Elliot stopped pummeling the tree after 5 or so minutes as his body shook violently and he sunk down to the ground, taking a few ragged breaths as he examined his knuckles.
They're not to bad some gauze should be all I need, he decided in his head as he worked hard then on controlling his breathing as he felt a little lighter and less angry. The rage wasn't gone completely but he felt like he was safe to be around again and that was all he truly cared about.
Another 15 or so minutes passed by as he had now moved to sit on Cragen's porch swing as he was enjoying the fresh air when he heard a bloodcurdling scream from inside the house.
"L-Lewis g-get off me!! D-Don't h-hurt me...
E-Elliot p-please h-help me...
As Elliot quickly ran into the house her sleep terror evolved as the terror in her intensified "N-no n-no d-don't hurt him Lewis! N-no I-I'll do anything!!" she cried as Lewis then shot Elliot in the head in her terror as her screams turned into guttural sobs "Elliot please don't die... p-p-please d-don't d-die... N-n-no d-don't d-die I-I'll do anything!" she whaled as she leaped off the bed as Elliot entered the room having heard her screams "h-honey honey shhh, shhh, shhh, I'm alive baby, I'm alive and right here shhh..."
Olivia sadly didn't hear him , her brain still locked in the terror as she was breathing rapidly and kneeling down on the floor and punching it with her hands in a move that looked a lot like CPR "E-Elliot, E-El y-you have to stay with me, p-please come back to me," she cried through her rapid breaths as she never stopped the movement of her hands.
"Baby, baby I'm alive, I'm alive you've gotta wake up for me sweetheart please... y-your hurting your arm moving it like that..." Elliot said softly as he got closer to her and gently rubbed her back.
Olivia startled at the touch, her eyes opening and widening as she looked around for Elliot with tears in her eyes "E-Elliot... E-Elliot..." she cried.
"Honey I'm right here, I'm right here comere shhh, shhh, I'm alive, we're safe shhh," he soothed as he gently pulled her into his arms and she clung to him "E-Elliot i-it's really you... L-Lewis was trying to rape me a-and I cried for you to save me a-and you came i-in a-and he s-shot you a-and..."
Elliot nodded slightly as he gently swayed with her in his arms "shhh, shhh, I'm alive sweetheart, I promise you I am, I'm so sorry you dreamed that baby I-it wasn't real, it wasn't real, your safe now, we're both safe I promise," he soothed as he cont whispering soothing assurances in her ear until she calmed down.
After about 10 or so minutes the last of her tears dried "E-El I can't go back to sleep right now I-I just can't."
He nodded slightly "you don't have to baby, you don't have to," he said softly as he cont swaying for a few more minutes "honey can I lay you down on the bed? It'll only be for a few minutes I promise I just really need to tend to my hands really quick."
Olivia nodded quickly as she immediately grew concerned "d-did you hurt your hands El?"
He nodded slightly and chuckled "a little but it's nothing I haven't handled before," he said softly as he gently laid her down then grabbed the gauze and sat down on the bed.
Olivia frowned slightly "used to when you'd do this I would nurse them back to health for you, I wish I could do it for you today, I-I'm sorry that I can't."
Elliot shook his head slightly "no need to be sorry sweetheart," he said softly as he leaned over and gave her a gentle kiss on the forehead as she slightly nodded and sat her good hand on his knee "is this okay?" she asked.
Elliot smiled softly "yes of course," he said as after a few minutes he finished bandaging his knuckles as he then put some hand sanitizer on and started to gently rub her hand.
Olivia smiled slightly and relaxed at the contact "god I'm still so glad that your alive the dream felt so real..."
He nodded slightly "I know it did baby, I know I wish there was something I could do to keep them from happening."
She nodded slightly "I wish I knew how to stop yours too," she said as they went into a comfortable silence then as they kept a gentle grasp on each others hand, both drawing comfort from the other.
Around 30 minutes passed before Olivia slowly sat up as she grabbed the wash cloth that had been around her neck earlier that morning "I'll be right back El," she said as she stood up.
