Chapter 15
Severus sat listening with rapt attention to the young witch as she meticulously caught him up to speed on her work thus far. She told him all of it from the beginning to the end. He could not understand how something so simple could be the correct answer.
Over and over again he asked for notes and even to see her thoughts in the Pensieve as she recounted her story. By the end of the day, he was even more impressed with her business sense, almost as much as her recent development. Though, he didn't tell her so.
The following day, Severus apparated back to Hermione's office and found that she had her legion of house elves hard at work creating an office of his own within the library. He was shocked and muttered a 'Thank You' as Hermione busied herself with her research. Indeed working with her proved to be an easy thing. When she was deep inside of a problem, she forgot all of her surroundings. This sat well with Severus, as he didn't look forward to having her breathing down his neck.
She didn't. He stalked past her in the mornings and spent the day in his "office'. Hermione would pop in in the evening and offer him supper, and Severus would refuse. Shortly afterwards, he would leave to go home.
What he was finding the most attractive was the puzzle before him of the potion. She never explained to him how she received the information, she had actually said it was on a 'need to know basis'. So Severus poured through his books and begrudgingly reported to her that he still had not found an answer.
He would be returning to Hogwarts soon and then he would only becoming on most weekends. Severus found that this work suited him very well, and contemplated staying in the land of the Irish after his retirement.
It was on his last evening at MagiCall that Severus decided to stay late and take his super at his desk. He summoned a house elf and requested his food. As the elf winked from the room, Severus stood and stretched his long limbs. He would be leaving late this evening and wanted to give Ms. Granger his report, so he left his desk and hurried towards the lab.
His mind was still wrapped around the illusive potion. There was no such potion that was purple and retained a sweet taste. Much less, emitting a fine mint green mist. He found that the draught of patience was purple, but it emitted no mist and tasted like a broth. So confusing was this potion for it's properties conflicted with everything he knew of potions. Usually a purple color would signal, to the knowledgeable potions student, that it was a bitter taste. However, the green mist was also the problem. When a potion, brewed correctly or course, emitted a mist of the same color, it meant that the effects were on a time line. The effects of a potion with a different color mist meant something wholly different. It meant that the mixture was so potent that it needed to be mixed with another, inactive ingredient. Severus was afraid that this potion that he was in search of was a quest in the dark.
He stopped in the doorway.
Hermione was sitting on a stool with her head in her hands. She appeared to be crying. Her shoulders shook with silent sobs and in her arms lay a…dead plant.
Severus couldn't understand what was bothering the young witch. Perhaps she was overworked? Or worse, having a meltdown? He wrestled with himself whether he should stay or go.
However it was her voice that made his mind up for him.
"Professor? Are you leaving?" The young witch made a valiant effort to wipe the tear stains from her cheeks as she spoke. Severus shook his head.
"No. Not yet at any rate. I have more to do still before I go." He was uncomfortable. Uncomfortable with her and with any woman who cried.
She made no effort to share her feelings with him and he made no effort to learn them. She took the potted plant from the table and placed it in the garbage.
Just as the uncomfortable silence was growing, a scratching noise at her window attracted both sets of eyes. A snow white owl sat, waiting for Hermione to let her in. Apparently Ms. Granger knew this owl, and for a fleeting moment, he thought he did too. She untied the letter from the owl and it swooped away, not even waiting for a return letter.
She read through her letter and frowned.
"Professor, perhaps we should call it a night now." Hermione began to shuffle papers on the lab table and Severus noticed how she refused to meet his eyes.
"I was under the assumption you wanted me to finish the potions directory this evening?" Severus saw that her agitated state became worse as he spoke. She glanced at her watch a few times as the minutes wore on. Severus had a sneaking suspicion that the letter was from someone of the male persuasion and that Ms. Granger wanted him gone as soon as possible.
"Uh…yes…maybe if we break for awhile and return to this next weekend…" her voice trailed off. Severus rolled his eyes at her and stalked from the room.
Fine.
Severus battled with the desire to continue searching the properties of the elusive potion and eating food. He had forgone lunch and was famished. He was looking forward to eating his dinner as he sat in the quiet library.
