Eh no, I'm not dead. I am fairly busy right now, though, so only drabbles have been written. Feedback is love!
Meltdown
By: Nekare
Remus tries saying I love you, low and throaty and raw, and only a choked whisper comes out of his lips, words freezing at the below zero temperature in the room, heart pumping too much blood that his brain can handle.
Sirius' eyes narrow in confusion, trying to make out the muttered words that just won't reach his ears, the quiet sentence that Remus both wants to rip out of his insides and scream it at rooftops with doves and the world below as witness. Remus trembles, a little, and kisses him to make him forget. The bed is almost warm, and Sirius presses his foot against Remus' calves, the hole in the sock making the large toe tickle his skin (tickle and stir his damned emotions, heat coiled on his guts).
The treacherous words are still caught on the back of his throat, though, and a spring later (an eternity later), they slip from his mouth without any kind of warning, and when he finally realizes it he's still wearing the drowsy smile that carries even more weight that the golden laced letters bouncing on air itself, hiding with the green background of the lonely park at five in the morning, echoing in the silence.
Remus wants to be afraid, wants to be concerned, but Sirius has a lock of his brown hair between too red lips, hands twined on the grass (and petals on their faces, the blooming flowers shedding colors like rain); and he can't seem to get his brain to understand the situation.
So he stares at the sky, and Sirius laughs with dew on his voice and life in his eyes. "Took you long enough," he says, and when Remus repeats the words they feel like home on his tongue.