He nodded his head "do you need any help honey? Or for me to do anything?"
She slightly shook her head "I wanna try on my own first, do you need any Advil for your hands while I'm up?"
Elliot sighed slightly, feeling a mixture of frustration at her pushing herself so hard so soon and admiration of her willpower and strength "I could use some yeah but only if you can get it with no trouble I don't mind getting it for myself."
She nodded slightly "I'll let you know if I need any help El I promise," she said noticing the hesitancy in his expression.
He nodded slightly "a-alright," he said still hesitant but trusting her word and not wanting to treat her like anything other than his equal as he stayed put but didn't relax as he waited for her to call for him.
Olivia slightly smiled as she was slow and careful as she headed to the restroom first, quickly doing her business as she then washed her good hand the best she could then opened Cragen's medicine cabinet as after a minute she found the Advil as she got the bottle out with some perseverance "here you go El," she said handing it to him after walking back to the room.
"Thank you sweetheart," he said softly as he opened it and took 2 tablets as he then stood up to take the bottle back "I can do it El I've still gotta make an icepack for my shoulder it's been hurting since that nightmare or whatever it was.."
Elliot nodded slightly "you were doing CPR on the floor I think you thought I was laying on it. Honey please let me make it for you, this taking care of each other thing we do? It works both ways."
Olivia nodded slightly and handed him the rag "o-okay," she said softly as she got back on the bed and laid down as Elliot slightly smiled and kissed her head then left the room.
A few minutes later the ice pack was on Olivia's shoulder and they laid together cuddling close "El you ready to go through the rest of the stuff in the bag?" Olivia asked when she noticed she was getting close to falling asleep again.
Elliot sighed slightly "are you sure you wanna do this baby? I don't know what all's in it and I don't want anything in there to trigger you."
She nodded slightly "r-right now I feel safe and I don't wanna fall asleep and dream again about your death so now's as good a time as any right?"
Elliot nodded "I suppose so," he said softly as he pulled the bag into his lap and reached inside it, pulling out his pillow and immediately seeing the bight marks on the case "did he gag you with this?" he asked softly.
Olivia shook her head slightly "I-I wanted it closer to me and that was the only way I knew how to make that happen."
Elliot nodded slightly and rubbed her back as he pulled the pillow case off with his other hand and tossed it aside "do you wanna keep this pillow or toss it?"
Olivia thought for a minute "I-I think we can keep it if we replace the case."
Elliot nodded slightly "alright," he said softly as he then pulled the rag out of the bag as he didn't even ask about it, just tossed it onto the floor along with the pillowcase "there's not to much left in here I figure they haven't processed every thing yet," he said as he then pulled out his dream diary, his face growing pale "oh god... I hope nobody read this..."
Olivia sighed slightly wanting to provide him with some comfort but also knowing she couldn't lie "I-I saw it out and open while I was cuffed to the bed, I-I don't know how much he read of it I tried not to really look at it.."
Elliot sighed slightly "I don't really care what that animal thinks of me it's the CSU techs I'm worried about. W-What if they think I would act on that dream? What if..."
Olivia gently rubbed his back as she cut him off "honey if they thought that Cassidy wouldn't have just dropped the stuff off and left, more than likely they didn't read it at all, they probably just dusted it for prints then when they found nothing put it aside and moved on and even if they did read it Elliot it's not like you shot me in cold blood in that dream."
He nodded slightly "true," he said as he put it in the keep pile then sighed "baby we're to the metal stuff now do you wanna stop?"
She slightly shook her head "we're not around the stove right now so it's okay," she said as he slightly nodded and started gently strumming his fingers through her hair with 1 hand as he slowly pulled the spare key out of the bag with his other one "I wonder how the hell he got a hold of this?" Elliot mused aloud.
"I-I have no idea," Olivia said as she kept her eyes focused off it and on him instead as she focused on the feel of his fingers in her hair.
