So, these are just three short, silly drabbles that I couldn't justify as whole chapters XD but maybe you'll find them funny X3 ALSO, that little fact about mistletoe, if you can guess the rest of it, is absolutely true. People were VERY dirty about plant symbolism back in the day XD

In batform, Thatch flew down towards Casper, who sat on the bleachers outside the school. The ghost was reading a lime green book. The vampire landed on the bleacher behind Casper, whom was still unaware of the others presence. Thatch leaned forward and scanned the book, raising a brow at one particular passage.

"Mistletoe is considered a romantic flower due to its white berries resembling drops of-"

"What the hell are you reading?" the vampire mumbled in confusion.

Casper slammed the book shut and nearly fell off the bench.

"You scared the crap outta me!" he exclaimed, looking up at Thatch,

"Spookology taught me well." The vampire chuckled.

The ghost rolled his eyes as he settled back on the bench, his boyfriend sitting next to him.

"So, again, what on earth are you reading? Dirty plant facts?" Thatch elbowed Casper with a cheeky smirk.

"Huh?"

"I saw the bit about mistletoe."

"Oh…" the ghost's face turned blue. "It's a book about plant symbolism, though, err, I am slowly figuring out that most plants symbolize something pervy…" He chuckled sheepishly, awkwardly tapping the book as he held it.

"Oh, why don't you read me some then~?" the vampire purred, leaning down close to the other.

"Ha! no! But you can certainly read it if you want. Just, uh, don't judge me, I didn't know it was like this until after I bought it." Casper chuckled.

"Sure you didn't…" Thatch smirked.

The ghost's face turned blue again.

"I didn't, shut up!" He snapped, perhaps a bit too defensively.

The vampire started skimming some pages.

"Wow, this is basically a flower themed smut book. If you've got a plant kink, you're covered." He joked.

The ghost covered his face as he snickered.

"What the hell is a plant kink?" he laughed, his voice muffled through his hands.

"I don't know, but I assume this would satisfy someone with it. Man, people really just saw flowers and decided to give them the dirtiest meanings. I'll never see Orchids the same way." Thatch snickered.

"Oh no, did the book ruin a flower for you?" Casper chuckled sarcastically.

"Nope, before I didn't give a crap. Now I can just look at certain plants and laugh."

"Great, when I'm gardening you're just gonna make pervy jokes about every plant." The ghost sighed with a bemused smile.

"Yes."

"I shouldn't have let you read the book. It was a mistake." Casper chuckled and shook his head.

The vampire just smirked.

The ghost covered his mouth again, starting to snicker.

"Plant kink…" he wheezed, the sound muffled from his hands.

"I guess that's what Flyboy's into." Thatch stated casually.

Casper made a sound like a dying wheeze and fell off the bleacher again, doubling over in laughter.

I thought it would be interesting to make a chapter like it's text messages on a phone XD So, enjoy.

Dummy; "So, what you and your bf watching today?"

Thatch; "It was his turn to pick this week, he wanted to watch some Youtube show."

Dummy; "What show?"

Thatch; "Ok, he insists it's for adults, I want you to keep that in mind."

Dummy; "My god, what did he pick?"

Thatch; "I question if I should tell you."

Dummy; "Mua can be trusted."

Thatch; "..It's called puppet history…"

Dummy; "…."

Dummy; "You need a juice box with that too?"

Thatch; "Look, he says that they curse and make innuendo's, ight!"

Dummy; "It sounds like a human kids cartoon. I can just picture you with a lil juice box and a lunchable."

Thatch; "Stfu."

Dummy; "Are you cranky? Does Thatchy need a nap?"

After a few minutes, the vampire didn't respond, and she was starting to wonder if she legit offended him. When a response came though, it was a picture of a blue furry puppet in adventurer gear, the caption below it read; "Man, you were an ugly baby."

Dummy; "You're such a dick. So, what is the show anyways?"

Thatch; "It's like a game show kind of thing. The puppet teaches you about a weird event in history, and then quizzes the contestants, and they can win jellybeans. Ok, I can confirm, the puppet does curse."

Dummy; "Did Casper provide jellybeans?"

Thatch; "He did."

The vampire sent a photo of a bag of jellybeans with the caption "why are there 50 fucking flavors?"

They took a break from chatting for a while, Dummy was doing her nails when she got another message.

Thatch; "Australia had a fucking war with emus."

Dummy; "Excuse me."

Thatch; "You heard me. Australian soldiers were sent to fight off emu's to defend some crops, and there were so many emu's, and they are bizarrely bullet resistant, that the soldiers lost. The Australian army lost a war to a bunch of fucking 5 foot flightless birds. XD"

Dummy; "Australia isn't a place, it's an experience."

