Happy Sunday! Time for a new chapter. Thanks for your reviews, as usual. And, don't worry, the last chapter will have comfort to balance out the mess I've created in this chapter – as well as the boys actually talking to each other. In this house, we acknowledge our emotions :)

Chapter 12

Summoning rituals were all quite similar. There were markings to be drawn to make sure you trapped the thing you summoned. There were objects and sometimes fire, sometimes holy water. At times, the blood of the summoner was also required.

"This is so I'll establish a relationship between Cerberus and myself," Sam explained to Blair as they got what they needed from the trunk of the Impala.

Blair was eyeing the car warily.

"Best not tell Jim you've got all that arsenal in there."

Sam smirked.

"Yeah, when cops usually see that, it's when the awkward questions start."

They had left Jim and Dean at the crypt, which was a good thing as Sam was getting really tired of Dean's loaded glances. Moira was still in the back, unconscious.

"Jim's right in a way," Blair said, glancing at her. "We've got no proof she's been doing all this. We might not be able to send her to jail. And if she's free, she can always come up with another plan. And another and another."

Sam nodded.

"Probably. So, what are you saying?"

Blair shrugged.

"I don't know. I want to see her as someone who could change. Who was just caught in the wrong circumstances. I want to give her a chance, but every bone in my body says I'm being naïve. I have no idea what to do, man. But I feel like Moira's my responsibility."

"Why?" Sam pressed. "Because she's a Guide? How does that work anyway? It's like saying I should feel responsible for every other Hunter out there. You can't. They're not you."

Blair grimaced.

"A while ago, before drowning and all that Jim's old mentor passed the way of the shaman to me. Now, all I knew until then about shamanistic practices was strictly academic. The methods, the reasons, but not the soul. But if I really am that – then I've got to have the soul too, right?"

Sam nodded.

"I suppose. What's that got to do with Moira?"

"It feels as if I was supposed to guide her too. Help her cope."

Sam rolled his eyes.

"And they say Dean and me are good at guilt trips."

Blair snorted.

"Maybe that's why we're work so well together. We're all a bunch of perfectionists with conscience issues. The four of us."

Sam supposed he had been described in worse terms. He indicated to Blair that they should start heading back to the crypt.

"I've been thinking," Blair said and Sam already knew he was not going to like what was coming. "Maybe I should be in there with you."

Of course you do.

"Sandburg, could you tell me why you're so eager for a face to face with Cerberus?"

Blair raised his hands in a defensive position.

"Hey, I'm really not. I mean, I like dogs, but only from a distance and only when they're not thousands of years old and guard the gates of hell."

"Not exactly hell," Sam corrected. "So, if you don't want to be close to it, why are you suggesting you come with me?"

Blair shrugged.

"I mean, this is about me, isn't it?"

Right, Sam thought. Guilt issues.

"I think it's fine if you let me handle it. I've got enough keeping Dean in line without having to worry about you."

Blair didn't look too convinced.

"I mean, I know it's more of a title than anything, but I am a shaman. I could help. You might need me."

"I do," Sam said. "Outside the crypt, in case Cerberus gets the better of me. And I'm gonna need a favor, Blair."

Blair nodded eagerly.

"You've got it."

Sam knew the enthusiasm was going to wane once Sandburg found out what Sam actually wanted from him.

"If it looks like I'm not gonna make it out of there – shut the door."

Blair stopped in his tracks. He gaped at him in horror.

"Wait, that would mean…"

Sam nodded curtly.

"Locking me inside with Cerberus. Believe me, I know."

Blair shook his head.

"Sam, you can't ask me…"

"Who else am I gonna ask?" Sam shot. "Dean? He wouldn't go through with it."

"And he shouldn't," Blair insisted. "Sam, you locked in there with that thing, it's certain death."