Elliot noticed how hard she was trying to focus on his face as he carefully sat the key down, relieved that the CSU techs had at least cleaned her blood off it as he gently strummed his other hand into her hair as she tensed slightly at first "shhh, easy honey it's okay my hands empty feel?" he said softly as he gently spread his fingers out to prove he wasn't holding anything as she slightly smiled and relaxed again.
"That's it baby your safe," he soothed as he then removed a hand and silently went through the bag again as he pulled her phone out then moved the bag away "I think this is enough for now," he said softly as she nodded her head slightly in agreement while he plugged her phone into his charger and waited for it to turn on.
Pretty soon the phone lit up as over 60 notifications came through from all sorts of people "do you wanna call any of these people back? Or have me text anything to them?"
Olivia shook her head slightly "not really as long as Fin, Munch and Amaro know that I'm okay that's all I really care about."
Elliot nodded slightly "I'll send a message to Amaro and Fin, Munch'll see us later so you guys can talk then."
She nodded her head slightly and yawned as she laid her head over his heart "is this okay?"
Elliot smiled "of course sweetheart and honey you never have to ask," he said softly as he declined a call on her phone from a number he didn't know and that wasn't in her contacts as he then typed out the following group message to Fin and Amaro.
This is Elliot, am typing this out for Liv, she wants you to know that she's doing okay, its gonna be a long hard road but she's gonna get through this. I want you both to know that I'm sorry you were both suspended, Tuckers an asshole I dealt with him for years. What you guys both did for us though meant and means the world, I'm sorry I acted like such a dick too, Amaro I'm not usually like that I promise. Maybe in a few days once things are looking a little better we can have you 2, Munch and Cragen over for drinks. Take care, Liv and El, he sent as the same phone number from before called again and Elliot declined it again as Liv slept soundly on his chest, unable to fight it anymore.
The third time the number called Elliot sighed heavily "Olivia Stabler's phone," he answered.
"H-Hi, h-hi I-is Olivia Benson there?"
Elliot sighed "she's not available right now can I help you?"
"I-I really need to talk to her, t-this is an emergency a-and she said I could call her at this number anytime.."
Elliot sighed getting the feeling that this was a victim from 1 of her cases "I'm sorry she's not available right now but I'm her husband can you tell me what's wrong?"
"I-It's my ex boyfriend D'angelo h-he posted his bail this morning a-and h-he's standing outside of my apartment watching me through my window. I-I really need her to help me please..."
Elliot sighed "do you have a restraining order?"
"Y-y-yes," she cried in fear.
Elliot nodded "okay sweetie, listen Olivia's not available right now so I need you to hang up with me and dial 911."
"N-No no no no I-I can't hang up! I-I can't hang up I-I need Olivia to help me!" she cried as Olivia stirred slightly on his chest and he gently stroked her hair "shhhh, shhh, shhh I need you to calm down sweetie and lower your voice, I'm gonna get you some help but you've gotta listen to me and stay calm okay?"
"W-What's going on?" Olivia asked groggily as the victim on the phone gave her understanding through sniffles.
Elliot sighed in slight relief as he leaned into Olivia's ear "it's a victim from 1 of your cases I think, apparently her boyfriend D'angelo got out on bail today and is staring at her through her apartment window," he whispered as Olivia nodded slightly "h-her name's Lory, s-she was raped the other day by him, she caught him in bed with her sister, he raped her as revenge for breaking it off."
Elliot slightly nodded as Lory started to panic "a-a-are you s-still there?"
"Yes Lory I'm still here I need you to get away from your window and out of his line of sight if you can."
"O-Okay.. I-Is Olivia there now? C-Can I talk to her?"
"Sweetie she's not up to talking right now but I did the job right along side her for a long time so I need you to just trust me okay?"
"O-okay," she said hesitantly as Elliot slightly smiled "tell me when your away from the window okay?"
"I-I'm away from it," she said after a minute as Elliot nodded "great now I need you to hang up with me and dial 911 so they can send someone to help you."
"I-I can't hang up though, I-I-I just can't."
He sighed "Lory sweetie it's okay you can hang up the dispatcher will stay on the line with you until help arrives," he said as he noticed Olivia grimacing and trying to massage the ache out of her shoulder as he gently took over for her with his free hand "Ive got it sweetheart," he whispered softly.
