7. The Lost Brother

For a moment, there was silence in the clearing. Even the children couldn't utter a word. Only Jian stayed calm and stroked a string of his musical instrument. "I didn't know that you have a brother, dad."

Quickly, Xia covered his beak. Shen didn't seem to have known it, too... or did he? The white peacock stood there thunderstruck, but he still managed to stay on his feet. But since Jian had already expressed his thoughts, Xia wanted to hear an answer immediately, too, just to know how to behave.

"Father, did you know that?"

At last, the white peacock broke out of his numbness. The old goat's testimony had thrown him off the track mentally. Usually, he was used to hear strange quotes from her, but nothing like that. And instead of answering his older daughter's question, his behavior turned into aggressiveness. "What do you mean with "it could be"?" he hissed. "Do I or I don't?!" His voice was loud. The goat looked down in deep sorrow, but that made Shen just angrier. "What is it?! Haven't you got a tongue in your head, or what?!"

Suddenly, to everyone's surprise, the goat stood up on her walking stick. "Your parents didn't want you to know it," she replied in a firm voice. "They thought it was the best, and everyone else, that he should be forgotten."

Po, who was also still a bit dazed by this new knowledge, understood nothing at all. "Uh, why so?" He looked around, but he only found confused faces.

Only Master Ox and Master Croc were the exception to this surprise, with the only difference that Master Croc looked deeply dismayed, while Master Ox only let out a snort of disdain. "The one who you mean has long been dead."

Shen jerked around and looked at the two masters in disbelief. "You knew about it?"

The ox raised his nose. "I didn't see a reason why I should have said it to you. You have already failed to appreciate the family heritage and trampled it under your feet. You even tore down your own house..."

Shen jumped up. "Will this be held against me until the end of my life?!"

Ox and peacock stared at each other. "If I enjoy it, then yes," the ox countered.

"Please, stop it!" Yin-Yu intervened and pulled Shen away from Master Ox. "Don't argue again."

At least that drew Shen's attention back to the goat, who still owed him an explanation.

"Why don't I know anything about it?" he snapped at her. "Or was he born before me?! How old is he?!"

The goat swallowed hard, having difficulty answering because of Shen's torrent of words. "He's younger…"

"You told me that my parents didn't want any more children after me?!" he yelled at her. "What's that supposed to mean?!"

The goat raised her hoof calmly. "Shen, yes, yes, it's true, they really couldn't bring themselves to have new children. It would never have occurred to them to replace you. You were theirs all in all…"

"HOW CAN I HAVE A BROTHER THEN?!"

"Maybe you could let her get a word first," Master Ox said with his nasty grin. Somehow, he enjoyed seeing the white peacock so confused.

"Shen, if you calm down, I'll tell you," the old lady said.

Shen's eyes narrowed viciously. "Don't you dare hide something from me again!"

"I'll tell you everything," she assured. "Just please do me the favor and don't get into a rage."

Shen was about to start another tough argument when Yin-Yu took him reassuringly but firmly by the shoulders and looked at him pleadingly.

"Your mother was pregnant while you were banished," the goat explained. "So she could never tell you. She didn't even know at the time that she was pregnant. And he was born a month later after you left the city." She covered her eyes and shook her head sadly. "It broke your mother's heart when he was born. He looked like you. His feathers were white as snow... even the eyes were the same..." She sighed heavily. "After he hatched, she collapsed crying. He had reminded her of you so much that it was a shock to her."

Shen's eyes narrowed. "How so? She could be happy to have something that looked like me."

"She didn't want anyone else," she assured him. "She only wanted you. Even though he looked like you... He was born like you... But your mother could never love him. She couldn't... since day one..."

Gongmen City, 28 years ago

The doctor, an old lizard, closed the bag and cast another worried glance at the white chick in the bed, which was wrapped in blankets. The small chest rose and fell slightly. It was still breathing a little hard through its beak, but it wasn't as bad as in the evenings after it had hatched. His father stood by the bed and watched it with concern.

The lizard flickered his forked tongue. He was a mixture of monitor lizard and basilisk. He wasn't that big. His tongue was that of a monitor lizard, but the stature of a basilisk lizard and even the oddly shaped feet and scaly shields on his back, if not so pronounced, which is why some people called him a species of bastard. But he didn't mind that much. He was used to defamation. Nevertheless, his services were always welcome at the court of the royal palace in Gongmen City. Especially since he was the only doctor who had invented a medicine that had always saved the survival of the royal children. The lizard picked up a small bottle and he thoughtfully stroked a self-written label. Then he joined the lord. In terms of stature, the lizard reached the ruler just near the shoulder height.

"He's like him," he mumbled softly, handing the lord the bottle. "One dose in the morning, at noon and in the evening. That will revitalize his life force."

