Disclaimer: I don't own the characters, I do not own the places. I don't own anything related to FFVIII, all I own is the plot.
- Chapter twelve: Truth -
She stared at him speachlessly.
"Rinoa, what is this all about." He asked again.
"I-"
"It's a threat, I can see that. But it doesn't make any sense. You're hurting someone with your actions? What 'actions' Rinoa!"
She wanted to look away or turn around so she wouldn't have to face him. But it would only make answering his questions worse. She realised that she couldn't continue keeping Squall in the dark. She looked down for a moment and then forced herself to look up.
"Squall...I..."
The fact that he was staring at her made it even harder on her. She tried to discover what kind of look he had in his eyes but she couldn't say if it was anger, curiosity or fear.
"I need to tell you something."
"You know who's been sending these?"
"No...Squall, please." She put her trembling fingers to his lips. "I need to say something, but I can't do it if you talk to me. You need to let me speak for a few minutes...without interrupting me, okay?"
Squall sat down on the bed again and looked at the wall so he wouldn't have to see her face.
"I think I know where this is going..." he muttered in a low voice.
She paced through the room for a few moments, before she realised what he was thinking.
"No, no...it's not what you think, I'm...well, not...not completely. I love you, Squall. I need you to realise that I do still love you with all my heart. But...I can't be dishonest anymore and say that you're the only one..."
She saw his face stiffen. But he kept his silence.
"I felt...alone. And that was because of your job-"
"You always said you understood! You always- I tried to be there for you, do things for you! Always!"
"Squall, I know! And it hurts me so much that his has happened. It was never supposed to be this way because you and I really do love each other, don't we. But somehow...in my loneliness...I must've reached out for somene else..."
He stood up and ran his hand through his hair. She could see that he was trying to keep his face as emotionless as he could, but the trembling muscles betrayed him and she knew he was about to cry. A sharp jab struck her heart, seeing him like this.
"Squall...please look at me..."
He turned around to face her and immediately she wished she hadn't asked him to. He had tears in his eyes and she saw he was desperately trying to keep his lip steady. Only now did she realise exactly how much she had hurt him.
She looked down and felt her own eyes start to water too. She bit her lip to stop the tears from flowing. All she wanted to do now was to step forward and clasp him in her arms, but she didn't dare close the space between them. His burning eyes forced her to look up again, to face his pain.
"I never wanted this..." she whispered in a hoarse voice.
"I'm sure you didn't!" he snapped.
She could hear the tears breaking his voice.
"It's true...I only ever wanted to love you and I do love you!"
"But I'm not enough for you? But you need more than me? Then why don't you go ahead and kick me out so Irvine can come over! Go on!"
Rinoa frowned confused.
"...Eh...?"
Irvine? She was sure she hadn't mentioned him yet. But when she looked at Squall she saw anger burn behind his watery eyes.
"Don't think I'm stupid, Rinoa! I have eyes, you know! Did you honestly think I hadn't noticed the way the two of you act?"
"Then why didn't you..." she whispered.
"Figure that out yourself! But I'll give you a hint. Perhaps I didn't want to see or believe it because I still loved you"! he bellowed.
And before Rinoa could say anything, he had stormed out the door, smashing it shut with a loud bang. Rinoa felt her knees buckle and before she realised she was falling, she had already hit the floor.
She had never felt this cold before. She couldn't believe that she had finally said those things to Squall...or that he had known all this time. There was nothing she wanted more at the moment than to be cradled in his arms, but he would never hold her like that again.
Never like the way he had held her while on the Ragnarok. He would never risk his life for her the way he had done when she had been in space all alone, or fight for her the way he had done when Adel...
He had fought for her all those times, he had shown he loved her in so many ways and this was how she had repaid him.
She shivered on the linolium floor and finally she could cry, although no tears were left to fall down from her eyes. When the door opened with a soft creak, she raised her head and wiped her cheeks dry.
"Squall?" she asked hopefully.
But it was Quistis who shook her head.
"No, it's me. Rinoa...I'm so sorry."
Sorry? For what? Rinoa wondered. Squall couldn't have told everyone already could he? The mere thought almost made her sink to her knees again.
"You need to come with me. I can't tell you-"
"Quisty, what's this about?" Rinoa asked, swallowing away her broken voice.
"It's...about Angelo..."
She knew this was supposed to make her feel at ease, knowing that the break-up was still unknown to the others. But the way Quistis was talking to her scared her.
"What do you mean? What about Angelo?"
Quistis avoided Rinoa's eyes. "I can't say it...it's...horrible..."
Rinoa's breath got stuck in her throat. She followed Quistis towards the infirmary, not knowing what to expect, not understanding why they were headed there.
The doctor was seated behind her desk, waiting for them to arrive. Once they entered she stood up quickly.
"Miss Heartily...are you...sure you want to see this?"
Rinoa nodded vaguely. "I want to see Angelo...Where is he, is he okay?"
Quistis stepped back with her hand pressed to her mouth, staying behind while Rinoa followed Kadowaki. Rinoa looked at her friend over her shoulder. Then Kadowaki opened the door ahead by pressing the keybutton on the wall next to it and waited outside, allowing Rinoa to step inside.
Rinoa walked in slowly, searching the floor with her eyes to see if Angelo was trotting around somewhere. But a nasty, putrid smell lured her attention to the bed. The mattress on the bed had been covered with a green plastic sheet and on top of that was Angelo.
At least, that was what her eyes told her. But when she looked closer she saw that Angelo was dead.
His body had been mutilated. His stomach had been cut open with a knife or something like it, and his blood was already dripping from the sheet to the floor.