"Y-you promise they will?" she asked hesitantly.
"Yes Lory, yes I promise," he said reassuringly.
"O-Okay t-thank you for helping me, c-can Olivia take my statement?"
Have you not seen the damn news? Elliot thought to himself as he exhaled slowly "I'm sorry but no she can't, you take care okay? Your gonna be alright, 911 and the responding police officers will help you."
"O-Okay t-thank you," she said as she quickly hung up and Elliot laid the phone down "poor woman," he said softly.
Olivia nodded slightly "I-I should have spoken with her, I-I should have told you it was okay to give me the phone."
Elliot shook his head slightly "baby you have a big heart and I love that about you but right now your not in the shape to help victims, if she had seen the news she would have known that."
She nodded slightly "y-your right but I still should have tried, I-I feel like I let her down."
"You didn't baby, you didn't I promise she's still gonna get the help she needs."
She nodded slightly "I hope so," she said as she breathed in like she was gonna say something else but then changed her mind as she snuggled closer to him "how's your shoulder feeling?" he asked softly.
"It still hurts," she said deciding to just be honest with him, shocked at his uncanny ability to be able to read her mind as he nodded his head "I think we should try putting some heat on it."
She nodded slightly "I-I guess so but not to hot please..."
Elliot nodded understanding her valid fear of hot things "don't worry baby I'm just gonna use the heating pad that Cragen bought and we'll start at a low setting, I won't let anything burn you I promise."
She nodded slightly "I trust you Elliot."
He smiled slightly "I'm glad sweetheart," he said as he eased up and grabbed the heating pad from off the dresser and plugged it in as he gently positioned it on her shoulder then turned it to the lowest setting "how's this?" he asked softly as he cuddled back beside her.
"It's okay, it could maybe be a little warmer."
Elliot nodded slightly and turned it up a notch with the remote control "mmmm," Olivia moaned.
"To hot?" Elliot asked softly.
Olivia shook her head slightly "no El it's perfect," she said with a small smile.
Elliot nodded "good I'm glad," he said as he kissed the top of her head gently "let me know when you want that off okay and I'll take it off you, this is about you being comfortable nothing else."
She nodded slightly "your to good to me you know that?"
He smiled slightly and shook his head "honey you help others so much you deserve to have someone look after you every once and a while."
She smiled slightly "so do you El, so do you and once my wrist is healed I intend to do that very thing."
He smiled slightly "that means a lot you know you don't have to though right?"
Olivia nodded slightly "yeah I know, I want to though hey El are you hungry? You didn't eat much breakfast."
He smiled slightly "well neither did you," he said playfully as his face then grew serious "I'm fine baby I promise."
She smiled slightly "I know your fine El but you can still be hungry and fine too."
He chuckled slightly "I guess your right what were you thinking of for lunch?"
She smiled slightly "maybe we could get some Chinese takeout? We haven't had it in a while and I should be able to drink the egg drop soup from a straw."
He nodded "that sounds good sweetheart, I'll order our regular too that way if we decide we wanna share we can."
She nodded with a smile "sounds good to me El," she said as he smiled, nodded and placed the order it should be about 20 minutes," he said once he hung up.
Olivia smiled slightly and nodded her head as Elliot's phone rang "damn i wish people would just leave us alone honey," he said as he glanced at the caller ID and sighed when he read the words car garage "Stabler," he answered.
"Hi is this Elliot J Stabler?" the man asked.
"Yes this is him."
He nodded "great, my name is Jonathan Williams I'm calling from Hank's auto repair, I wanted to let you know that your 2008 Ford f150's computer has been repaired and the truck is ready to be picked up."
Elliot sighed "that's great to here but I'm not able to pick it up today I probably can tomorrow."
Jonathan nodded "that's fine sir but for every extra day it sits here 50 dollars will be added to your bill and your auto insurance won't pay it."
Elliot sighed heavily "I'll figure something out can someone pick it up besides me?"