Lord Liang, a blue peacock, gratefully accepted the brew. "You were a great help to my first son. We are very grateful to you for this."

The mixed breed lizard waved it off. "That's my job. The health of your children is something special." He tried to formulate his sentence in such a way that it didn't sound derogatory. "Perhaps it could even help other children if the symptoms are recognized in time."

Lord Liang looked down. "It's strange," he said softly. "No matter whether with Shen or with him," his eyes wandered back to his little son. "Each of them has to deal with shortness of breath and circulatory problems shortly after birth. It seems to run in the family somehow. The last similar case was two generations ago."

The doctor nodded slowly. "As far as I know, any help came too late for this child. My sympathies."

The lord nodded gratefully. "The main thing is he's fine."

His gaze wandered to the window. The sun rose slowly and shrouded Gongmen City in a red morning light. The mother, Lady Ai, stood on the balcony and had been staring outside for hours. On the spur of the moment, Lord Liang went to the purple-pink peahen. "Ai, he's feeling better." But there was no answer from his wife. She stared motionless out the window. "Don't you want to look at your son?"

"My son?" Slowly, her gaze wandered to her husband, then she immediately turned her face away from him again. "I already have a son and he's out there somewhere."

Lord Liang sighed heavily. "I know, Ai. He looks like him, but he also needs us."

"His survival is ensured for the time being, my lady," the lizard doctor said. "The remedy worked well on your first son. It looks like it will help him in this case, too." With that, he took a paper block out of his pocket. "I would then have to write my doctor's report. What is the boy's name supposed to be?"

His eyes wandered between the lord and the lady, but Lady Ai didn't seem to have heard his question, which is why Liang asked again. "Ai, we have to give it a name. Maybe Sheng... or Zheng..."

"No!" she suddenly interrupted him and turned away from the window. "No, he will never replace him!"

The doctor looked after her in surprise. "And how should he be called then?"

"I do not care! Just not his name, or from the family, not even a name that sounds similar!"

"But Ai," her husband cut in again. "We have to give him a name. Can't you think of any?"

"Take any name!" Lady Ai said. "Take... take his!"

She pointed to the antelope guard who was standing by the door. Then she ran out of the room.

The lizard and the peacock watched her in silence.

"It's too early for her," the lord apologized to the doctor. "She hasn't gotten over Shen's conviction yet."

The lizard's eyes examined the lord. "But it seems, that it has not failed to leave its mark on you, too. Am I right, my lord?"

For a moment, it looked like Lord Liang would also break into despair, but then the peacock controlled himself again and lifted his head higher. "He killed many innocent people," he said with bitterness in his voice. "It was only justified that he should be punished for what he did."

The lizard frowned. As much as he himself was shocked when he heard about the massacre in the panda village, he would not have resented the lord of Gongmen City for feeling a deep regret. After all, he had been present when Shen was born, too, and the doctor still kept the picture of a helpless little white baby in his mind that he was able to keep alive with his experimental medicine.

They stood in the room in silence for a while, until they heard a quiet squeak from the bed. They turned around. The white chick had woken up and was stretching in the blankets. Immediately, the lord hurried to his bedside. The baby's eyes were open, which caused the lord's deepest sadness to rise again. They were really exactly the same as his brother's. Lord Liang imagined how pleased Shen would have been to have a brother who looked the same. Otherwise, there was never anyone who had the color of his feathers, which is why he was not very popular. Regardless of whether he was a child or a teenager. He had so missed having someone with whom he could share his looks and being different. And now it was there - but he was gone.

Sighing, the lord stroked the little body. The chick looked at the blue peacock with large red-black eyes. Then it kicked its little feet and stretched its wings towards its father.

Again, the lord was very sad. With Shen, he had held back with affection. At first, his chances of survival were very poor. The lord had been afraid to collapse from the grief of the loss, and from then on, he decided not to let Shen get close to him emotionally. He had thought that then he would be able to cope better with his death. It had been a miracle that Shen survived, and later, thanks to good medical treatment. But it had been a mistake that the lord hadn't immediately taken him to his heart out of fear.

He reached out his wings toward his son and lifted the kicking baby out of the blankets.

"Wait a little longer to fill out the forms," he finally turned to the doctor. "We'll come to an agreement on a name. Your wages will be sent to you."

The lizard shrugged. "As you wish, my lord," and put the notepad away again. Then he said goodbye, leaving Lord Liang with his son. The chick lolled again and looked up at his father, babbling. The lord sighed deeply. He looked at his newborn son, then at the guardian. Finally, he made an effort and walked over to the antelope. Ai wanted him to take his name. He examined the guardian. Maybe he would like the name after all.

