16. Time of Reflection

Gently, Ling knocked on the door. The old goat was sitting at a table looking at a few pages of painted paper. Quietly, the little sheep entered the room, holding a tray with fresh tea in his hooves.

"Here's the tea," he said, putting the tray down on the table. He had offered to make the next cup of tea while his great-aunt continued to rummage through her things. Curiously, he craned his neck and looked at the scrawl on a piece of paper. When his great-aunt caught his gaze, she lifted her head and smiled. "I just found this among all my literature," she explained. "I didn't even remember I kept those."

"What's that?" Ling asked, standing next to her so he could get a better look at the paper. What was depicted on it resembled an extremely simplified depiction of Gongmen City, however the roofs were crooked and the palace tower was a little thinner than it was actually built.

"Shen drew this picture when he was two years old," the goat answered. She put the paper in a pile and reached for another sheet of paper. "This is from him when he was three years old."

Ling frowned. The picture showed a blue bird that resembled a chicken, only the long feathers indicated that it was a peacock.

The goat laughed. "There he had painted his father while he was sitting next to his throne."

"Aha," Ling commented monotonously. He wasn't exactly a fan of art, although he had to admit that his childhood pictures weren't exactly a masterpiece either.

"And this? That looks a lot more professional." He pointed to a piece of paper that was peeking out from under all the other papers. "Was he older?"

The goat grabbed the end of the paper and pulled out the sheet. A neatly drawn portrait of Shen's mother emerged. She sighed heavily.

"It's from Dao." She looked at the drawing sadly.

"He could paint better than the master," Ling said.

The old goat stifled another sigh. "I suppose he wanted his mother to admire him for something for once." Gently, she leaned the picture against the stack of papers and looked at it wistfully. "Some people say that children's pictures reflect the children's souls." She rested her head on her hoof and stared at the picture, her thoughts seeming to drift far away. "Sometimes it's true... sometimes it's so true..."

For a while everything was quiet. Suddenly, something flitted through the air through the open window which the goat had left open to blow out all the old dust. The creature turned out to be a small bird with a small blue coat. It circled a few times, then it landed on the table in front of the two hoofed animals.

"Forgive me. Express delivery." With these words, the little bird took out a roll of paper and held it out to the old goat. "I'm sorry for being late. There was some turbulence on the flight. Have a nice day." And just as quickly as he had flown in, he was gone just as quickly.

Ling's mouth twisted. "Well, honestly. Airmail isn't what it used to be either. Always late."

"Well, the main thing is that it arrives at some point," the goat said cheerfully and looked at the sender. "Oh, it's from Yin-Yu." She unrolled the paper and scanned the lines. Her face became more and more worried, which did not go unnoticed by her grandnephew. "Is anything wrong?"

"Xiang is also in the Valley of Peace," she got straight to the point.

Ling's mouth went down again in the basement. "Oh dear."

"He and Liu are even expecting offspring," the goat continued. "And it could happen very soon."

The little sheep frowned. "I'm surprised she made him do it. Then the master had better not go after his family... If he should return within that period. Otherwise, there will only be fireworks again. In a negative sense."

But the old goat shook her head indecisively. "I don't know, Ling, whether it's wise to keep the two separate in the long run. I can't shake the feeling that something is wrong."

With these words, she reached into her coat and pulled out a blue feather.

Ling's eyes widened in surprise. "You still carry his feather around with you?"

The goat did not respond to this question. Instead, she was preoccupied with an entirely different matter. "I kept thinking to myself whether I shouldn't have done it when we were in Gongmen City many years ago."

"Doing what?" Ling asked in surprise.

A large wrinkle formed on the goat's forehead. "I still have to think about that. It could maybe…" She paused. "This blue peacock is a mystery to me. No matter how many times I met him, I was always drawn to him. And when he was pulled out of the rubble, half dead, I couldn't help but give him some aid."

Ling inclined his head. "Why are you so interested in him? After all, he wanted to do great harm to the master."

The goat twisted the feather between her hooves. "Ling, when I saw Xiang in the Hun Castle for the first time, screaming in chains and vowing revenge, I had a strange feeling. A strange familiar feeling."

"Strange familiar?" Ling found this even harder to relate to, while his great-aunt kept trying to explain.

"I really thought, I was seeing Shen's father in front of me. He looks so darn like him. So similar. This similarity."

She faltered, staring at the blue feather in her hoof as if it hypnotized her.

Ling looked at her helplessly, then he preferred to leave the room. "Uh... I'll put some more water on."

