A/N: Thank you all so much! I love hearing what you think and I'm so glad you're all enjoying this. I hope you like this chapter! Please let me know what you think.

Chapter 45

I couldn't sleep. There was something lingering in the back of my mind. I couldn't put it in words, but I couldn't sleep, couldn't even consider lying in bed. Every time I tried, I found myself getting up. I didn't want to be comfortable. I didn't want…I didn't know what I wanted but I found myself sitting again on the front porch in the dark, coffee in hand with Buster at my side.

High school was over and I was officially destroying Tammy's dreams. Even if no one else realized it. I did. I knew Debbie implied that I was here to stay, that Tammy was where she was meant to be. Despite not having any control over my…arrival, I still couldn't stop thinking about her. Was she really okay? Was she in my body back home?

I stared out at the dark and empty street. It was so quiet here.

"Tammy?"

"Jesus Christ!" I jumped out of my skin at the voice behind me, spilling coffee everywhere as I turned to see Sam standing in the doorway, looking confused.

"What are you doing out here?"

"I couldn't sleep," I said, putting the cup down and trying to shake the remains off my hands. Thank god it had gone cold. "I didn't want to wake anyone."

He frowned slightly before he moved forward and sat down next to me. He pulled his robe tighter around him. We sat in silence for a few moments. "Your mom told me you're not going to Nashville. That what's keeping you up?"

"No," I said before realizing he was right in a way. "Yes." I sighed and leaned forward, resting my elbow on my knee and putting my chin in my hand. "I know it's the right thing but I don't know…I'm sad too."

"I know you've had your heart set on Nashville," he said after a moment. "You've talked nonstop about it since you started high school and it's great. We've always supported you but…I think you're making a smart decision."

I looked over at him, curious as to his reasoning.

"A lot has changed this year and it's clear that you've grown up a lot, it seems like it happened without us even noticing." I snorted at that because the truth was wilder than he knew. He gave me a look and I mimed zipping my mouth shut. "It's a big responsibility to go out into the world. It was one thing to send you to university, but Nashville…it scared me. I'm glad you're not leaving, not yet. And that you're not too old to spend time with your old man," he nudged me slightly. I felt a rush of affection for Sam. He was a great father and I briefly wondered why they never had any more kids. They certainly seemed to love Tammy.

I leaned into his side, resting my head on his shoulder. "Of course not," I said softly. "I'm never too old for that."

He kissed the top of my head. "Good. But I am too old to sit out here all night. Come inside. Sun's gonna rise soon. I'll make more coffee."

"I'll be in in a minute," I said. "Just going to watch the sunrise."

"Okay." He looked over at the dog on the grass. "You going to stay with her?" Buster waddled over and sat down on my feet. Sam smiled. "Good boy." He looked back at me. "Don't be too long. Your mother will kill me if you catch a cold and I knew you were out here."

I laughed. "I won't. Especially if there's coffee."

He nodded and headed inside.

Hopper crossed his arms over his chest.

"I don't like it."

"I know," I said. "But you know I'm right. We have to start now."

Hopper let out a breath from his nose. He looked away and ran a hand over his face. "It's not safe."

"She'll be safer with more people aware of her than hidden from the world. It won't be as easy to take her away if an entire town knows her."

"Kate…"

"She needs people her own age, Hop. You know that. It can't just be me, Max and Mike. Not if you want her to have a well-rounded education. A well-rounded life."

"Yeah? How you going to explain her?"

"I don't know," I shrugged. "Something like homeschool, but that wouldn't explain her lack of social skills…maybe a cult?"

"What?"

"Yeah, I mean, cults aren't uncommon. Especially after the 70s, right? Growing up in one would explain any problems she has with socialization. Any weird things that she says, like having a tattoo, can be waved away on it."

He seemed to actually think about it. "And her mother? Why would she be with me?"

