Soul Calibur: On TV?
Remember MTV's "Pimp My Ride"? It's like that instead they make houses look better instead of cars. And I don't own it, before you start whining. That's this chapter, basically.
Disclaimer: Do not own SC. Was that clear enough?
(Seung Mina comes in with Hwang)
Seung Mina: Hi, and welcome to "Pimp My House" Where we decorate your crib!
Hwang: Yo, this is my lovely assistant, Mina
Mina: So...lets see who gets their pad decorated today!
LATER
(Mina and Hwang walk to the porch of a scatty looking house. They knock on the door and Zasalamel answers)
Zasalamel: (Like an excited schoolgirl) OMG! OMG! I'm sooooo Happy!
Hwang: So, lets have a look around.
Zasalamel: (Still excited) Ok! Come in, Come in!
(Mina and Hwang walk in to find the wallpaper ripped, with Zasalamel's dirty scythe on the floor making the worn carpet dirty, and Maxi snoring on the sofa with Mitsurugi, Talim, Yunsung and Kilik)
Hwang: (Mumbling) What the-
Zasalamel: (Embaressed) ...um...that was my...gang bang...last night...They're all crashing here.
Hwang: Jeez...
(Mina is disgusted by that, and pukes)
Mina: oh, gawd I'm so sorry!
Hwang: Not like it could've made it any worse...
Zasalamel: So...shall we go to another room now?
Hwang: Onward.
(They walk into the kitchen to find worms and blood on the walls, with custard on the cooker, and the floor crawling with roaches)
Mina: Jeez...did you try to make Astroroth's worm pie?
Zasalamel: (Smiling sweetly) Why yes, I did! Thanks for noticing. I also added Custard!
Mina: So I see.
Hwang: (Mumbling) I swear he's gay. Or a woman. Or both.
(Maxi awakes and bursts into the room naked)
Maxi: Good morning Sunshine!
Maxi: (Noticing the visitors and talking in a sultry voice) Heeellllllloooooo. So, you 2 doing anything tonight?
Mina: Maxi? WTF
Maxi: Jeez...Its Seung Mina! Don't I work with you, Tira, Kilik, Talim, Setsuka, etc?
Mina: Yeah you do! I'm very disapointed in you!(Everybody suddenly realises Maxi is still drunk from last night)
Maxi: Ah, Shut up! You Talk too Much!
(Maxi starts ripping Mina's clothes off)
Mina: Get off me!
Maxi: ooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh! Someone's cranky!
(Maxi starts trying to bone Hwang and succedes, right there in front of the camera)
Hwang: Ahhhh yeah...Oh...Maxi...Yeah...Ohh...Ooh...Don't stop
(Mina pukes again and runs out. Zasalamel, and the now awakened Mitsurugi, Talim and Kilik joins Maxi and Hwang. The cameraman, who is Siegfried, Joins them also. The camera is still rolling and they manage to tape it all.)
Talim: ...uh...ooh...Wahhhhhh! Calm down Talim...okay
Zasalamel: Yeah...come on Talim...just suck it...it won't hurt...
Talim: ...muuuuftttt...mmmmmm Slurp
Siegfried: Maxi...oh...yeah...uh...Maxi...ah yeah, shove it in there...
Mitsurugi: uh...uh...uh...uh
Maxi: oh...jeez...uh...uh...Yeah...oh...Mitsurugi
Talim: ...oh god...keep licking...yeah!...ooh
(Later, the camera is still rolling, and they take the video out and watch it.)
Maxi: Jeez...is my ass really that big?
Talim: Trust me...I've seen enough of it.
(A/N: Sorry this chap's short. I promise the next one will be longer.)