45.

At about 2:00AM - as Arnold took his chance and kissed Helga on the roof - Phoebe and Gerald were sobering up in Hubie's over a plate of loaded tater tots. They were in a calm conversation about what the last two years had been like.

At 2:30AM - as Arnold and Helga were quickly forgetting that Grandpa had interrupted their evening - Phoebe and Gerald were saying sharp words about who pays attention to whom, who takes care of whom, who's responsible for whom(who?Whom?)!

At 3:15AM - just as Arnold was pulling Helga up and into his sleepy arms, just before they fell asleep - Gerald was admitting that he was so in love with Phoebe that there isn't a single thing she could do to push him away for good.

"That's just what I'm saying, Gerald!" Phoebe said with a soft smile on her face. "I am concerned about what you want - beyond my happiness -"

"And your body." Gerald added, making her giggle that late night giggle.

"Seriously! I'm serious." Phoebe said, grabbing his hands.

"I know. I know you're right." He said, "I've been thinking a lot - and I think - I know I've been fixated on you. I mean look at you!"

"Gerald!"

"Yeah - I know. I've started to wonder if I…" He trailed off, a tired look on his brow.

"What?"

"I don't think I know what I want to do anymore…"

"Sports management -" Phoebe started.

"Yeah - I don't know if that's - I don't even remember why I wanted it in the first place." Gerald finally looked back up and met her eye.

"Oh." Phoebe just sat and looked back. Then her breath caught in her throat.

"No - no tears." Gerald said sweetly. "It's not your fault."

By 4:00AM, the young couple had talked through several stacks of their fears. Phoebe tried to offer solutions, suggestions - but of course nothing was going to get solved tonight.

By 4:30AM Phoebe and Gerald were cackling with laughter over nothing really, just being tired, being young, and being in love.

And by 5:17AM they were both sitting on the same side of the booth, eating a fresh order of french fries. Gerald slipped his arm around Phoebe's shoulders and she leaned into him.

"Hey," Gerald said softly, prompting Phoebe to look up into his eyes. Looking down at her puffy sleepy eyes, he smiled and leaned in. They shared a perfect small kiss that sank into something deeper and needier - until finally they split in a small gasp. "Maybe we should get out of here," Gerald said with his eyes closed, forehead pressed to Phoebe's.

"Yes, I think you're right."

46.

Right around 4:45AM - just as Phoebe and Gerald were ordering the latest order of fries - Helga G. Pataki was waking up.

Half naked.

In Arnold's bed!

Laying in a mess of blankets and limbs, Helga was clutching the blankets to her chest while she stared at Arnold's soft expression in sleep. But, unlike you might imagine, she was not absolutely drunk on a loving bliss. No - she was hyperventilating.

I have GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE! She darted her eyes around the room, trying to wrangle her brain into some kind of control. First - I need CLOTHES!

Now, it isn't that Helga regretted a single thing about the night before. No - of course not! What are you stupid? No - as Helga lay there staring at her love she could not push away the terrible and toxic thought that maybe - maybe more than likely - when Arnold wakes up - he'll regret it. Regret everything and be mortified to find Helga G. Pataki in his bed.

And that - she just couldn't take that.

So, it follows, that she had to get the fuck out of there. Ok, ok! What is the plan? First, slip out of the bed without waking him. Second, she had to get to the clothes Arnold pulled for her last night, in the dark - quietly. Then, get dressed, in the dark, quietly! And Finally - She will have to get to the ladder on the bed (without waking him), climb the ladder without tripping (so she doesn't wake him), and open the window, hoist herself out, and close the window ever so softly (WITHOUT WAKING HIM). Then all she has to do is climb down the fire escape, drop down into the alley, and run all the way home.

Oh she should probably find her phone, cigarettes, and shoes too.

Ok! Ok! I got this. All I gotta do is sit up sloooooowly and -

"Hey - "

FUCK!

Helga whipped her head around to see Arnold smiling up at her from his pillow. Then, before Helga could think of freaking out or running off, she felt him lay his hand gently on her bare back.

"H-hey…" Helga said, her voice getting caught in her throat.

"You ok?" Arnold said, sensing something. He started to sit up. The movement prompted Helga to shift further away.

"Y-yeah, yes." She said and now was turned around to face Arnold. She had the blanket twisted and wrapped around her now, choking her legs.

"Helga - " He said. "What's going on?" Arnold leaned forward to touch her again - but this movement sparked the fuse. Helga wretched and wriggled and fell out of the bed. "Oh my -"

"Ha I'm fine - fine! Yeah - " Helga gasped and tried to laugh and was frantically trying to detangle her legs from the fabric.

