(Disclaimer: I own nothing, they are the property of their respective owners).
(Author's Note: This is my attempt to write a big bang theory fanfic, it ain't much, but it's interesting, this is one of those ideas that came to me a while back).
Big Bang Theory - The Star Wars Nightmare.
It's nighttime at the apartment, Sheldon exits his room, and walks to Leonard's Bedroom door, he knocks on it.
Sheldon - Leonard.
He knocks a second time.
Sheldon - Leonard.
He knocks a third time.
Sheldon - Leonard.
The door opens, it's Leonard, he's wearing a robe.
Leonard - What is it?
Sheldon - I can't sleep.
Leonard - So you wake me up at 3 in the morning to tell me that?
Sheldon - Yes.
Leonard - Go away, I have company over.
Sheldon - Hello, Penny.
Penny (off screen) - Hi, Sheldon.
Leonard - Get lost.
Sheldon - What am I supposed to do?
Leonard - I don't know, go outside and count the stars or something.
Sheldon - Count the stars? Elementary.
Leonard - Goodnight, Sheldon.
He closes the door, and locks it.
Sheldon - Well, that was rude.
Sheldon walks away from his door, and heads to his living room.
He enters the living room, and walks over to the couch, and sits down.
Sheldon - What to do, what to do.
He pauses, and looks over at the entertainment center.
Sheldon - I could watch Star Trek: The Motion Picture, and criticize it.
He ponders for a moment.
Sheldon - No, I'll do that tomorrow.
There's a knock at the door.
Sheldon - Who could that be at this hour?
He gets up and goes to the door, he unlocks it, and opens the door, it's a familiar face, dressed in a Jedi outfit.
Sheldon - Jake Lloyd?
Jake Lloyd - Hello, Sheldon.
Sheldon - What are you doing here?
He pulls out something, it's a lightsaber, it's turns on.
Sheldon - What are you gonna do with that?
Jake slowly starts walking forward, Sheldon begins walking backwards.
Jake Lloyd - I saw what you wrote online about my performance in Phantom Menace.
Sheldon - Now, c'mon, it's not your fault, you were a kid.
Sheldon continues walking backwards, he backs into someone, it's another man dressed in a Jedi costume, he's also armed with a lightsaber.
Hayden Christensen - Hello, Sheldon.
Sheldon - Hayden Christensen?
Hayden Christensen - You criticized my acting, and my performance in Attack of the Clones.
Sheldon - Again, it's not your fault, you just had bad direction in that movie. You're great in Life as a House, and also in Jumper, even though that film has no logic whatsoever.
Jake Lloyd - Let's get him!
Hayden Christensen - Hold on, fool, we must wait for the others.
Sheldon - Others?
Out of the shadows, emerges another familiar face.
Sheldon - James Earl Jones?
James Earl Jones - Hello, Sheldon.
Sheldon - You're not here to beat me up, are you?
James Earl Jones - No, I'm just here to watch.
Another familiar face emerges from the darkness, except he's dressed up as the Joker, and is talking in his Joker voice.
Mark Hamill (Joker voice) - Hello, Sheldon.
Sheldon - Now, what are you doing here?
Mark Hamill (Joker voice) - It doesn't matter why we're here, what matters is our plan.
Sheldon - What plan?
James Earl Jones - This is CNN, breaking news, a local scientist from the university gets beat up by actors from Star Wars.
And yet, another familiar face shows up from out of nowhere.
Wil Wheaton - And me.
Sheldon - Oh, now this is getting ridiculous, he's not even in Star Wars.
Wil Wheaton - You're right, I'm not. I'm just here for the occasion, just to watch...
Sheldon (interrupting) - Shut up, Wesley.
Jake Lloyd - Enough words! Let's get him!
Jake charges at him, and knocks him down, and begins kicking him, Hayden joins in, as does Wil, James Earl Jones watches on, and Mark Hamill laughs in his joker voice. While this is happening, Leonard enters the living room.
Leonard - Uh, guys?
Everyone stops and talks to him.
Everyone - Hi, Leonard.
Leonard - Can you guys please keep it down, I have company over.
Mark Hamill (Joker voice) - Want me to finish the job for you?
Leonard - That won't be necessary, goodnight.
Everyone - Goodnight, Leonard.
Leonard walks away, and heads back to his room.
Mark Hamill (Joker voice) - Now, where were we?
They continue hitting him.
Sheldon wakes up, he's in his bed, he looks around, and is relieved.
Sheldon - That was unusual.
Another person is in bed with him, it's Amy, she sits up.
Amy - Another bad dream?
Sheldon - You have no idea.
He gets out of bed, heads to the wall, and knocks on it.
Sheldon - Leonard!
He knocks a second time.
Sheldon - Leonard!
He knocks a third time.
Sheldon - Leonard!
Leonard (off screen) - What?!
Sheldon - I had a bad dream!
Leonard (off screen) - So?!
Sheldon - It was unusual, not to mention ridiculous, and over the top.
Leonard (off screen) - Goodnight, Sheldon!
Sheldon - Goodnight, Leonard.
He returns to his bed.
Amy - Please try to get some sleep.
Sheldon - I'll try.
Amy - Night, Sheldon.
Sheldon - Goodnight, Amy.
He lays back down.
Sheldon - It was all a dream.
They turn to face each other, there's a familiar face laying between them.
Mark Hamill (Joker voice) - Oh, I wouldn't say that.
He begins cackling in his Joker voice, Both Sheldon and Amy start screaming.
Raj wakes up screaming, he's in his sleeping bag, he's in Howard's room, who also wakes up.
Howard - What's up?
Raj - I just had this weird and unusual dream.
Howard - What was it about?
Raj - I had a dream that a group of actors from Star Wars and Star Trek beat up Sheldon.
Howard - If they knew what he said about their movies on rotten tomatoes and Ain't it Cool News, they probably would.
Raj - And also that Sheldon and Amy were in bed with Mark Hamill, who was dressed up as the Joker.
Howard - Ok, now that's even more weird, even for me.
Raj - So. Didn't you have a sexy dream about Lynda Carter and Jessica Rabbit?
Howard - Not so loud!
A voice from down the hall is heard shouting.
Howard's Mother (off screen) - Howard! What was that noise?!
Howard - Nothing, Ma! Go back to sleep!
Howard's Mother (off screen) - Hard to do that when you're shouting out loud!
Howard - I know the feeling!
He turns to Raj.
Howard - Sorry about that.
Raj - It's okay.
Howard - I'm going back to sleep.
Raj - Same here, after I write this down real quick.
Howard - Alright.
Howard lays back down in his bed, Raj gets a notebook from his overnight bag, and starts writing down the details of his dream.
The End.
(Author's Note: What do you think? let me know. Maybe I'll do another big bang theory fanfic at some point down the line, but we shall see).