G DAY!
I hope you all had a really cool Chrissie and a great New Year. I've been at the beach! And now I'm back to reality and updating. The aim is to update ALL my stories before my b day (7th of Jan). I would have updated yesterday but coughs CERTAIN- MALES-AT-COLES-GAVE-ME-A-BLODDY-NOSE! And I was dizzy ;D NE WAY! Thanks for the reviews lol I know it's a really stupid story but like I'm stupid so it fits, and I can't see myself writing anything BUT stupid fics. SO ENJOY!
Disclaimer: Don't own anything……….
Oh just a warning, some of the things Bakura does with the dog in this chappi and some of the words used aren't well lets just say its kinda grose. U HAVE BEEN WARNED!
The Adventures of Bakura and Hot Dogs
Before:
"LEAVE ME ALONE I DIDN'T STEAL HER KID!" he screamed
The dog watched as his master was being bashed rapidly by men trying to pin him down. Hot Dogs then ran up and yelped again. But done nothing. It then done something unexpected…..
Now:
Bakura wasn't about to give up, and on the other hand neither were the police. The dog lifted up its leg before Bakura, who recently punched a police officer, saw this and raised an eyebrow
"It's a boy!" he yelled looking at the dog
The police stopped as they felt wetness on their body, form sum unknown thing.
"What the?"
the police all turned around in confusion, the wrestling stopping suddenly.
"OH! That's just nasty! Sir please control your dog!" yelled a police officer at Bakura who was cracking up laughing
"PISS HOT DOG PISS!" Bakura yelled as the police officers began to wipe the piss off em, and off the floor.
The dog began to bark and Bakura managed to get to his feet as the police officers stumbled and tried to run after the boy, though failing because they were slipping over due to the wetness on the ground, caused by the dog who was shaking his leg.
"SIR STOP NOW!" yelled one of the police
Bakura picked up the dog and began to bolt with it down the hall…
"HOT DOGS!" Bakura yelled laughing running past tanks and smiling.
"I NEVER KNEW YOU WERE A GUY!"
Bakura stood in front of his dog in the backyard and walked in front of him.
"Due to the sudden circumstances we are no longer allowed in the aquarium" he said walking around in circles around the dog.
"And because you are a boy. We will have to find you a girl dog because you need a girl to have a baby…I think…."
Bakura held out his trusty dog guide and turned it upside down….
"Dm dum Food, water, brushing ahh!..BREEDING!" he said happily
He pretended to read it and smiled
"Just as I though we need to find you a girlfriend!" he said smiling
The dog barked
"OF CORSE THEY WOULD BE ATTRACTED TO YOU!" he yelled patting him
"Remember you're my dog? Automatically any property of Bakura is sexy"
The dog barked again
"No, that does not include Ryou…
AT HOME!
Bakura sat on the lounge patting his dog, watching TV. He smiled as he saw that annoying kid on the "OREO " add with his stupid dog. Telling him how "Chocolate wasn't good for dogs, and milk was"
Bakura laughed
"What a load of bullshit" he mumbled to himself
He turned to his dog, and laughed.
"Chocolate is good for dogs right?"
The dog barked
"I thought so!" Bakura took a bite from last weeks ham and a sip of root beer.
"Stupid kid doesn't know jack shit, I mean who wants milk?" he told the dog.
The dog looked at him and began to lick his hand.
"You know what Hot Dog you're a good listener. I can tell you anything and you won't laugh at me….Unlike Ryou"
The dog looked at him with a glare. With that Bakura held out the ham and smiled.
"Wanna bite?"
The Dog automatically began to tare the ham apart.
"Wow your hungry aren't you little fella, well that could be because of the whole aquarium thing. Boy I'm so proud of you, you're a regular pisser! Just like your old man!" he said looking at the dog tare the ham to pieces.
Bakura took a sip of root bear and put the bottle in front of the dog.
"Drink?" he asked
The dog began to lick the rim of the bottle…the part where you put your mouth. Bakura shrugged as he took the root beer away and began to drink again.
THAT NIGHT! In the bathroom.
Bakura held the dog as he looked at his pearly white teeth.
"How are your teeth?" he asked the dog who was looking in the mirror.
He put Hot Dogs in the sink and opened the poor dog's mouth.