"Well, what's your name?" he asked.

"Long-Long, my lord," the antelope answered.

"Long-Long?" Liang sounded a little disappointed. It wasn't exactly the name he'd imagined. "Well, thank you."

With these words, the lord stepped out of the room.

"Long-Long," Lord Liang muttered to himself as he walked the hallways with his son in the wings. Ai had climbed the stairs one floor higher, but the lord was taking his time. The guard's name was always on his mind and he imagined what the little one would be called later. "Lord Long-Long." Liang twisted his beak. Actually, he had imagined another name for his successor. "Long-Long, Long-Long. Lord Long-Long."

Somehow, Liang couldn't get used to it. On the way, they passed Shen's former room. The lord stopped and looked thoughtfully at the door. Perhaps that gave him other thoughts and perhaps also an opportunity for his son to come into indirect contact with his brother. It was difficult for the lord to enter this room, thinking that Shen would come up to him to see his sibling. What would he have asked? Would he have had a good name for his brother?

The lord walked slowly across the room with the chick. The room was like it was when Shen left. Nothing had been touched. Every cupboard, every table, every object was still in its place. When they passed a couple of weapons that Shen had placed on the wall for inspection, mostly simple sabers, the chick suddenly became active and stretched its little white wings for something. Lord Liang stopped and looked in amazement at the object that had caught the baby's attention.

"The dandao?" He looked at the single-edged saber. It had been Shen's first training weapon. "Your older brother had practiced with it."

Lord Liang indulged in his memories for a while. Shen had been so proud to have a weapon with which to make an impression. He had always wanted respect. At first, Lord Liang had objected, for fear he might hurt himself. But over time, Shen knew how to use weapons very well. It had amazed the lord himself how skillful he could be, which had been less evident in kung fu training. On the contrary, he was actually quite bad, even though the masters had taught him.

"Dandao," Lord Liang muttered to himself. "Dao."

Dao was an umbrella term for these weapons and was a rather unusual name for his family. But maybe... He looked thoughtfully at his young son. "Dao also means "the way"." He lifted the chick and examined it carefully. The baby was delighted to be lifted up and laughed. Lord Liang frowned. Maybe... just maybe. "Maybe you will find a way to him. - Dao."

When he entered the room, his wife did not look up. The lady of Gongmen sat on a chair with her head tilted to one side and covered with a wing. She didn't seem to want to see her second son.

When she heard her husband approach, she hesitantly moved her beak lips. "And? What was his name?"

"Dao," Liang lied. He hated lying.

His wife jumped up. "That was Shen's first weapon! No! Take something else..."

"AI!" her husband interrupted her abruptly. "Either this one or none at all! We cannot let him wander through life without a name. We can't do that to him. Unless you want me to baptize him Chen, Sheng, or Zhen! Would you prefer that?!"

For a while, the peahen looked speechless at her husband. Finally, she sank back on the chair and Liang guessed that she had nothing more to say about it. He felt the chick kick its wings. Smiling, he picked the chick up again. At least, it should give him something from his first son, even if his wife didn't like it. A little happily, he rubbed his beak on his son. "My little Dao."

The baby squealed happily. But his mother didn't hear her son's cheeping. She just sat there and stared into space.

The old goat sighed. "As if that wasn't bad enough. That what happened after that was much worse."

Now everyone else raised their heads, too. If the old lady said that, it must have been something really bad. Only Master Ox kept a straight face, because he, like Master Croc, already knew the story.

"What happened?" Po asked curiously. But the goat's words were again for Shen, who looked at her expectantly.

"Your mother could never break away from you," the old goat continued. "She never wanted to replace you. And whenever she saw Dao, he reminded her of you. Your mother could never accept him as her son. She just kept talking about you..." She sighed again. "Much to other's sorrow."

Three years later after Dao's birth...

With clumsy steps, the young white chick walked through the corridors of the palace. A loud voice came from his parents' room. Curiously, Dao poked his little head through the crack in the door. His mother and father were standing in the room. Lady Ai had buried her face in her wings and was crying. As so often. The chick had never seen her laugh before.

"I want my son! I want my son!" Ai shouted in a tearful voice.

Lord Liang shook his head sadly and took her in his wings. "But he's not here anymore." He took hold of her tear-streaked face and looked her straight in the eyes. "But Dao is also your son. You should give him the same love. He needs that."

Lady Ai opened her beak with difficulty. "I... I can't!"

At that moment, they saw the small figure in the door frame. Lady Ai only took one look, then she ran away quickly.

Dao looked after her sadly. "Did I chase mom away again?"

"No, no," his father assured him and hugged him. "She was just a little confused."

