PART 6
NEVILLE'S POV:
I've spent enough time with myself to be forced into thinking about the reality that I'm living in.
The reality is that there is something wrong with me.
But I can't pinpoint what it is.
I mean I could lie and say that everything is fine and that everything has always been fine.
But it hasn't.
And I think everyone knows that but me.
I don't know why I think that. After all isn't it me that should know whether or not 'my' life is at all relatively OK.
Alas, I don't really think that's the issue.
I mean. There's something missing granted.
But everything that I have contributed to my own life has been nothing. Except a vast knowledge of things that have no need to be known.
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I know that some people think I'm sad.
But really my sorrows have done nothing for me.
I have had a roof over my head, a family, whose life was taken early, loves me.
My grandmother was stern but that didn't mean she didn't still love me. My great- aunt's and uncles are the same way. I've had family who will give up their life to save me such as my parents had done.
So really I have no sorrows.
Except eh mundane petty ones.
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In the end I knew it was all going to end up like this.
My parents being clinically insane. With no hopes of ever getting better no matter what Grandmother said.
My Grandmother and Uncle finally reaching that time where old age is the limit to all their strengths and ultimate good things…
I had noticed Grandmother being jittery and exhausted, the trembling of her hands and the darkness underneath her eyes and the yellowing of her old skin…
No, her time had come.
Though the blow is something I don't think I will ever recover from it.
But I won't tell people how I feel.
Because at this point in my life and forevermore,
My feelings are all that I have.
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End of Neville's POV:
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If there's something that should be said for the bright red headed boy that sits alone in an abandoned classroom is that he does try.
He does try not to feel a betrayal to the two people in the world he never thought would leave him behind and rotting in this castle while they go off and nearly kill themselves.
He does try to be supportive of his sister and the rest of his family in this time of desperate needs. There is something that makes him angry and despair at the same time.
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When he was eleven and had first met Neville he thought that he was a simple person. Simple and soft as baking powder…
Now that he's had the time to watch he realizes how truly wrong he was.
Neville is somewhat cold and hard.
But not in an obvious way.
No, he's cold in his heart but not in his emotions.
He's hard as stone on what he allows his thoughts to linger on…
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He feels like a voyageur when he watches Neville from the other side of the Greenhouse windows…
He feels creepy when he comes in from the rain and hears Seamus ask him why he's so wet…
He tries not to think of it.
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