizabeth, I don't think you do understand how this looks' Mike B stepped in and defended Daisy. Elizabeth snapped her head over to him

'It looks like Henry had far too much to drink, got into a heated discussion with Conrad, Henry and I then argued over it and left the venue. Then later in the night he left the family home. I've seen the headlines questioning if there is 'Trouble in paradise' to quote one of them. Everyone is wondering if our marriage is in ruins, if him leaving the family home means were heading for divorce and you know what, it's something I am questioning myself so I would appreciate it if my staff would do their job and keep the goddamn press off my back until I have spoken with he President' She flipped, the truth cascading from her mouth and spilling all around the room, consuming everyone within it, now they were all drowning within the truth. Elizabeth panted heavily as her anxieties crept inside and took a hold, squeezing her lungs trying to rid her of any last scraps of air she could inhale.

'I told you, both of you. I said Henry wasn't coming and you both tried to override me and went to Henry directly, got him to agree to come. Well, thanks, not only did you go over my head which is incredibly disrespectful but you also created this mess for yourself. Had you just left it alone this wouldn't have happened' She spat angrily as both Mike and Daisy hung their heads in shame. 'Daisy I suggest you refrain from speaking to the press until I get back from the white house and Mike… I strongly suggest you make yourself scarce today, probably tomorrow as well' She demanded.

'I'll have a word with you both in my office' Nadine spoke sternly as she watched the scene before her. Neither of them had noted her appearance in the room until she spoke. Elizabeth took deep breaths as she attempted to keep her tough exterior in check in front of her staff.

'I'll deal with these two, Madam Secretary. The president is expecting you. He has asked that Blake join the meeting too' Nadine smiled sadly knowing just how this meeting was going to go, she had after all just had Russell chew her ear off about last night's events for the past forty minutes. Elizabeth nodded as uncertainty crept in. All the staff left the room leaving her and Blake alone.

'I've got you fresh coffee' he smiled softly

'I think I am going to need something stronger' she chuckled and took the cup from him. 'Thank you' her words were soft and delicate as she slowly walked out of the office and down to her motorcade. Her stomach in knots wondering what was going to be said to her. As she sat in the car and began her journey she heard her phone bleep. She instantly pulled it out of her pocket and looked at the message,

To: Elizabeth

From: Henry

Good luck with POTUS, I'm Sorry x

Her mind spiralled into overdrive, a thousand questions of her own hit her. Her stomach swirling around like a ship caught in a deadly storm. And just like the waves would crash on deck her thoughts crashed into her, What does that mean? Has he spoken to POTUS? How did he know I was going now? What is he sorry for? She was drowning beneath the deck, desperate for a life jacket to help her float but it was no use, she continued to drift and her mind cascaded out of control, after all, she had lost her anchor point.