Author's Note: I think it's time for another journey with our two favorite sabers once again. I wanted to make sure I had this one planned out before starting the first chapter. Something I've never done prior to this.

Chapter 1

Not a drop of blood is drawn but you know how it bleeds.

She never thought she'd end up this way. She never thought she could be so depressed. So low. Her eyes barely had the energy to stay open as she stared out across the valley from above the falls. A black bird caught her attention as it flew above her and down the valley until it disappeared, leaving only a feather behind that landed atop her paw.

She gently touched it, feeling its smooth texture as she focused her sight back to the falls. She loved the sound of the rushing water misting over the edge. It allowed her a sanctuary to talk to herself. Because it was all she had. The noise easily went over her voice. Just so nobody could overhear her. Nobody would know how damaged she was. She had to constantly let words and emotion spill from her mouth just to cope with her trauma and lack of comprehension.

No one would care. No one would want me. Everyone wants things that can be fixed… and I'm permanently broken.

She found herself up there everyday since it happened, the thought of leaning off the edge forged into her mind on multiple occasions just to release herself of everything. So that she may find her way beyond the suffering she knew.

She sighed and grit her teeth. Her eyes scanned around herself, seeing the silvered pelt dim in contrast due to how little she had been taking care of it as of late. Her pelt was tangled and knotted. She hardly ate. Her stomach constantly growled and begged for some source of nutrients. Her lips lapped of dehydration. But there was a reason behind it all. There was a reason she felt so cold. So dead inside.

She recalled the stormy night, roaring snarls and tearing of skin as each strike of thunder lit up the drenched surroundings. All the while she could do nothing but hide and tremble as she watched the group of humans embed their weapons into one of her two brothers. Her only family.

"Shira… please. Just… stay here." The younger of the two struggled to say, giving her a quick hug before turning to leave.

She was told to stay hidden. To stay safe underneath the hollowed log. She knew the humans hadn't seen her yet, recalling her brothers rushing to their den to warn her before hand. The next she knew, the three of them were darting through the pouring rain.

"Why are they doing this?" She whimpered, knowing that humans only attacked if provoked.

As the two crouched under the lumber, her brother seemed more focused on something behind him, out of view from where she was.

"We found something…"

"What?"

His breathing struggled to keep steady as he swallowed and shook his head.

"Our species… it's in terrible, terrible danger."

She wanted him to elaborate, but little did she know that was the last time she'd ever talk to him. Just then, her life would be changed forever.

His screaming startled her. She didn't know what was wrong until the sharp edged weapon came out of his chest. Her jaw dropped as she covered her mouth with her paw, refraining from making noise in fear the humans would hear her. She had no choice, she had to leave him as he was pulled out from underneath the log. She wanted to keep her promise. To stay hidden.

In between the crackling skies and the drenching weather, she couldn't bring herself to look at it any longer. She was just a scared little kitten as she whimpered with her paw to her temple, gritting her teeth as every scream erupted.

No thoughts could contemplate together. Somehow, through all the suffering she had to endure, her mind became numb. It didn't want to think anymore.

So she just waited. Her thoughts emptied and her emotions dried as she regretfully cast one final glance out the crack in the tree as her remaining brother pleaded and whimpered, holding the other now lifeless sibling before the final yelp came with the piercing blow.

As the sounds lowered, as the night silently drifted, she remained there in shock. All she could feel was the pouring rain that splashed onto her face as she quietly cried, not minding if the stinging pain in her eyes lasted forever. She wished some of the hurt her brothers suffered would go to her. She knew they were gone. They were taken and used for whatever the humans hunted them for.

She wanted to go after the humans. She wanted to kill and make them regret everything they did. Right then, it seemed so easy to justify the ending of a life. Yet, she also figured she'd just get killed trying.

Maybe that would be a good thing.

A week had passed since then. It left her lost, scared and confused. The guilt of what happened that night never left her. She knew it never would to the point where she became vulnerable to anything and everything. She became desperate. She just wanted to feel something again.

She had watched the sun traverse across that day, only now just emitting a peach colored sky as it set. It didn't hide the fact that she had been there all day, wasting it like so many others.

What else am I suppose to do, anyway?

Her lustful instincts had fantasized for so long. She always had this vision of being with a loving and caring saber for the rest of her life. Someone she could cuddle into every night as she fell asleep. Someone she could feel comfortable sharing her emotions with. Someone to keep her warm through the freezing world.

Someone who cared.