"Say ahhh" Bakura said sticking his toothbrush down the through of the dog, just like dentists have done on TV shows.
The dog made a sad and unpleasant noise
"Oh stop complaining! I've seen it on movies 100 times! You can trust me!" He said moving hi toothbrush around his mouth.
The dog pulled his mouth out and growled at Bakura
"Ok! OK! You're not a dental person" he sighed.
Bakura then shakily put some toothpaste on HIS OWN toothbrush and looked at hotdogs in a way that would make any person feel a bit queasy
"Just say ahhhhhhhhhh once more. Ryou said to me it's important that you clean your teeth or bad people like the Pharaoh start to live in them. You don't want that do you?" he asked smiling
The dog looked at him form inside the bathroom sink
"I thought not" and with that the tomb robber grabbed his mouth and began to brush the dogs teeth…
SOON AFTER
"SPIT!" Bakura said happily
The dog was going frantic and Bakura got some water and cleaned out his mouth
"GOOD BOY!" he said patting him after the torture was over.
Soon after that Bakura got the toothbrush he just used and began to use it for his own teeth, now really giving a shit he had just shared a toothbrush with a dog!
Bakura walked out of the door with Hot Dogs and walked into the kitchen passing Ryou.
"Oh look Hot Dogs its Ryou" he said sarcastically
Ryou looked up and smiled
"Hello Bakura, Hello Hot Dogs"
"Say hello" Bakura said using Hot Dog's paw to wave
"Hello Hot Dogs" Ryou said kindly and laughing at the same time
Ryou smiled
"Bakura I have good news! I called the vet and he said we can have Hot Dogs De- sexed the day after tomorrow if we are lucky" Ryou said
"De Sexed?" Bakura asked confused
"Yeah, its when uhhh its when, the dog's thing is kind of "handled with" so he can't go around and having babies" he said blushing a bit
Bakura was in shock
"YOU'RE GOING TO CUT HIS DICK OFF!" he screamed at the top of his lungs.
Ryou sighed
"No Bakura his not..
"HOW COULD YOU DO THIS? ALL HOT DOGS DONE WAS LIKE YOU AND THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY HIM! CUTTING THE ONLY THING HE HAS PRIDE IN OFF!" he yelled
Ryou sighed
"Bakura hear me out…
Bakura hugged Hot Dogs
"If you get his dick off…then YOUR GONNA HAVE TO GET MINE OFF TOO!" he said holding the dog tight.
Ryou laughed
"Bakura, listen to me!" he said calmly
"GOOD DAY TO YOU SIR!" Bakura said storming upstairs and into his room, slamming the door.
He put the puppy on his bed and lye on it himself.
"I can't believe Ryou wants to do that to you boy! It's like chopping off girls boobs! They have so much pride in them!" he said looking at his roof.
The dog walked over and began to lick his face. Bakura just letting him go.
/What do I do? With Hot Dogs dick gone, I can't get him to have babies! And then those babies can't beat the shit out of the Pharaoh and that means I'm at square one/ he thought to himself.
He looked at the dog
"Don't worry Hot dogs, I promise I wont let mean old Ryou even touch you. Ill talk to Marik and ask him. Well get you laid before you can count to elephant ok?"
The dog looked at him with those huge eyes
"Yes I promise, tomorrow you and a lucky lady are gonna be jacking off one another!" he said smiling
Bakura looked up and undone the covers to his bed before taking off his top and lying down on the mattress.
"DO you need pj's? Because I stole some of the pharaohs" he said smiling at the memory of the Pharaoh being tortured.
The dog wagged his tail
"OK"
He turned off the light and cradled into his bed and put Hot Dogs on the pillow next to him.
"Don't worry Hot Dogs, I promise you'll have sex in no time..But where?"
The dog lye down in silence as Bakura though
Suddenly it hit him
"A DOG SHOW THERE ARE PLENTY OF GIRLS THERE!"
He turned over looking at the dog
"Tomorrow, you, me and Marik are going to a dog show!
DONE!
Hope you liked it…well at least a bit. Please review, because I'm gonna tough well try to any way. It's my b day on sat so please be nice, ill review as son as I can! But again the only way ill review is if you press the little purple button! PPPLLLLEEEAAAASSSEEEEEEEEE
OK until then all
Hoo roo
"THAT'S GOLD!"