"So your father was mainly there for him," the goat continued. "But of course, that wasn't enough for Dao. Sometimes your brother couldn't stand it that your mother avoided him like a complete stranger. He wanted her attention so badly. And when the day came when you had left the city for exactly five years, he wanted to give her a special present. He had tried so hard to give her something nice, but instead, she ran away from him. She was so horrified by his efforts that she headlong left the city and wanted to find you. But as you know, she had an accident in the mountains. * And when she died in Gongmen City,… your brother blamed himself for her dead."

Gongmen City, 23 years ago

Lord Liang stayed by his dead wife's deathbed for a while before they finally covered her with a sheet. He walked away with heavy steps. The peacock stopped when he saw his five-year-old son standing in the doorway.

The white child looked at him aghast. Lord Liang stood in front of him quickly to block Dao's view to the covered bed, but the boy knew exactly what had happened.

"Mom is dead," the child breathed in a choked voice.

The lord looked down. "She fell asleep."

Gently, he laid his wings on Dao's shoulders. But that didn't calm the boy down.

"Mom died because of me."

Shocked by these words, the lord knelt in front of him. "That is not true! It was an accident."

Tears welled up in the boy's eyes. "It was my fault! I chased her away!"

Before his father could say anything, the boy pulled out of his embrace. "I killed her!" Weeping, the white boy ran out of the room.

His father ran after him, dismayed. "DAO!"

"Your brother ran away," the goat continued her story sadly. "I still remember exactly. I saw him running through the corridors, heard him cry. He ran through the guards. He couldn't be stopped. He fled the city. At least, those were the last statements where people had seen him running past the houses. Of course, everyone was searching for him afterwards. The whole area. But... but all what they found of him was just his white robe that they had picked up somewhere in the forest." The goat leaned heavily on her walking stick. Apparently, she was still thinking of how desperate Lord Liang had been about it. "Your father looked for him for months," she said. "But he could never find him. After one year passed without finding a trace of him, he had to give up the search and your brother was pronounced dead. It was guessed that he had had an accident somewhere, but the body of a small white peacock cub was never found. On the other hand, no other white peacock was spotted anywhere in China later either. After the search stopped, your father made a decision finally. I was still talking to him. Then he said to me: "My first son was banished, my wife is dead, now my second son has also passed away." But he wanted to keep the promise which he had given to his wife on her deathbed. Namely, to make sure that you still have a future. You know the rest of it. Over the years, your father laboriously brought together the money you needed so that you could have an existence again. He died three years before you returned to Gongmen City. It has been 23 years since your brother disappeared. To this day one had never heard from him again and nobody has ever seen him again."

After the goat had finished her story with these words, she looked at Shen with a sad expression. Shen's beak lips began to quiver. "W-why didn't you tell me that?!"

"For what reason, Shen?" the goat replied. "Your brother was believed to be dead, why should you be told about a dead brother who barely existed? Besides, even if I meant to tell you, would you have cared? Back then you were only busy with your dream of conquering China."

"Then why didn't you tell me later?!"

The goat shook her head wistfully. "So that you can mourn a brother who you never knew and you never could have met?" She shook her head slowly. "You had already lost your parents. Why should I burden you with that, too? I was so glad you laughed properly once in a long time when you found your family again. Then why should I have told you something like that?" She looked down. "Shen, I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it."

A silence fell over the group. Shen looked at her for a while, then he looked down and massaged his forehead.

Po was the first one who dared to say a word again and looked at Yamato, who had also become silent. "Well, I guess that would make the case clear, wouldn't it?" the panda asked carefully to draw attention to the incident from earlier. "Then it couldn't have been Shen. I mean, then it was probably him. Or was it maybe someone else? And what was that again with the ninjas?"

Tigress gave him a nudge in the ribs. As much as Po was curious as the others, this question seemed rather inappropriate.

Only Master Ox had the impudence to bend over the hunched white peacock and add his two cents with a mocking tone. "Am I just imagining it, or have you now gained another experience?"

Shen struck him in the face with his foot, indignant, but the ox didn't mind. But instead of fighting further, the peacock simply ran away. Yin-Yu wanted to go after him, but the goat held her back. She knew, Shen wanted to be alone now.

King Wang scratched his head in confusion. "Honestly, this family always surprises me."

Po gave him a comforting look. "You're not the only one, buddy."

The Chinese word "Dao" can have different meanings depending on how it is pronounced. It can be called "Dāo - sword, blade" or "Dào - way". Others would be e.g. "Dǎo - island", but also other meanings in nouns, verbs etc. are possible, but this is not essential here. :3 Thanks for reading. :-)

I also thought, Dao would fit because the word "peacock" sounds similar to Dao in other languages like in German (Pfau), French (paon) and Spanish (pavo real).

* See "The Last Chance," Chapter 26