He took the tray with the cold tea and left his great-aunt, who was still staring at the blue feather. But she didn't even seem to notice how her great-nephew was walking away. Her thoughts were only focused on the feather. It wasn't just this one she knew. She had met a blue feather somewhere else...

Many years ago, sometime in Shen's childhood

Quietly, she walked down the dark corridor that led directly to the archives. The gate had been open, and she suspected she would find the lord there. The soothsayer was surprised that Lord Liang made a depressed impression that day. Little Shen had complained that his father had kicked him out of his parents' room. She didn't want to waste time and wanted to have a word with his father. She had known Lord Liang for a long time and his withdrawn mood was not typical for him.

She paused when she saw a faint glow of light shimmering from the archive room. She wondered whether she should catch his attention immediately. But then she decided to get an idea of what kind of mood the lord was in now. Maybe she even came at an inopportune moment and she wanted to avoid angering the lord. Slowly, she put one hoof on the other until she finally reached the gate to the archives. Cautiously, she peeked in and was again surprised by the lord's strange behavior. The blue peacock stood in front of the large painting of himself and his wife, Lady Ai. But it had been pushed to the side so that it now hung crookedly on the wall. In one wing the ruler of Gongmen City held an open black box, in the other he held a small blue feather, which he regarded with a sad expression. Then he placed it gently into the box, as if he was afraid, it might fall apart at any touch. Then he added a small roll of paper. Then he closed the box and pushed it into a niche in the wall. Apparently, he had loosened a wall stone behind the painting so that there was a small cavity behind it, in which the box fit well. As soon as it disappeared into the hollow in the wall, Lord Liang leaned against the wall, sighing, as if he was going through a sudden feeling of faintness. The goat narrowed her eyes. Quietly, she backed a few steps into the hallway, then she called softly, "Lord Liang? Are you here?" as if she had just arrived.

She heard a quick push, then a hesitant: "Yes, what do you want?"

When the goat appeared in the doorway, the lord had already pushed the picture back into its place. The old woman didn't show anything and looked questioningly at the lord. "I've been looking for you. And somebody told me, that you were here."

The goat felt uneasy again. Usually, Lord Liang was a confident ruler. Even before his servants. But now there stood the form of an inwardly depressed man who didn't exactly look like he'd just had a little argument with his son.

"Is something bothering you?" she asked.

"What? Uh… no!" Immediately, the peacock straightened his back and lifted his head reassuringly. "I was just looking for something. After this one." Quickly, he walked to a shelf and pulled out a scroll.

"Did you want something in particular from me?" he asked in his usual busy voice, which surprised the goat again. While she wasn't a mind reader, she sensed he was faking his confidence. And she realized he didn't want that anyone knew he was hiding something in the wall.

The goat sighed at that memory. She had never dared to look behind the painting. She wasn't someone who constantly meddles in other people's affairs or spy behind their backs. But she had to admit that she had sometimes accidentally walked past the hidden corridor from the archive and kept asking herself the same question as to what Lord Liang was hiding. Curiosity often tickled her, and to her embarrassment, she had occasionally thought just taking a quick peek. But then she was constantly worried that there would be serious consequences if she ever opened this box. She sighed and put the feather away. This uncertainty made her stomach ache. She got up to prepare a calming tea in addition to the usual tea.

Many, many kilometers away from Gongmen City, someone else was thinking about the blue peacock, too. Although it was already getting dark, Shenmi didn't want to go back to the guest apartment. Instead, she lay alone by a small pond on the outskirts of the village, staring into her reflection in the water. Her figure stood out in contrast to her surroundings. Anyone who didn't know her might have thought she was a forest spirit. But Shenmi didn't come here to scare unsuspecting people. She was still thinking about her mother's words after she had told her to keep her distance from Xiang, to which Shenmi reluctantly agreed. At least for today. She hadn't promised.

Thoughtfully, she nudged her paper boat in the water, which she had previously folded. The waves swung it gently. The white peacock girl also felt as if she was being pushed back and forth by waves. Everyone, even Xiang himself, told her to leave him alone. But the little one could not make friends with these thoughts. She kept thinking about him. But was it really just his physical appearance that fascinated her so much about him? She thought back to the conversation which he had with the Dragon Warrior a long time ago when Xiang had rejected her so callously and she ran away from him crying.

"Because of that they were mean to him, he behaves the same way towards others."

"Do you really believe that?" she asked uncertainly, looking up at him.

Po smiled at her. "Of course I do."

"Shenmi? What are you doing here?"

The girl raised her head in surprise when she heard her big sister's voice. She got up quickly. "I was just thinking," she answered truthfully.

"About what?" Xia wanted to know.

Shenmi shrugged. "About one thing and then something else."