Thatch; "And the experience is various ways to die."

Some more time passed, she got another message

Thatch; "Ok, so some people in France once danced till they died."

Dummy; "Why?"

Thatch; "Mass hysteria and/or witchcraft. Nobody knows, people just started dancing day and night until their feet bled and they collapsed of exhaustion."

Dummy; "See kids, don't dance and drop."

Thatch; "Was that a fucking 'don't drink and drive' joke?"

Dummy; "What the hell else would it be?"

More time passed, Dummy was reading a magazine, relaxing as the evening rolled in. Another message.

Thatch; "BITCH, PEOPLE DROWNED IN MOLASUS!"

Dummy; "Fucking what?"

Thatch; "YEAH, BOSTON HAD A VAT OF MOLASUSU BURST AND FLOOD THE TOWN! 21 PEOPLE DIED!"

Dummy; "How big was the vat?!"

Thatch; "I think it was like 5 storeys tall."

Dummy; "Why the hell did they need so much?"

Thatch; "The war."

Dummy; "Yeah, that clears that right up,"

Thatch; "Apparently molasses can be distilled into alcohol, and I guess there was a shortage in the war. But the builders didn't use the correct rivets or whatever, and the vat just kind of split open and spilled into the city."

Dummy; "Man, you know their corpses still had molasses on them."

Thatch; "Yeah, I bet the rats ate great for months. Sugared meat just straight up prepared for them."

Dummy; "Eww."

It was Saturday movie date night. Over the past few months of dating, Thatch and Casper had found that movie nights were they're favorite kind of date. It was casual and relaxed. They could cuddle, eat snacks, and make jokes about the movies; it was the best. They took turns choosing the movie, and it was fun watching the others reaction to a film.

The movie this time was Alligator from 1980. Casper had chosen it. It was a good thing he had seen it before, because right now he couldn't quite get himself to pay attention…

As Thatch was wearing his glasses.

Thatch usually wore contacts, mostly for movies and reading. But they were the disposable kind, and he was running low, so right now he was wearing his glasses.

The vampire just had to be attractive, didn't he?

"Man, the glasses must really look dumb if they make you stare this much."

The ghost was knocked from his stupor.

"I'm not staring." He replied quickly

"Yeah you are." Thatch turned to look at him more fully, chuckling.

"Well, uh-" Casper trailed off, his face quickly turning blue. He wanted a hole to swallow him up and prevent this embarrassment.

"It's ok, I know they look dumb. You don't gotta pretend that they don't" the vampire smiled, tilting his head.

"No no, they don't look dumb." The ghost stammered with a smile, refusing to make eye contact.

"Really, why do you keep staring then, hum?" Thatch raised a bro, giving a chuckle.

"Well, um," Casper stammered with an ashamed smile, his face sky blue. "Because, they look quite attractive…" each word he uttered got quieter, and higher in pitch.

There was a moment of silence as the vampire stared at him blankly, as if absorbing weird info. When he did process it, a very evil smirk formed on his face.

"Oh~ I see how it is, you were ogling me huh?" he grinned, leaning in closer to the ghost.

"I wasn't ogling! I was…" Casper attempted to defend himself, but trailed off when he realized he couldn't think up an excuse.

"Ogling?" the vampire finished the sentence for him.

The ghost just made a weak noise of protest and his face in his hands.

"So, the glasses do something for you, huh? Alrighty then." He practically purred before rearing back up.

The vampire smirked and undid the first two buttons on his shirt. Then he half leaned against the wall, resting his elbow on a pillow, and resting his head on his hand. He basically tried to make the most attractive pose he could. And it worked, the ghost's hair stood on end.

Casper blushed and buried his face in his hands. Again.

"You're an absolute bastard." He muttered from behind his hands.

"I know. But I'm you're bastard. I've discovered these things give me a whole new power over you, and I intend to use it." Thatch grinned, pointing at his glasses.

"If you didn't need those things for eyepain, I'd hide them." The ghost groaned, face still in hands.

"Aww, but then you wouldn't get to see me in them and drool about it." The vampire mocked.

"Shut up!" Casper snapped defensively.

"Would it add to the appeal if I started talking like it's-?" Thatch continued with the most charming, suave, flirty tone of voice he could muster. "What's a pretty little thing like you doing in a place like this? Tell me angel, did is hurt when heaven kicked you out for being too good? With eyes like that, stars are gonna get jealous. So, darling, how about we ditch-Hmf!" he was cut off as the other pounced on him.

"You absolute annoyance!" Casper snapped frustrated, trying to fight a bemused smile.

Thatch just laughed.