Disclaimer: The characters of Inuyasha are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, but this story belongs to me.

Chapter Eight: Inuyasha's Path to Self Discovery

It was difficult keeping his temper as he wrapped her ankle. He wanted to yell at her for jumping down the well… again. All weekend she had been jumping down the stupid thing. Her arms and legs were scratched up badly, and he couldn't even count all the bruises. And just that morning she sprained her right ankle badly.

Taking away her crutches didn't deter her either, she just hopped over to the well house.

So there he was re-wrapping her ankle as they sat at the bottom of the well. She had made a dash for it when he let her out of his sight to go use the restroom. He shrugged to himself, deciding that he would just have to tie her to something if he had to leave the room, or handcuff her to him. He smiled a bit at that last thought.

"You have to stop jumping, Kagome."

"I can't."

"Yes you can. If you don't, I'll just have to tear this thing down."

She frowned at him and unsuccessfully tried to tug her ankle away from his hands. "Why do you guys always think the answer to things is to tear it down or plug it up?"

"You have to stop."

"I. Am. Not. Crazy."

Inuyasha secured the loose end of the wrap and let her have her leg back. "Then stop jumping down old dried up wells. You're going to end up in the hospital with all your bones broken. What am I supposed to tell people? What do I tell your family after you've snapped your neck? What do I tell your mother when you die down here?" He slammed his fist against the wall in frustration. "I can't live without you, Kagome. Don't do this to me."

It wasn't necessarily the way that he planned on telling her how he felt. It was a little too late to take the words back, though. Maybe she wasn't paying attention, he hoped. He glanced at her shocked face and dropped jaw. Figures she'd start paying attention NOW. Quickly he kept the conversation moving so she wouldn't have time to think about what he said.

"I know that this is confusing for you. I can't even begin to imagine how confusing though. But, Kagome, this is real. We are. I am. Our school, our friends, our memories. This is real life."

"I know," she whispered, sounding defeated.

Seeing as how it didn't look like she was going to attempt to scramble up the well for another plunge, Inuyasha felt safe in scooting around to sit beside her. He bumped her with his shoulder, and she leaned her head against it and took his hand in hers.

"Tell me something real," she asked softly.

Inuyasha thought for a moment, then smiled broadly. "I remember the first time you baked me cookies."

She groaned. "I meant something nice. Don't you have any good stories?"

"It is a good story."

"No it's not. It's a Kagome-is-a-stupid-idiot story."

"It's cute!" he insisted. "I remember that you couldn't tell the difference between a tablespoon and a teaspoon, so the salt and baking powder was more than quadrupled! And you chopped up the unsweetened baking chocolate thinking it would be the same as regular chocolate chips."

"Yeah yeah, yeah," she rolled her eyes and wrapped her arms around her drawn up legs, "And I put it on Broil instead of Bake. I was there. I'm the one who had to explain why the fire trucks were outside our house to my mom."

"Hey, remember the cinnamon toast you made? You just sprinkled on a ton of cinnamon on the bread instead of mixing it with sugar."

Kagome smiled, albeit reluctantly. "You ate it though." She poked him in the ribs. "Don't you have any non-cooking disaster memories?"

"Sure… but they aren't as much fun."

"Well," smirked the girl as her eyes twinkled merrily, "I remember when you decided that you could cut your own hair." It was Inuyasha's turn to groan. It was the second worst haircut in the world. "Then," Kagome said in a syrupy sweet voice, the kind that made his DANGER radar go off. "You decided to cut MY hair." Second worst haircut next to Kagome's.

"I thought we decided to never talk about that again."

"You bring up my cooking, I bring up your hair styling."

Inuyasha grimaced. "Don't call it hair styling. There was no styling involved. Just a little cutting."

"Hacking."

"Whatever."

Kagome laughed, making Inuyasha's heart do that little fluttery thing. "This is kind of fun. We should do it more often."

Inuyasha looked up at the circle of light above them, then around the darkened well. He hoped she meant the hanging out and strolling down memory lane with him, not the jumping down the well and patching up sprained limbs part. He couldn't help but smile at her though. It was the first time she laughed all weekend.

"You're my best memories, Inuyasha."

"You're my best memories, too."

"Let's go to the movies," she suggested as she (unfortunately) pulled away from him. "I think we deserve a treat."

"Great, from one dark and smelly place to another."

"INUYASHA!"

Chuckling he stood up and carefully pulled her upright. He was starting to get pretty good at hauling her up the well. It was improving his upper body strength. He should probably thank her for the great workout. Briefly he wondered if he gained any muscle mass over this.

