Hi all! Sorry I've kept you waiting, but I have been away in London since last Wednesday. If you want to read bout what happened on my travels and about what I overheard some woman say about the Party at the Palace and Rupert Grint then you can check out my blog link in my profile!

This chapter is a bit sadder than the others...someone dies...thought I'd better warn you before you all start shouting at me, but to be fair the story is a sad one, the title kind of gives that away! But on a happier note the next chapter isn't really sad coughs calm before the storm coughs

Let me know what you think. Enjoy!

Step ;)

Chapter 3 – In my sleep

A year after we set off for Godric's Hollow, we got some devastating news. Tonks had been killed by a group of Death Eaters at the house her and Remus had only just moved in to. When Hedwig found us we knew that the news was not good. She was only to be used when we had to be found, for news of the worst kind, as she could easily have been followed. Initial annoyance subsided, however, when we read the note she had carried hundreds of miles to deliver to us.

We instantly apparated back to Grimmauld place with Hedwig swaying dangerously on Harry's shoulder. What met us when we walked through the door was quiet but ever present sobbing. Tears formed in my eyes instantly and Ron subconsciously took my hand in his. I followed Harry through to the kitchen, leading Ron down the narrow hallway.

When I entered the room I saw Molly holding onto Ginny as if her life depended on it. Ginny had grown taller since the last time I saw her and was looking as beautiful as ever, even though her eyes were red and slightly puffy. She too was crying but with a bit more control than Molly. Arthur was stood at the far end of the room, and was leant over the kitchen sink holding onto the side for support. Finally my eyes rested on Remus who was paler than I had ever seen anyone to be. When he turned to look at Harry he started to cry. Harry pulled him up from his seat and hugged him. Remus held onto Harry and started to sob loudly into his shoulder.

On hearing Remus, Molly and Ginny looked up, wondering where the noise was coming from. They spotted Ron and me and hurried over to us, enveloping us in hugs like Harry had with Remus. Molly nearly suffocated Ron, but he didn't seem to mind, he just held her and tried awkwardly to comfort her. I pulled back from Ginny and I looked her in the eye, she blinked trying to rid her eyes of her tears and looked back at me, a questioning and confused look filling her face. I knew the question she wanted to ask me so I answered before she had time to ask.

'I don't know Ginny; I don't know why it had to happen to her. It's not fair, nothing's fair any more.'

On my words she started to cry again, and the small amount of composure I had manage to gather crumbled instantly. I pulled her towards me and tried to comfort her again. I looked over her shoulder and saw Remus pull away from Harry and walk to the other end of the room, nearer to Arthur but still stood away from him, as if trying to avoid any human contact. Harry turned to look at me, silently asking what he could do to help the only person left associated with his parents, the person who had tried to fill Sirius's shoes when he'd died. I had no words for him; I was as clueless as he was.

Ginny looked up at me, I stepped back from her slightly.

'You've grown,' I whispered. It was such a trivial thing to say but it seemed to diffuse some of the tension. Ginny smiled.

'Either that or you've shrunk!' she replied, glad of the change of subject. Our smiles soon faded however, when Molly released Ron and pulled me into a hug. She'd never really stopped crying, but when she hugged me she started again which in turn set me off. Ron watched me hug his mum; he put his hand on my shoulder and gave it a squeeze trying to give his own comfort.

He moved his hand and automatically traced the scar I had managed to acquire across my left cheek. It wasn't gained in a spectacular way, I had just walked past a particularly ferocious branch of a tree in the dark and one of the spines had dug deep into my cheek. I'd ignored it at the time, not realising quite how deep it had gone, and it was only when Ron looked at me when we had finally been able to light our wands, and gasped loudly that I realised how much blood had escaped from it and covered most of the left side of my face.

I'm not really sure what happened the rest of that night. It was late when we arrived, and quite a few members of the Order passed through the house to see if the news they'd heard was true, and to offer their condolences to Remus. Eventually at about three in the morning we went to bed. The thought to go back to our business crossed mine, Ron's and Harry's mind, but we decided we could do with a good night's sleep, and none of us wanted to leave the house.

Harry went into the room he and Ron had shared the previous times they had stayed at the house. Ron and I went up to the room the twins used. I saw Ginny slip into Harry's room before I went up to the next floor. I was glad she had, they both needed to be comforted in a time like this, and they would probably help each other sleep. That was what I was hoping Ron would help me do.

We changed into the spare night things that we always kept at Grimmauld Place in case of impromptu arrivals just like this one. We got into bed and held onto each other as if our lives depended on it. A tear crossed the bridge of Ron's nose as he lay opposite me; I freed my hand from his and wiped it off before it dropped onto the pillow.

'I'd tell you not to cry, but I think I'm about to start,' I said and sure enough, as soon as the words had left my mouth tears filled my eyes. Ron mirrored my actions as one escaped, and wiped it off with the corner of the quilt.

He tried to say something but I guess he couldn't find the words he wanted to say. I stopped him as he tried for the second time.

'Shh, let's just try and sleep okay? We could do with some, I don't know how long it's been since we slept in a comfortable bed.'

He managed to raise half a smile.

'I love you,' I whispered.

'I love you too,' he managed to reply.

We both shut our eyes and not too long after fell asleep.

If I thought that was the end of my crying that night I was wrong, I dreamed of Tonks and everyone else we had lost in the fight so far. In every case we had heard detailed reports of how they had died, and those images filled my dreams. I'd never before cried in my sleep, but the death of another close friend had that effect. I woke up several times that night and found my face wet with tears, some I remembered crying, others I didn't. Occasionally I looked over at Ron, and saw he was doing the same. I tried to wipe them away without waking him, and I succeeded.

I closed my eyes again and tried to think about the happier times we'd had, the adventures we'd had at school, but because more than one of them involved Voldemort my mind kept coming back to Tonks and the cycle would start over again.

That was the third way I cried – In my sleep.