Chapter 12:
Susan saw Doug walk past her as she looked down at her feet. "Doug wait." she said but he walked past her. then she looked to Carter, she hoped he would do something. it would be bad if they left it like this.
Carter had watched Doug, he had hurt him. He ran after Doug. "Ah so first step your in denial, right now you have a problem, but you don't want to admit, I'm not going to make you run out of your life, but your hurting others the way your acting, including me. For the longest time I haven't had a male friend around, and now I do. but this male friend is to full of himself. He was angry and hurt. "go ahead and punch me, I won't care, it prove you have a problem," Carter said to Doug
Doug pulled out of Carter's touch. "What's wrong with you? You really want to start a fight with me?" Doug looked around. he saw all of the people standing there watching the two of them. "Look, thanks for trying to help, but I don't know what to do." Doug had meant to say that just to get Carter to drop it but then he realized it was the truth, he really didn't know where to go from here. as that thought came through his mind he almost broke down. "God John! why does everything always have to be this bad! I-Bu-" He couldn't find the right words to say. Finally after a few moments he found the right question to ask. "Where do I go from here?" he said as he looked at his friend, hoping for an answer.
Carter was glad Doug was finally excepting he needed help. "Where you go from here is to talk to someone, and what's going on in your mind, at first I never liked the sound of it either Doug, but you need to go and get help," He said to him. "If you like I can set you up with someone I still once and while see as my therapist, He's pretty good," He said to him. "Also you need time, before you go back to Carol and the girls," He said to him
Doug stood for a second, taking in what Carter had just told him. "I'll do it if you do me a favor." Doug stopped, he had to choose his words carefully and he knew it. "will you keep this between just you me? I can handle people thinking a have a bad temper but I don't want anyone to know if I'm going to therapy...not even Carol." thinking back on the past 36 hours he almost laughed, "oh hell Carter, I don't even have a place to stay. I know Carol doesn't want to see me but she has the only set of keys to our house..." he put a hand on his face and let out a deep sigh " there is nothing I can do to fix what I've done with Carol is there?" Doug couldn't go back to work, and he couldn't go home. what he needed now was a good friend.
Carter smiled at Doug. "Its not a problem Doug, this can be between you and Me," He said to him. "I set you up for your appointment, and since you said Carol doesn't want to see you right now, you can stay with me at the mansion, there's tons of room," He said. (that's where he lives when he's not with Abby at times)
Doug grinned. he was really happy he had someone to share this with. he was glad Carter didn't give up on him like everyone else. he didn't know what to say to Carter so he just walked up and pulled him into a hug. when he pulled back he gave him a look that said, 'thanks a lot.' but didn't say a word. after pacing back and forth awhile he looked up "oh hell, I'm ruined your day with Abby didn't I? sorry john. should we go back to work?"
Carter looked at him. "No you haven't, I'll call her again in a little bit," He said to him... He hugged him back with a big hug. "Yes we should get back into work, and I call my therapist for you," He told him.
Doug walked back into the hospital with Carter. he saw that Susan had come in. he walked from Carter over to her and sat down. as she sat down with him Doug put his arm around her and kissed the side of her head. "I'm so sorry Susan. I have been having a rough time lately. I would never hurt you, I love you very much."
Susan hugged Doug back. "I love you too. don't worry about it." she said as she smiled at him. "I'm not that easy to get rid of. I'm glad you ok now though." as she stood up to go back to work she looked back at him. "you should tell that to Carol, maybe not today, but you need to talk to her soon." Susan walked away and hoped he would. as she walked down the hall she saw Carter. "hey Carter thanks so much for talking with Doug. he looks so much better now."
Carter looked at Susan. "Your welcome," He told her, "Its not a problem, what are friends for," He said to Susan, wishing he could get a hold of Abby
As Doug sat in the chairs he realized he wasn't on today. not quite knowing what to do he thought he should go get some of his things at the house before Carol got home. he didn't know where she was or what he would ever say to her but he knew one day he had to try. he passed by his house twice. he didn't want to go in but he had to get his stuff. "Ahh damn" he thought "if I had only listened to her in the first place." his head was pounding since it had been almost 12 hours since he had used anything. he couldn't even think about using because he knew if he did it would be back to step one. after spending an hour in the grocery store and coming back to the house he thought, "its now or never" he quietly walked into the living room nervously looking around. not seeing anyone he went into the bedroom and grabbed up some clothes and his toothbrush. still not seeing Carol he thought she might be on a walk. he took out if his pocket what he had bought at the grocery store. as he left he set the box of animal crackers on the counter without a note. he knew Carol would know it was from him. he pulled out of the driveway and went back to the hospital.
Carol had taken the girls on a walk a few hours ago. She walked into the house and saw a card and animal crackers; She didn't know what to do with them it was to hard to even pick up.