Once out of the well he gave Kagome a piggy back ride while carrying her crutches into her house. He dropped her off in her bedroom so she could change into something more appropriate for the movies. Something clean. Inuyasha leaned against her door and listened to her awkward movements, trying to pretend for a moment that this was a real date instead of just going out as friends. Of course, if it was a real date he probably wouldn't be outside her door listening in on her like this. He pulled away from her door and leaned against the wall instead.

She really was all his best memories. In fact, he smiled, she's in all my memories.

All of them.

But was that really possible? Surely not. There had to be memories that didn't involve Kagome. But he couldn't think of a single one. There wasn't even one from when she moved away. He remembered seeing her leave… he remembered feeling so desperately alone… and then he remembered seeing her again. But there was nothing in between. Absolutely nothing.

Before he could question his memory quirk, Kagome opened the door.

His heart fluttered again. It may not be a real date, but she was dressed like it was. She was wearing a pretty yellow sundress with a pale blue sweater folded over one arm. A faint flowery scent lingered in the hair, causing him to grin like an idiot. She was wearing perfume. For him.

Well, it was possible she was wearing it because she wanted to smell nice for herself, but he was allowed to be as delusional as he wanted to be.

"You look nice," he said.

She blushed at the compliment. Then he blushed too. They were having an actual 'moment'. Maybe it was a date after all! Holding his breath he took one of the biggest chances of his life… and reached for her hand.

And she didn't pull away!

Does life get any better than this?

The walk to the movie theater and the movie itself was all a blur. He could have teleported there for all he knew. The only thing that was registering in his brain was that he was holding hands with Kagome. He couldn't recall buying the tickets or going into the theater, his whole world revolved around the hand holding his. He was barely even aware when Sango and Miroku found them outside the theater once whatever movie they apparently saw was over. When they went for some ice cream, Inuyasha couldn't even manage to work up any irritation over them inviting themselves along.

What did catch his attention, however, were the stories that Sango and Miroku were sharing with Kagome while they ate their ice cream. Every single story involved Kagome in one way or another. Had any of them ever talked about their lives before they came to their school?

"Soooo… what was your life like before you came to our school?" Inuyasha asked Miroku hesitantly.

For a moment the other boy looked blankly back at him. Then he blinked and smiled warmly. "It is in the past, and best forgotten."

"Surely you left some friends there. Or family?"

Miroku shrugged. "I've left no one behind."

Inuyasha turned his attention to Sango. "What about you?"

"Me?"

"What was your life like before you moved here? Did you leave any friends or family behind?" His heart was beating hard. His chest was aching. The sinking feeling in his stomach was making him nauseas. Pushing his spoon around his dish of ice cream, he studied his friends. He saw Kagome lick a drop of ice cream that was running down the side of her ice cream cone. But… the cone that Miroku had wasn't dripping… and neither was the ice cream in Sango's banana split.

Sango shrugged. "I like to focus on the present. The past is best forgotten."

"What…." Inuyasha paused, unsure if he wanted to ask anymore questions. It already felt as if someone had ripped the heart and lungs out of his chest. "What were you and Miroku up to before meeting us at the theater? Out on a date or something?" He noticed Kagome perk up at the idea.

Miroku and Sango looked at each other for a moment, then turned smiling faces Inuyasha. "Nothing important. Just hanging."

Inuyasha fell silent and drummed his fingers on the table as they began chatting animatedly to Kagome. Now that he thought about it… what had HE been doing before coming over to Kagome's? He couldn't remember. In fact… he was having a difficult time even trying to picture a time when he wasn't with Kagome.

It wasn't possible… was it?

Wishing he could push the disturbing thoughts from his head he decided he would find Shippo and question him about his memories too. He got up from the table and went to the door. But he couldn't open it. His heart wouldn't let him leave Kagome. In fact, he couldn't even manage to put his hand against the door.

"Let's track down Shippo," he suggested suddenly. "We'll go to the arcade or something and play some video games."

"Sounds like fun!"

Kagome stood up and met him at the door. They waved good-bye to Sango and Miroku before heading down the street. Inuyasha watched as Kagome pulled out a cell phone and speed dialed Shippo. Shippo was number three on speed dial.

"What number is Miroku on your speed dial?"

Kagome held up five fingers as she said hello to Shippo over the phone. He mouthed the word 'Sango' and she held up four fingers. Kagome told Shippo to meet them at the arcade as Inuyasha pointed to himself. She shook her head at him and gave a laugh. Saying good-bye to Shippo she locked her phone and put it back in her purse.

"You don't even have a phone," she laughed.