"I don't know, a one-night stand?" He gave me a look and I shrugged. "What? You're going to try to tell me you never hooked up with a woman for one night?"

"Well…"

"So say she tracked you down or that it was broken up by the feds. That's a thing, right?"

He made a face, eyebrows raised. "That could work. She has a mom though. She's not…she's not well."

"So they got her out and since her mom couldn't take care of her, they contacted you. Simple as that."

"Ain't that simple."

"Come on," I drawled. "It's the 80's. Not like everything is computerized. We can start small. Just let her come to my house, anywhere away from the middle of nowhere."

"I can't let her get hurt, Kate. It's too soon."

"For her? Or you?"

He looked stunned at that and before he could argue, I continued. "She needs to have more trustworthy people she can go to for help. More places she can feel safe. Besides, being a cop is dangerous even when there's not monsters running around. A traffic stop can get you killed. Have you planned for El if anything happens to you?"

"Well, I…I don't know, maybe Joyce?"

"Joyce who has two kids of her own and is struggling? She only has her income and I'm not slamming her for it. It's admirable, but with the amount she works, even with Will as a friend, is that enough for El? For what she needs?"

He pulled out a cigarette and lit it. I didn't complain. I had just hounded him for information, to get El out more so that she could actually start experiencing life. He seemed like he was reeling from it and I wondered if anyone besides El had argued with him about her being stuck in that cabin.

"You don't pull punches, do you kid?"

"Not when it counts."

"The government dude…he told me we had to lie low."

"And you have, but she's a kid, Hopper. She needs to get out and be one. You keeping her locked up in a cabin isn't that much better than wherever she was locked up before. Let her live." He frowned at that and I wondered if he really remembered what it was like to be a teenager. It was even worse being a teen girl. She was already going to have a hard time. We didn't need to make it harder. "You believe Hawkins is a good town, right? So let them be good to El too."

"Ain't gonna be easy."

"Nothing worth doing is."

He took a deep breath and I looked away, glancing at the town around us. People were walking without a care despite some of the stores putting up sales signs. Some were already closed. The mall hadn't been open long but I was right about what it was going to do to the town. Small businesses were getting pushed out. It was a sad sight.

"Come on," he said. "We stay out here any longer and Flo's going to have my ass. Claim I'm corrupting you or something."

"Don't worry, I'll tell her I spent the entire time lecturing you on smoking and the effects on your health. She might give me a raise if I tell her you started using the trick I gave you."

"Waste of tobacco," he muttered. "I'll think about what you said."

"Good. That's all I ask."

Flo hadn't exactly given me more hours during the summer. At least not enough to fill my days. There wasn't nearly enough to do in this town, but it was on Deanna's suggestion that I found myself at the community pool. They had specific times and space for doing laps, which was a great way to workout without being forced to run in the heat. I had yet to learn to enjoy jogging in any form I took, despite the way the martial arts teacher encouraged it each class. Thankfully, I was also able to read while I was there even if it involved slathering myself in sunscreen. Tammy was almost as ridiculously pale as I was.

"Didn't expect to see you here, sugar lips." I looked up to see Billy standing over me. "You come to see me?"

I looked him over. "Are you a lifeguard?"

He grinned. "You in need of saving?"

"Not if I can help it." I nodded towards the pool. "Shouldn't you be working?"

"Yeah," he looked around before focusing back on me. "You sticking around? Got something I want to talk to you about."

That was interesting. "Sure. As long as I don't get sunstroke we'll be good."

"Stay in the shade and hydrate. You'll be fine."

"Well look at you being all professional," I grinned at him. "Now go make sure no one drowns."

He lowered his sunglasses and winked at me. "Whatever you say, peaches." He left me there to bask in the sun. I felt eyes on me and looked around until I caught sight of the group of moms looking between Billy and me. That was creepy. I turned back to my book.

"Hey, Kate?"

I looked up to see someone I didn't recognize standing there. She was wearing one of those red lifeguard swimsuits. "Yeah?"

