Okay first off I would like to thank XxMade In HeavenxX and one of my best friends ,laughing-maniac-of-fire, for reviewing. Yea the first chapter I'm thinking about redoing or deleting or something. Now a disclaimer. I don't own Resident Evil, Jerry Springer, weapons, or anything else. And italicized words mean the characters are thinking to themselves.
Fiona: Wait did you just say Jerry Springer?
Author: Yes, Yes I did.
Fiona: Do I even want to know what you're planning?
Author: No probably not but don't worry it's your brother that has to deal with it.
Fiona: Oh okay I'm fine with that.
Robby: Hey! First bricks and now this!
Author: You'll get over it. Anyways on to the story!
Chapter 3: A Gift for My Valentine(Seriously this is starting to sound lame)
Fiona and Robby were too busy sorting through the weapons and ammo that they didn't hear the creaking of the apartment door as it was being opened. Whatever had opened the door slowly made it's way to the room where Fiona and Robby were. As the doorknob began to turn, Fiona was the first to take notice. She readied her weapon preparing to fire as soon as the door opened.
Fiona: This isn't right. Zombies aren't able to open doors.
The door swung open and Fiona was just about to shoot when Seth appeared in the door way.
Seth: Hey guys how's it going? Fiona why are you pointing a gun at me?
Robby: It's a monster! Shoot him! Shoot him!
Fiona: Calm down! It's not a monster, it's Seth!
Robby: So? You can still shoot him!
Fiona: (glares evilly at Robby for several seconds until turning her attention back to Seth) I can't believe you're alive! I'm so happy to see you (Fiona hugs Seth)!Seth where did you go? How did you survive?
Seth: Well after stopping to comb my hair and looking at myself in that window, I noticed you two were gone. Then those zombies were right on me. I was sure I was a goner but they walked right past me.
Fiona: I can't believe that! Well at least you're safe.
Robby: Oh joyous he made it (sarcastically)! So you're telling me you're soooo dumb that the zombies thought you were one of them and left you alone? You've got to be kidding me!
Fiona: (Smack) You moron! That's just mean!
Robby: Ouch! Don't you think you've hurt me enough today?
Fiona: If you keep saying things like that then I'll have to hurt you more, Mr. Negative.
Robby: Bite me!
Fiona: You know, that's not a wise thing to say cosidering that there are flesh-eating monsters out therethat might take you up on that offer. Well back to the matter at hand. We need to take all the ammo and weapons we can.
Fiona, Robby, and Seth take as much as they can carry. Fiona took an assault rifle, a shotgun, a magnum, and the handgun she got off the dead police officer, along with some magazines for the guns. Fiona wouldn't let Robby have anything but a beretta, a combat knife, and a semi-auto pistol. He too took a few clips for the guns. Both Fiona and Robby were too afraid to give Seth any weapons. Fiona feared he might hurt himself while Robby thought it was more likely that Seth would hurt him. They insisted on him carrying as much ammo as he could for them instead of packing any weapons.
Robby: (Points at road on map) Okay so I've been looking at the map and I think we should take this road and then turn here and that'll give us a straight stretch out of here.
Seth: That's surprising. Everytime we go on vacation you end up getting lost at least twice.
Robby: Who asked you pretty boy!
Fiona: Enough! And besides I think that's a bad idea. Most of the city has probably been infected by now. We'd never get through the streets. I say we try to find survivors and see if anyone can help us. We should probably go to the hospital. There is a chance someone could be alive there and we could always use the medical equipment.
Robby: You're right but the RPD building is on the way to the hospital. There could be survivors there. We should stop there and see if anyone needs help.
Fiona: Right. We should go.
The three leave the apartment and head down the stairs to Fiona's car. The car was trashed and the undead were closing in on them. Fiona pointed to an alleyway and darted into it, Robby and Seth following. Fiona shot three zombies that were blocking her path through the alleyway with her handgun.
Fiona: (stopping and holding out her hand gesturing for them to stop) I hear something up ahead. (She gestured to hide behind some garbage)
The three lifted their heads up above the garbage they were hiding behind to see a woman in a corner against a wall and the monster that had ripped Jason to pieces standing in front of her.
Robby: We have to help her!
Fiona: No! Now's not the time to grow a conscience. We need to leave now!
Robby, ignoring his sister's order, leaps out from behind their hiding spot and shoots a round at the monster.
Woman: You retarded moron! You shot me in the leg!
Fiona: See? This is why I didn't let you have anything but a beretta and a combat knife (But Robby was too stunned and didn't hear her).
