It was Sunday evening, Fatso, Stinky, and Stretch were playing poker like usual. Sometimes Dr Harvey would join them for Sunday poker, but not this weekend. This weekend he was spending time with Kat at a carnival.

"Anyone got any fives?" Stinky asked.

"Anyone got any donuts?" Fatso looked up from his cards.

"No, go get yourself one from the kitchen." Stretch snapped.

"We don't have any though…" Fatso frowned.

"You can get some tomorrow. I raise the bet a dollar." The leader of the trio placed another poker chip on the pile.

The three were interrupted by Casper walking through the doorway, balancing 3 separate covered trays like an expert waitress.

"Get outta here! You know your banned from playing this!" Stretch snapped at him.

"Yeah, we don't feel like losing to you tonight!" Stinky added in a hurt tone, like he had a grudge.

"I know, I know. I'm not here to play." Casper chuckled.

Stretch noticed the trays.

"Huh, what's this, short sheet?"

"I brought you three some dessert to have with your game." The frost ghost chirped happily.

"Oh…why?" the tall one leaned back and squinted suspiciously.

"A peace offering, to leave Thatch alone." Casper smiled kindly.

Stretch looked at the trays, at his nephew, and then at his two brothers, a slight smirk growing.

"Humm…We make no promises, we'll decide after poker." He answered, having no intention of actually letting up on their pranking.

The little ghost placed the trays in front of his uncles, who quickly placed their cards face down on the table.

Fatso quickly lifted up the lid on the tray, his smile fading once he looked at what was on the tray. It was a piece of celery, a glass of water, and a diet book.

The other two ghosts looked just as confused as their brother and quickly opened up their own trays, all the while Casper watched on, an evil smile starting to grow on his face.

On Stinkys tray was a car air freshener, mouthwash, a toothbrush, a tube of toothpaste, and a glass of orange juice. On Stretch's tray was nothing. Not a single thing.

Casper smirked whilst pulling a candy bar out of his pocket. He shifted his weight on one leg as he watched the three with amusement.

"The hell is this about glow worm?" Stretch snapped.

"You deserved some karma for how you've treated Thatch and me! So, A diet book for my gluttonous uncle, Fatso. Some well needed dental care for Stinky, along with toothpastes best friend; orange juice. And of course for you, Stretch, well…you are what you eat…." The young ghost smiled in a way the three were not used to.

"You got some nerve doing that to us! We keep you safe, and this is how you act? Just for that-"

Stretch grabbed the candy bar right out of his nephews hand.

"I'm taking your candy." He snapped before munching on the sweet treat.

He expected his nephew to run off…but he didn't, he raised a brow.

He meant to ask "What the hell are you still doing here." But no sound came out. He tried again, this time with more alarm, but still no sound.

The smirk returned to Casper's face, along with his eyes turning that angry shade of blue.

"Enjoy the candybar? Mute potion tastes lovely, doesn't it?"

The uncle's eyes went wide.

The youngest started walking around the table, spitting out insults at Stretch rapid fire;

"Tell me, do you intentionally try to insult me all the time, or is your personality just so sad that it's your default setting? The only thing taller than you is your hypocrisy. If I jumped from your ego to your sense of morality, It'd be an act of suicide. You never take the bus because you're usually mistaken as a dim lamp post. You are by far the most hypocritical giraffe I've ever seen. Oh, and when you predictably chase me, please don't knock yourself out on the archways." Casper smiled spitefully before vanishing from sight.

There was silence at the table. Stretch was fuming whilst his two brothers sat rock still and wide eyed.

Their nephew just proclaimed war…

"At least I got orange juice, hehe." Stinky awkwardly chuckled before taking a sip.

Then he quickly spit it out whilst coughing in disgust.

"Uggg, he put toothpaste in it!"

Stretch made an angry noise and slammed his fist on the table.

The next few weeks consisted of a prank war between Casper and the ghostly trio…the trio very much losing. Their nephew had suddenly went from pacifist to evil genius in a day. He was annoyingly always one step ahead of them. The young ghost replaced all of Fatso's sugar cereals with plain cornflakes, replaced all of Stinkys stink bombs with non-fowl smells, and dried out every single pen in the entire house to piss off Stretch, full well knowing he had to do taxes.