"What are you-"

"Nothing - you know-" Helga was now crawling and pawing through the dark looking for the sweat pants and the flannel. Arnold turned on a reading light, revealing Helga's whole ass as she searched. She jumped quickly, having found the clothes and was now hastily putting everything on.

"Helga - hey -" He was getting up and approaching carefully. But she acted like she didn't see him and darted past him back toward the bed, the ladder. She had decided against saving her phone, her cigarettes - fuck her shoes. She just had to get out of here.

"HELGA!" Arnold finally shouted and grabbed her by the ankle as she started up the ladder. She didn't stop though. She didn't say anything. She just kept pulling.

So he had no choice - he was climbing onto his bed and just managed to wrap one arm around her waist and pulled. The two bodies fell through the air for just a moment and slammed back into the bed.

"OOF!" Helga said, squeezing her eyes tight shut - but she didn't stop wriggling.

"Stop it. Helga! Stop it!" Arnold was twisting and fighting back until he trapped Helga's arms at her side and laid all of his weight on top of her. "STOP!"

Helga finally settled and was still. She was just looking back up at him, breathing hard, red in the face, saying nothing. Her silence was unsettling. It really freaked him out actually - he almost rather her be screaming at him. He was searching his tired mind - for anything to say…

"Did I do something?" He asked. It was so sincere and so fearful, Helga let a few tears drop before she finally gasped.

"No! No - of course not. You idiot!"

"Then what are you doing?"

"Leaving!"

"Why!?"

"Because!" She suddenly popped one arm out of his grip and then the other.

"No, Helga! Don't do that - don't shut me out now! After all the shit we just put our friends through? Just tell me what you're thinking!" They were separated now, but Arnold was standing on his bed in front of the ladder. If she wanted to leave she'd have to go through him - or run through the house. She might do that, but he had a moment before she'd make that decision he thought.

Helga was standing too, breathing hard.

"I just -" she started and stopped again.

"Yeah?"

"I can't - "

"What?"

"I've overstayed my welcome. I've put you through enough. I'm sorry - " she said this all stoically. Straight forward and well paced. But he could see how hard she was working not to scream in his face.

"Ok - hey." Arnold took a step forward, trying to not scare her into another scuffle. "You have nothing to be sorry for." He got close enough to touch her and he held his hands out, but didn't make contact yet. She was still just staring back into his eyes, brow furrowed in uncertainty.

"If you want to leave - ok. I will give you a ride home. But if you are leaving because you think I don't want you here," he said, watching her face carefully for a sign he had it right. "That's wrong. I want you to stay. Seriously." He finally pushed forward enough and touched her shoulders. At his touch she let out a kind of relieved breath. "Do you believe me?" He made sure he had her eyes now. She gave a small nod.

Arnold slid his palms up her shoulders, to her neck, to cup her face. She held his eye contact and her knees seemed to give way. They sank to kneeling on the bed together.

"Can I kiss you?" Arnold risked. He couldn't think of what else to do - this seemed like the best way to say what he meant. For a brief moment he thought it was all over - but then - Helga lurched forward and pressed her lips to his heavily.

Oh, my sweet… he - he wants me here. It was almost too much to handle.

The kiss was warm and clumsy and they slid all the way back to the bed till Helga was lying on Arnold's chest. As they broke apart, Arnold wrapped his arms tight around Helga's back.

"Oof!" Helga said with the impact, "Watch it football head," she laughed.

"Sorry," he smiled and loosened his grip. "I was afraid you were going to make another escape attempt." They both laughed and Helga buried her face in his neck.

"Don't be so clingy, Arnoldo," she whispered with a smile. Arnold chuckled into her hair.

"So you don't want to cuddle?" Arnold said, eyebrows raised, daring her to agree. He started to pull his arm out from under her head. "Ok, then."

But at the first movement, Helga's reflexes were quicker than her pride. She gripped at his shoulder and stopped him. Arnold looked down at the tug and met Helga's eye. They both think about making a joke, saying something, filling the silence. But instead - they just sat there. Arnold looked into Helga's blue eyes and took a sweet breath. They sighed together and sunk deeper into the bed just looking at each other. Their blinks were getting slower and slower until they fell back asleep.

47.

Gerald and Phoebe were also wrapped up together at that moment. But things were a little… steamier in Phoebe's room.

Seated on her bed, Gerald held a naked Phoebe in his lap. They were moving together in a comfortable, knowing way. Gerald let a low growl slip, prompting Phoebe to smile and cover his mouth.

"Quiet," she smiled.

"I am," he said, biting his lip. "But you are making it very hard to stay quiet."

"I know," Phoebe replied, closing her eyes and gasping slightly and Gerald pulled on her hips. "So are you!" she whispered sharply then kissed him again.

They were going to be ok. They knew it. For now anyway.

48.

