What I Want
Luna Lovegood wanted to scream.
She wanted to yell, she wanted to run, she wanted to hide and never be found.
Never.
He just wouldn't leave her alone!
"Wandering out late again, Lovegood?" He asked lazily twirling his wand between his fingers. His soft brown eyes weren't staring at his wand, that was now moving in his fingers lazily, elegantly and authoritatively, his eyes were watching her.
She blushed. His eyes always made her blush.
"I should probably take points."
Luna said nothing but began watching the floor. Watching his eyes made her feel funny.
That was the only way she could describe it.
"Or give you detention…"
Luna resisted the urge to pull out her hair. Couldn't he just decide on something and send her to her dormitory?
"Hmm…"
Luna lifted her head. "Well?"
His eyes regarded her questioningly. He still hadn't stopped twirling his wand.
"Can I go now?"
He raised an eyebrow "Go?"
"To my dormitory."
The corner of his lips twitched upward as if amused by what she'd said.
Luna couldn't find a single funny thing about what she'd said. Why he found it amusing was beyond her. She sighed. "So?"
He said nothing but continued watching her.
Luna felt herself blushing horribly. Who in their right mind decided to make him Head Boy? Honestly. She fidgeted, his gaze making her distinctly uncomfortable, which was odd since no one had every truly made her uncomfortable.
Never.
But every time he looked at her she could feel that stupid nervous feeling succumb her entire body.
And he was beginning to do that a lot.
She would be reading happily in the library and then as if someone had turned on a switch she could suddenly feel him watching her. Feel him looking at her when she hadn't even known he was there. She would look around and sure enough there he was, watching her with that supercilious smirk and God-awful light brown eyes.
Everywhere she went she found him staring at her. And most of the time that was all he did – watch her.
If she were Ginny Weasley she would've said he was doing it to make her uncomfortable. If she were Lavender Brown she would've said he was doing it because he wanted something. If she were Hermione Granger she would've said he was doing it because he was a stupid Slytherin. If she were any of those women it wouldn't have bothered her.
But she was Luna Lovegood and while she had no idea why he was doing it, she did know it bothered her a lot.
"You squirm a lot when you're nervous, Lovegood." He muttered nonchalantly as if it was something he'd just realised.
Luna bit her lip. This was getting tiring and annoying and it was really taking a toll on her feet. Today was an excellent day to don heels. They were murdering her and he didn't seem any closer to letting her leave.
Why had she worn them in the first place?
Oh, right, it was her dare.
It wasn't a very good dare anyway. She'd been playing Truth or Dare with the Gryffindors. Not a very inventive lot... The girls just knew she hated heels so they thought it would be funny to make her wear heels.
It was NOT funny.
They were too tall, they pinched her feet, plus in this entire day she'd fallen four times.
Heels were the epitome of all evil.
She shifted her feet hoping that would dull the pain.
"You're wearing heels." Blaise muttered
Luna glanced at him. He was staring at her feet with a raised eyebrow. "Were it up to me I wouldn't."
He raised his head and watched her face carefully. "Up to you…?"
"It's a dare."
He scoffed. "Heels? Not a very creative dare."
"I never said it was." Luna looked at him. He was currently watching her heels with an expression much like disgust.
She didn't think they were that bad.
Well looks-wise anyway. Worn on feet they were terrible but if she would ever buy heels she would buy some that looked sort of like the ones she was wearing.
Not that she would ever buy heels. "They're not that ugly."
He looked up then smirked that smug smirk of his. "I never said they were."
Luna sighed. "I guess."
His brown eyes glittered.
How did he find her funny? She was not funny.
"So you like the heels?"
"No." she grumbled "They're stupid and make my feet throb. Who walks around on a small stick connected to a shoe? It's very unstable."
His eyes seemed to shine even more if possible.
"I'm never wearing heels again."
"Most girls love heels."
"So?"
He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall never taking his eyes off of her.
Luna squirmed. "What!"
He raised an eyebrow.
Luna felt like jumping up and down. "What do you want!"
Yup, it was definite. Whoever decided to make Blaise Zabini Head Boy must have been drunk.
She was not used to this much attention from a Slytherin.
Frankly she wasn't used to this much attention from anyone. Most of the time everyone just ignored her. The fact that made this whole thing more disturbing was the fact that not only was Blaise Zabini in Slytherin, he was popular.
Very popular.
