Disclaimer: YU-GI-OH and all its RESPECTED characters and IDEAS BELONG to its rightful OWNER(s).
Chapter Two:
Welcome to Paradise
Yugi and Jonouchi's Plane...
"A'IGHT BITCHES! HAND OVER ALL YO' WALLETS FOO'S!" ,howled Bakura, holding up two machine guns, one in each hand.
"Yeah! Bitches!"
"No Ryou, we're the hostages, we don't do anything except look helpless. Which is something you usualy do anyways..."
"Oh... okay Otogi!"
"Er... yeah."
The Egyptian and his demented friend went around collecting wallets. Meric would get a kick out of the way he would snatch the money out of others' hands. Whenever he got a purse he would give Bakura a 'Yeah you know I'm cute, want some of this?' look while holding the purse in a girly pose. Bakura would suggestively nod and start to lick his guns. This was really starting to bother the fightened passengers. Malic just found it disturbing, since he couldn't help but want some of that fine peice of Meric as well...
"Alright I think that's all of it!" ,Malic reported to 'Captain Bakura'.
"Good, now take it all back to our ship the and we will take liftoff!"
"Aye, Aye, Captain!" ,Malic and Meric saluted as they turned to their duties.
"Oh Boys, you have to do the thing!" ,Bakura begged. Malic and Meric rolled their eyes to eachother and groaned.
"Crunchitize me Cap'n." ,sounding 'oh so excited'. Bakura giggled to himself, this was apparently giving him a warm, fuzzy feeling on the inside. Wierdo.
"Remember this day suckas!" ,Bakura bombarded the cieling with bullets while psychotically laughing. Meric and Malic had to come back and drag him to the ship, away from making too much of a scene. Everybody was silent, except for baby cries and a fiew voices saying 'Holy shit. I think we just saw Satan himself...'. The intercome then buzzed on, through the fuzz it gave its message...
"Our apologies, but we are suffering some... slight technical difficulties. Please remain calm."
"AHHH OH GAWD WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE AHHH!"
"it's okay Jonouchi! Calm down! I'm sure we're going to be-"
"THERE IS NO GAAAAWD! WE ARE ALL GOING TO PERISH!"
"Jonouchi, please cool it! We're going to be just f-"
(Ka-snap)
"Um, Yami, was knocking him out with the millenium puzzle really necessary?"
"Yes, Ibou. Very. And I have been wanting to do that for a very long time now..."
"Okay..."
After a very acrobatic landing by the inexperienced rookie-pilots, they decided this was the last time they where going to fly a plane. Especially since the top plane's hostages where dumped from the emergency cieling door, clutching eachother and crying.
"Oh Amelda-sir it was horrible!" ,Ryou ranted about it like a teenage girl after a day at the mall. Well,... a very traumitizeing day at the mall. Meanwhile, Raphael was supporting Otogi while he was resperating in a paper bag.
Evacuating the Plane...
Yami and Yugi struggled together to carry the unconcious Jonouchi out of the plane. The little, skrawny Japanese boy did not have the muscular endurance to withstand this much longer and lost grip. Yami triped from the sudden force of weight and also lost catch of Jonouchi. They both pethetically watched as Jonouchi's body tumbled down the stairs then landed on the small, unsuspecting target, Mokuba.
"Um... Sorry about that!" ,Yugi nervously yelled down to Kaiba, waving his hand. Kaiba just gave him a bitter stare as he kicked Jonouchi off of his little brother. He grabed Mokuba by the back collar like a mother rabbit to it's bunny and balanced his feet back on the ground. Mokuba rubbed his head and whined, but was inturupted by the large silver suitcase thrusted at his chest. Mokuba wobbled dizzily behind him as Seto made his usual cold-shoulder exit.
Yami and Yugi ran down the stairs, almost tripping over eachother as they raced to Jou's aid. Yugi leaned down to his side and shook at his limp friend.
"Oh Yami, what should we do?"
"Well after being robbed blind, there's only one thing we can do..."
"And... what is that Yami?"
"Simple little Yugi! ... Sell your body."
"(sob)"
Well, now was the time everybody was getting sittuated in their hotel rooms. Ryou and Otogi somewhat grouped together as they all where in the same bucket.
