Four Hours Later (about 4 in the morning)
Tommy stirred slowly as he flung his arm towards the emptiness that laid beside him. He quickly turned his body over to it and discovered vacancy next to him. He sat up as he looked around the room. He noticed the puddle of wax that was once the candles, and he realized as he saw the rain drops come down slower, that the storm was letting up. He swung his legs over the bed as he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He reached out to the bed side lamp to see if the power was back. He was rewarded with soft glow when he flicked the switch. He wondered why Jude left and where she went. Did she regret what happened? Did she think he took advantage of her? 'Oh God, I hope not.' He thought silently as he got up from the bed and searched for his shirt. When he couldn't find it, he shrugged and trudged out of the room in search of Jude.
Jude sat on the piano bench with a guitar in her hand. She had woken up an hour before and thought everything had been a dream until she saw Tommy soundlessly sleeping next to her, his arm carelessly around her. She stared at him as a million thoughts ran through her head. She couldn't help but feel uncertain about everything. Did he think she was terrible? Did she make a fool of herself? Did he regret it? Did he just do it to prove to himself that he still had a hold over her? She tried to quell those thoughts as she remembered what he said on the stairs. She'd be damned if he didn't feel the same way that she did. Yet she couldn't help but feel unsure and somewhat insecure. The one thing she knew was it would never be the same between her and Tommy after this. They crossed a line, and now they had to decide whether to stay there or move forward.
She had then suddenly felt inspired. She had crept out of bed as quietly as possible, itching for a guitar. She saw Tommy's shirt lying on the floor and tossed it on without a second thought. She tiptoed out of the room as she felt lyrics swim around in her head. She needed an outlet. She needed to get these words out, to set them to music. She had hoped that it would ease her mind, and help her put things in perspective.
'And it did somewhat', she realized as she began to toy with her guitar. She had already established a melody a couple of days ago that would fit her lyrics. She began to play it as she sang the first verse. "I can't be losing sleep over this, no I can't. And now I cannot stop pacing. Give me a few hours and I'll have this all sorted out, if my mind would just stop racing." She changed a few chords around as she started the next part. "I cannot stand still, I can't be this unsturdy, this can't be happening to me." She closed her eyes as she began what she would deem the chorus later on. "Cause this is over my head, but underneath my feet. Cause by tomorrow morning I'll have this thing beat, and everything will be back to the way that it was. I wish that it was just that easy. Cause I'm waiting for tonight, been waiting for tomorrow, and I'm somewhere in between," She tucked her bare legs under her as she smiled softly. "what is real and just a dream." She stroked the chords as she hummed. She listened to herself play without words, before she heard a noise from the doorway.
When Tommy walked down the stairs, he immediately heard Jude. He couldn't make it out word for word, but he liked what he heard. Intrigued he drew himself closer until he came to the door frame. He felt the air clog in his throat as he spotted Jude. Her hair was mused slightly, and she sat there on the bench with a guitar in his shirt. His shirt. He realized at that moment he could wake up to her like that every day and never grow tired of it. He exhaled loudly, causing her to look up from her guitar.
She quickly stopped playing as she nervously shifted her guitar to her side. "Tommy. I didn't hear you come in." She told him as she look down and picked at his shirt.
"I woke up and I didn't know where you went. So I came down here to look for you." He explained as he stared at her.
She didn't know why she felt touched by that, but she did. "Ah well, you know when the urge hits you." She laughed a little as she patted the guitar. She sobered up as she looked at him. "I just needed to...play." She replied honestly.
Tommy nodded his head in understanding. "Continue." He demanded quietly. "I really liked it."
She obeyed as she brought the guitar in front of her as she slowly began the bridge. She glanced up at Tommy who was listening intently. She strummed the guitar as she finished it up. She looked at Tommy expectantly. "Well, what do you think?"
Tommy shook his head as he walked towards her. "I like the lyrics, but there's something about the chords you're playing that doesn't sit right." He came towards the bench and sat directly behind her. He wrapped his arms around her tightly, bringing her back against his stomach. She sighed contentedly as she felt his bare chest on her neck. Heenveloped her right hand with his as he slwoly brought it over to the front of the guitar. He held the top of the instrument with his left to steady it. "Here, try this." He instructed as he made Jude pluck the guitar with him. It came out lighter and more melodious this time. She nodded her head approvingly as Tommy continued to guide her. She began the bridge again. "Would you catch me if I fall out of what I fell in, don't be surprised If I collapse down at your feet again." Tommy rested his chin on Jude's shoulder as he let her hand go. She knew what she was doing. "I don't want to run away from this, I know that I just don't need this." She crooned the last words out as she plucked the final chords. Tommy picked up his head as Jude turned into him and looked for a response.