Stretch would attempt to send him on impossible errands, but Casper would always achieve them. "Find 5th A battery's." Found them from a seller in a sketchy ally. "Find a mint, raspberry, orange, pecan, white chocolate bar." He gets a local chocolate shop to make one. "Find a Nicolas Cage shower curtain." He found it on ebay, and now Stretch doesn't know what the hell to do with it.

Fatso would have pulled food pranks, but the young one just simply didn't eat at home anymore…Smart. So, he attempted to make Casper create ridiculous foods...whom succeeded each time. Fatso now knew what cotton candy grilled lobster tasted like, as well as bubblegum caviar, and ghost pepper chocolate chip cookies…

And Stinky could never pull any pranks because his nephew messed up all his items. Whoopie cushions now sounded like harmonicas, stink bombs smelled like desserts, and he simply didn't have the heart to pour nasty gunk onto Casper.

Casper on the other hand was starting to get frustrated. How long did his uncle intend to do this? Strec-they couldn't possibly keep this up. Casper had replaced all of the alcohol with water, hid Stretch's wallet, and his truck keys, and his little black date book. Stretch can't possibly think annoying Thatch is worth all this trouble.

Back at the school, he ranted to his friends about the situation. Mantha awkwardly fiddling with the straw in her juice box, feeling quite guilty for fueling this issue.

"He's such a hypocrite, he goes on dates all the time and he has the nerve to mess with my love life!" Casper paced back and forth angrily.

"Maybe you could go tattle tale to his mom." Ra chuckled.

"My grandparents on that side have been dead-dead for decades, I never even got to meet them." The ghost frowned.

He face then suddenly lit up as an idea came to his head.

"Buuut, I do have a great aunt who they'll listen to! Come on Thatch, we're going to go have a chat with a relative of mine." Casper grabbed Thatch's hand and pulled him out of the desk chair he had been sitting in.

"Is that a smart idea?" The vampire raised a brow with a chuckle.

"She needs to see you're not completely awful, else she might not help." The ghost explained.

"Not awful? I'm gonna go pray to Osiris, you're gonna need it." Ra deadpanned.

"Why does your aunt live in the valley of the shadows?" Thatch asked as he followed Casper down to the ground.

The both of them had flown to the valley of the shadows. The vampire shifted back into vampire form as he landed.

"Kibosh banished her here for being too nice." The ghost explained, taking the other by the hand and leading him.

"But he's gone, so can't they leave?" Thatch raised a brow.

"They like it here."

"I'm lost."

"It's not that bad, you'll see… Just ignore the shapeshifting, mind reading monster that lives at the gates." Casper explained, staring at the swaying trees.

"Oh, this is gonna be fantastic. I can just feel it." The vampire groaned.

As the two walked down the trail, the ghost kept staring at the trees. The swaying, dead, ink black trees. They looked almost burnt. Casper could never tell if the trees were moving due to the wind, or if they were doing it on their own accord. Perhaps both.

"Are they gonna grab us or something?" Thatch asked, raising a brow.

"Huh? Oh, uh, no. At least, I don't think so, they never have before. I just…they seem…sad." The ghost explained quietly.

Normally Thatch would laugh at such a statement, but…he wasn't wrong. The trees did have this weird sadness to them.

"Maybe it's just the general creep factor of this place. It's cold, grey, gloomy. It's a pretty depressing looking area."

"Maybe…" Casper responded, continuing onward.

The ghost didn't like the part of the valleys. The trees felt like they were in pain, and it always seemed like there was a faint sound of screaming in the wind…

Something was wrong here, but he was too scared to find out what.

The beast at the front of the portal no longer appeared. Perhaps with Kibosh gone, it had left. Regardless, Casper lead Thatch into the other realm. Once they got inside, the vampire looked around, a confused expression on his face.

"Ah, you're right. It's not that bad…it's much worse." He deadpanned.

The ghost chuckled.

"It looks like a palm springs retirement home." Thatch cringed.

They walked through the park and got to what was essentially a village. Casper lead him to a small home with several pink flamingos on the lawn, and a hot pink glittery mailbox

"Yup, a palm springs retirement home." The vampire remarked.

The ghost elbowed him gently.

"Behave." He scolded with a smirk.

Before Casper could knock on the door, it opened up and Aunt Spitzi came walking out with a lemonade in hand. She stopped, startled for a moment as she noticed the two figures standing in front of him.

"Oh, Casper baby, how are you honey? And who's your friend?" She asked with her usual warm tone.

