Chapter Five: Seeing You It Kills Me Now

Disclaimer: I own my Muse, my imagination, my dreams, the fangirl in me and not a whole lot else. To the show's writers - I worship the ground you metaphorically walk on.

A/N:- Sorry about the delay. I had lots of work and exams to do and then I got distracted by other fics and then I was away on holiday ….. . I'm going away again, this time to America so I'm not going to be able to write or update again until I'm back so here's a pretty long chapter for you to keep you going. Thanks for all your support and comments so far! It's a real joy reading them all.

'Detective David Reynolds, ex-Army, worked for NYPD for twelve years having transferred over from LAPD.'

"Mac, this means that this wasn't a random attack." Stella said worriedly.

Mac shook his head. "He works nightshift, if he did attack Lindsay then it could be a random attack as he hasn't necessary seen her around here."

"I don't know … we're nearly always pulling double shifts and a guy with his background, I don't think he would pull just any girl off the streets."

Suddenly Danny stamped his foot down in realisation. "The 'Blue Lights' bar where I met Lindsay last night. He could have seen her and singled her out from there."

"I better get Flack on the case." Mac said, frowning at the other two.

"Danny I want you and Hawkes to pull out the files of unsolved rape cases from the past few months just in case. Stella, you and I are going with Flack to find this guy." He paused. "Maybe you would like to change first?" he suggested looking at her still wearing her now rather rumpled black dress.

"Yeah." Stella said, looking down at herself. "I think I've got a change of clothes in my locker." She walked into the locker room and wasn't surprised to see Lindsay sitting in there, seated on the bench, staring down at her hands. Stella sat down next to her quietly.

"You still can't tell me who it is can you?" Lindsay asked although she already knew what the answer would be.

"No but Flack should be chasing the lead down now." Stella answered her gently. "It'll all be over soon."

"And then I guess I can just get on with my life just as if nothing had happened." Lindsay said bitterly.

Stella looked at her sadly. The shock and fear was starting to be replaced with anger and resentment and knowing Lindsay, very soon that would be replaced with fierce determination not to let it affect her work.

"I'm going out to get some air." Lindsay sighed, standing up.

"Do you want some company?" Stella asked.

"No, I think I'd like some time alone if that's okay." Lindsay said before heading out.

As she walked down the corridor she could see the lab techs and other detectives shooting her sympathetic looks which she tried to ignore and carry on walking with her head held up high but it was hard. Back in Montana she would have known everyone in the building and they would have all approached her with hugs uttering angry threats at the person who did this to her …………… mind you back in Montana she probably would never have been attacked anyway.

She pushed open the glass doors that led onto the deserted balcony. It was a cold day and it was blowing a gale way up on the 42nd floor but she ignored it and walked over to the edge and resting her hands on the railing she looked down at the street below. Office workers, tourists and street merchants were busy going about their business like ants down below. She used to be one of them, care free, innocently taking in everything New York had to offer but things had changed now. She could feel herself start to lose it and begin to cry again. She hated feeling so weak and pathetic but she couldn't help it. It was like she had a TV screen in her head that just kept playing her attack over and over again and occasionally she would tune in and it would shatter her self confidence.

Danny had wanted to go with Flack to pick up Reynolds but it was probably best that Mac and Stella went since he was feeling especially volatile and likely to explode at the moment. If any one of them had been attacked it would feel like he was attacking them all but it hurt especially because it had been Lindsay who had had to suffer. The guilt that had been starting to pile up was threatening to overflow. He had looked at it as his responsibility to look after the new girl and integrate her into the team and ever since his feelings for her had started to develop you would have thought that he would have looked out for her doubly hard. He knew it wasn't actually his fault and that Hawkes, Stella, Flack and Mac felt the same but he couldn't stop blaming himself. He was growing increasingly restless and could hardly keep his eyes on the computer screen.

"Look, why don't you go grab us some coffee whilst I finish running through these cases." Sheldon said looking at him over his computer at him.

Danny sighed. "Sorry, I just-"

"I know. Go bring me some caffeine." Hawkes said waving him away.

Danny headed out the lab and was halfway to the break room when he passed by the balcony and saw Lindsay standing there alone.

"Hey Montana!" he called, opening the door. She didn't turn and Danny guessed that she hadn't heard since he could hardly hear himself over the wind. Bracing himself against the wind, he walked towards her and stood next to her a little way away so as not to startle her. She shifted a bit indicating to him that she had seen him and he looked across at her, about to suggest they went inside when he noticed, with a pang in his heart, the tears streaming down her face and the fact she was shivering from the cold. He pulled off his jacket and draped it over her shoulders.

"It's going to be alright Lindsay." He said into her ear, gently drawing her into his arms. She tensed involuntarily before relaxing and burying her face in his shirt. Danny held her tightly and stroked her back lightly, trying to ease her internal pain.

Lindsay didn't know why but having Danny there just made her cry more when usually she would have been overcome with embarrassment and pulled away and insist that she was alright. Now she just wanted to stay out here with him where it was safe. She curled her arms around his neck and clung to him. "I can't do this Danny. I can't do this."

"Yes you can. You're not going to let him get to you. You're going to put him away for a long long time and then prove to him that he hasn't ruined your life like he wanted." He said firmly, resting his head lightly on hers. The wind was causing her hair to blow up and hit against his face but he didn't care, he just wished he could offer her some sort of comfort.

"Hey, you guys get him?" Hawkes asked coming out of the lab as Mac and Stella passed.