And very handsome.
He had that gorgeous dark chocolate skin, with his unbearably messy black hair, and those almond-ish brown eyes that were constantly staring at her.
Why he would be watching her like he did was just…weird.
And unnerving.
"What do I want?" He asked with that superior drawl. His wand had never stopped spinning in-between his fingers. In and out. "Do you really want to know, Lovegood?"
Luna opened her mouth about to reply that she did when she realised she didn't know if she wanted to know. She just wanted for him to very much go away. He was making her very uneasy. "Not really. I just wish you would leave me alone."
He stopped in mid-twirl regarded her slowly as if measuring something then resumed twirling his wand. "Huh."
"What?"
He slipped his wand in his back pocket and moved toward her so he was close enough that she could feel the warmth radiating from his body. He looked down at her face. "If that's what you really want, then we want very different things." He lifted his hand to her face. He didn't touch her, his hand merely lingered in the air while his eyes seemed to be calculating something. He dropped his hand. "Fifteen points from Ravenclaw" He started to walk away.
"Okay." She muttered not moving from her position watching him walk away.
He turned. "By the way, Lovegood, I always get what I want."
xXxXx
Luna drummed her fingers on the cover of a book contemplating something. What did he mean by them wanting very different things?
Luna didn't know but her heart fluttered every time she recalled how close he'd been. That was the closest any boy had ever been to her.
Not that it meant something.
He was after all Blaise Zabini.
He was very handsome, rich, snobby and very much a Slytherin. Nothing could ever truly happen, no matter how much she kept imagining something happen.
She hadn't seen him for two entire days. Three if she counted today, but today wasn't over so…
That was what she had wanted.
For him to leave. Go. Quit staring at her.
And that's what happened. Luna bit her lip. Right. Yes, of course that's what she wanted. She was much happier now.
Well, not happy.
And not relieved.
She was…just a little sad.
Only a little though!
Luna groaned. Like that made it any better. She had a crush on Blaise Zabini; it was pathetic. She fancied someone who would never fancy her, someone who frankly would never even like her as a friend.
Lovely.
Luna picked up the book and slid it back in the bookcase. The library was depressing. She needed to go outside. Yes. That would clear her head.
As if a silly little crush could be cured with fresh air.
Luna reached the sparkling pond and lay down next to it. She dipped her right hand in the water and moved it about slowly making ripples on the surface of the glassy water. She lay like that for awhile making short-lived designs in the water.
"Lovegood, if I felt like it, I could nudge you with my foot and you'd fall in the pond."
Luna stiffened. She glanced in the direction of the voice.
She was torn between an impossible burst of joy and a terrible sort of fear. She was slightly afraid of him. Was that even normal? Luna found it particularly ridiculous that she could be afraid of a guy she fancied all because of his steadfast eyes.
A thought wriggled into the back of her mind. It probably frightened her because no one, with the exception of herself watched people anymore. They never watched period. Very few even listened.
She drifted her attention back to the ripples. "You don't feel like it."
She could almost see his smile. "Not yet, I don't."
He sat down next to her. Luna blushed feeling his brown eyes on her. She lifted her hand from the water and flicked the small drops of water in his direction.
Blaise blinked and wiped the droplets from his face.
"Stop it." She muttered softly dipping her hand back in the pond
"Stop what? You're the one that threw water at me."
"Stop staring at me."
He smirked. "I've left you alone for two whole days; surely I am entitled to look at you."
"Go look at Ginny." She mumbled quietly
He scoffed. "Her? Please."
"Please what?"
"You're far more interesting."
Luna blushed again. She just couldn't understand it. Not two minutes ago she'd been sad because he wasn't anywhere in sight and now that he was right next to her staring at her with those gorgeous brown eyes of his she felt absolutely on edge. Luna had no idea what she wanted.
He continued staring at her. Not saying a word. Just watching.
Luna had stopped dragging her hand in the water; she was now trying to look at anything anywhere as long as it wasn't him.
It was very difficult.
She gave in and looked at him. His soft brown eyes were trained on her face. They were kind and Luna thought that his eyes looked rather…hungry. Like they were longing for something. "Are you hungry?" she asked
Blaise smiled a small smile one so subtle and discreet she was hard-pressed to say it was a smile and not just his usual smirk. But his eyes were smiling. "Not for what you're thinking of."
Luna frowned. "What does that mean?"