They had said the same thing about the Cage. And yet, here they were. Sam was back – completely back, and had to live with the knowledge that his body had spent a year and a half doing stuff he would never do in his right mind. Trying to kill the man he thought of as a father. Undermining his brother every step of the way. Hurting Dean, more through his indifference than through any other action he might have taken against him.

"Call it compensation," he muttered.

If anything, Blair looked even less convinced.

"Listen, I don't know what masochistic or martyr-like complex you've got going on here, but keep me out of it, alright?"

Sam huffed.

"Blair…"

"No way, man. You've got a death wish, fine by me. Don't ask me to be an accomplice."

Maybe his soulless self had been right, Sam mused. Maybe having a conscience really was more of a hindrance than a blessing. He quelled the thought as soon as it came to me.

"Listen," he said, trying a different approach. "I'm fairly confident I can lock Cerberus in there and get out in time, before Dean sets fire to the place."

Blair eyed him skeptically.

"So why do you need me outside, then?"

"Extra precaution," Sam insisted. "That's all. If it turns out the only choice is for you to lock that door, lock it. I'm not saying lock it and set fire to the place with me in it. Just trap us both inside until you can come up with a different solution."

"We'll do our best not to trap you inside at all," Blair finally said.

Which was as much as Sam could ask for, he supposed.

xxXXxxx

They got back and Sam got to work preparing the crypt for Cerberus' trap. He wondered briefly who was laid to rest there and hated the fact that whoever they were, the Winchesters had just gotten them involved with supernatural forces. He hoped they did not have family who visited the crypt as a way of dealing with their grief. They did not deserve to have the last reminder of their loved one burned to ash.

Of course, Sam mused, Dean would have said you did not need a fancy grave to mourn your loved ones and them being burned meant they did not come back to cause any problems down the road. Not everyone could think like a hunter, though.

"Hey, Dean," he urged. "Come help me with this sigil, will you?"

Dean gave Sam a puzzled look but he complied.

"Everything OK?" Dean asked pointedly.

Sam nodded curtly.

"Yeah. Just thought it would go quicker with the both of us working."

He did not want to make Dean suspicious, but he definitely did not want Dean and Blair to get a chance to talk. Blair was the type to inform Dean of Sam's plans in a well meaning attempt to keep Sam from even having the opportunity to sacrifice himself – and Sam was not going to get that.

They drew sigils on the windows and door hinges, arranged the objects necessary for the spell, and Sam cut his palm and bled in a bowl, ensuring it was him Cerberus would come to. He then nodded to Blair.

"Amulet," he said.

He saw Blair hesitate, then put his hand in his pocket and hand the amulet to Sam.

"Thanks," Sam said, placing the amulet on the floor. "This should work."

He looked at the other three and tried to appear cheerful.

"Wait outside now," he told them.

Predictably, Dean wavered.

"Sam," he began, but Sam cut him short.

"Outside, Dean. I know what I'm doing. Trust me."

His eyes met Blair's briefly and he hoped Blair was not going to blurt out Sam's last resort plan. Sam was rather surprised when Blair didn't say anything, but followed the others outside.

Sam nodded, satisfied. So far, so good. He was doing this and he had not lost his nerve yet. Briefly, he wished he could have pulled Dean aside and given him a hug. But they never hugged unless it was life or death and any gesture of affection would have made Dean suspicious. No, Sam thought regretfully, he would have to do without.

"Alright," he repeated, more to himself than the others. "It's all in place. I'm ready."

He had a supernatural dog to summon.

xxXXXxxx

Summonings were always tricky and they could always backfire on you. Sam knew that. Even if he set the trap perfectly and did everything right, there was always of chance of something going spectacularly wrong. Sam still remembered the disastrous summoning ritual from when he had been about twelve years old, when the spirit John had been trying to get rid of had eluded the trap and tried to possess Sam. That had started a long line of things trying to get control of him, something that Sam was appreciating less and less as the years passed. At least Cerberus wouldn't be able to possess him – at least, Sam hoped he wouldn't.