"Hi, it's Heather," she introduced herself. "Can I sit?" She motioned to the chair next to me.

"Sure," I said, curious about who she was and what she wanted. "What's up?"

"You here to see Billy?"

"Nope, just came to tan and waste time."

"That's fun!" I looked over at her, seeing her smile. She was enthusiastic if nothing else. "You and Billy are friends though, right?"

"Yeah. Pretty sure."

"You're like…the only one."

"He takes some getting used to," I said.

"Yeah," she smiled. "I didn't think you'd be here though. I mean, like…I thought you'd be getting ready for school?" She winced. "Sorry. I didn't mean it like that."

I laughed slightly, trying to get her to relax. "Don't worry. I'm not going to university in September. I'll be working and saving up. What about you?"

"Oh. I mean, I got another year. I've been lifeguarding since I passed the course."

"Oh really? That's awesome. You must be a really strong swimmer! Plus the whole knowing CPR which is always a good thing, lifeguard or not."

Heather looked a little surprised before she grinned. "Yeah, I mean, for sure. I guess I never thought of it that way."

"Well, they wouldn't have hired you right off the bat if you didn't have the skills for it, right? That's impressive. How old were you?"

"Fifteen?"

"Wow." I gave her a smile. "I'm a decent swimmer but I don't think I could do that. You know…something like this looks great on college applications too. Once you get there."

"Yeah," she nodded. "That's my goal. Anything to help, right?"

"For sure."

"Anyway, I'll let you get back to reading. I just wanted to…I don't know, come say hi? I saw you a lot in school and I thought maybe you and Billy were together–"

I started laughing. I couldn't help it. I waved her off. "God no, I mean, no offence to Billy but we're just friends."

Heather grinned and stood up. "Alright. Well, thanks for being so nice. I'll talk to you later? Love the suit by the way!" She walked away as I called out a thanks.

I was wearing a bikini for the first time. I could never manage it back home, mainly because of the creeps who assumed it was free clearance to stare or worse and because I always felt like I was going to fall out of it. Tammy didn't have that problem. In fact, I was able to swim without worrying too much, aside from how far up the bottoms would attempt to crawl up my ass. Eighties style left a lot to be desired in some areas including how high they cut some of their swim bottoms and underwear.

"Holy shit, Queenie. Get the fuck out of the sun."

"What?"

"Unless you're trying to give a lobster a run for its money, move." Billy dragged my chair with me on it further back towards the fence. There wasn't much shade though.

"Shit, is it that bad? It doesn't feel bad."

"It will," he said. "Come on, we should get you out of the sun before you start crisping."

"Ha ha," I stood up and grabbed my bag and towel.

Billy took the towel from me and wrapped it over my shoulders. "Come on." I grabbed the towel and held it before following him as he led me away from the pool and inside.

"Is someone watching the pool?" I asked, looking back.

"James and Heather have got it. Sit."

I rolled my eyes but sat down on the chair he motioned to as we got into an office. He left the door open thankfully.

"Come on, let me see how bad it is." I moved the towel and heard him hiss.

"Oh dear," I turned at the sound of a new voice. Standing in the doorway was one of the mothers I had seen earlier. "That looks bad. Here," she moved forward. "I brought you some aloe I had. I hope you don't mind. I couldn't help but notice your legs when you two walked by."

I glanced down. My legs were red and I knew as soon as I scratched or touched them it was going to hurt like a bitch. "Shit." I looked back at the woman. "Thanks. I appreciate that. Looks like I'm going to need it."

"Of course," she gave a smile. "I'm Karen Wheeler, Nancy and Mike's mom? You babysit for the Sinclair's and Henderson's, right?"

"My reputation precedes me," I said. "Sorry about swearing."

"Nothing I haven't heard, or said," Karen said, waving it off with her hand. She smiled at both of us. "It's Tammy, right?"

