"As Dudley was hilariously struggling to get up, the boa constructor escaped and on his way out said, 'Thanks[,] amigos.'" –Vampirediaries30, "The Potter Twins: Harry and Rose Potter, Year 1"*

"Don't mention it, Mr Valdez," said Harry. "Uncle Vernon had no right to lock you in the cellar for 'making fancy scarves while foreign' – and, anyway, we'd have helped our worst enemy escape if it meant getting to see Dudley bound hand and foot with a feather boa. Wouldn't we, Rose?"

"Oh, naturally," said his sister.

Valdez shrugged grandiloquently. "Be that as it may, I remain eternally in your debt," he said. "If the señorita ever finds herself inadequately accessorised for a school fiesta, only call upon me, and her neck shall be draped with the finest construction in my power. Till when, adiós, my noble saviours."

And, with a final bow, he darted out into Privet Drive, leaving the trussed-up Dudley scowling beside the cellar door. "See if I ever guard a prisoner for Dad again," he muttered. "Dunno why I didn't learn my lesson after that Czechoslovakian stole fabricator…"

"They both looked a little surprised, neither of them clearly having been paying any attention, but it was Daphne who was on the spotlight and had to respond with a quick 'pardon-me'." –D'rascal101, "Throne: Book 1"

"Yes, you certainly ought to be begging my pardon," said Mr Greengrass sternly. "What on Earth are you doing up there, young lady?"

Daphne shrugged helplessly. "Just wasn't thinking, I guess," she said. "Astoria and I were practising our big scene together in the show, and I guess it kind of… well, swept us off our feet."

Astoria giggled, and Mr Greengrass rolled his eyes. "If I'd known, sixteen years ago," he said, "that your mother was going to saddle me with daughters who mindlessly levitated when they got excited, I'd have thought twice before proposing to her." He sighed. "Oh, well. Astoria, that box isn't locked, is it?"

Astoria tried the door of the box where the interruption of the sisters' frolic had landed her. "Not from the inside, no," she said.

"Fine," said Mr Greengrass. "Come on down, and let's see if we can't find a ladder or a broom somewhere in this theatre before Mr Willis comes in and sees your sister sitting on his main spotlight. You know how touchy these lighting fellows can be about their equipment…"

"Harry startled and nearly toppled off the swing set with how fast he twisted his body to face the street and the source of the unexpected voice." –AnarchicMuse, "The Triumph of These Tired Eyes"†

"Oh, Harry, please don't do that!" the swing set said, its voice faint and fluttery in Harry's head. "You'll put me in the junkyard before my time if you keep startling me that way – to say nothing of the risks to your own poor skull."

"Sorry," said Harry abstractedly. "But, seriously, what was that? I could have sworn I just heard some hollow, cavernous voice intone, 'What little thing is this that I see wagging its tail, and snapping eagerly?'"

"Oh, that." The swing set laughed. "That's just the new hydrant they installed last week. He loves to pull out that quote every time someone walks a dog past; I suppose I should have warned you."

Harry took a deep breath, and shook his head. Decidedly, his ability to communicate with civic structures could be a mixed blessing at times.

"He sucked in air desperately between his lips, sounding like a fish out of water, like he had just run a marathon. How indigenous." –TheCrazyFanGirl23, "The Boy Who Couldn't Be Saved"

"What's wrong, Draco?" said Pansy. "Polyjuice Potion disagreeing with you?"

"No, it's this stupid bone in my nose," said Draco. "I don't know how this fellow breathed with it; it's taking about half my strength just to get an adequate air supply."

Pansy laughed disdainfully. "Oh, that's going to help you blend into a traditional Asmat village."

"Look, I know, all right?" Draco snapped. "I'm not cut out to be an indigenous New Guinean tribesman. I never said I was."

"Then why did you volunteer for this mission with me?"

Draco paused, and cast a wordless glance over the shapely figure who stood before him in traditional Asmat déshabillé. "Oh… I don't know," he muttered. "Just stupid, I guess."

*Sorting-Head tip to thrawnca for locating the nucleus of this Minuet. (Not this specific quote, though, which is why it's appearing in this chapter instead of the next all-thrawnca chapter - 65, I'm thinking, though, if anyone wants it earlier, feel free to say so.)

†Crossover with Avengers.