Chapter 12
A/N: Dude, I'm SO sorry it took me this long to post another chapter. I had it written but was having serious doubts about its inclusion in the story because it was sorta going in a direction I wasn't sure I wanted to go. But I have a segue all planned, so I think it'll be okay. So please forgive my lack of dedication. I promise to do better with the next chapter. There are just a couple more to go. Whee!
Disclaimer: If there's something worth owning, it's not owned by me – up to and including characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.
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"Hey, Harris. You gonna actually eat that sandwich, or are you waiting for it to be absorbed through your skin?"
"Huh?" Xander said, shaking his head slightly. "Uh, sorry, Matt. Just thinking."
"I bet you are," his coworker answered, chuckling. "Quite a shock you got the other day. How you doin' with it?"
"Who, me? I'm great. It's…great."
Matt grinned. "Dude, you're still in the clouds. Man, I remember when my wife told me she was pregnant with our first. I could hardly string two syllables together for a week. 'Course, I guess it's a little different for you, since you're not exactly together." He grimaced slightly. "But, hey, that's none of my business."
"Nah, it's okay," Xander replied. "It's not without complication. I don't know how we're gonna end up."
"It's love, though." It was a statement, not a question.
"That transparent, huh?" Xander laughed hollowly.
"You have a…quality, yeah," Matt answered. "Look, I'm not one for giving advice, and you can feel free to leave it where it lies…"
"No, please. I'll take whatever you've got."
"Just make sure it's her you love, and not only the baby. 'Cause a baby? That's always gonna be your kid, ya know? That feeling you've got in the pit of your stomach—that excitement and pride—that's never going away. But if you lead the mother on and your heart's not really in it, she's gonna know. She'll know, and she'll resent you for it. Don't put her through that, if you're not really sure." He saw the gloom in Xander's eyes and felt sorry for his warning. "Hey, forget I said anything."
Xander looked at him, a pained expression on his face. "It's okay, Matt. You're right. I'd rather die than do that to Willow."
Matt gave a slow whistle through his teeth. "If that's the case, you got nothing to worry about."
Xander looked at him, shocked. "You just—did you just put me through some kind of…test?" At Matt's feigned innocence, he huffed, "That's cold, man."
"Hey, I've been where you are. Did I forget to tell you my wife and I weren't exactly married when she got pregnant?"
Xander raised his eyebrows.
"Don't look so shocked. I'm not your old man, Harris. I've only been married nine years. What I'm trying to say is, yeah, my head got a pretty good spin when Missy told me we were having a kid. But it was the best shock of my life. Woke me right up. And I've never been sorry." He clapped Xander on the back and got up. "Now let's get back to work. This house isn't gonna build itself."
"Yeah, be right there," Xander replied, shaking his head. This was going to be a long day. A very long day.
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"Transference," Willow said emphatically.
"Will, you're crazy," Buffy replied. "And also? I don't know what that means."
"It means he's so in love with the baby that he's made himself believe he loves me, too. He associates me with the baby—which, kinda hard not to do right now—so he thinks he loves me, but he doesn't."
"He doesn't," Buffy repeated, unconvinced.
"Right."
"And you're upset about that."
"Well, yeah," Willow said righteously.
"Because…" Buffy prompted.
"Because I—oh, no you don't. It's perfectly natural for me to want the father of my baby to love me for myself and not for…for the love of God, Buffy, what's wrong with me?" Willow whined.
"You're in love with him."
"Are you sure?" Willow asked.
Buffy burst out laughing. "Am I sure? What do I have to be sure about? I've known it for years. You've known it for years! And, yeah, it wasn't always him. And for him, it wasn't always you. You've both had other relationships—great ones—but now it's right for the two of you to be together. It's you and him and a baby, and yeah, I'm sure. You're in love with him."
"Oh, God, I am, aren't I?" Willow groaned, but she couldn't help cracking a smile. "So, what do I do now?"
"Just cherish him," Buffy directed her, giggling. "Ooh, and also? Tell me about the smoochies. Vicarious thrills are my only joy in life."
Willow laughed at her friend. "Oh, please. I heard you're all enamored of the undead again. Which, hello, Buff. Maybe a live one next time?"
"Do not judge me, you…unwed mother, you," Buffy teased good-naturedly.
Willow gasped melodramatically. "Slut."
"Crack ho."
"Now that's just wrong, Buffy. You know drugs are bad."
"True dat," Buffy said solemnly. "I'll admit to my share of vices, but unnatural highs are a slippery slope."
"So is sleeping with vampires," Willow said, arching her eyebrow. Which she was sure Buffy could sense through the phone lines.
"Touche. But all the other guys around here speak, like, this other language. It's a real barrier," she said with mock sincerity, easily playing the blonde card to change the subject.
"Well, maybe you should come back to Sunnydale," Willow suggested casually. "I cruised Xander's site the other day, and there are some fine-lookin' guys out here. Guys who are tan, because they can be in the sun without bursting into flame. Hard-workin' guys with muscles."
"Mmm…muscles," Buffy replied. "Bears considering."
"Bears considering what?" Willow asked, confused.
Buffy laughed. "Uh…picnic baskets. Boy, you've really got that third trimester scatterbrain thing goin' on, Will."
"Ohhh, I get it—hey, I resent that."
"Sorry, couldn't resist. Now back to the kissing details, please."
"I dunno, Buffy," Willow said. "I'm not sure I can remember…my mind's such a blur nowadays…"
"Will," Buffy whined.
"And besides, it'd probably be too weird for you. I mean, one best friend talking about kissing the other best friend. There's gotta be a conflict of interest in there somewhere."
"Willow!"
"Okay, okay. On one condition," Willow said.
"Anything—geez!" Buffy said, exasperated.
"You've gotta move back here soon. I'm racking up phone bills left and right here."
"Geez, Will. I said I'd consider it," Buffy whined.
"No fair," Willow countered. "You were considering the hotties, not the best friend who needs free babysitting in a few months."
Buffy sighed dramatically. "Free babysitting if—and only if—you immediately tell me about the smoochies!"
Willow giggled and launched into a recount of one of the best, if most confusing, nights of her life.
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To be continued.