It never became any less painful when ever she thought up an ideal life. A life she wanted to believe she deserved. One she had waited so long for. But it wasn't like she actively attempted to better herself. It wasn't like she had an obligation to make friends and relationships on a daily basis.

As if there were any sabers around nowadays.

It wasn't something she thought about often, but it was a bit strange not seeing much of her pack out and about as of late. She figured it was just the coming of age. Everyone was growing up. Everyone had responsibilities. That was how packs evolved as far as she knew. And it only reminded her of how far behind she was and how bad at life she felt.

The tigress brushed the black feather off the falls as the last of the sun's light vanished behind the mountains. She lifted herself up, stretching and letting out a lengthy yawn before turning and heading for home.

Wherever that is…

The more she thought about it, the more she remembered her brothers. How much they got her through. As a cub, she couldn't fit in with the other sabers. She was always left out. But her brothers were always there for her. They made her feel whole. They taught her how to hunt. How to swim. How to watch out for one another.

Tears couldn't be held back from her silvered face. She didn't really know what it was she had until it was gone.

I miss them so much…

It was a constant struggle to compose her dark thoughts each and every day. It felt like her mind was a random number generator. It wasn't in her control how she felt. Regardless, she was impressed at her ability to repress her emotions for so long. She always kept to herself, never willing to talk about her problems in front of others.

And certainly not with Isaac…

She knew her mate wouldn't mind talking to her about these subjects, but he also wasn't one to openly show his feelings for her. It hurt her that sabers, instinctively, were like that.

Find a mate, have cubs and move on.

Moving on was something she never understood. It only seemed to be a phrase for the sake of being a phrase. Nothing deeper than that.

Yet it was all the world wanted her to do. After her brothers were killed, she was told to move on. After mating season, she would move on. Once the cubs got old enough, they'd move on.

With each step, she crunched into the ice, wishing she could be someplace warm. Wishing someone could be there for her. She yearned for it more as the wind began to pick up, her whole body shivering as she whimpered to herself and silently cried of frozen tears.

The tigress made her way around the cliff side from the falls and down the frozen stream, dragging herself along beside it.

The first of the dens passed on her right. Most were usually empty at this time of day since hunting usually went on before sunset.

Some dens were occupied with families. There was one she'd go by every day, always seeing the food they brought back. Seeing the happy cubs privileged to eat everyday. So badly she wanted the strength to ask if she could have a small share, but that feeling of undeserving kept crawling to her head. As a result, she never bothered. She'd always turn away with her growling stomach.

She came to a halt as she approached her den that rested above all the others. hesitant to step around the corner to the entrance. The truth was, she didn't want to see her mate. She didn't want to see anyone. She had become so used to being alone, she found herself preferring it. She truly believed the single life was for her. She was happier that way.

At the last second, she decided to bale and slowly pad away. But she only took a few steps before her stomach growled loudly enough for her mate to hear as he peered around the corner.

"Shira?"

She bit her lips and forced a slight smile as she turned around to see the coal black saber standing before her. He was much bigger than most sabers. His eyes had a crimson red tint to them and his muscled physique showed that he was extremely active especially when it came to hunting.

"Where've you been all day?" His deep and intimidating voice bellowed out. She just shrugged in response, out of energy to say or do anything.

God I'm so tired. So hungry…

Her mate cursed of frustration as she reluctantly followed him inside, a tint of anger striking as her mate piled out the bones and remains from his hunt that day. She just wished he had saved some for her. She wished she could've been considered for once.

The truth was that it just reminded her how little the two of them spent time together. They never hunted together. They never slept together. Most nights involved her sneaking out and falling asleep under the stars if the weather was tame.

"You know…"

Her regretful thoughts were killed as her mate cleared his throat.

"I'd like to know where you're always going."

She choked on her trembling sadness that was an emotion away from bursting out into tears. The day had already been rough on her mentality and she imagined there wasn't much more she could take at the moment.

"I was hunting all day." She lied as her limbs stiffened in anger. She didn't want him knowing how down she felt. How she spent her time doing practically nothing. And she knew how inexperienced she was at hunting, so it wouldn't have been a huge surprise to him that she came back with nothing.

"I find that hard to believe." He scoffed,

"Why's that?" She asked with her brow risen and her head tilted slightly, annoyed with his consistency of having a problem with almost anything.

"Because it's been like this for a week."

Her eyes left his yet she still felt his gleaming stare.

"What's been goin' on?"

"I don't know." She trembled at the floor.

"Well, I hope you know soon. Before the season's over, that is."

At this comment, she raised her head, knowing all too well what he meant. She was expected to mate with him. To have cubs and move on.