"Hey Otogi, don't you have a cell phone...?" ,Yugi asked.
"Huh? Oh yeah! I do!" ,Otogi perked up as the atmosphere suddenly felt optomistic from Yugi's cheerful voice. Reaching stylishly to his pocket, he sliped his hand in and out, flipping open the invisible cell phone to his ear, smerking at his smooth antics. Then it dawned on him there was no phone in his hand. He started to shuffle through his pockets, and frantically gave a self-cavity serch.
"Ah damn, where did my cell phone go?"
On 'Captain Bakura's Ship'...
"Hey... what is this thing?" ,Malic started to doddle with this strange, new contraption.
"Huh? Oh yeah I stole it from the drag queen!"
"Um... you mean Otogi, right Bakura?"
"Yeah Otogi, anyways, why don't you try pressing some buttons and see what happens..."
"Um... okay." ,Malic started to play with it, amused by the little beeping noises.
"Otogi...? Otogi-YumYums, is that you...?"
"IT... IT TALKED!" ,Malic screamed and let the phone slip from his fingers like a soapbar in a prison shower. The similar vision brought back bad memories with Rishid down in the caves while Isis was gone. But besides that, he was mostly in awe at the voice comeing from the little peice of cheaper metal.
"Hello? Is somebody there?"
"... H... hello..." ,Malic nervously waved at the phone sitting still on the floor.
"Oh, your not Otogi... he he, but you sound hot..."
"H... hot? Actualy I'm feeling quite cool..."
"Ooo! A feminine feline!" ,Bakura squeeled picking up the wierd speaking device as he started to talk with it. Malic watched as Bakura started to chuckle devilishly and talked about something in his pants that was twelve inches long. Malic was confused about what exactly was going on in their little conversation between the giggling and perverted french laughs. Meric on the other hand was getting agitated and snatched the phone away from Bakura.
"Hey! Me and that hooker are having an intricate conversation here!"
"If you don't stop being annoying I'm going to kill your little bitch!" ,Meric said with a hefty sigh as he handed the phone back to Bakura.
"NOOO! Not Ryou! And mine is better then yours!" ,He argued, throwing the phone at Malic's head. The phone then bounched out the window...
"Now look what you made me do!" ,Bakura whined as Meric laughed in pleasure at the fact of somebody else's frowning.
Back with the Group...
"Aww man, now we have to sell the millenium puzzle!" ,Ryou whined.
"NO WAY! This is not going anywhere!" ,Yami pouted his bottom lip and defensivly hugged the golden, upsidedown pyramid at his own grasps.
"Well we can't sell the ring! It's like my tracking device! It's hard to keep track of Bakura! And I tend to get lost a lot myself..." ,Ryou looked down at the ground, dissapointed in himself.
"OH GAWD! Send us a sign!" ,Otogi yalped, holding his palms in the air. Just to their suprise, a cell phone landed in his right hand.
"Oh... hey my cell..."
"Yeah I'd like to get in your pants, honey!"
"O.o" ,this remark suprised everyone.
"Uh... h-hello?' ,Otogi put the phone to his ear.
"Otogi dear? That you?"
"M-m-mom?" ,Otogi blushed as he turned the other way to wisper to the phone, "Why are you calling...?"
"Wait! Where'd your little friends go?"
"F-friends? What are you talking about?" ,Otogi was confused.
"Hey we're your friends!" ,Yugi argued.
"Oh shuttup! Too much Anzu for you!" ,Yami scolded the little one. Otogi then turned to everyone. The phone had not only cut out, but ran out of charge, not to mention Otogi refused to call long distance. "Hey! Look the millenium ring is happy!" ,Ryou giggled as everyone turned to his attention.
"Um... do you have to use that term...?" ,Otogi stated, along with all the others with sweatdrops on their heads. Even a little sweatdrop could be seen on the unconcious Jou.
"Uh... but thats what Bakura says! He says it's haveing an erec-"
"OKAY! We get it! Ryou, you really should stop repeating that guy, okay?" ,Otogi stoped him before he finished his sentence.