"Yes sir that's fine but we don't have your keys so you'll have to get them to them."
Elliot nodded "I'll take care of that, someone will be after it shortly, have a great day," he said as he hung up.
"Every thing okay?" Olivia asked.
Elliot nodded "yeah they fixed the truck apparently something was wrong with the computer."
Olivia frowned "that's strange."
Elliot nodded "yeah it is, I think Lewis was the 1 behind it but weather SVU can prove it? Who knows."
She nodded slightly "did they figure out how he got in our house?"
He sighed "they didn't baby but they did find his urine on our hall closet floor so my guess is he snuck in at some point when the door was unlocked, probably while we ate at the picnic table."
She sighed slightly "y-your probably right El, h-how are we gonna feel safe there again? Because right now I'm not seeing a way how."
He sighed slightly and gently rubbed her back "I really don't know sweetheart we're probably gonna need some time to process before we go back there again. I do know this though I'll be putting in a security system with motion detectors."
She nodded slightly "that's a good idea, we can't turn the house into fort knocks either though that would scare Izzabella and the kids from the neighborhood."
He nodded slightly "true, when the time's right we'll look at all our options together sound good?"
Olivia nodded "that sounds great to me El," she said as his phone rang again "it's Maureen she must have made it into town," he said as he then put it to his ear "Stabler."
"Hey dad it's me, how are you guys doing?"
"We're hanging in there honey you?"
"Same same, me and Carl have been helping paint 1 of our friends houses, she got a good deal on it but all the walls were grey so we figured we'd help her liven it up a bit."
Elliot smiled "that's great honey it really is, Carl is a good man have you guys picked your wedding date yet? Me, Liv and Izzabella will be there we just have to know when."
She shook her head "we haven't yet dad all we know is it'll be next year sometime, hey how bad of shape is your house in? We need to know what we've gotten ourselves into."
He sighed "most every thing was left untouched the living room, dining room etc, the hall closets gotta be cleaned though, stove replaced, some dry wall in the bedroom will have to be replaced, our bedroom suit too, I'll be giving you the money for that. Also last I saw there were clothes in the bedroom floor and a couple things had been turned over. I'm sure it's worse now though CSU is bad about making rooms look like tornados went through them once they're done."
Maureen nodded "good to know, how long do you think we'll have to get every thing done before your ready to move back inn?"
Elliot sighed "I have no idea but it'll probably be a while, after what Liv went through in there I'm not rushing her into anything."
She nodded "that's completely understandable, we're in Manhattan now where are you guys staying? Kathleen said you weren't at grandma Bernies."
Elliot nodded "yeah we're not there right now we'll be going over there probably either tomorrow or Sunday depending, we're actually in Manhattan we're at captain Cragen's house."
"Ah okay, well if you need anything before we head to Jersey let me know."
Elliot nodded "there is one thing I could use your help with if you don't mind," he said as once he explained about the truck and they agreed to pick it up for him they ended the call.
"Your kids are amazing El," Olivia said softly amazed by Maureen's generosity.
He nodded "yeah most of them are I just wish Dickie would come around."
She nodded slightly "me too El, me too maybe he will in time?"
He sighed "how much time does he need though Liv me and you have been together for 8 years that hasn't changed and the whole thing with Shane and the army was 4 years ago. He enlisted anyway for god sakes you'd think he would at least have reached out after this."
She sighed slightly and nodded "true but if he's deployed right now he might not even know."
He nodded "true, best to just be grateful for the 4 amazing kids that are still speaking to us, it just hurts," he said as he cleared his throat slightly and took a deep breath to reign in his emotions and turned the volume on the tv up slightly.
"I know it does," Olivia said softly as she rubbed his back for a minute with her right hand as she then reached out for the remote to the heating pad "whatcha need honey?" Elliot asked noticing her reaching out.
"Can you turn the heating pad off?" she asked.
Elliot nodded "of course sweetheart," he said softly as as soon as the heating pad was off her shoulders the doorbell rang.
A/n: they'll be giving their statements next chapter.