Prison Break

Prison Break isn't mine sadly enough! I wish Michael was mine, or Lincoln! Aargh!

Anyway, this is just a short and kind of sad fic about Sara's thoughts. It's at the last episode. (before she is found ofcourse).

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Sara sat in her car and looked out the window. She was standing in front of her apartment but couldn't move. She didn't want to get out of her car. Not yet.

Her mind was too filled with things that had happened. With feelings.

Feelings she didn't want.

She sighed as she felt that feeling in her stomach again. She shook her head. She was so stupid. Am I that stupid ?Am I really? I thought I knew better now. I really thought I knew better.

A single tear left her right eye and slit it's way slowly down her cheeck.

Images of Michael Scofield ran through her head like a movie. She couldn't push them away. She managed to push those images away during day time, most of the time at least, but at night when she came home, and everything was silent, her mind would rattle on and on. It wouldn't stop.

She looked at her hands that were still on the steering wheel. And as she stared at one of her fingers she saw Michael and her in Fox River.

She saw him lying on the brancard in her room because of the burn he had on his back. She had been so worried. She had looked at him for a short while and again when she saw him like that, all she had wanted to do is touch him. She wanted to touch his skin, she wanted to feel his warmth, she wanted to pull him up in a hug. She wanted to take all of his pain away.

The next image already flashed through her mind, she saw Michael holding his foot in so much pain. Two of his toes were missing.

Sara narrowed her eyes at the painfilled face she could so clearly see in front of her again. That moment, yes, she had had it again.

Ofcourse, she felt for every prisoner who was hurt. She didn't want anyone to get hurt. But that nagging feeling from the inside, that feeling that every inch of her body wanted to reach out immediately and wanted to comfort him with her touch.

She sighed and turned her gaze away from her fingers towards the other window of her car. She sighed again.

She had tried to act normal towards Scofield. To act towards him like she acted towards every patient she got. Or con. She liked to refer to them as patients. That was a bit nicer.

But then, he just couldn't let her be. He just had to look at her with those eyes of his. And even when she tried to ignore that, he kept looking at her. Almost studying her every move.

Why couldn't he leave her alone? This wasn't right! She should have taken her distance a long time ago! Was she so weak? Was she so weak to see that he was getting too close?

She remembered his lips on hers and she hadn't pulled back. Yes, that was close. And it was wonderful. She breathed in deeply at that memory. It was so wonderful that she didn't have words for it, and she wanted more. She could feel his firm lips, so soft, so warm and so...Wanting. But he was a prisoner!

Her fingernails dug into her steering wheel.

She had scolded herself so many times. And she could already hear her fathers voice, or his reaction. Even when he wasn't around he was still in her head. Telling her what a failure she was.

And today...Well... Today had just proven that hadn't it? Maybe she was a failure. Maybe he was right and she couldn't get anything right.

A sarcastic voice in her head laughed at her and another tear began to make it's way down the same path it's predecessor had gone.

She clenched her teeth together in anger as she remembered that the only reason...No, she couldn't think about that. It hurt too much.

Her head was empty for a few seconds, she just felt the pain in her heart and body. Again, again she had let someone too close. And she was so angry! Michael Scofield had used her.

That bastard! Why else had he kissed her? Did she really think he was genuinly interested in her?

Yes. She did.

Admit it to yourself Tancredi. You did. You thought that he...That he...Well, he seemed so...Nice and different, and maybe he...

She shook her head quickly. She needed to ban those thoughts out. She could do that.

Say it to yourself Tancredi; The only reason that Michael kissed you wasbecause he wanted those keys.

The man you thought was different used you.

And you know what the worst part is? That you let yourself be used by him.

She shook her head and buried it in her hands. She didn't want to see it. She didn't want to face that raw reality.

You let yourself be used by a con who stepped over your feelings. And managed to hurt you.

If only she could turn back time. She would have reacted differently at Michael. She would have kept him away from her, at arms-length.

Will you wait for me? She heard him say

And tonight she had done something big. She wiped the tears away that were flowing freely now.

She had left the door open.

Open. For him.

Because somewhere, deep inside. It had felt right.

And now she felt as if she wasn't herself anymore. As if she had lost all control.

Ofcourse she almost had, she had almost grabbed that drink again.

Sara slowly climbed out of her car. It was late already. She would have an early start tomorrow again, at Fox River. And she would find out what had happened. Why Michael had wanted her to have the door unlocked.

She swallowed as she realised that Michael would be gone tomorrow. And she would still be there.

She would still be there...

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I can't wait for the next season to begin! AARGH! It takes SO long!

Anyway, I was so touched by the was Sara looked when she found out about the key, that Michael had taken it. (or Nika). She looked so hurt and I totally understood that! So I just wanted to write this, her thoughts.

Hope you liked it! Please review and let me know what you thought!