"Kate," Billy interjected. "She goes by Kate."

"Oh! I'm sorry."

"It's fine, don't worry," I gave her a smile.

"We have some snacks and drinks," she offered. "If you need any, to help get you feeling better. I mean, after the aloe. And if you need a lift home, I'd be happy to drive you. If Billy hasn't already offered."

"I'll be alright, but thank you."

"Yeah, thank you Mrs. Wheeler," Billy said, turning towards her slightly. He gave her one of his apparently sultry types of smile. "Don't know what we'd do without you."

I nudged him, trying to break the creepiness of the scene unfolding before me."Watch yourself," I muttered. He grinned down at me.

"Well," Mrs. Wheeler cleared her throat and I thought I spotted a blush. Ew. "It's there if you need it. Just come on by."

"Will do, thank you." I took the bottle from her and started with my legs first while Billy was distracted with the hot, albeit nice, mom. I wasn't even going to try to figure that out but his attraction to me was beginning to make a little more sense. Still, she was a married woman and he just graduated from high school.

"Need help?" I heard Billy ask as he leaned on the desk next to me.

"Not with this part, thanks." He fell silent and I tried to ignore the fact that I knew he was watching me as I finished covering my arms.

"What's with the bruises?" he asked.

"What?"

"You got faded ones on your arms and a big one on your back shoulder. Someone hurt you?"

"Oh, no," I said, frowning slightly. "I take karate classes. Tend to get a bit beat up in them."

"Yeah?" I felt him poke my shoulder and couldn't stop the hiss as I flinched away. "Because it looks like fingers."

"I'm fine," I said. "You have to grab someone in order to flip them. Sometimes it's intense but it's fine."

"Don't bullshit me."

"I'm not," I stressed. "I promise." I turned to look at him and gave him a soft smile. I understood where the concern was coming from. Especially with the look on his face. "What's up? You wanted to talk?" I asked. "Can you get my back for me?" I figured giving him something to do might make it easier. Billy didn't strike me as a person who was used to being open in any sort of way. It took practice.

He looked a little surprised but grinned and I rolled my eyes and made a mental note to remind him that I still wasn't going to sleep with him. He took the bottle though and I turned to give him more access. I couldn't help but flinch slightly as the cool feeling of the aloe hit my back. Billy paused and his movements slowed, but in a weird sort of carefulness. Like he was trying to make sure I knew he wasn't going to push. It took a moment before he started talking.

"I went to the kid's house. His sister has a mouth on her."

I gave a small laugh, realizing who he was talking about. "Yeah, she does. Good kid though."

"The dad answered the door. I told him why I was there and I…thought I was going to shit myself with the look he gave which was nothing when the mom heard what I did. The kid didn't even want to be there and I didn't blame him. I didn't want to be there."

"But you were."

"Yeah. I told them what I did, that I wanted to apologize. You know that little shit asked if it was because of you?"

"Don't call him that," I said out of reflex. "What'd you say?"

"I didn't want to be my father." He paused in his movements. "The kid–Lucas," he adjusted, "said he accepted as long as I leave him and his friends alone. His parents though…they wanted to talk."

I turned to look at him. He was staring towards me but I didn't think he actually saw me. It looked like he was lost in thought. "How'd that go?"

His eyes snapped to mine. "How do you think? Fucking weird."

I nodded. "Yeah, that makes sense. How do you feel about it though?"

He seemed to consider it. "Like I need a smoke just thinking about it."

"Well, for what it's worth," I reached over and touched his arm, drawing his focus back on me. "You did the right thing. I'm proud of you. Not a lot of people would admit they fucked up and actually try to fix it."

"Yeah, well, someone told me they expected better of their friends. So, shit, if we're friends, I gotta be worth it, right?"

"You already were. But I do think this is a step in a better direction than what you were heading to."

"Always got something to say, don't you, Queenie?"

"You know it."

[tbc]