He merely smirked in response.
Luna frowned again and watched the pond. Was it just that he was cryptic and noncommittal or were all Slytherins like that? "Are you always so evasive?"
"Evasive?"
"You never answer any questions and you never really say anything."
He smirked.
Luna sighed and stared at the pond again. After a bit Luna began to feel irritated again. He hadn't stopped staring at her. Luna sat up and faced him. "What do you want?" she asked earnestly and tiredly
"You've asked me that already."
"And you never told me the answer."
"Because you said you didn't want to know." He said pointedly watching her curiously.
Luna placed her hands in her lap and stared at them.
She had short small fingers. The nails were bitten to a quick and the bright orange nail polish she put on them was starting to peel off. Even her fingers were ugly.
Why couldn't he just leave her alone!
"Why won't you leave me alone! I'm not pretty like Ginny. I'm not interesting like Lavender. And I'm not smart like Hermione. What do you want!" she cried her eyes filling with tears. "What do you want?" she whispered still staring at her hands.
He wiped her cheek with his thumb. "Don't cry. No one is worth it for you to cry" He grasped her chin firmly and pulled her face up. "You're smart. If you aren't smart then do tell me why you're in Ravenclaw? So you aren't as smart as the Muggle-born. What does that matter? Who wants to be like her anyway? You're plenty interesting, otherwise I wouldn't be wasting my time with you. And you're pretty." He smiled. "Especially your eyes." Blaise sighed letting go of her chin "As for what I want… " His brown eyes stared into hers. "Do you really want to know?"
Luna blinked. "Yes." She whispered very softly.
"I want you. That's what I want."
Luna's eyed widened. "…Me?"
Blaise placed his hand on her cheek and drew her to him. "I'm going to kiss you now." He whispered this softly, his lips inches away from hers, the warmth of his breath touching her skin. Then he pressed his lips onto hers.
Luna felt as if the world had stopped. Her heart was beating like mad and she could feel her eyes open wide to a width she'd previously thought impossible.
Blaise Zabini was…He was kissing…her.
Luna then did the most logical thing she could think of.
Actually it was the only thing she could think of.
She kissed him back.
Luna pulled away every single thing connected to her lips tingling unbearably. Her heart was still beating a mile a minute and her mind seemed to have kicked back into action and was thinking a million thoughts at once. "I…" she said breathlessly unsure of what she wanted to say. "I…"
Blaise smirked and held her hand. He stroked her left hand with his thumb. "You, what?"
"Um, don't…forget…can't speak."
"Clearly."
"…You're Blaise Zabini."
"Yes, I know that." He looked at her curiously
"I'm Luna Lovegood."
He raised an eyebrow. "Does this have a point? Because I was already aware of whom you were and who I was.
"How could you like me?"
He shrugged then kissed her again. "Do you like me?"
"Yes."
"Then I don't think how or why really matters."
Luna stared at him. "Okay…" she whispered
"Besides, I don't much very like other girls. They're all so…dull."
"I'm not interesting."
Blaise smiled. "I beg to differ. You're very interesting. I mean, I've never met a girl who calls heels unstable. You're different."
Luna eyed him with an odd look. "I think you're a little crazy."
"I don't mind," Blaise kissed her softly. "Luna, you're still too close to the pond."
She frowned "What?"
Which Blaise responded by pushing her slightly with his hand causing Luna to fall into the pond.
Luna swam to the surface to be greeted with a pair of shining light-brown eyes. "That was not nice."
"I warned you before." He smiled holding out his hand. "Here let me help you up."
Luna grabbed his hand and gave it a tug, causing him to fall in as well.
Blaise sputtered. "This is what I get for being nice!"
"Nice! You pushed me in!" Luna laughed
Blaise swam toward her. "I should punish you for that. After all, I am head boy."
"What sort of punishment do you want to give me?"
Blaise leaned forward. "I just don't know. What do I want…?"
Luna smiled, unused to this friendly teasing.
"Did I ever tell you I always get what I want?"
"I think you've mentioned it before."
Blaise kissed her softly.
Luna smiled. Okay, so maybe whoever made Blaise Head Boy wasn't totally drunk, maybe they were just…a little drunk.
A/N: To make up for the fact that I haven't updated Pulling at Strings in a while I decided to write this and post this up. I will get around to updating the fic, I know I'm a liar, but I promise to have the next chapter up soon!