"Isaac…" she sighed, looking up to the ceiling.

"I'm sorry I have to keep bugging you about it. It's just-"

"No. I'm sorry. It's my problem… I just haven't been feeling too well."

She only hoped he took it that she was sick. Nothing more.

"Christ, Shira… who else would put up with you? You really think that excuse is gonna work?"

Silence bled into the den. Her heart ached. Her throat choked on sadness. It just went to show that even if she gave the slightest indication that she wanted to talk about her feelings, no one would want to hear them.

"Anyways, I'm gonna go for a run tonight." He began as he stretched his limbs in preparation.

Yeah. Just keep going out and doing stuff. Keep being happy.

"You wanna come?"

"I'm good." She bit her pain to say.

"Your call." He ended as he turned towards the exit.

She grit her paws and clenched her teeth, wanting so badly to just yank him back and give him the biggest slap to the face. But truthfully, she was afraid of what he'd do in response. She knew he had a temper. He often showed that through his overprotective nature when other sabers eyed her.

As she was left there in silence, her mind traced back to sex. It was customary for the male to leave once the cubs were born. But she didn't want that.

With Isaac, yes… but with someone else…

She often fought to believe he was her mate in the first place. But looking back, it made sense. She was alone. Helpless. Desperate. He was the first to show up. He was well toned with looks and a deep, powerful voice. He had everything any female saber could ask for.

On the outside.

She felt so shallow for allowing herself to fall victim to it. The fact that he was attracted to her at all only made her question the way she saw herself. A total wreck. An unattractive mess.

He probably just felt sorry for me.

She wasn't sure what needed to change or what she had to do to better herself. She tried piecing it together as she twiddled with a remaining carcass bone with her head to the ground, staring out into nothing.

Leaving here forever… that would never work. Isaac would just track me down. I don't know, I'm… stuck. I've been stuck for so long while everyone else is moving on.

The more she thought, the more tired she felt as she yawned and shut her eyes, only thinking of one thing as she drifted to sleep.

I just want someone to talk to. That's all.

She stood atop the peak of the mountain, overlooking the entire world around her. For a brief moment in time, she knew how it felt to be alive. She felt so safe with the light that followed her everywhere.

"I don't want you to leave."

The light shined brighter. It's black wings extended every feather.

"I have to. They'll start wondering where you are."

She felt hurt as it spoke. As if memories were suddenly flooding back from brighter days. The voice seemed so familiar to her.

She watched the stars light up the fires down below like they did every night. There was always thought about the stars. About the fires. Somehow, the connection made sense to her.

"I don't care what they wonder." She coldly replied as she shivered from the cold burst of wind, noticing how clean and beautiful her pelt looked as the breeze stroked through. It was in her deepest desire to let the wind carry her somewhere she could call home.

"Who are you?" She trembled, her eyes glowing of the fires below.

There was no response as she turned back to the glowing aura. Only it wasn't a blinding light anymore. She saw herself. Sitting. Watching.

"I am your reflection." Her voice spoke.

"I don't understand."

The tigress sat down in front of her, tilting her head as her copy reached a paw out.

"You've been asleep for a very long time."

To this, she could say nothing back. All she did was reach for her paw with her own.

They touched.

She woke with a gasping breath as she lifted herself up, paws gripping the floor and her head lowered. She swallowed and panted of her startled wake.

What the hell was that?!

Her eyes focused to the ground as she took it all in, noticing the beads of sweat that dripped from her forehead. Only then did she realize her entire body was drenched the same.

Great. As if I wasn't enough of a mess already.

It just further convinced her that she wasn't meant to be in a relationship of any sort. Truth be told, what she and Isaac shared didn't necessarily feel like one.

But I still love him… right?

That seemed constantly up for debate, considering she constantly viewed everyone around her as perfect, for lack of a better term. Something she had tried time and time again to become. But her mistakes, her depression wouldn't let her.

She could only contemplate that one of many problems before her mind inevitably shifted back to that dream.

I've never woken up like that. It was almost like… I felt it.

Her heart and veins had only then finalized their rapid responses until she closed her eyes and took one last deep breath before stepping outside during the late hours, thankful for the cool temperature to balance out her heated state.

It wasn't surprising in the least that her mate had yet returned, but she shook her head of that frustration and instead focused her way down to the river for a drink.

I really want things to work. Between us. I've tried talking to him. Reasoning. I just…

She finished lapping up the water and gulped the rest of it down, just then realizing how thirsty she was as it still dribbled down her chin.

I just don't know.