Rinoa doubled back out the door and fell against Quistis who had just wanted to enter the room herself. Rinoa wanted to speak, but she couldn't and looked at Quistis instead, trying to find answers there.
Quistis shook her head at Kadowaki and the doctor closed the door again. Quistis guided Rinoa to a chair and then sat down herself, fiddling with the zipper of her shirt to occupy herself while waiting for Kadowaki to speak.
"Someone found him in the Secret Area. And...this was found next to him."
Kadowaki slid a slip of paper over the desk and Rinoa took it hesitantly. She looked at Kadowaki before unfolding it, but Kadowaki was staring at her desk and not at her.
'I told you before that I had given you a final warning. Your dog had to suffer this fate so I could get through to you...'
Rinoa whimpered and let the note fall to the floor.
"Perhaps she should be taken to her dormitory..." Quistis whispered.
But the doctor shook her head. "No. I want to examine her first. I don't want her to lapse into a shock without us knowing."
Quistis nodded faintly and got to her feet. "Very well...I'll leave her in your hands, doctor. Please...could you take care of Angelo too? I'll go and see Squall. He needs to be informed."
She bent down and slid the note into her pocket. She looked at the pale Rinoa helplessly for a moment and then turned around to leave. Quistis tried to force the image of the mutilated dog from her mind as she stepped aboard the elevator but she found it difficult.
Angelo had helped them so many times in battle and she also knew how much Rinoa had loved him. She shook her head violently and tapped the floor with her foot impatiently. When the elevator doors opened again she burst through them.
She brushed past Xu's desk, muttering an excuse and didn't wait for her aproval to enter Cid's office. She knew Cid would be talking to Squall right now and this concerned them both.
"Sir, Squall." She greeted curtly as she marched into the office. "I know I shoulnd't barge in like this but I've got a very serious incident on my hands and-"
She stopped herself talking as it hit her that this wasn't he right way to tell them. This concerned a friend of theirs and not someone they didn't know. Squall needed to be told directly but tactfully and not with all this blah blah around it. She turned to face him.
"Squall...it's about Rinoa."
She had expected him to look worried or curious, but instead he looked uninterested.
"Squall, this is serious..."
"If she's having a tantrum then don't expect me to help. I don't want anything to do with her anymore."
Quistis was taken aback by this. "What? But...but she's your girlfriend!"
"Not anymore, she isn't.! And I don't want to hear about her petty problems. Can't you see I'm trying to my job here?" he snapped.
Quistis slammed the note down on the desk. "This is you job, Squall! Do you honestly think I'd come here if this wasn't serious?"
"I don't know, you tell me!" he bellowed.
His face began to look red and he rose from his chair to face Quistis. Now her face coloured red too.
"If you'd just listen to me you'd know what this is about! Angelo was murdered!"
Immediately she turned around and raised her hand to her head. This wasn't the way she had planned to tell him. And all this yelling wasn't doing any of them good..
'And...' she thought. 'What is this about Rinoa and Squall breaking up?'
That couldn't be true, could it? Then again, it would explain his short temper. Squall sank back into the chair with a strange frown on his face.
"...Murdered?" he asked hoarsley.
She turned around again and nodded. "Yes...it's horrible...I've seen the it..."
Squall looked at the note and reached for it tentively.
"We found that next to him." She explained.
"I told you before that I had given you a final warning. Your dog had to suffer this fate so I could get through to you. If you stop hurting those around you then you will be safe. If you don't then perhaps you will suffer the same fate not too long from now." He read slowly.
He looked up at Quistis' face, that seemed so pale now, in contrast to the shade of red it had been seconds ago.
"This...was found with Angelo?"
Quistis nodded.
He looked at Cid. "Sir...this is a threat...and actual threat on someone's life in my Garden!"
Cid, who had been silent up till now, folded his hands together and leaned his elbows on his desk. "Well...you know what you must do, Commander. It's your job to act on this."
Squall slid the note back onto the desk. "I know. But...I don't think I should handle this case...It being about Rinoa and all..."
He looked at Quistis hopefully, but she shook her head.
"No, Squall. Not me. Not on my own. If you want I will help you, I'll talk to Rinoa. But it's you who needs to take charge."
He nodded slowly and picked up the note again.
"If you don't then perhaps you will suffer the same fate not too long from now." He read again. "This guy is serious...Are you sure Angelo is-"
"Yes!" she snapped.
"Sorry...I believe you...First things first. I want to see Angelo. I want to know what kind of sick person we're dealing with. And Rinoa needs protection. Where is she now?"
"At the infirmary. Kadowaki wanted to examine her."
"What! You left her without protection after someone threatened her?" he shouted exasperated.
Quistis paled at his outburst.
"...S- sorry...I'm just...worried about her." He whispered.
"But I thought-"
"Quistis, that Rinoa and I aren't...well, that doesn't mean that I simply stopped caring. I still love her but I can't face her right now. Feelings don't just disapear."
He stood up and walked towards the door.
"I'll go and see if I can find someone to stand guard at her door, just to be on the safe side."
"Wait." Quistis said quickly. "I'll come with you."
She hurried out the door and pressed the button for the elevator. When the doors slid open and they went inside, Quistis felt a question burning in her mind. She waited for the elevator doors to close so Xu wouldn't hear her.
"Squall...can I ask you...what happened? Between you and her?"
He looked at the doors emotionlessly. "...You can ask...but if you don't mind, I'd rather not say just now. But thank you far asking."
Quistis smiled at him and squeezed his hand encouragingly. "That's okay. If you change your mind you can always talk to me."
He smiled at her thankfully. "Thanks, Quistis."