The following week was a nightmare to John. Right from the following day in court, Jo struck the note with him that he had most dreaded. She had performed correctly enough in court, and had gone through the appropriate motions but that vital spark in her had gone. Her submissions were well drafted without that normal burning sense of passion that she felt for the cause. He had even tried his favourite ploy of butting in and taking over the questioning from her. Ordinarily, it had always made her fume and she had always radiated waves of irritation and exasperation but not this time. She merely carried on standing like a statue, and let him get on with it for a few minutes. It was as if she couldn't be bothered to fight with him anymore. At each break in the court session, she promptly turned on her heel and beat a retreat.
In the lunchtime break, he bumped into Brian Cantwell, the opposing counsel. Ordinarily, the man was not his most congenial company but he drew John aside.
"I was looking forward to the usual fireworks that I normally get from Jo or George not to mention your inevitable intervention on both sides of the case, John"
"You don't get the same sense of excitement and danger from the other judges and barristers, Brian? You make it sound as if you're missing us." John retorted dryly.
"You don't ever change but Jo has. She's letting me get away with far too much and that's new for her"
That confirmed John's worst fears. Utter reactionary though Cantwell was, he wasn't stupid. If he didn't know him any better, he might have thought that there was an element of disinterested concern for her underneath his professed unscrupulous dedication as a hired gun for the fattest fees.
"I'd noticed," Came John's short reply.
"I'm not especially close to Jo as you know so I'm not likely to know what's going on in her life. Still, she's one of the club and I suppose that this still counts for something these days"
"Thanks, Brian." John murmured with feeling, touching his sleeve as he passed on to head back to his chambers. He was not deceived by the man's lightness of tone.
The week crawled by as the trial progressed to its conclusion. Brian Cantwell was defending counsel and, when it came for the jury to pronounce the verdict, they acquitted the man in the dock. Ordinarily, Cantwell would have visibly gloated at his victory and Jo would have glared furiously at him. This time, he remained standing, eyes downcast and blank faced. In turn, Jo merely shrugged her shoulders and slumped down on her bench, eyes unseeing. As John headed back to his chambers, it hit him hard that she had never popped into his chambers, as she had always done. His eyes stared out of the window, eyes unseeing while Coope worked quietly in the background.
"Do you want any papers looking out for the Human Rights seminar, judge?" Coope asked brightly. This was her tactful way of trying to spark some life into the deeply troubled man who she could feel radiate his worries. "Pick the usual collection of papers I used last time. I'll check later if there is anything new that I need," John responded unenthusiastically.
In the past, John had headed off to such seminars with a spring in his step and a wicked gleam in his eye. He had benefitted immensely from the principles of equal opportunities , which had seen attractive lady judges and barristers demonstrate their slightly mixed devotion to the cause. Now that his domestic circumstances had changed, it focussed him to the job in hand. This time around, he was getting uncomfortably aware that he must be absent at a time when he could ill afford it. He was drumming his fingers on a side table when his phone rang. It took him a few seconds to pick it up and answer.
"Hi John. I haven't seen that much of you recently. All work and no play makes John a dull boy."
John's spirits leapt when he heard George's familiar drawl. He would love nothing more than her company right now.
"I would love to come over more than anything else in the world," he said with deep feeling." I hope you won't find me poor company, as I've got a lot on my mind right now"
"John darling, you should know better than to stay away. I'll cook dinner for you."
The world outside became illuminated by fresh light and hope for John. He badly needed to share his burden. He couldn't wait to get out of the court building and into his car while the imperturbable Coope volunteered to look after Mimi. Her main feeling was sheer relief that the judge had suddenly cheered up a lot.
As they lay back, peaceful and content after the meal, John snuggled up to George and laid his head on her shoulder while her fingers gently stroked his hair. She could tell that John needed simple affection and comfort from her tonight.
"Looking forward to tasting Italian pizza and setting the world to rights, John"
"As far as it goes but I am not entirely happy at the thought of going away"
George's lips curved in a smile at John's frank admission of being away from the two women in his life as opposed to his previous unabashed relish in tasting all the delights that conference life offered. She turned her head, took one glance at the troubled look on his face and enlightenment dawned.
"What's holding you back then, John"
"I will enjoy speaking my mind and creating a few waves. I don't mind admitting that I'll miss you not being around. What's really troubling me is that I'm really worried about Jo. I'm just very uncomfortable at the thought of being away right now."
George took it as read that John's feelings were equally balanced between her and Jo. It was just that Jo gave great cause for concern and she agreed that he certainly had every good reason to feel that way.
"Is that a gut feeling or is there something more to it than that"
"I'm a bit shy of admitting that I haven't much evidence to go on. I just have a bad feeling about going away. I seem to be in the habit of getting phone calls with bad news when I'm not physically around to deal with a crisis"
"Don't be shy, John. You're just not used to trusting to intuition. It flies in the face of all your learning, all your habits of a lifetime. There is a time and place for it, John ,I assure you of that."
George's tone of voice was utterly serious and reassured John. He didn't really like being overrun by vague fantasies, which appeared to have no basis in either fact or logic. He gave no answer to George but gently hugged her and he lay against her in the calm silence. George let a few moments pass before continuing her questions.
"So what makes you worried especially now"
"I'm sure that Jo has a drinking problem. The worst of it is that she's normally fine until she has some major upset in her life and then she drinks to excess. I can still remember the way she was knocking them back that evening when she came to my digs which gave rise to that PCC investigation"
That vivid mental image conjured up by John set the cogs revolving in George's mind. She recalled a brief exchange in the Barbara Mills trial just before Jo was due to interview Professor Ryan. She had seen how hungover Jo had been and had come straight to the point.
"Jo, getting drunk in the middle of a trial, that just isn't like you," she could remember saying to her and had overlooked Jo's throwaway line of "That's all you know." She had dismissed the words for so many reasons, because she had found Jo a formidable opponent in a court of law and because sensible Jo would not do anything as reckless as this. The truth was that she hadn't wanted to believe it.
"Have you talked about the matter to Jo"
George knew the answer instantly from the painfully long time it took for John to answer.
"I did try to get her to open up about the matter and failed spectacularly. She got very defensive about the whole matter and generally bit my ear off. She said that she knew far more about alcoholism than I did from when she had helped out her father who was a recovering alcoholic. I suppose that if she has had experience of the troubles that alcoholism brings, then logically speaking, she should know enough to steer clear from going the same way."
"Since when does logic come into the situation, John? Since when have my anorexic tendencies had anything to do with the 'logic' that you describe?"
There was a deadly logic in George's slowly articulated words that caused panic feelings to rise up in John. He clung all the more to George for need of comfort. The irony was not lost on him that, only a few months ago, he was the strong one, helping her come to terms with the operation for her breast cancer. He raised his head at last and looked into her eyes. There was a burning question that was uppermost in his mind. He had to ask George, there and then, as he knew that George would tell him the truth.
"So should I go to this conference, George? I feel really uncomfortable about going," John asked in an uncertain tone of voice.
"You go, John. You need a break. If anything happens that you should know of, literally anything, I'll be the first to tell you. Besides, I'm not alone as there is Karen who would help out if needs be."
"So you'll keep an eye on Jo and make sure that she's all right, George?" John persisted.
George knew well enough that this wasn't the high court judge asking questions which had been already answered, either directly or by inference. This was the worried human being, in need of reassurance that everything will be guaranteed to be all right.
"I promise, John. You go out there and give them hell. It's what you're best at."
It was a mixture of George's humour and the certainty that she would keep her word that finally made John decide to go. There was no choice.