"About father?"

"Maybe, too."

"About what else?"

Shenmi wasn't sure whether she should answer what was really on her mind and ran her finger feather tips over the water surface.

"Xia?" she asked softly.

"Yes?"

"Did you... can you... can you imagine... you did... he was your father to begin with, wasn't he?"

Xia raised her eyebrows tensely. Did her little sister talk about Xiang again? Couldn't she talk about something else? And what was Shenmi trying to get at with this question? But she didn't get to answer it immediately, but was stopped again by Shenmi's words.

"Wasn't there ever a moment when he was nice to you?" Shenmi asked further.

Xia couldn't help but let out a dismissive snort. "No, he never was."

The girl looked at her hopefully. "Never?"

"Never, just as winter knows no summer. Never!"

Xia didn't want to talk about that past anymore and turned it to something more recent. "I heard him yelling around the village today. What was going on?"

Shenmi lowered her gaze. "I... I was just saying something nice to him... but he apparently misunderstood."

Xia's face darkened again. "That doesn't surprise me at all. Nothing positive can be expected from him. I thought mother specifically told you not to go to him anymore. Then why do you keep doing it?"

Nervously, Shenmi stroked the grass, as if afraid to voice her motivations. "I just wish he could be my friend."

Xia almost jumped at that sentence. "How did you come up with this absurd idea?! Didn't father tell you that he wanted to kill you and that he was a danger? You saw him. You said how he threatened you back then in Mendong City."

At this memory, Shenmi had to swallow.

"You're not going to hurt her, are you?" Liu asked.

Xiang snorted. Then a cold smile slipped over his beak. "Of course not." Shenmi looked at him uncertainly, so that the eyes of her and the blue peacock met. Xiang leaned down to her a little. "If I've broken your neck, you won't feel anything anyway."

Shenmi sobbed and buried her face in Liu's shirt. Liu in turn looked at Xiang punitively.

"That was completely unnecessary."

But Xiang just shrugged. "Why not? The fewer brats in the world, the better."

Shenmi shook her head as if she didn't want to believe Xiang's words.

"Yes, yes, he did," she admitted. "It's just... he looks like grandfather and... I'd like to know what our grandfather is like. He's supposed to have been a good peacock…" She sighed. Even if her father didn't like to talk about him, Shenmi didn't understand why someone shouldn't like one's father. But Shen had told her often enough that she wouldn't understand many things until she was grown up.

"But he's not your grandfather," Xia corrected her. "If so, he's just a random copy of it. To be honest, gray roan plumage would fit better for him."

Shenmi sighed. "You don't like him, do you?"

Xia knelt in front of her and looked at her almost relieved. "I'm just glad you didn't grow up with him."

The girl looked down again. "But couldn't we try something so that he becomes a little nicer to us."

Xia's eyes narrowed. "Xiang isn't worth that someone struggles with him like that."

"But Liu made it," Shenmi objected.

"Things between adults are always more complicated," Xia explained in a firm voice. "Sometimes even I don't understand them."

That didn't really convince Shenmi. Secretly, she could somehow understand Liu. When she thinks of how Xiang was so brutally harassed by his aunt back then. How she wanted to cut him open with the knife. Xiang's desperate muffled screams. Shenmi would never forget this picture.

"Maybe he just needs a little help," she finally said, which her big sister didn't understand.

"Believe me, he is and will always be a bad guy!" With these words she grabbed Shenmi's wing. "Come on now, mother is already waiting. And do me a favor and don't keep comparing him with our grandfather. I'm just glad that he isn't part of our family."

Shenmi didn't want to bother her sister with this topic any longer. She realized that Xia just didn't want to talk about it and asked her something else.

"Xia?"

The young peahen looked at her admonishingly. Fortunately, this time it wasn't about Xiang.

"But mum also has a papa, hasn't she?" Shenmi began hesitantly. "He's our grandfather, too, isn't he? Why didn't he ever come to visit us?"

Xia frowned. She had never thought about Yin-Yu's father. Maybe because her mother seldom talked about him. Did he know about the existence of his grandchildren? Or did he even know that Yin-Yu was no longer married to Xiang?

"I absolutely don't know, Shenmi," Xia admitted defeat. "Why don't you ask mother yourself?"

Shenmi craned her neck. "Yes, I'll do it! Oh, my ship!"

She fished her paper boat out of the water and together they both went back to the village. Xia was relieved that Shenmi had stopped talking about Xiang, but for Shenmi, the topic was far from off the table. She was determined not to give up. There had to be something to make Xiang friendlier.

"Well, and this is exactly where my family is now," Sheng finished his report.

