Litanya: Here is the next chapter. I don't own Digimon. I'm too tired to say much else.

The Island Holiday

Chapter 4: Pretending

Sora was very happy that they had a personal tour guide for their trip, but she found that Catherine was very… irritating. It was the day after their trip to the Louvre and they had spent the morning on the river Seine, with Catherine pointing out the famous buildings along the river's banks. The trio was now heading towards a fun-fair that Catherine knew about. As they traveled, Sora tried to find out what exactly she hated about the French girl. Catherine was happily chatting to Tai about something, speaking half in Japanese and half in French. Tai was responding to her in Japanese, so Sora knew that they were talking about some girl who had gone to Odaiba High, but she couldn't understand exactly what Catherine was saying. That irritated her a little, but it wasn't that which caused her peculiar feelings toward Catherine. She had thought that it could have been that at first, but Tai had been translating for her most of the time- his claims that he knew only simple French were now ignored as she knew that they weren't true- and so she knew that this communication problem was not the main problem. Sora watched her two companions as they walked along. Catherine was explaining something excitedly to Tai- this time in full French- and he was listening attentively, and interrupting her with questions when she paused. They weren't ignoring Sora; they were just too caught up in their own conversation. And they both looked very content to keep their conversation going. It was then that she realised what was wrong with her. She was jealous of Catherine. Before Catherine had come along, she had been the only female who had actually tried to understand Tai and become close friends with him. That excluded his sister Kari of course. But when Catherine had come along, Tai had had someone other than Sora to turn to. Of course he always had had Matt, Kari and the other digidestined as well, but before Catherine he had almost always talked to Sora about his problems. But since Catherine had come along he had closed up and as a result Sora felt that she did not know him as much anymore. Now Catherine knew him better than she did, and it really irritated her.

"Uh Sora… are you okay?" she realised with a start that they had arrived at their destination, and that Tai had disappeared. Catherine was looking at her with a slightly concerned expression. Sora smiled to try to reassure her that she was okay.

"Yeah, I was just lost in thought for a second there. Where's Tai?" Catherine raised an eyebrow.

"You must have been lost in thought if you did not hear Tai tell you that he was going to get our tickets. The line is pretty long so he might be a while. Do you want to talk about what is on your mind? It seems to be uh… bothering you… a lot," she stumbled a little over the big words, but she managed to say what she wanted to and Sora smiled at her achievement.

"It's kind of complicated. How do you know Tai so well? I thought that you two had a messy break-up," she hadn't meant to say that. It was a little too close to the topic which she had been thinking about, and she had wanted to get her mind off of that topic. But she couldn't take it back now.

"Uh… I would not think that what you mean by 'messy' really applies here. I did uh… dislike Tai for a while but I still kept in contact with him. I sent him e-mails in which I told him I hated him and stuff but I did not really mean it. He would send me e-mails with apologies in them- although it was not really his fault- and so we kept in touch. But I knew him from when I was in Japan and he has not really changed. You know him better than I know him- you just do not realise this yet. You know him better than anyone and you will always know him better, although some of us may wish that we knew him like you do," Sora was confused. She didn't really understand how she knew Tai the best, but she knew what Catherine meant by her last phrase. And she did not like it.

'Why can't I just be happy for the two of them? They are obviously very close and I will be surprised if they are not a couple by the end of this holiday. They both appear to care for each other so much… so why do I feel as though something is wrong? Why do I feel as though something is being stolen from my heart? Tai is my best friend. I love Matt. Tai getting a girlfriend should not get to me. He's probably had hundreds of girlfriends and it hasn't bothered me before. So why now?' she found that she couldn't answer that question, so she made up an excuse, 'It's just because I miss Matt and seeing these two patch up their relationship is making me miss him more. That's why I hate them becoming close. And being in 'the city of love' really doesn't help. But that is all there is to it. I just miss Matt.' But even as she convinced herself that was the reason, she knew that it was wrong. She had no idea what was really bothering her, but she put all thoughts of it out of her head.

"I'm not sure what you mean. You seem to know Tai a lot more than I do at the present time. Anyway, here he comes with the tickets. The line wasn't as long as it looked," Catherine turned to see that Tai was indeed returning with the tickets. But the line was still as long as it had been when he had joined it.

"How did you get those tickets so quickly? Catherine demanded to know. Some of the people still in the line had been waiting when the trio had arrived at the fair. Tai just shrugged and grinned.

