Chapter 41

Midori lay in bed that night, tossing and turning, unable to sleep. She closed her eyes for the fourth time, willing sleep to come, but it never did. "Why, in the name of Ganiel, can't I sleep?"

"Why don't you read a book or something?" Nicola mumbled, turning over to her back in cat-shape and covering her ears with the pillow.

"I've tried that." Midori replied dryly, turning over and resting her cheek against her hand and propping her elbow on the bed. "I've tried staring out the window, counting the stars, tried reading a book or a poem, heck, I've tried writing one."

"Is that so bad?" Nicola grumbled, rolling her eyes.

"It is when the candles keep burning out on me!" "Stupid candles can't keep themselves lit."

"Don't bring your wrath on the objects of the room, Midori." Nicola then burst out laughing; rolling around and finally wiped her teary eyes with one paw. She sighed deeply, "I needed a laugh. That is the silliest thing I've ever heard!"

The squire rolled her eyes and turned away from the cat, pulling up the warm quilt around her shoulders. "Goodnight." She whispered.

She heard Nicola answer and closed her eyes and this time, the pull of sleep was stronger, but for some strange reason, she resisted. Kicking off the quilt, she nimbly stepped from the bed onto the chilly flagstone floor. She felt a shiver crawl up her spine and smoothed out the white nightgown, going to the privy and splashing water on her face.

Gazing in the water, she realized that her reflection had changed somewhat. Her nose had been broken almost twice, her lips had lost that delicate look, her skin had a more weather-beaten appearance to it and her eyes had lost that childhood spark. Was this what Kalen saw in her, and yet still loved? So he loved her, a woman beaten around by life, yet still strong enough to face her foe?

Midori turned from the water and walked to the door.

"Where are you going at this late hour?" asked a teasing voice.

"Out." Was all she said, before closing the door behind her.

What she had really meant was, she meant to visit Kalen and see if he was having the same problem and wanted to talk. She tentatively knocked on his door and waited for an answer, if none came, she would leave.

She waited for a while and finally he answered, dressed in a wrinkled shirt and breeches and looking tired, "Oh, Midori, it's you. Come in."

Midori walked in feeling rather awkward as the wind from the broken window chilled her. "It's cold in here." she whispered.

He nodded. "So...it's a nice night isn't it?"

Midori was surprised at how unsure they both sounded, perhaps it was the cold air or the way they both seemed to get closer together. "Yes, the stars and moon are nice tonight."

Kalen wrapped a quilt around himself, shivering as a strong gust of wind blew inside, ruffling Midori's hair and making her wrap her arms across her chest, shivering.

"Here." Kalen patted a spot on the bed where Midori gratefully sat as he put an arm around her shoulders, the quilt warming them both. Midori sighed deeply and leaned on his shoulder, "Do you think we'll ever"— she broke off, hesitant if to continue.

"We'll ever what?" Kalen asked, turning to her, the moonlight turning his deep brown eyes an alluring black. Midori imagined his eyes were the night sky, and the stars—the light of the moon—had come to dance. She was swept into the heat of the moment that she failed to notice anything as Kalen trailed kisses down her jawbone, and caressed her cheek with his hand, moving down to kiss her collarbone.

Midori turned away as he grasped her shoulders and smiled, "Did you mean: Do you ever think we'll ever make love, to give ourselves away?"

She sighed, "Yes."

"Do you wish to?"

Midori was surprised at how easily they spoke of this topic. "I-I don't know."

"Tell me what your heart tells you." He told her.

"My heart tells me this will be our last time. But my mind says that I should secure a home and a shield before all this."

"Then I trust you to make a decision that's what is best for you." Kalen finished.

Midori bit her lip in thought for a moment before spilling it out. "Could I sleep with you?"

Kalen looked baffled. "Pardon?"

"I didn't mean in that context! I meant just a heartbeat beside mine."

Kalen chuckled, "I was just testing." He lay down and shifted over for Midori, who lay facing him, a sparkle in her eyes. She pulled the quilt over herself and her lover and, soon wrapped in his warmth, she fell into a deep dreamless sleep.

Tomorrow she would head back to Corus with Owen and Kalen, to convince her other friends to take their shields earlier and also to persuade the king to let them…It wasn't going to be an easy task.