He was aware of the other three watching him from outside and of Dean's barely held-back tension. Now was not the time to show nervousness, Sam chided himself. He straightened his shoulders and looked at the piece of paper where he had written one of the simplest summoning spells he could find. John Winchester had always advised them to stick with the basics. The most straightforward spells were usually the strongest.

Sam read the lines of the spell three times, feeling the light of the candles he had lit in the mausoleum flicker. There was no sign of Cerberus, though. Then suddenly, he heard a growl behind him and twisted round. Cerberus was there, alright. But something had gone wrong. He had not arrived in the trap, but next to it. Which meant he could move freely.

"Crap!" Sam muttered.

He raised his shotgun and started backing away towards the door. If he moved slowly, he might make it out before Cerberus was on him. Dogs didn't attack you unless you panicked and made sudden movements, right? But, then again, this was no ordinary dog.

Sam had nearly made it when Cerberus was upon him. He shot at it, but the blast did nothing but deafen Sam. It did not even slow down Cerberus and suddenly Sam felt its great bulk slamming into him so hard, that he was sent to the floor. He dropped the gun and it now lay out of his reach.

Dimly he saw Dean ready to step into the crypt. That would not do. That was not part of the plan.

"Sandburg, shut the door," he shouted. "Shut the door now!"

Briefly, Sam saw Blair wavering. Then, he pushed Dean aside with all his strength, probably taking him by surprise and shut the door. The only problem was, he was on the wrong side. Blair had deliberately locked himself in with Sam and Cerberus.

Really, Sam thought as he tried to fend off the giant hound's snapping teeth, he should have seen this coming.

Sam was not really sure of the next few moments. Cerberus was snarling above him, the door was rattling as Jim and Dean were trying to get in. Blair was somewhere around, but in all the chaos, Sam could not locate him. He was more focused on the giant dog baring its teeth above him.

He tried to push the dog away. He and Cerberus made eye contact then and something happened. It was as if the creature above Sam had somehow gotten inside Sam's mind, past any defenses, and was even scaling the Wall that Death had said would keep the Hell trauma out of Sam's mind. And Cerberus was looking straight at what was there.

Sam saw it in the beast's eyes: hints of flames and ice and him – Lucifer, yet not looking like his vessels, but like himself. Sam had forgotten that, the thing no one alive should ever have to see. The sight paralyzed him.

He was being drawn inside that image, as the awareness that all of that had happened to him, that he had been the leading actor in that drama nearly overwhelmed Sam. His hold on Cerberus went slack, his instincts no longer working as they should have been. All he could do was stare at the things he saw in Cerberus' eyes and wait for the Wall to crack completely. What would he be when that happened – if he would even be alive by then – it was hard to tell. In many ways Sam did not really care, caught in a weird moment of suspense, when he did not know if he wanted to keep the memories buried, or if he did not actually want to remember everything.

There was a clatter and Cerberus drew away from him, snarling furiously as Blair had just flung one of the urns at him. Released from the deadly gaze, Sam had little time to get his bearings back. He used all the willpower he possessed to move his thoughts away from the glimpses he had seen in Cerberus' eyes. Yes, he had experienced all that, Sam told himself, but it was over. He was out. He was back in the real world again, and he did not have to think about all the time his soul had spent stuck in the Cage with the angry Devil.

Sam pushed himself all the way up, trying to figure out what was going on. The bangs against the door were distracting him. He thought he could hear Dean calling his name, but he did not want to think too much about that. He had made his choice. Of course, he had never intended to make it for Blair as well, which meant he had to get Sandburg out. Sam did not think he would have too many chances to get out himself before he carried out his secret plan, but he would deal with that when the time came.

Cerberus had now pushed Blair against the far wall and was circling him, ready to pounce. Blair held his ground, staring the dog in the eye. Sam wondered briefly what he was seeing. He looked terrified, but defiant.

"Stay back," Blair ordered and Sam had no idea if he was talking to Cerberus or to him.