Doug reached the hospital again. he walked in and semi searched for Carter. not seeing him and not really caring he walked into the lounge and sat down. he felt like he was interrupting a conversation between weaver and a short red haired surgeon that he knew he had seen before but couldn't quite place with a name. their shouting match continued as he sat down. once they both looked up at him they went to leave. "Kerry" Doug said in a soft tone, "once you have a second id like to speak with you." she nodded and left. Doug sat thinking on what to do next, thinking of all the new people here, and mostly what to say to Carol. "oh that was Dr. Romano." he thought "no wonder I blocked him out... ok now I'm stalling. maybe I should leave a message on her cell phone. but what if she picks up?" he debated over this for a long period of time. finally he picked up the phone and dialed her cell number.
Carter walked into the lounge and saw Doug. He still hadn't found Abby anywhere that day. "Hey Doug, how's it going?" He asked him
Doug closed the cell phone. "Fine. I'm just a little bored. I went to my house to get some clothes and stuff. so when are you off?"
"Ah its one of those days," He said to him. "Well I'm off in a bout three minutes, so we could go to my place afterwards. Even though I wished I could find Abby," He said to him
"Yeah I wish I could find Carol. HA! at least we have one thing in common." Doug sat down. his head was pounding and his hands were shaking, but he was trying hard not to let Carter notice. "yeah so whenever your off and ready to go let me know...and thanks again"
Carter noticed the hand shake. "Doug are you ok?" He asked him. "And I'm off now," He said to him as he looked at his watch
Doug looked up at Carter. "I'm..." at first he was going to deny it, but he knew it wouldn't do any good."I feel sick. I probably look like crap too. I'm sad to say Carter, that you kind of met me at a bad place in my life. but let's just leave it at that." he said standing up and getting his jacket. "I just need to get out of here."
Carter was shocked to hear this from Doug. "Doug um ok," He said to him not really knowing what to do
looking at carter's reaction Doug tried to say something. "can we just go? I've never seen your house anyway. you hungry?"
"All right lets go, Just warn its bigger then you think Doug, its not really what you call a house. And yea I'm hungry," he said to him. They left the lounge. "Did you Drive here or take the El?" he asked him.
Doug laughed, "How big could your house be?" once he walked outside he looked for his car. "yeah I drove here but I'm not sure I should be driving. m head is killing me. do you want to stop and get something to eat or do you have food at your house?" after pausing for a second Doug pulled out his wallet "hey, do you want me to pay help pay rent or something since I'm staying with you for a few days?"
Carter laughed. "Doug put away your money; I 'm just being a friend."I'm not living in an apartment or a house" he said. "I'll drive, "He told him. We have plenty of food, where were going'' he told him
Doug looked surprised. "ok, I just don't want to be taking over your house." he said with a laugh. following Carter to his car he got in. "so Carter... you know, I really do owe you. I mean I just came back into Chicago a few days ago after not seeing you for five years and here you are helping me out. that means a lot..." trying now to change the subject he started again. "hey! I thought Susan had told me that you and her were going out a few years ago! whatever happened with that?"
Carter looked at him as he drove to the mansion, He would be staying there since his gamma had passed away, it still felt home. Carter turned as Doug mentioned Susan, ''Oh We thought it could work, but then we realized we didn't have chemistry, but I'm really in love with Abby, but Susan and I are still friends," She said to her
Doug shook his head. "Man I still remember Mark and Susan. she was almost the only woman I didn't see at county because I knew Mark was stuck on her. ever since then we have been friends." Doug could see a huge mansion in the distance. "Look at that" he said. "I don't know how people can live in places like that! when I was young I lived in a three room house in Kentucky and I thought I was lucky!"
Susan finished up her shift at county. after realizing that Carter and Doug had left she went out looking for someone to eat dinner with. she hated being alone, especially after they day she had today. after getting her things out of her locker she scrolled down the list in her cell phone. as she came across carol's she hit enter without a second thought. maybe Carol would like some company tonight too. as it rang she waited for Carol to pick up.
Carter pulled into the mansion. "Its easy" He told Doug. "I grew up with a rich family, and to tell you the truth I hated it mostly" he told him. He parked the car, and got out. "Welcome to the Carter Mansion" he told him. As he stopped the engine and waited for Doug to get out
Carol was doing some shopping while the girls were with her mama, she was still mad at Doug, she didn't know at the moment if she could forgive him. As she was looking at her list she heard her cell go off. "Hello?" She said into the phone
"Oh, it's your house? damn I'm sorry for joking about it." Doug said as he stepped out of the car. both men walked into the house and Doug was floored. "wow Carter this is great. so what now?"
"Hey Carol, it's Susan. I just wanted to see how you were doing."
Carter looked at Doug at first it didn't seem like he was joking. "Well you can pick any rooms out of all these hundred rooms" he said to her
"Hey Susan what's up, I'm just grocery shopping," She said to her
"Ha-Ha hell man, just set me up where ever. hey you even got a basketball court! I remember the last time we played, you were all mad cause I slept with... well old times. "he cleared his throat."you have some aspirin I could have?" Doug said uncomfortably. it had been a strange day and he was just starting to feel the full effect of it.