"Perfect." He whispered into her ear. "Absolutely perfect." He snaked his left arm around the front of her body as he tilted her head towards his and captured her lips lightly. When they pulled apart, she leaned her forehead against his and smiled. Her doubts had been snuffed thoroughly the minute he put his arms around her. She knew what he felt now. But all of a sudden the nagging question that had always been on her mind, popped back on to the front burner unexpectedly. She had been able to ignore it for a while, but now it buzzed loudly in her ears. She didn't know if it was because something had happened between them or what. She was overwhelmed with the need to know why. It itched through her as she looked over her shoulder at Tommy who was leaning against her back. When he saw the question in her eyes, he slanted up a little, puzzled. "What?" He asked, curious to know what was going on in her mind.
She pulled away from him slightly as she looked him in the eye. She tilted her head away from him to get a better a view of his face. "Why did you leave all those months ago?" She blurted out softly, unable to contain herself any longer.
"What?" Tommy asked. He was caught off guard by the question as he quizzically met Jude's gaze.
"Why did you leave?" She repeated, putting it so simply that he had trouble answering it. He exhaled heavily as he disentangled himself from Jude. He walked over to the window, as he tucked his palm under his chin and crossed his other arm over his chest. He watched the last drops of rain fall to the ground.
She let him go as she watched him gravitate towards the half round, ceiling length window. She wrapped her arms around herself, waiting for him to speak. When he said nothing, she decided to continue. "I've let it go for awhile now, but I think it's time. I think I deserve the truth." She told him calmly as he continued to stare outside. Jude sighed before she went on. "I just need to know why. Why was it so easy to leave?" She asked candidly, her voice lacking any anger or hostility. She was past that, especially after tonight.
Tommy gave out a sour laugh. "Easy?" He stressed the word. "Easy? That was the hardest thing I've ever did."
Jude looked at him considerately. "Didn't seem too hard to me."
"Well, it was, Jude." He bit out harshly as he spun around to face her. "You think I left because it was what I wanted?"
"Yes." She easily breathed out.
Tommy shook his head furiously. "No, no I left because it was what you needed!" He exploded, watching Jude's face scrunch up in bewilderment.
"What I needed?" She murmured, dubious. "How can that be? You told me you wanted a break from me. That you were tired of it all, that it wasn't worth it. And I'm not exaggerating, that's word for word, Quincy. Trust me I'll never forget that night, ever." Jude caustically threw at him. "And what gave you the right to decide what I need and don't need? The last thing I wanted was to be deserted." She felt a sudden spark of anger in her. She had planned to address this in calm and rational matter; she wasn't looking for a fight. 'Obviously I've abandoned that idea.' Jude ruefully thought.
"No, you're wrong, Jude. You don't understand. I was right to leave." Tommy told her with conviction. "If I stayed any longer, I would have..." He stopped when he realized what he was about to say. He shut his eyes tightly and turned away from her as he combed his hair with his hand wearily.
"You would have what, Tommy?" She asked slowly as she took a step towards him, causing him to face her. She ran a hand up and down his bare chest.
Tommy lightly grabbed her wrist and pulled her towards him. "I would have taken you, and damned the consequences." He whispered roughly.
Jude slanted her head as she touched her hands to his hips. "Why didn't you?"
"Because," He began as he looped his hands around her waist. "It wouldn't have been right."
She huffed a little. "Yeah, it would have been, Tommy. It was what I wanted too. It always was."
Tommy sighed, frustrated, his hands never leaving her sides. "Damn it, Jude you were seventeen."
"And now I'm eighteen! What was the big difference? Why is it okay to be with me now, but not 9 months ago?" She questioned furiously.
"You know the difference, Jude."
"That's right. I wasn't legal. How could I forget?" She sarcastically said as she pulled out of his grasp. "It was just time, stupid pointless time. But it means so much to you! I haven't changed since I turned 18. I'm still the same, Tommy. You could have saved alotta heartache all around if you just stepped up and been a man and done the right thing and admit your feeling-"
"Are you serious?" He fired at her intensely, silencing her words. "I was doing the right thing! I was being a man by stepping back, by being selfless for once in my life, Jude. I was doing the last thing in the world that I wanted to do- leave you. I knew that even being away from you for 8 weeks would kill me, so imagine how 8 months felt. But, I did it anyway. I gave you up for the time being, cause you needed it. You were entitled to childhood, whatever innocence you had left before we started something, before we complicated things. I knew we were heading that way as we wrapped up your second album."
He started to pace a little as he recalled everything he felt before he left. "You were driving me crazy, and I knew you weren't even trying. All those late nights..." He shook his head, not wanting to go there, as he continued. "It was hard for me to swallow the fact that a seventeen year old could unnerve me so well. I thought after your 16th birthday, it would have been enough. I kissed you, got it out of my system, and I could finally move on. But it only became worse. What I felt for you was way out of line, girl." He confessed as he stopped his movement and looked to her for a response.