"There was another line over there for tourists, but the sign was partially obscured by the French flag, so I think that people thought that it was a line for French locals. As a result the line was short and so I could get the tickets," he explained as he handed the girls a ticket each, "Besides, did you really think that I was going to stand in a line for half an hour whilst you two just stood here?" Sora knew that he had cut the line somehow. There was no flag in sight, and so he must have pushed in front of someone. But they had the tickets now and as no one was rushing after them screaming about disregarding the rules, she felt that they were safe. Besides, she wanted to ride on the rides. So she kept silent and followed Tai and Catherine into the fair, her thoughts now dwelling on what ride she could persuade Tai to go on with her…

Matt unlocked the door to his apartment- well; it was technically his father's apartment- and walked in, sighing with relief as he realized he was home. He had spent the day in a meeting with the record company all day and he just wanted to sit in a chair and watch his favourite shows. He wanted to do anything but think about music. He loved music, but listening to it now would only make him think about record deals and after the meetings that day, deals were the last things that he wanted to think about. He was about to turn the television on and relax when the phone rang. His eyes automatically went to his watch. It was too early for Sora to be calling him and he seriously considered letting the answer machine pick up. But the ringing of the phone was also starting to get to him. He tossed his television remote onto the couch and picked the phone up with the intention of telling whoever was on the other end that he was busy.

"Hey Matt, how are you?" it was T.K. He couldn't hang up on his little brother. He eyed the television a little wistfully before he walked out of the room and into the kitchen so that he wouldn't be tempted to turn on a show.

"I'm just a little tired from today's meeting, but other than that I'm fine. How are you? Did you pass that test that you told me about the other day?" he sat down at the kitchen table and began drawing patterns on a piece of paper that was lying in front of him. For some reason he always had trouble staying still when he was on the phone.

"Yeah, I passed, but not by much. I was lucky that Ken had helped me study for this one otherwise I would have failed. I uh… I actually called because I have a question and I know that you can help me because you were in a similar situation as I am," T.K sounded very nervous, and he had an idea why. He didn't really know if he could help, but he would try.

"Well ask away and I'll help you if I can," there was a pause before T.K answered. Matt almost laughed, but then again, he would have done the same if he had been in T.K's position. It was always hard to bring up the topic of love with a sibling, whether it was older or younger.

"Well… you see… IwanttoaskKarionadateandIdon'tknowwhattodo," Matt blinked. He had vaguely understood what that sentence was, but he wasn't completely sure that he had heard it right.

"So you want to ask Kari out and you don't know what to do, right? Just ask her. She won't bite you."

"I know. I am pretty sure that she will say yes, but there is the problem of Davis," now Matt was confused. T.K had said that he had been a similar situation, but he had been able to ask Sora out with no problems. He didn't know anyone who claimed to love Sora, so it was all okay. T.K's situation was not as black and white as his had been, and he didn't really know what advice to give.

"I have no idea what you should do about Davis," he could almost see the confused expression on T.K's face through the silence that followed. What was T.K so puzzled about?

"But you had a similar situation. How did you handle the fact that Tai also cared for Sora? You must have done something," it was Matt's turn to be confused. He hadn't done anything about Tai. Tai's feelings had been irrelevant- he only cared for Sora as a best friend, and so it had been okay for Matt to ask her out. And Tai had never said anything to challenge that.

"What do you mean? Tai is her best friend, so my situation is completely different to yours."

"But Tai was in love with Sora and so our situations are similar. Did Tai just give up on his feelings because you were dating Sora, or because you talked to him, or was it just because he fell out of love with her? I need to know so I can figure out how to deal with Davis," Matt felt as though his world had been turned upside down. Since when had Tai been in love with Sora? He hadn't breathed a word about it to Matt, and he hadn't acted differently towards Sora at all. Matt was sure that his younger brother was wrong.

"I think that you have your wires crossed or something… Tai has never been in love with Sora, and I did talk with him about asking Sora out before I asked her, but I never had to compete with him for her, because he didn't want a relationship with her," Tai would have said something if he had been in love with Sora, wouldn't he? Tai was loud and confident- sometimes too confident- and he would have voiced his feelings without a second thought if he had had any. But he had said nothing. And to Matt, that meant that Tai had not minded at all.

"But Kari said… uh… never mind. Anyway, I'd better go and call Kari. I guess that I will deal with Davis the way that you unknowingly dealt with Tai. I'll talk to you later," and he hung up without letting Matt get a chance to speak. If Kari had said that Tai was in love with Sora then… Matt shook his head to get those thoughts out of his mind. T.K had been wrong. That could be the only reason for it. There was no way that he would have missed noticing that Tai was in love with Sora. He walked back into the living room and jumped onto the couch. His favourite show was on and he needed to escape reality for a while. Life was just too damn confusing at times.

"…you accidentally told Matt that my brother was in love with Sora? How could you do that? I told you not to tell anyone!" T.K cringed as his girlfriend grew angry. He had thought that Matt had known about Tai's feelings, but obviously he had been wrong.