Sam saw Cerberus wavering. Maybe Blair was channeling his inner shaman, maybe Cerberus identified him as Moira's main target and was trying to figure out what to do, it didn't matter, though. Sam was sure the dog would make a move soon, probably at Blair and then at Sam to make sure both threats were eliminated.

The amulet still lay where Blair had placed it before the summoning ritual. Sam grabbed it.

"Hey!" Sam shouted. "Remember this?"

As soon as his hand was on the amulet, Cerberus turned to him. Once more, their eyes met, and once more, there was a connection. Only this time it was different. This time, Cerberus identified Sam as the wielder of the amulet. The one who could give him orders.

Sam nodded, recognizing the change.

"That's right," he said. "I'm just about to make you my bitch."

I've turned into Dean, Sam thought with giddy amusement. And, to be fair, the plan he had made had a very Dean-like quality: the same recklessness and disregard of personal wellbeing that Sam often accused Dean of. But it was different with Sam. For one thing, this was Sam's way of redeeming himself. He needed to do this.

"Sam, what the hell are you doing?" Blair asked.

It was funny he should phrase it that way, Sam thought, because what he was about to do would probably leave him in a kind of hell – different from the one he had just escaped from, but a hell nonetheless.

"A soul for a soul," Sam said, then repeated the phrase in Enochian. "Isn't this how it works? You are given a soul, and you back off, right? You leave everyone else alone? And in the case of my soul, you've got plenty in there to keep you satisfied for a long time. You won't need anyone else. You can leave Cascade alone."

Cerberus was now sitting on its haunches, eyes on the amulet.

"Sam you don't want to do this," Blair told him from where he was trying to move away from the wall and approach the two.

"Stay where you are," Sam said.

With one hand he was holding the amulet. With the other, he was pointing his gun at Blair, who stopped in his tracks.

"Sam," he began cautiously.

"You don't move unless you're moving towards the door and getting the hell out of here. Trust me, Blair, I'm a very good shot. I know how to aim so I don't kill you or do too much damage. It's just gonna hurt like hell and it's gonna be an incentive for you to stay the hell out of my way."

"Sam, I can't let you sacrifice yourself," Blair protested.

Sam turned his attention to Cerberus who was sitting on its haunches, his eyes fixed on Sam's. The sacrifice was actually being accepted.

"You don't get a say in my choices, Sandburg," Sam said. "Just tell Dean…"

He stopped, because there was nothing Blair could tell Dean that would make what Sam was doing remotely better. It was going to hurt like hell – Sam knew that, especially after Dean's confession during their first night in Cascade. Still, Sam was convinced this was for the best. Maybe Dean could go back to Lisa and Ben then. Maybe he could get back the life Soulless Sam had so thoughtlessly interrupted.

"Oh, right," Blair said. "I'm gonna tell Dean that you sacrificed yourself right here in front of me and I let you do it and then walked away."

Sam's hand tightened on the gun.

"I'm not giving you a choice, am I?"

He turned his attention to Cerberus, dangling the amulet in front of him.

"We do this, and you don't bother anyone else, right? Sandburg, Dean, whoever else you might have on your hit list – you leave all of them alone and be content with just me."

Cerberus was moving towards him, and Sam's eyes were now fixed on him. He wondered what would happen. How would it feel when Cerberus took his soul? He did not think his body would live on without it this time, he was actually sure he'd either die or fall into a coma himself, but maybe he should have prepared for all contingencies. Maybe he should have left a note somewhere that, this time, if he started walking around without a soul, he wanted to be put down before he did any more damage.

Something slammed into him. It wasn't enough to bring him down, but it did knock him a few paces and cause him to drop both gun and amulet. The gun discharged and the bullet shattered against the wall, not hitting anyone. The sound was enough to deafen Sam, though, and for a moment he had no idea what had happened. Then he felt hands on him pushing him forward and heard Blair's urgent voice in his ear.