"No, it wasn't Tommy! It wasn't because you know it was what I felt too." She passionately proclaimed. She was slowly starting to get it, but it didn't make him right.
"How did I know for sure?" He asked her. When she was about to cut in he shook his head. "No, let me finish. How could I could be sure that it was more than just a silly crush for you? That what you felt went beyond infatuation, admiration. I needed to be sure Jude." And he was sure. He had his sources, and he knew how she felt for him while he was away. That's why he was so shocked about her and Chris. He had figured she'd been willing and ready when he came back. "Because when it was finally right for us to take it further, I wouldn't be as unselfish this time around." She knew he was referring to tonight, she could see it in his eyes.
He came towards her again as he took her face in his palms urgently. "I'm done with being noble." He proclaimed as he looked into her eyes. "I'm going to be selfish about you; I'm going to make up for lost time; and I don't plan on giving you up. You're mine now, girl, so make sure this is what you want." He asked her, only wanting one answer. He knew this should have all been said before, before tonight, before they went took them to another level, but it was better late than never.
Jude tried to ignore the tingle that Tommy's words sent up her spine. She also needed to be sure. "So you…you were never tired of me?" She inquired hopefully.
"Never." He said, not missing a beat.
Jude nodded her head in his grasp. "And…you did it for me? Because you thought it was what I needed?" She questioned, referring to him leaving. Even though she felt the way he dealt with everything was wrong, she knew his heart was in the right place.
"Yes." He declared with certainty. "Yes, Jude I had to give you what I thought you needed and I wanted to be positive-" Jude cut him off by put a single finger on his lips to hush him.
"Just shut up and kiss me." She slowly smiled. Tommy happily obliged as he brought his mouth to hers.
10 AM
Tommy came to as he felt his pocket vibrate. He was still dressed only in his jeans from the night before. He looked over to where Jude laid in his shirt. He made sure she was still sound asleep before he quietly hopped out of bed and made his way towards the bathroom. He dug out his phone from his pocket, feeling it pulsate in his hand as he looked at the caller ID.
"Hello Georgia." He whispered when he hit the talk button.
"Tommy, hey mornin'" She said quickly before she cut to the chase. "Did you see Chris last night?"
Tommy sighed. "Yeah, yeah we did" He closed the door a little, so to not disturb Jude.
"It seems what he said about Jude came around and bit him big time." She told him, referring to the lies he spewed about her.
"What do you mean?"
"It seems that most of the press see Chris for what he is, a jealous, cold, bitter ex-boyfriend, and don't give him much credit for last night." Georgia explained animatedly. "What I'm trying to say is it's okay for you guys to come home earlier than planned. In fact you can come home today. EJ can work on a press release of some sorts to smooth over any bumps, and you can go back to recording the album. I mean it's not perfect yet, but it's better than when you both left." She said referring to the press and their situation.
"Ehh," Tommy began his voice somewhat high. "Oh, I don't know about coming home just yet, Georgia."
"What do you mean?" Her voice seemed curious.
Tommy peered through the door at Jude's sleeping form. "You know, she's still coming to terms with everything, and last night really upset her. She doesn't want to be back right now. She needs at least another day or two to recuperate. It's really stressful for her." He heard Jude yawn contently as he finished the sentence. She called out his name lightly as she started to wake. "Uh, Listen I gotta go now, okay? But about those few other days…" He trailed off hopefully.
"Of course, Tommy. You tell Jude to take all the time she needs, and that she can come home whenever she's ready." Georgia responded honestly. "Just make sure our girl, is okay." She left Tommy with that order before they hung up. He watched Jude stir and look around for him. "Oh I will, Georgia, don't worry I will." He said to himself as he pocketed the phone and walked out to her.
"Hey." He smiled as he plopped down next to her. She turned towards him and grinned.
"Hey yourself." She said, yawning again as she stretched her arms over her head. Tommy leaned forward and brushed a piece of hair away that had fallen in front of her face when she moved. "Were you on the phone?" She asked as she pushed them both down to the mattress, so that he was lying next to her. She thought she heard him talking to somebody in the bathroom a few seconds ago, but she wasn't sure.
He draped his arms around her as he spoke. "Ah, yeah it was Georgia." He simply said as Jude placed her head on his chest.
"Mm, what did she want?" She closed her eyes a little, still feeling tired.
"Well, she thinks it would be best if we continued to stay here, after what happened last night. The press is going crazy with what Chris said. She figures we still need to stay out of sight, to lay low for awhile, at least until she and EJ can figure out a way to smooth things over." He lied easily as he stroked Jude's hair.
Jude's heavy lidded eyes opened to look at him. He smiled down at her reassuringly. "Hm, okay." She shut them again as she drifted back to sleep, not giving it another thought.