Helga woke up in Arnold's room… again. But this time, Arnold was nowhere to be seen. A small voice in Helga's head yelled RUN! But she tried to resist. She pulled her flannel tight around when a scent hit her nose. This wasn't hers - that's right! She had pulled Arnold's shirt on in the dark.

Oooh she sighed internally, this scent! The scent of my beloved envelopes me in an ethereal shroud of sensation. All other senses dull so that I may now exist only for this incredible sacred scent!

"You look cozy," Arnold said, knocking Helga from her reverie. She found that she had fallen on her face and wrapped herself in a knot of blankets in her effort to absorb the flannel into her skin. She was essentially cocooned and trapped. "I brought coffee."

He kicked his door closed with a thud.

"Shh!" Helga said as she tried to extricate herself.

"It's ok," he said, putting a tray with two coffees and a couple bowls of creamers and sugars. "Grandma made it very clear that she knew you were up here."

"WHAT?" Helga said, as she flipped out of bed, terribly tangled beyond relief.

"Jesus, Helga." Arnold said as he rushed to help her out of her trap. "How did you even - uh - oh sorry." They both pulled back instinctually as Helga's shirt came away with the last twist of the blankets. Helga jumped to close the shirt and cover her chest, Arnold turned away sharply, blushing.

"Oh - Hey - ha. Look at that. Sorry there, football head. Didn't mean to flash ya!"

Now they both knew that they had literally spent all night together, both of them half naked and touching - cuddling, really! They knew that. But it didn't matter. Somehow, in the morning light, they returned to being distant and singular individuals with no knowledge of each other's bodies. Now, they were blushing feverishly and facing opposite walls.

"No - I'm sorry. I didn't mean to - do you want some coffee?" He got up and darted to his desk. "Cream? Sugar?"

Helga was getting her breathing under control and fully buttoning the shirt - collar to the last button - before turning around. "Two creams please…" she said in as measured a way as possible.

"Here you go…" Arnold said, slowly turning around. He handed her a warm, round bellied mug, with the perfect shade of coffee swirling inside.

"Thanks - " Helga said. She leaned back casually on his desk. In a moment of coffee silence, Arnold took Helga in over his mug. She was lanky and pale - her hair was mussed and sticking up in places - her brow was furrowed and her knuckles were tense around the mug. Then his gaze wandered down to her legs, the flannel was long on her but her thighs were still fairly exposed. He ripped his gaze away again in a heat of blush.

What is wrong with me? Arnold wondered and turned to take a seat on the bed. We were just - I mean. It's just Helga. I feel so fucking nervous… what the -

"So they know I'm here?" Helga said, now looking up at him.

"Yeah - ha. Um - Grandma kept talking about an Elanore." Helga's mind zipped to an old memory. Another instance where she found herself waking up in Arnold's house, at Arnold's table, having morning tea with Arnold's grandma. "But then she described you - and I took a chance."

"Oh god - I'll just get my shit together." Helga said. She didn't want to get him in trouble or for any parents to try to speak about their teens and inappropriate behavior.

"No - no -she said. I mean if you want to go - like I said - I'll take you. But - um - she said it was fine. She's making breakfast! Really!"

"Oh - ok." They both sipped their coffee and in a silent agreement decided to stay where they were for now.

"Why - um - " Arnold started.

"What?" Helga asked. She knew though - that they had finally hit the wall. The one she was afraid of. The one that threatened all the time they had stolen together.

"Why is this so awkward?" He managed. Yep - there it was. Helga nodded and swallowed hard.

"Because it's us," she said with a kind of sadness. Her tone pulled his attention. No, no he thought.

"What does that mean?" He asked.

"Come on, Arnold."

"Come on what?" He said, pushing back. "You think this - us -"

"Yeah, dude. We're a weird match," Helga's throat was going dry. "Of course it's awkward."

"I don't think - I don't feel weird about - I just think."

"Yes! You do feel weird - how could you not!" She could feel a rage bubbling.

"No! I don't feel weird about last night - I already told you."

"Can I ask you a question?" She said roughly. She turned to face him directly. The young voice in her head was screaming at her to stop. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth. Don't question what is happening. Just tell him the truth. Confess and let all the awkwardness go and be together and in love forever. But Helga couldn't do any of that because she knew better. She knew what hormones and fairy lights and romantic crap like the night before did to teenagers. She knew how easily Arnold could get swept up in this shit. And she just couldn't take it. She couldn't take it if she let herself live in this fantasy for another minute for it to come crashing down in two days, a week, a month. If she let herself think it was going to work - the end would be so much worse. She should cut her losses and take this memory home to cherish in secret like she always had before.

Arnold was staring up at her with a weariness that made her sad. "Of course."