"Come on, we've got to get out before he stops us."

Cerberus was behind them, still stunned by what he had seen in Sam's eyes. It wouldn't take him long to recover, and Sam wasn't sure they'd be able to get out without him being on their tail. And things had been going so well…

Blair stumbled next to Sam, his knee probably giving out after all the stress Blair had put it through since that morning. Sam switched sides to have himself between Sandburg and Cerberus and pushed him towards the door.

"You might still have a chance to get out," he said.

He felt Blair's hand fasten around his arm.

"Oh, no way, man, we're both getting out. I've invested too much into this to let you become dog food."

They were almost at the door when Cerberus pounced on them. Sam managed to shield Blair, but he felt sharp teeth fasten on his left leg. He cried out and staggered, the pain unlike anything he had felt before.

Was this was Dean felt when the hellhounds…?

He did not have time to finish that thought. Hands were suddenly on him, more than Sandburg's, surely, and he was wrenched away from Cerberus. Echoes of several gunshots heightened his confusion.

A match hissed close by and fire burst out in front of him. Cerberus was now between him and the flames, so he was safe. Still, Sam could not help staring at the flames mesmerized. They looked familiar. They looked…

Then Dean was roughly dragging him away, while Ellison was slamming the door, shutting Cerberus in the burning crypt. Blair was already out.

Sam knelt in the grass, panting. His leg was burning so hard, he was sure it had caught fire. When he looked at it he could see nothing. Only blood. But that did not matter. Because they were done. They were out. And Sam had not needed to sacrifice his soul this time after all. The thought made him lightheaded with relief and he nearly laughed.

Dean's face swam before his eyes.

"Sammy?"

Sam's grin widened.

"Glad you could make it," he commented.

Dean's eyes darkened.

"Don't even try to joke with me, Sam, after the stunt you pulled. I'm ready to tear you limb from limb myself."

Still, although his words were harsh, his touch was gentle as he checked the bite. It was not bleeding anymore, but it did not look good.

"Hospital," Dean stated firmly. "And don't you dare argue. After what you did, you deserve all the poking and prodding and rabies shots you're gonna get."

Sam's eyes widened.

"Rabies shots? I don't need rabies shots."

Dean snorted.

"Dog bite, Sam. You so need them."

Sam frowned.

"Dean, Cerberus doesn't have rabies, he's the dog of the underworld."

Dean nodded as if Sam had just proven his point.

"Right. So who knows what he's been chewing on? We'd better make sure your tetanus shots are up to date as well."

Sam shook his head, letting his head fall on the grass. He felt giddy with relief despite the pain. Close by, Ellison was admonishing Sandburg.

"Hey, just so you know," Sam said. "When I told him to shut the door, I intended for him to do it from outside."

"Hey, it worked out well, didn't it?" Blair pointed out.

Sam wondered if he even knew how close it came to not working out. He mentally checked his Wall, but it felt solid. Still there, still pressing in on him, but solid nonetheless. Sam supposed he should be thankful for small blessings.

At least the hunt was over.

He had reckoned without Moira, though.

Well, at least this is the last cliffhanger for this fic. Since, you know, it'll be done next Sunday ;) But, as I said, don't worry, I'll give them all a clear enough resolution. All I can say is, next we'll have way more comfort than we do hurt and angst. So get ready to have your hearts mended (and broken, since this is Supernatural, it's usually both).

Speaking of simultaneously mending and breaking hearts, any Rings of Power followers are welcome to check out my story Return to Life (posted here and at AO3, as most of my fics), where I try to bring the son of a certain ship's captain out from the rubble of a fallen house where the first season left him at and back to his home where he belongs. It's different from my usual stories and more introspective and character driven.

On another note, I couldn't resist dropping a hint that Sam has seen Lucifer's true face and what that means to Sam. Yup, I really like poking around the heads of messed up characters. But, then again, don't we all?