He was walking down a side street with Liana. Both had only talked about their families all day. Liana had listened to him attentively and was very impressed.

"And you never knew of an uncle?" she broached the subject again.

"No, that's why we're a bit confused. I don't know how he is."

Liana looked at him thoughtfully. "Are you sure your father will find him?"

Sheng shook his head slowly. "He's already overpowered all sorts of other things, so I can imagine that he'll make it. But anyway. At least that's all I know about my family."

The goose girl smiled. "When you tell all that, it sounds a little different. So far we've only read what uncle Ping wrote to us. I could get jealous that your life is so exciting."

"But yours isn't uninteresting either," Sheng objected. "The incident of the raging bull that nearly chopped your furniture to bits just because the salt was missing."

Liana laughed. "Well, that doesn't happen every day either." She looked up at the sky. "By the way, shouldn't you be at the palace by now?"

Sheng twisted his beak. "Oh, I guess that'll be fine if I go upstairs to dinner."

The goose girl smiled. "I'm surprised that the Furious Five let you know that you can return to the Jade Palace later."

Sheng blushed again and scratched his head in embarrassment. "Yes, that's a mystery to me, too."

At that moment, Liana stopped walking. "Look. Isn't that your brother?"

Sheng followed her gaze. Not far away stood a group of ganders and pigs with musical instruments. Jian sat next to him and tugged a little on his pipa.

Sheng decided to walk over to him while Liana followed him unobtrusively.

"Jian, what are you doing here?" Sheng asked.

Jian stopped playing music for a moment. "They played a little," the green peacock boy with the white peacock spots said. "Then I offered to do play something, too."

"We're just rehearsing a few pieces of music for the kung fu festival," one of the pigs explained to the young lord. "So everything again at the beginning."

The musicians tuned their instruments again, one of them gave the countdown and on command they started a piece of music. At first, Jian sat apathetically. But once he had heard the beat, he joined in the background.

Peacock and goose girl listened for a while, then Sheng gave Liana a little nudge.

"How'd it go?"

Sheng waved his wing invitingly. Liana took a quick look around just to make sure there wasn't an audience. "Are you allowed to do something like that?" she asked as a precaution. "I mean, I'm not..."

"It doesn't matter what ethnic group you are," Sheng encouraged her. "That's okay."

Reluctantly, Liana stretched out her wing and Sheng swung her into the open street where he had unlimited space for his swinging feathers. At first, the goose girl hesitated to enter into his dance, but then she loosened up with every step and soon they were circling to the music.

At that moment, Xia and Shenmi came around the corner. Shenmi's eyes widened in surprise. "What is Sheng doing there?"

Xia shrugged. "Well, I guess that's called dancing."

The peahen crossed her wings and looked thoughtfully at the spinning couple. The two played a unit. They got along with each other well. For Xia, however, that was a tad too good.

Suddenly, Sheng let go of Liana, turned around again and opened his peacock fan. Xia's eyes widened in shock as her big brother continued to proudly display his long feathers. Liana looked fascinated at the many peacock spot eyes of the piebald peacock. Sheng laughed and turned around. But the goose girl walked around him, giggling, just to catch sight of his long feathers again. Sheng performed the show game a few times, then he grabbed her wings again and swung her to the music again.

The musicians had to smile at the sight of these prancing birds. When the music finally died down, Shenmi clapped her wings.

In surprise, Sheng and Liana looked up. Both quickly broke from their dance hug and looked a bit embarrassed. Sheng was a bit embarrassed and dragged Liana with him. "Come on, I'll take you to the restaurant."

Giggling, Liana let herself be dragged from the seat, knowing full well that Sheng didn't want any spectators any more than she did.

"That was funny, wasn't it?" Shenmi giggled. But her sister didn't even look at her. Xia had refrained from contributing to the applause the whole time and just stared after Sheng and Liana with a stony expression. Before, she had smiled about Sheng's "making-eyes" at Liana, but now she had lost all sense of humor in this act.

"Is anything wrong, Xia?" Shenmi asked in confusion.

But instead of answering, Xia pushed the girl forward. "Go home now. I'll be right there."

Shenmi watched in amazement as Xia hurried down the street after them.

"Maybe we'll see each other tomorrow," Sheng suggested hopefully.

Liana smiled. "Well, even if you don't, you'll come to the festival, won't you?"

Sheng lifted his head. "I have to be there. I have attendance requirements. After all, I'm one of the guests of honor."

The goose girl shook her head. "At least as soon as the Dragon Warrior shows up there at some point. Otherwise, Shifu will definitely get really angry."