"We'll, I can't say I'm ok, but I'll get to that in a minuet. This is Thatch, I'm dating him." Casper blushed and gestured to the vampire next to him.

"Oh? Well, you got one hell of a taste there kido. I guess you're into the edgy ones, huh?" she chuckled.

The little ghost giggled and blushed shyly.

"You're a vampire huh?" Spitzi raised a brow at Thatch.

"Yeah."

"Well huh, haven't seen one of them in a while, not here anyways. So I'm afraid I don't got any blood to offer you. None in my veins either." She joked. "I got lemonade, water, and some cola, what would ya like?" She smiled warmly.

"Uh, Cola I guess." Thatch replied, still absorbing everything.

"Alright, you two come on inside and sit on the sofa, I'll go get some drinks and you can tell me about your troubles, Casper." She smiled and turned to go back in the house, the two following her.

Her house was very much like a cabana, with antique looking pink furniture. She had a lot of flamingo and peacock related décor, along with more late 1800s styled furniture. Casper and Thatch sat down on the sofa in the living room, which was the opening room of the small house.

Aunt Spizi came back from the kitchen and placed a cola and a lemonade on the coffee table in front of them, then she sat in the bamboo recliner across from them.

"So honey, what's going on with your life?" She asked.

"Stretch, Fatso, and Stinky are driving me nuts!" Casper exclaimed.

"Oh?"

"They keep pranking Thatch!" he continued.

She just burst out laughing. "Yup, sounds like them. I taught them well."

"But they're going too far! Every time we go on a date, they try to sabotage it. They've tried to dumb eggs on him, they've dumped water on us, they've tried to plant garlic to keep him away, they've put up crosses, threatened him with holy water. They once took all my pants to try and keep me from going on a date, they've followed us on dates, they've even hurt Thatch by throwing him across an ice rink!" he exclaimed before huffing and taking a sip of lemonade.

"Really? They've done all that?" She raised a brow.

"And worst of all, the other day they tried to slip a laxative into his drink!" he snapped.

There was an awkward pause.

The vampire cleared his throat.

"To clarify, we found the pill before I had actually consumed any of it…" he explained quietly.

Aunt Spitzi stood up.

"Well now that just pisses me off. I taught them better than that, a laxative is such a stupid prank. No class, and very abusive. And following you on dates? Now for that I simply will not stand! They got no right to do that, I spent too many years hearing about they're various girlfriends and bozos from my sister! I take it you came here because you want me to give them a chewing out?"

"Yes, please, they'll listen to you." Casper nodded.

"Alright, I can do that. They home right now?"

"Yes."

"Alright, let's go give them a piece of our minds." She huffed.

The front door of - manor opened, a bucket was dropped from an elaborate trap above the door. The three knew from the sound, that it had to've hit someone. They came flying into the hallway, only to come to a screeching stop. In the doorway wasn't Casper or his twilight wannabe…

It was Aunt Spitzi. Hands on her hips, bucket on her head, and a very pissed look on her face.

"S-Spitzi! That wasn't meant for you!" Stinky sputtered.

She flew into the hallway and grabbed both Stretch and Fatso by the ear.

"Federico, grab Vinny!" She snapped at Fatso.

Fatso did as he was told, and grabbed Stinky by the ear.

Casper walked into the doorway, a bat hanging on the back of his sweater, it's face peering over his shoulder. Thatch wanted to watch what was about to go on, and Casper agreed. with all he's had to put up with, he deserved to watch. But he'd also be a target for any of the trio's anger, so the bat form was a bit safer…

Aunt Spitzi pulled the uncles with her towards and into the kitchen, Casper following, but only up to the doorway. He partially hid behind the doorway and peered into the room.

The pink ghost practically threw her nephews towards the table.

"Sit." She snapped sternly.

They instantly did so, watching her fearfully.

"Now I've heard how you've three have been actin! Sticking a laxative into that poor vampire's soda! Thank goodness he hadn't actually managed to eat it!" she exclaimed, putting her hands on her hips.

"It wasn't a laxative…it was Ipecac." Stinky clarified indigently.

"Ah, so throwing up his guts for hours is better, is it?" she glared.

"Yeah it is! Besides, a laxative was the next plan if he still didn't leave." The largest brother chirped up.

Stretch smacked Fatso on the back of the head and glared at him.

Spitzi stared at them, fuming.

"You could have serious harmed him! What if it had fully dissolved before he could drink it whole! He could have gotten internal bleeding, or worse!?" she snapped.