"Lets just follow it... " ,Yami led on the little circus parade of strange boys to their apparent destination, told by the millenium ring. They ran for a while, getting tired every once in a while and having to sit and rest.
"Damn, how far does that thing (huff) expect us to go?" ,Yugi whined, being one of the Jonouchi carriers. Otogi didn't want to help in worry that it was too ruff a job for his new, shiney manicure.
"Geez, Yugi... your talking a little different..." ,Otogi questioned.
"Yeah, whats it to you, (huff) bitch? Your not carrying a freaking fatass hound!" ,Yugi snaped back at Otogi. Otogi steped back a bit in fear.
"What? Can't handle it? BITCHES AND HOES! BITCHES AND HOES! BITCHES AND-" ,Yami had to halt Yugi's little lash.
"Um... he gets like that in P.E. sometimes... its a temper from the running they make him do in the show sometimes..." ,Yami weakly smiled, Otogi just nodded in understanding.
"Sometimes? Fucking sometimes? Thats all? Thats a fucking understandment you cockbite!" Yugi started to lash at Yami, Yami patting his back and avoiding being eaten alive. He evem had to snatch back his fingers from Yugi's nipping fangs. Yugi even started to glow red in the eyes, like in the Seal of Oricalcos series. After wiping the foam from Yugi's mouth they got back to running. Guess Yami forgot his rabie shots...
Finally the millenium ring calmed to normal, but like it mattered because they already discovered what they where being led to. They watched as Bakura triped out of the ship like a drunkard. Malic followed behind, only to be crushed by Meric, who wasn't paying attention to what he was doing because he was too busy trying to make an evil cackleing entrance.
"... What?" ,Bakura asked all who had they're jaws to the ground. Bakura looked back to see they crashed the plane into a parking lot, "Oh... about that..."
"Atleast they didn't hit our hotel..." ,Ryou sighed.
"Yeah it was hard to keep Meric from doing that... ",Bakura looked to the side stupidly, thinking the memory of struggles to himself.
"MOKUBA!" ,Kaiba cried out, running towards the scene. They saw a white flash of a speeding trenchcoat as he zipped past, but stoped only a few feet ahead and stared at the sight in misbelief.
"DAMNIT WOULD YOU PEOPLE STOP SQUISHING MY LITTLE BROTHER?" ,Kaiba snaped loudly with his head turned to the group.
"Heh, I knew Meric hit another roadkill! Whoo, he owe's me ten bucks!"
"GAWD DAMNIT YOU PEOPLE ARE PAINS IN THE ASSES!" ,Kaiba started to run towards the plane in hopes of uncovering Mokuba, but was halted in midstep by a mumble Yami said to Yugi.
"Damnit, I can't believe we're broke. If Kaiba ever finds that out it will be embaressing..."
"Say what...?" ,Kaiba turned back to them with a devilish smerk. The word 'money' apperently gives him sonic hearing.
"N-nothing!"
"You need some cash, dont you?"
"Shuttup Priest! What do you know?" ,Yami roared at Kaiba in shamed anger. Kaiba was going to laugh at them like the pethetic morsel's of beings they are, but then he noticed the unconcious Jonouchi.
"Hey, you gonna eat that?" ,he asked, pointing at Jou.
"Huh?" ,everybody poked one clentching eyelid open, confused that he missed his evil cackleing que.
"Uh... I mean, how about we make a deal?" ,Kaiba restructured his stylish posture.
"Why would we wanna make a deal with y-"
"Wait Yami! This... could be useful..." ,Otogi opened all ears.
"I'll buy that from you and in return, fresh cash!" ,Kaiba curled his slender fingers on the hitch of his hip.
"Uh... sure!" ,Yami handed over the mutt, but Yugi pulled back on him. He shook his head at Yami, but Yami gave back a lift of eyebrows, practically enforcing 'c'mon'. It was too bad for Yugi he already lost a lot of energy and his friend was snatched away from him. He eyes got watery, worried what this nemisis Kaiba would do to his best buddy. Which actually Jonouchi probably hated Yugi in secret. Who cares.
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Well that was exciting, no? Yay, second chapter. Sorry I didn't update sooner, I didn't think anybody was really reading this... Well thanks a lot for reading and tell me what you think!