ABC owns them

Chapter 10 (NC-17)

John heard what she said about them dying the night she became afraid and he knew this, all of this had to do with that. He held her hand and wanted nothing more at this point to grab her and hold her but he knew, she more than likely wouldn't let him. He saw her started to fumble for the next words to stay.

"I Loved them, you know, I never use that word anymore, haven't since them, I mean... I have a great family now. I'm sure I feel the same for them, maybe not the same way yet but I...never tell them, can never tell them, and I won't ever tell them." she said getting choked up. He ignored his thought about it being to soon to hold her and he pulled her towards him. She allowed it this time, and he held her head to his chest as they continued talking.

"Are you alright to tell me how?" he asked her as he held her close. He felt her nod her head before she started to speak.

"It was my fault... they died because of me... because I Loved them, and because they loved me, I was so stupid, really stupid...I... I was maybe fifteen, had been living with them for almost three years, three pretty nice years...I..." she started to say and she couldn't. She pulled off of him, moved away, and went back to the window

"I can't talk anymore, I just can't do it," she told him as she walked by the front window again.

"I'm going out on the porch to be alone" she told him and she went out.

John watched her on the porch, she sat there staring out into space, she was all teary, and as much as he wanted to go to her he knew it would be a mistake.

Almost two hours later she still hadn't come in, he glanced on her every now and then, she was still in the same stop still staring out into space looking at absolutely nothing. It was starting to get dark, she had eaten anything all day, he felt helpless, he couldn't take feeling that way any longer. He walked out on the porch to her.

John walked over to her, she was still in the same stop, position she was when she went out there hours ago, and she didn't even flinch or look when she heard him coming towards her. He bent down, started to pick her up as he spoke gently to her.

"You can trust me," he told her as he carried her into the cabin, she went with him, she pulled her arms around his neck the minute he picked her up and she didn't protest.

John pulled the covers down the bed gently and laid her down. She was almost out of his arms when she looked at him for the first time since before she went on the porch.

"Please John, please, I need to feel something other than pain," she told him and he knew what she was pleading with him for, to do. He laid down next to her in the bed, he softly, gently started to kiss her lips as her eye's closed.

Natalie started to forget, forget if only for a short time, his lips were making her forget, making her feel something, something good, she kissed him back softly, as she felt his hands move to the back of her head and bring her in closer.

Natalie knew this was a mistake; another one but right now, she needed this mistake. She needed someone, she needed him which she knew might make things worse in t he long run but she ignored it, she was vulnerable and she didn't care at this moment in time, in this moment and time she would trust him, if only for this time, if only for this…

John looked into her eyes one last time as he lowered his mouth down her neck, gently kissing and running his lips down each and every inch of her soft neck on his way to his next destination, her breasts. John's hands came upon the flannel material of the shirt she was wearing. His mouth wet it to moisten it. He took his fingers and started to unbutton the buttons that held it closed, one by one he unbuttoned the shirt as his lips kissed its way down her chest further as the skin was exposed. All her buttons were undone and Natalie let out a deep sigh as his mouth came upon her breast. His tongue, warm and slick ignited her nipple to a hardened peak as one of his hands took her other breast and started caressing it at first and then flicking at the nipple as he pushed her back up against the bed. He pulled himself on top of her as he continued his journey to help her forget, to feel.

Natalie moaned out in anticipating as his mouth took her nipple over and over, she brought her arms to his back and ran her nails gently up and down his back, racking his skin as she felt him move off of her.

John pulled himself off of her for a moment, he looked at her, her eyes were closed, and he wanted nothing more than to please her, pleasure her, make her happy, all night if he had too. He reached for her pants, pulled them down along with her panties and he heard her let out a small moan. He smiled, remembering for a moment how verbal she had been with their last encounters, he got lost in it for a minute exciting himself even more. He threw the last of her clothing to the ground, as he quickly rid himself of his.

Natalie felt him pull off her clothing, she opened her eye's just in time to see him quickly pulling at his own clothing, she sighed as he stood naked in front of her for a brief second before bringing his body closer to hers on the bed.

Slowly John moved back on the bed closer to her. He brought his naked aroused body by her ankles; he started to run his hands slowly up one leg as his mouth ran along her other. Still moving at a slow pace almost teasing her with his deliberate actions as his mouth came upon her inner thigh. He licked on her inner thigh till her legs spread slightly at first and then more open as she started to run her hands down her own breasts, trying so desperately to touch him somewhere, anywhere. Her hands barely grazed the top of his head and she let them linger.

John's warm mouth moved from her inner part of her thigh to her center. He started to nick, with his mouth, at the outer part till his tongue took over. His tongue entered her warm moist core and started in a deep action immediately. Thrusting his tongue about inside her over and over not letting up or stopping as he heard her started to moan louder. He reached a hand up, up her body to her breast grazing over the nipple of one of her breast as his tongue felt her start to pulsate. She started to move up and down and he still didn't let up. He started pushing his tongue harder, deeper inside her as he felt her let go. He continued his actions only softer as he felt her come down from it; he felt her walls start to relax. He brought his body up on hers as he saw her whole body relax.

Natalie moaned, she couldn't breath for a few minutes as he performed such tortuous actions on her, she had let go a few minutes ago and then she felt his body move up on her, she opened her once closed eye's and looked right into his. Almost as if looking into his soul. She studied his eyes as he did hers for a few seconds as she reached with her mouth and took his, deeply, softly. She moved her arms around his back completely this time and ran her hands to his ass, she pulled him even closer, letting him know she wanted more, she had more.

John felt her hands on his ass, he wasn't dumb, he had already known how she was, what she was capable of from that night. He also knew how to gage her, how to read what it was she wanted from him. And right now, right now he knew she wanted him inside, right now he knew, knew he wanted to be inside her more than anything. He pushed himself gently inside her, slowly as he pushed deeply, Natalie pulled her legs up and around him, helping to pull him in deeper as he started to slowly move himself inside her, as he started to slowly pushed back hard and then pull almost out slowly.

Tortuous actions on quick and slow drove at her. Hell it was driving at him; he felt it close for himself. He fought it for few minutes, waiting for her again as he heard her gasp for air causing a low raspy moan and he let it go just as she let it go, moving their bodies up and down joined together it was over in a matter of a few minutes.

It was over; he had just made love to her. Not sex like they had on their first endeavor together but Love for John. He moved out of her and laid next to her, he almost held his breath waiting. Waiting to see if she retreated and ran, to see if she wanted to run and hide, to see if she even wanted him to hold her, to snuggle up close and make things right for her. He waited as she finally came around to looking at him, she turned her whole body on her side to face him, and she looked into his face. He wanted so desperately for there to be more, he wanted so desperately to caress her face, to tell her, tell her he was definitely falling for her but... but he knew she wasn't ready for it. He smiled at her, she gave him a weak smile back, she brought her hand to his face, and she caressed it as she looked into his eyes.

"Thank you," she told him and she closed her eyes and started to drift off to sleep leaving her hand on his face.