"You asked me to Homecoming," she said flatly.

"That's not a question."

"You asked me to Homecoming!"

"Yes."

"On Purpose?"

"What do you mean?" He looked confused.

"Like - one second you are going on and on about Jeremy asking me out."

"Yeah - but that was before I knew he was a tool," Arnold blurted out.

"Wait - " she tried to stop him, but -

"I mean - " Arnold realized he had never disclosed his little interaction. "He should've asked you out - but - "

"Did you only ask me out because you felt bad for me?!" There - she said it.

"What?" Arnold was losing the train of the conversation now.

"He didn't ask me out - you felt bad - so you asked me out."

"After last night - you're still questioning if I like you?" He stood up, wanting to walk up to her, to grab her. But something kept him in place. Pride, maybe.

"Just answer the question!" Helga crossed her arms in a protective way.

"What question?!" Arnold threw his hands up/

"Was I a pity date?" There it was. She said it out loud. She needed to know even if she didn't want to. There was a pause. Arnold had his head in one hand. God! Helga knew it.

She was about to turn and gather her shit, when he said "Jesus! No! not even close." He said it loudly. Clearly. She stopped in her tracks.

"B-But you weren't going to ask me before he didn't!" A desperation was creeping into her voice.

"Oh my god!" Arnold broke from his spot now, pacing back and forth.

"Arnold! Please ex-"

"Ok - So! Right, I wasn't originally going to ask you -" Helga was about to interject, yell back. But he got there first. "- But I wasn't going to ask anyone! THEN - yeah - Jeremy didn't ask you. Well - he actually said -"

"Said? Did you talk to him?" She finally cut in.

"I mean - yeah," he admitted.

"You are such a busybody!"

"He's a dick - I regret nothing!" Arnold stopped pacing and faced her head on again.

"What did he fucking say?"

"He said - well, he said w-was going to ask Nadine."

"What else?"

"What do you mean?" He was getting flustered. Conversation was flowing again, thankfully, but this wasn't the babbling brook he would have preferred. White rapids is what he got.

"He said something else - I can tell you're holding back."

"No -" he didn't want to -

"MOTHERFUCKER!"

"OK! Ok - he said." Arnold took a breath. It wasn't that she couldn't hear this - it was all just so close to everything he felt. Ok - gotta do it. Here we go - "Well he said that you're great - cuz you are - but he also said you were a little too much. And - And I told him he probably wasn't man enough or whatever and that's when I knew he was a tool and not worth your time."

"So it was a pity date." Helga set back on her hip. Nostrils flaring.

"HELGA!"

"What?"

"NO! Ok - so he said that bullshit. I stayed back to make sure he just fucked off. Then you gave me that book - which I love by the way - and I spent the whole next day thinking. About You. Thinking about how much - how fun the day had been and how you really see me and talk to me and make me feel seen - I guess. And I realized that I feel - I mean I really think that - that I see you too and that if stupid fucking Jeremy couldn't see you that was his loss…And my gain." Arnold gasped, out of breath.

Helga just stood there taking it in. Trying to parse through everything he had just said. But then Arnold inhaled again. He wasn't done.

"All that is to say, that that dumbass just made me realize that I had - have a - crush on - you…" He wanted to see something - anything on her face. But she was stone so he kept going. "So - I asked you out. On purpose! Because I wanted to. Period. End of Story! Ok?"

He swallowed and decided he had to close the distance between them. He walked forward, slowly, but confidently. Once he was in kissing distance, he reached out, brushed a hair behind her ear and lingered on her cheek. He was searching for more words, to make it all ok, but she spoke first.

"You have a crush on me?" Helga said. She needed to hear it again. To know again…

"Yeah - isn't it obvious!" He laughed - finally! She didn't, though, so he started to pull his hand away.

Before he could slide away from her, before she let him go, Helga grabbed onto his hand and turned her face into it and kissed his palm. She was breathing hard now - trying not to explode. Her ears were ringing and heat was rising in her face. Arnold didn't know all that was going on - but he knew something. He knew that his stomach did another flip as her lips pressed into his hand. He knew that he was melting into her and, even better, he was watching her melt into him. He knew that it felt very very good and very strangely right.

As she was melting, he pulled her into him and turned her face to meet his eye.

"Do you - " He started. But she couldn't let him ask it. Because if he did she might just say it all - so she kissed him instead.

The kiss had all the electricity of the night before wrapped up inside it. They were both buzzing as he slid his hand to the nape of her neck. She hummed ever so slightly in a sweet happiness. She caught her breath, pulled away but only a little and said, "isn't it obvious?"

After a long smiling moment, in which they felt that awkward wall fall away, Arnold finally said, "NO! You make things very confusing and complicated!"

She was laughing now too.