"Well how was I supposed to know that Matt didn't know? With the way that the three of them were acting, I thought that Matt and Tai had talked it out or something. Tai's feelings were so obvious that you would have had to be on the moon to miss them. I thought that my brother was more observant than that," he truly had thought that. Matt normally noticed these things and that was part of the reason why his band was so popular. Matt had a great talent for expressing feelings, and he had written songs that he had based on his own feelings, and the feelings of those around him. T.K was sure that one of Matt's songs had been based on Kari and himself- it was about young love that was so obvious and happy- and so he knew that Matt understood his friends and their emotions. So why had he missed the fact that Tai loved Sora?

"I think that Matt missed it because he didn't want it to be true. I think that if he searches himself, deep down he knows that Tai loves her. But because he loves her, he wants to ignore that because he also treasures his friendship with Tai. I read about a similar case somewhere on the internet. Two best friends liked the same girl. One of the guys mentioned his 'love' first, and the other stayed quiet. The first guy ended up having a relationship with the girl, but after a few years they broke up. The two best friends remained best friends, but their friendship seemed to strengthen after the couple broke up. It was then that the first guy realized that his friend also loved the girl. The second guy ended up marrying the girl, but the important thing is that the first guy realized that he had known about his friend's feelings the whole time- he had just refused to recognize that he knew. It's a very complicated situation, and I hate having to watch Tai deal with it. He needs his own happiness," T.K felt really bad. It was because of his brother that her brother could not be happy. He felt torn between the two of them. After all, in the Digital World, he had asked Tai to be his brother too.

"Wasn't Tai really close to Catherine? They dated for a while didn't they? I thought that he was in love with her," he tried to cheer her up, but he knew that it wouldn't work. She worried about Tai almost as much as Tai worried about her. And Tai's relationship with Catherine hadn't worked out. But Catherine lived in Paris, so maybe they would meet up again and solve the problems they had had…

"No, he never loved her. That's the reason why they broke up. She figured out that he loved someone else. I don't know if she realized that he loved Sora, but she knew that he didn't love her, despite his protests. He told me that he felt really evil after every date that he had with Catherine, because he lied to her so much. When they broke up she was so angry with him… most of her e-mails were spent saying how much she hated him. No, he has to find someone else. A relationship with Catherine just wouldn't work…"

"Go Tai! I know that you can get this shot!" Catherine called out encouragingly from his side. He was at a games booth at the fair. It was a basketball throw, and if he shot a goal he would win a giant bear. He personally didn't want a giant bear, but Catherine did, and so he found that he wanted to try and get it for her. He had learnt several things that morning. The first thing that he had learned was, sadly, that Sora was still in love with Matt. The second thing that he had learnt was that he had decided to move on, despite his heart's protests that he was in love with Sora. The third thing he had discovered was that Catherine was really fun to be around. Okay, so he had learnt that when he had dated her, but it had been reinforced that morning. She understood him; she understood what he was going through. And she wanted to help. She was also very beautiful. He didn't know if he was 'falling for her,' but being with her definitely lessened the hurt he felt from knowing that Sora loved Matt.

"He's going to miss. Basketball isn't his sport," Sora commented calmly from her position next to the excited Catherine. He poked his tongue out at her before turning back to the ring. All he had to do was get the ball through the ring, and then Catherine would be happy. And Sora would be wrong. That last point seemed almost as important as the first. He knew that it was petty, but he couldn't help it. She was hurting him without realizing it, and he could never let her know that it was happening. All he had to do was concentrate, just like he did with soccer. He just had to hold his wrist correctly and visualize the ball going through the hoop and-

"Yay! I knew that you could do it Tai!" Catherine squealed excitedly before giving him a hug. As Catherine continued to jump around and squeal- Sora had told her to calm down but she wouldn't- Tai collected his prize and passed it to her.

"Here you go, I got this for you," he handed her a pink flower-like soft toy that he had seen her eyeing up when they were looking at the prizes that he could win. Her eyes softened and she stopped jumping around for a second.

"Thank you. How did you know that I wanted this one?" he just laughed and winked.

"I guess that we just have a special connection or something," he knew that he was flirting with her a lot, but he wasn't sure if it was to make Sora jealous or because he truly liked Catherine. It didn't help that she always flirted back.

"I'm going to go and get a drink. I'll be back in a few minutes," Sora said loudly. He jumped. He had almost forgotten that she was there. Almost. Catherine smiled up at him for a second.

"Why did we break up? I mean… I remember the reason, but we are both hurting because the ones we love do not love us. Well… you love Sora, but she doesn't love you, and I love you and you don't love me. But we could pretend, couldn't we? It's better than being alone," it was true, and that was what Tai hated. He hated the fact that Sora wasn't in love with him, and he hated the fact that he was causing Catherine pain because he couldn't 'love' her. So he said what he felt was the only thing he could say.

"I don't see why not…"

To be continued…

Litanya: I am sorry that this is so late and relatively short. Uni is taking up more energy than I though it would and so I haven't had much time to write. And I have too many other commitments. Anyway, I hope that you enjoyed this and please review.