"oh I need to do that too." she stopped, she wondered if Carol didn't just want to be left alone. "well if you want to go out later I'll get you a drink on me. maybe even Abby will come."
Carter remember that. "Hey that was strange, there's a room over here, or there, But I suggest you take this one its nice and warm."Well the truth Harper and I didn't really go out that long" He said to him
Carol looked at her watch. "Yea I would love to hang out."Um I thought Carter and her were going to have a date," She said to her
"Sure, I got this one." Doug said as he set his stuff inside. "are you on tomorrow? I need to go and talk to weaver about a long time position." as they started walking back down Doug felt he needed to be honest. "hey Carter thanks for setting me up, but if it's ok I'm going to take a walk or something. are you staying here tonight?"
"Oh well" Susan didn't know if she should say who Carter was actually with, "I think he just went home. but call me back if you want to get a drink. otherwise ill see you tomorrow."
Carter looked at Doug worriedly. "I don't work tomorrow, I work the next day" he said to him. "I'm going to stay here, and see if I can get contact with Abby at all
"Wait Susan, I go with you tonight, I need to be out of the house," She said to her
"ok, well have fun with Abby. I wont be gone too long, I-I just need to take a walk. don't wait up." he said as he grabbed his coat and walked outside.
"ok, you want to meet at Hennessey's? its just off Michigan blvd. I need to go out too. when is good for you?"
Carter nodded at Doug. "Don't worry, I won't wait up for you" he said to Doug. He went down the hall and started to call Abby's number again
"Sounds good to me, I meet you there as soon as I'm done," She said to Susan
Doug nodded and walked outside. he didn't know the neighborhood but he was sure there weren't many muggers around. he walked up and down the street many times not quite knowing what to do. he stuck his hand in his jacket to find his cell phone, when he felt a bottle case instead. he pulled it out and looked at the label. it was his prescription from when he hurt his knee. he had been refilling it for almost a year and a half. he took one look at them and threw the bottle down the street. "that is what had done all this" he told himself, but he knew it wasn't true, he had done it. he wanted to call Carol but he knew he couldn't. instead he walked back to the mansion. he didn't go in the front though; instead he walked to the back where the basketball court was. he looked around and found a ball. even though it was a little deflated it would work. he stood back and shot. the sound of it going in made a nice swish. the next five short went in. however, playing quickly moved into frustration and he threw the ball at the backboard. it smacked loud as it hit. as he saw the ball roll past him he picked it up and threw it again. "Ahh!" he yelled as he threw it a third time.
"alright, just give me a call when your ready." Susan said as she hung up the phone.
Carter had heard the noise in the back. He still hadn't gotten a hold of Abby. He walked out to the court. "I'll play you one on one" he said trying to cheer up Doug as well. He hadn't played out here for awhile.
"All right, I give you a call when I'm ready," She said to her
Doug looked around as he saw Carter. "Sorry for making noise. I thought you were going out with Abby." he said as he gave Carter the ball.
"Its not a problem Doug, so did I. I haven't heard from her all day" he told Doug
"Yeah, I think my shot is off, I just missed and hit the backboard." Doug said, trying to make something up to explain the noise. "It's getting late; I don't want to keep you up. I just know I wont be able to sleep, you know?"
Anna stood in the ambulance bay at County. It had been so long since she had last stood here. Chicago had called her back once again. There was something about the windy city. She could leave but not stay gone for long. When she got the call that County had accepted her resume she was excited yet scared. She wasn't sure what to expect and she didn't know if she would be welcomed back with open arms.
Kerry Looked up at the board. Chen had called in sick, Luka was missing in action. She was down two attending now and being over run by obnoxious little med students. She picked up the phone and dialed Carter's number. He was the chief resident he was going to get his hinny in here and supervise them. Kerry was administration now and as much as she loved patient care she was buried in meetings and didn't have time to baby-sit.
Carter looked at Doug. "Its not a problem" Carter said as he shot the hoop into the basket. Just as he did. He heard he was getting Page. "Dang it Weaver's already paging me to work, when I Just got off. Carter went and Dialed the ER, on his cell phone.
Kerry didn't want for John to answer when she heard the phone being picked up. "Carter, get back in here. I'm down attending and your residents need supervising."
"Yeah weavers like that" Doug said as he watched Carter dial his phone. "you have to go in?"
"Fine Kerry, even though I just got off, I'll be there" He said annoyed. He just wanted to go to bed and sleep. He hung up. "Yea I got to go in" he told Doug. "See you later, and don't worry about asking the maids for anything, they will help you" he told him
Kerry did feel a slight twinge of guilt for calling him back in, but it slowly faded when she looked around at all the young inexperienced faces that were in her ER. With all that Carter had put into this hospital it wasn't surprising to her that his name was at the top of her list for an attending spot at the end of his residency. She sighed as she left a message with Jerry for Carter to come up and meet with her when he got a chance. He'd make a great asset to the hospital even with everything he had been through. Carter definitely was a dedicated doctor whom she had no qualms with. She wasn't worried about any flack of Robert about this either. He'd just have to come to terms with Carter being an attending.