The three uncles practically shrank, Stretch literally.

"Well…he didn't drink it. He's fine…" Stinky muttered.

"It's the thought that counts! And you've thrown water at him, garlic, crosses! Nearly gave him a concussion on an ice rink!"

"Oh, come on Fatso didn't hit him that hard!" Stretch argued, crossing his arms.

"And where do you three get off trying to ruin Casper's relationship!?" She glared, snapping at them again.

"We're his uncles, we're supposed to watch out for him." Fatso huffed.

"Yeeah! That there vampire is a delinquent! A trouble maker with one thing on his mind!" Stretch snapped, extending his arm across the room to point at the bat on his nephew's shoulder.

Spitzi smacked his hand, and he yelped and snapped it back to its proper length, holding it with his other hand, staring at her with alarm.

"Oh, like you three are to talk! You're the biggest delinquents I've ever known! And one thing on his mind?! That's rich coming from you three homewreckers!" She snapped, almost laughing at the irony of it.

The three looked stunned.

"I wasn't around 24/7, but my sister told me ALL about your antics! Stinky once dated two girls at once! Fatso, you've dated girls just to steal they're cookbooks!

"Fatso! That's cruel!" Casper suddenly shouted from the doorway, looking shocked and hurt.

"It's not something I'm proud of." the large ghost frowned, ashamed.

"And Stretch! Oh ho ho, you're the worst of them all! You've dated more people, and have had more one night stands in your 20s, than I have in my entire life and unlife combined! You've dated multiple women at once, you were out at night more often then you were home, you've dated married women, and I don't even wanna know how many pregnancy scares you've had! I think I'd be more surprised if you didn't have a human grandchild walking around that you don't know about!" She practically yelled at the eldest brother.

Stretch had gradually shrunken with each remark until he became a little snake, curled up on the chair, peering through his coils, shamed.

"Those two have been together for over a month now, you've never managed to date a girl for more than two weeks! You can't call that vampire a lust crazed delinquent when you exist! Not when you're the king of delinquency and boot knocking!" She snapped, practically steaming with anger. "So you three better leave Casper and his boyfriend alone, got it!? Else I'll come over and give you three a new piece of my mind again!" and with that, she turned and left in a huff, leaving the three ghosts clinging to their chairs in fear and shame.

Casper quickly followed her outside.

"Wow…you can really talk down to someone." He chuckled awkwardly.

"Thanks sweetheart, sometimes you just got it!" she smiled.

"Do you want me to help you home?" the young ghost asked warmly.

She laughed.

"I aint that old yet, and you probably should get back to your school. Keep being good." She hugged him and gave his cheek a slight pinch, which made him laugh.

"and you be good to my great nephew, alright?" She smiled and patted bat-Thatch on the head, who simply nodded respectfully.

"You and your new boy toy be careful, alright? No fallin in evil swirling pits, or getting eaten by spiders. Or diseases for that matter." She winked at Casper, whom froze and blushed at the term "boy toy."

Thatch just cackled

"I like her!" He stated to Casper, pointing a wing at her whilst grinning.

Spitzi smirked at him and chuckled. She gave them a half salute and flew off.

Casper and Thatch sat outside on the front stairs of the school, relaxing. The ghost leaning on the vampires shoulder, and the vampire leaning on the stone wall of the staircase. Ra and Mantha had went into town to get some stuff, the ghost was going to tell them all about Aunt Spitzi's visit once they got back.

There was something Casper was itching to ask the vampire next to him, who was looking at his phone.

"So…can I call you that now…?" the ghost asked, playing with his sleeves awkwardly, a blush on his face.

"Call me what?" The vampire raised a brow before rearing up with an amused look on his face.

"You want to call me a boytoy?" he asked with amused surprise.

"NO- No, no, no- I meant…can I…are we…boyfriends now?" Casper fiddled with his hands.

Thatch just looked at him confusedly for a moment before snorting.

"Yeah, as that is generally what you call someone you've been dating for over a month." He rolled his eyes with an affectionate smile.

"Well I didn't want to assume." The ghost explained sheepishly.

"And, you know, if you want to call me your boytoy, you can do that too." The vampire smirked flirtily.

"NO!" the ghost snapped with an embarrassed flush.

Thatch snickered.

Casper has gotten very good at waiting for Spitzi to swallow her drinks before telling her things XD