Robby: Did I just shoot someone? (The incident causes Robby to zone out)
Jerry Springer: Welcome everyone. Today's show is about a lovely young woman who was shot in the leg by a moron while she was trying to escape a monster. Let's hear her story.
Woman: Well I was against a beeping wall fighting for my beeping life when this beeping beep shot me in the beeping leg!
Jerry: What happened after he shot you in the leg?
Woman: Well the beeping monster tried to beeping kill me and I couldn't do beeping anything but beeping duck and dodge.
Jerry: Well we have two special guests. Everyone welcome the monster and the idiot that shot this woman in the leg. (The audience applaudes for the monster but boo's Robby)
Monster: S.T.A.R.S.!
Woman: You beeping beephole. I should beeping kill you!
Robby: I'm sorry! I was just trying to help! I didn't mean to shoot you in the leg!
Woman: Well you beeping did and you didn't beeping help me one bit!
The woman, audience, and the monster jump on Robby trying to kill him
Fiona smacks Robby knocking him out of his nightmare.
Fiona: You moron! You shot her in the leg! Now we have to help her! (Fiona does a jump/roll and shoots five rounds from her handgun into it's back.) I think I just ticked it off! Run now!
The three start running from the monster that is now chasing them. As they get further away they here the screaming of an angry woman. "If I ever see you again I'm going to break every bone in your body, then wait 'til they heal and break them again!"
Robby (still running): Why didn't you want to help her Fiona? She was in trouble!
Fiona: Apparently you've had a change in heart. I thought you liked seeing people torn to shreds?
Robby: That was because it was Jason. I told you I didn't like himandbesidesIthink he's this evildemon from theunderworldand don't change the subject? And why does she look so familiar?
Fiona: That's probably because she's been in the paper for a long time.
Robby: Who is she Fiona?
Fiona: Fine I'll tell you. I think it's safe to rest here for now. (sits down)The reason I didn't want to help her is because she is plenty capable of doing it herself. Her name is Jill Valentine and she was a member of the S.T.A.R.S. Alpha Team until they were all discharged for the lies they spread after coming back from their recent mission.
Robby: What lies?
Fiona: They claimed that there were flesh-eating monsters created by Umbrella in a mansion that they were sent to investigate. Of course nobody believed them and they were quickly dismissed.
Robby: I remember reading about that. I thought they were crazy but they were right weren't they?
Fiona: Yes (hanging head down in disappointment and sadness).
Robby: Fiona, how do you know all this? Who do you really work for?
Fiona: (tears swelling up in her eyes) I'm sorry Robby but I can't tell you right now. It's for your own good.
Robby: Bu-
Seth: (cutting off Robby) Leave her alone. She'll tell us when she's ready. We need to make our way to the RPD as soon as possible.
Robby: For the first time in my life, I agree with you.
Fiona: Robby, no offense but I'm going to have to ask for the semi-automatic pistol. I don't want another accident like that to happen again. You're lucky I'm letting you keep the beretta and knife.
Robby hands Fiona the gun, hangs his head, and apologizes. They begin making their way to the RPD, avoiding or killing the zombies in their way, well Fiona is anyway.
End Chapter 3
I dunno this chapter was kinda short. I had a few ideas that I knew I would forget if I didn't write them down...then I hit a brick wall. Do you know how your brain looks likeon a brick wall when it's over 100 degrees outside...it's not pretty. Oh and I hope that having that Jerry Springer moment doesn't discourage people from reading this...I'm sure chapter 1 can do that all on it's own lol. Anyways a word from the characters!
Author: So how did you like the Jerry Springer Show Robby?
Robby (with wounds to the head and bleeding all over): Oh fine. This crazy woman was cursing me out every other word, even though I was trying to help her, and then the whole audience attacks me. And do you know how it feels to have a few ton monster standing on your crotch? I don't think I'll ever be able to have children!
Fiona: It's not like you do it all the time anyway. Actually, have you ever done it?
Robby (blushing): Ye Yes I have! I mean of course I have!
Fiona: I think you're lying.
Robby: I'm not going to have this conversation with my own sister let alone all the people who might read this!
Fiona: The chances of that are slim but if they do that means I can laugh at your expense.
Robby: Author, please an anvil falling on her head would be niceright about now.
Author waves hand and anvil falls on Robby.
Author: Oh sorry I guess I was a little off in my aiming.
Fiona: Please read and review so I can laugh at my brother some more! Please!