Sheng twisted his beak. "Well then, I hope he doesn't take his anger out on us."

Both laughed. But then they fell into a helpless silence until Sheng finally managed to come up with a redeeming sentence. "Well, see you then."

He took a few steps back and waved at her. Liana waved back until Sheng forced himself to turn and walk up the road to the edge of the village.

Neither of them noticed the pair of eyes that had been watching them for quite a long time. Zedong let out an angry snort as Sheng said goodbye to Liana. He had spent the whole day with her, although he should have gone to the palace, too. Instead, he even got permission to stay with her. But he seemed to have completely forgotten his brother.

Zedong clenched his feather fists angrily.

"That silly old goose!" he cursed. The peacock boy furiously kicked away a stone that flew through the air with such great force and rattled straight through a window. The peacock boy ran away in fright.

At that moment, Sheng wouldn't have cared if the world had ended. As if on clouds, he strolled through the dark alleys of the village. As soon as he got to the long stairway that led up the hill to the palace, he simply lay down on a large stone. He sighed and looked up at the sky, putting one foot on his knee and rocking up and down. He only became aware of his surroundings again when he heard a voice next to him.

"Sheng?" In surprise, he lifted his head and looked into the face of his sister, who looked at him worried. "I thought you had to go back to the Jade Palace.""

But Sheng shrugged and lay down again. "I can do that later. The Jade Palace isn't running away from me."

There was a pause before Xia cleared her throat. "Sheng? Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Anytime, sis."

"I was watching you. How you danced with Liana."

"So what?"

"You opened your peacock fan in front of her and played for her attention."

"So what?"

"Sheng! You courted!"

"So what? That's not a crime."

"It means you like her."

"So what?"

"In fact, you like her very deep."

"So what?"

"And she was always looking at you."

"So what?"

"That means she likes you, too."

A wistful smile crossed Sheng's beak. "How nice you say that. Keep talking."

"Are you planning to marry her?"

Sheng winced. "Don't talk about 'maybe'. I'm just glad that it's so nice right now. But who knows."

Xia raised her eyebrows. "And what if yes?"

Sheng sighed. "Beautiful dreams of the future."

"Sheng! Are you even listening to me?"

"Like never again in my whole life."

"Sheng! If… if you should marry her… then you will automatically be related to her family."

"So what? That's normal."

"Liana is Pong's daughter."

"So what?"

"And Pong is Mr. Ping's brother."

"So what?"

"And Mr. Ping is Po's foster father."

"So what? What's wrong having a panda in a bird family?"

Xia shook her head wistfully. "Sheng! With this marriage, our family will also become related to them."

"It's normal for two families to unite when they get married."

Xia nervously rubbed her wings together. "And what about Shen?"

"He will come into the family unity, too. I'm sure they'll take him well. So Mr. Ping does it already."

"Do you actually understand what I mean by that?"

This time, Sheng just frowned at his sister. Xia let out a deep sigh before finally speaking it out. "Can you imagine that? Lord Shen...related...to the Dragon Warrior?"

At that moment, Sheng realized what she was getting at and sat up, sobered.

Yin-Yu was a bit surprised to see only Shenmi running up the stairs that led to the house's guest apartment.

"Where's your sister?" she asked in surprise.

"Mummy? What about your dad?" Shenmi blurted out when she finally reached her mother in the corridor. "Couldn't he come and see us?"

Yin-Yu was dumbfounded when her little daughter confronted her about it.

"How? What makes you think of that now?"

"If we'll never see Shen's father, then what about your father?" Shenmi bluntly persisted, looking at her mother expectantly. But Yin-Yu was stunned and even had to lean against the wall for a moment.

"Well, he... He's..."

"Isn't he nice?" Shenmi's heart sank. "Or is he no longer alive? Why don't you ever talk about him?"

Yin-Yu felt her wings begin to tremble, but she pulled herself together at the last second and managed to stand up straight again. "You know, I think we should talk about this later," she said calmly. "One thing at a time. You should think about your father first. After all, if he finds his brother, you will have an uncle."

Shenmi's face lit up. "Yes, then I have an uncle!"

Happily, the girl ran to the nearest window and looked out expectantly, as if she might see her father outside at any moment.

"I hope he comes soon," she murmured longingly.

Her mother looked down at the white peacock child with a guilty conscience. She just hoped she hadn't stirred up any hasty anticipation in her daughter. It wasn't even sure whether Shen's brother was okay at all. But Yin-Yu preferred talking about him instead of her own father and took it all with a wry smile.

If you want, you can read the flashback scene from Shen's point of view for the goat's flashback again in Chapter 25 of "The Last Honor".