"Yes, he's waiting in the interview room denying everything of course." Mac answered with a sigh. Then he frowned. "Where's Danny? Isn't he meant to be looking at past cases with you?"

"Yeah, I just came out to look for him. He said he was going to go get coffee for me half an hour ago." Hawkes explained.

Stella wandered a little way down the corridor and stopped at the large window which looked out onto the balcony and motioned the guys over.

"I think the fact that she repressed everything for almost a week before telling someone is really starting to affect her." Stella said quietly.

"And I think Danny's taking it badly, blames himself for some reason." Sheldon added.

"I hate to have to do this but we have a suspect to interview." Mac sighed before opening the door and shouting at Danny and Lindsay. As they made their way in Mac turned to Stella. "I'm going to let Danny take this with Flack and I. Maybe his temper will scare Reynolds into confessing. You okay with staying with Lindsay?" Mac knew how much this case was upsetting Stella and he didn't want to make her more upset with having to face the suspect.

Stella nodded. "Of course."

Danny heard Mac calling and Lindsay evidently had as well as she moved away from him quickly and wiped her eyes with the back of her hands before handing him his jacket back. "I'm sorry for crying all over you." She apologised, giving him a weak smile.

"You've got nothing to apologise for Montana." He said, motioning her towards the door.

As she saw the other three standing there, her embarrassment grew and she wished her eyes weren't all red from crying. Stella gave her a small smile and motioned her towards the break room.

"What's up?" Danny asked his boss, stuffing his hands into his pockets and watching as Lindsay walked down the corridor, Stella's arm around her comfortingly.

"We've got Reynolds in custody and I want you to go in there with Flack and I." Mac told him.

"Good, let's nail this son of a bitch." Danny said vehemently, smacking his fist into the palm of his other hand.

"Danny, I want you to take it easy … can I trust you not to lose it in there?"

Danny relaxed his fist and dropped his gaze to the floor before looking back up to meet his boss' gaze determinedly. "I promise he'll still be able to walk after I'm done." He said before stalking down the corridor to the interview room.

Danny wasn't exactly sure what he expected to see when he walked into the interview room but David Reynolds pretty much fit the description. Tall, strong and denying his involvement loud and clear.

"This is outrageous. I'm NYPD and I'm telling you I had nothing to do with this." He shouted as Mac and Danny took their seats.

"Detective Reynolds. You know the drill. We will be recording the whole interview and for your own benefit I would start telling the truth right from the beginning." Mac told him.

"I am telling the truth. I wouldn't attack anyone."

"That's not what your record says." Mac said, looking through a folder.

"Just because I had one bust up when I was in the Army does NOT mean I raped a CSI." David spat.

"Where were you last Tuesday?" Mac questioned.

"I went straight home after a double shift and stayed there the whole night."

"Can anyone confirm this?"

David's jaw jutted out. "No. I didn't talk to anyone all night."

"So for all we know, you could have been in the alley round the back of Morrisons?" Danny shot, walking up and down the room behind their suspect.

"I tell you I've never raped anyone."

"Then how come your DNA is all over Lindsay Monroe's clothing?" Mac said, shoving the evidence across the table.

Shock registered on Reynolds face. "I have no idea but I swear I've never touched her in my life. I don't even know who the hell she is."

"That's not what the evidence is saying and you don't need me to tell you that evidence speaks louder than words." Mac said.

"For the last time I DIDN'T RAPE HER." Reynolds shouted, standing up in an attempt to leave.

Danny stopped him and shoved him against the wall, his temper getting the better of him. "Why don't you quit lying and just admit what you've done you lying bit of scum. You attacked and brutally raped a friend of mine and by God I'm going to make you pay." Danny seethed.

"Danny." Mac said shortly, standing up. "Let him go."

Danny glared at Reynolds for a couple of seconds longer before letting go of his shirt.

"You wait here and I'll give you a second chance to call a lawyer before we lock you up." Mac said gruffly to Reynolds before leading Danny out of the room.

………..

Lindsay paced up and down the break room, unable to keep still. All she could think about was the fact that the son of a bitch who ruined her life was sitting in a room just a few meters down the corridor and she wasn't allowed to see the bastard.

"Why don't you sit down and have a cookie?" Stella said gently, holding out the bag.

Lindsay shook her head and continued her agitated pacing.

"Lindsay, I know it's hard but Mac and Danny are doing their job. They're going to nail him and then you can start to work at putting this whole thing behind you."

"I need to see him. I need to look him in the eye and make him realise what he did." Lindsay said angrily.

"You'll need to point him out during a line-up so you know we can't let you see him beforehand-" But before Stella could finish, Lindsay was out of the door, running down the corridor to the interview room. "LINDSAY!" Stella shouted, running after her.

Lindsay knew she was compromising the investigation but she couldn't help herself. Just in this minute, she wasn't CSI Monroe, she was just a young lady overcome with the need for revenge.

She stopped short in front of the one-way window and looked in just as Danny and Mac came out.

"Lindsay what are you doing here? You know you can't see him before the line-up." Mac hissed.

Stella caught up with them. "I couldn't stop her, she just ran." She said breathlessly in answer to Mac's annoyed look.

Danny walked to Lindsay's side and touched her arm gently. "Are you okay?"

Lindsay shook her head slightly before spinning round to face the others. "Is that the suspect in my case?"

"Yes, he came up as a match to the DNA we ran through the database." Mac answered with a frown.

A look of confusion came across Lindsay's face as she shook her head. "He's not the guy who raped me."