Severely angry, Severus shrunk three books and placed then in his pocket. He gathered his notes and headed for the door. He did not stop to speak to Hermione on the way out. He simply stepped into the lobby and apparated.
It barely had time to register that in the seconds before he apparated, he heard her fireplace light up as if someone was flooing in…
Harry stepped from the fireplace and heard a loud crack. He knew that sound and knew that someone had just apparated from the other room.
He walked into the office and down the familiar hallway.
"Hermione?" he called out to her. Hermione appeared at the doorway of her lab and beckoned him in. Harry stepped inside and saw the lab as it usually was. Clean and sterile. Whatever work she was doing had been halted and the room void of any hint of what she was working on. Harry never guessed or ever desired to know what she worked on in here. He was here for a completely different reason.
"Who just left?" Harry asked in a casual tone as he seated himself on a stool watching Hermione write notes in a journal. She did not look at him as she spoke.
"My new assistant. I have a rather heavy load and I have acquired someone who works for me in the evenings and weekends." she turned to face him and brushed a strand of fly away hair from her face. "What's going on Harry? You said you were coming right over and that it was important."
Harry looked down at his hands and studied his knuckles. He breathed deeply and meet her brown eyes.
"'Mione, we've been friends for a long time and…I wanted to talk to you about something. Something important." Hermione saw the nervousness in his mannerisms and heard the slight shake in his voice. She frowned and nodded slightly. A dull feeling of dread beginning in her stomach.
"I…well…see…" he ran his hand unconsciously through his already tussled hair. "I have a problem Hermione." he said finally.
Hermione understood. She had suspected that seeing Ginny again would spark something between the two and she closed the distance between them and sat on a stool next to him. She placed her hand on his shoulder as she spoke.
"Harry, whatever is the matter, just tell me. I will help you no matter what, you know that." Harry nodded and studied his hands again.
"Hermione…are you lonely?" His question was soft, but it carried with it a weight that both of them felt. Hermione's hand fell from his shoulder and she began to twirl a loose strand of hair in her fingers.
"Well, what do you mean?" she asked.
"You know what I mean Hermione. You work all the time. You hardly ever take time off and you even live in here! I completely understand Hermione, I mean, if I could conjure a bedroom in the Ministry, I would. But I can't. I mean, do you ever get tired of it? Being alone all the time? Working so much?" His eyes finally met hers and she was the one to look down for a moment.
"Yes. I do get lonely. There aren't many people I can talk to about anything anymore. So much of my work is confidential. So many people wouldn't even understand it." except one… "But I'm happy Harry. Aren't you?" Harry gave her a half laugh and stretched his arms above him and them slumped down.
"Hermione, you and me, we are the same you know. Both of us are hiding from the world outside. Both of us saw too much too soon and now we are more comfortable alone than with other people. What if…" his voice stopped suddenly as he looked at her. Hermione felt the cold weight sit heavier in her stomach.
"What Harry?" Hermione felt his gaze and met his vivid green eyes.
"'Mione, what if we were to…what I mean is…why can't we be together?"
There it was. Like a silent, unknown disease, Hermione's stomach erupted into a painful knot. She felt shock, pity, pain and most of all, she felt nothing but friendship for the young man sitting before her. His eyes glowed intensely as he sat back and waited for her to respond. She saw him breathing heavily and she wanted to cry.
How could this have happened? How did it come to this? Hermione dropped her head and she felt his hand on hers. She looked back up into his sparkling eyes and sighed.
He was her friend. A dearly loved friend. But she did not, and had never, felt anything other than that for him. The ramifications of her denying this were great. She knew it would hurt him. She knew it would probably cost her his friendship. He took a great risk coming here tonight and telling her this. But the ramifications were worse if she accepted. First off, she felt nothing for him but a sisterly love. Second, it would cost them both just about every friend they had.
"Harry…oh Harry…" Hermione felt the tears streak her face and with his thumb he brushed them aside. His face was getting closer and Hermione knew instantly that he misunderstood her exclamations and her tears.
Oh no…he's getting too close…
A/N: Uh oh...Harry, Harry, Harry...what are you thinking?