"Odd…" Why wouldn't he have a phone? He checked his pockets. Nope, no phone.

"You're just a yell away anyhow," she reminded him.

And who else would I call? He tried remembering ever calling Miroku or Sango or Shippo. Had he ever even used a phone? He couldn't remember. He couldn't imagine needing to call anyone but Kagome, but since he was always with her… He froze in his spot, nearly causing Kagome to run into him.

"Kagome…" He made sure he had hold of her hand again, and hoped his wasn't as sweaty or as shaky as he thought it was. "Do you ever go hang out with Sango? You know… doing girl things?"

"Sure."

"Oh… like what?"

She tilted her head and thought about it for a moment. "Hmmm… Oh! Monday after school we went shoe shopping."

"Oh?"

"Uh huh. I bought these." She held her right sandaled foot in front of them and showed off her pretty new shoe.

Her right foot. The one that was severely twisted this morning. Where was the bandage? Where were the crutches? Why didn't he notice they were missing? And he couldn't recall a time on Monday that he wasn't with Kagome. When would she have had the time to go shopping without him knowing?

"Hey Shippo!" Kagome let go of his hand as she waved at their friend who appeared around the corner. "Over here!"

"Kagome!" The red head squealed and glomped on to the girl. Honestly, the kid acted like a child most of the time.

They each bought tokens for the video games. The loud noise and flashing lights were very disorienting. Twice Inuyasha lost sight of Kagome as they threaded their way through the crowd, each time pumped a gallon of adrenaline into his body as he tried not to panic. Eventually he took care of the problem by catching hold of her hand and refusing to let go.

The first game they played was a car racing game. The three of them were able to compete against each other. Inuyasha had hoped that the games would take his mind off of his disturbing thoughts. But the more he tried to not think about it, the more he thought about it. Shippo and Kagome teased him about coming in last place. He smiled and shrugged. He could hardly tell them that he was busy contemplating his existence to pay much attention to the driving simulation.

They chose a fighting game next. Shippo and Inuyasha played first. The winner, Inuyasha, played Kagome. The loser of that match, Kagome, played Shippo.

Inuyasha watched Kagome while she fought Shippo. Her arm would twitch when she threw a punch. Her leg would give a small jerk when her character kicked. When the character would draw an arrow and a bow would appear, Kagome's eyes would light up. She focused on the fight with an intensity he had never noticed before.

The fight ended, and by Kagome's victory dance he guessed she was the winner. He let her drag her to the dance pad. Now was the time to talk with Shippo. He grabbed the back of his friend's shirt before he could take off to the other dance station.

"Hey Shippo."

"Yeah?"

Inuyasha let go of his friend and stuffed his hands in his pocket. "What do you remember from when you were a kid? You know, before you met me and Kagome?"

Shippo grinned. "Life before Kagome?" He laughed. "No such thing."

"Seriously," Inuyasha brought his hands back out of his pocket and put them behind his back as he scuffed his shoe against the floor of the arcade. "What was life like before you came here?"

"I…I don't know." Shippo looked confused for a moment, then he smiled. "The past…"

"…is best forgotten." Inuyasha frowned as he watched Shippo scamper off. "I was afraid you'd say that."

He leaned back against the wall and watched as Kagome's feet moved. Looking his direction she threw him a devastating smile. He clenched his fists and felt like screaming. It was unfair. It was so unfair! He loved her!

What am I going to do? I can't lose her. I just can't. There had to be a way.

The walk home seemed shorter than usual. Kagome chatted happily, but he was too caught up in his own thoughts to remember what it was that she actually said. He waited until she closed the door before slumping down on the ground, his head falling to his knees. He kept his back to the door, suddenly worried that if he broke off the connection to her that he would disappear.

"I should go home," he told himself.

Only… he wasn't really sure where home was. He knew it was next door to Kagome. But which one? The only home he could picture in his head was Kagome's home. The only bedroom he could conjure was filled with pink colors and lace, definitely not his own. Everything in his life that didn't involve Kagome was a void.

"The hanyou isn't the dream…" he whispered hoarsely, "I am."

ooOOooOOooOOooOOooOOooOOoo

Author's Note:

Thanks for your reviews! It doesn't bother me when anyone points out a mistake, (I know that I don't always notice grammatical errors and spell check isn't all that reliable) just so long as they do it nicely. If not nicely, then at least not meanly.

Hope the story hasn't been tooooo confusing. It's not over yet though! Still a few more chapters to go.

In the beginning I said to give the story a chance even if you didn't like AU, but I didn't mean that this story WAS an AU…