Page 5 – Contributors: momOf3wizards; SchmergoWeasley; SeventhChild; cowsgomoo; Sheree; Meeeeeehman1010; and thedaughterofHP.
Dear Diary,
I am pacing the floors. Rosy is due to have the babies. Dumbledore is watching me like a hawk and has forbidin me to go into the girls bathroom. Aparently some girl has been complaing that I am always in there every time she wants to cry in peace. It must be that wanna be Emo girl. Well, Rosie well have a nice dinner tonight if I can just find a way to get to her with out Dumbledore spotting me. I am seriously thinking about asking Minnie for help. Maybe that would get Rosy to like her more. Yes yes, thats what I am gonna do. Of course I'll have to threaten a nice little curse if she tells anyone.
Love
(still working on this)...ydlom drol ma I
Dear Diary,
It's a girl! It's a girl! Rosy came right into the dormitory to tell me. She named it "Dolores Umbridge!" Well, the baby isn't too pretty, but I guess that's what the offspring of a basilisk and some stupid boyfriend of Minnie's looks like!
The party is tonight! I bought a new black dress for the occasion. Rosy prefers that one to the red one, because the sequins on it remind her of scales.
Your favorite new basilisk-girl godfather,
seussi eman htiw yug emos
P.S. Has anyone else noticed that 'some' backward is 'emos?' I'll have to look into that!
Dear Diary,
Dolores is quite a hideous little turnpike, but I'm sure I'll learn to love her.
At the moment, I'm trying to figure out the relevancy of the word 'emos' spelling 'some' backwards. I asked Minnie about it, and she tried to shove a spoon in my ear.
She loves me so.
Dumbledore is definitely still tailing me though, but he's also turned his attentions to that idiot Hagrid. I know he's hiding an aracmantula, so perhaps I'll dream up a beautifully woven plot...
New line to poem: Why do nice girls use spoons instead of forks?
Love from
emoserit gnitteg si sihT
Dear Diary,
Hagrid is acting weirder lately, I think its because I'm spying on him. I had been watching "Desperate Housewives" in the Chamber while I babysat Dolores and I came up with a brillient plan. I'll frame Hagrid and say that the creepy giant spider he's hiding has been the source of all the student deaths. When I discussed my plan with Rosy, she got mad and said that she wanted credit for killing the kids and that if I framed the spider she would eat Myrtle. I said this was a great idea and that if Rosy ate Myrtle then I wouldn't have to keep running to the kitchens for roast pig (yes, her weird cravings are gone, course now Dolores has a thing for chewing on my shoes.)
From,
... heck I don't even know anymore.
Dear Diary,
Dolores is at a difficult stage right now. I am having to wear long sleeves even though it is warm out to hide the bites up and down my are. Good thing I was able to steal that bottle of antivenom potion last time I was in the hospital wing to have the spoon removed from my ear. One of the bites became quite infected. It looks like a skull with a snake coming out of its mouth. What a great tatoo that would make.
As far as my plan goes I have been trying to get Olive Hornby to lure Myrtle into the bathroom but apparently she is very predjuduce against guys who wear eyeliner.
New line: Why do nice girls tease me about my makeup?
Love,
Tom aka Lord of the Rings Riddle
Bye, bye eyeliner. Hello, hair plants. Going for purple. Very sexy, you know. Maybe Minnie will like me better now.
Anyway, that annoying Olive Hornby has still been unable to draw that little brat into the bathroom. Alas...maybe someday.
And Dumbledor stopped me to talk to me in the hall today. Asked me if I was okay or whatever. The jerk. He just doesn't approve of my new look. What a perfect little rebel I am!
New line: Will girls like a rebel better?
--Tom
P.S. Found something called 'Star Wars.' That Darth guy is really cool.
Dear Diary,
Wow, I was visited by my future self again.
He gave me some diary pages from his/my fifth year.
They're wierd.
Little Dolores did the cutest thing today.
She gave me a quill, and when I wrote with it, I got a cut into the back of my hand. Awww.
Lord Moldyshorts/strohsydloM droL
Dear Diary,
Minnie said that my purple hair is stupid and that I ought to wash it out.
Well. I tried.
It's unfortunate that the potion I used is just a bit more...permanent. It says on the bottle that it takes 35 washes to get it all out.
My silky and beautiful hair is starting to clump.
Rosy and Dolores think it's hilarious. I think it's just another reason for me to sit down and cry.
Pray for me.
elddiR taerg ehT
Dear Diary,
Dolores doesn't think my hairdo is 'Ministry Approved.' Hey, I didn't get it either, but first words are always important! I was so proud, I showed her off to Minnie. It was hate at first site. Oh well, they'll probably never meet again, and I promised Minnie I'd try to do something about those chomp marks on her arm.
Slightly wearily,
em dlo lil tsuj
Dear diary,
Future self came again. Said something about the Gaunts? And Horcruxes..whatever they are. Minnie is avoiding me again. I'm starting to get annoyed by Dolores. Rosy is getting ready for operation: .M! Squash Mudblood Myrtle! I'm trying the Gryffindor look now. Maybe to impress Minnie.
signed,
nirehtylS/rodniffyrG Tsewen Eht
Dear Diary,
Ugh, I can't believe I almost put those disgusting Gryffindork robes on! I feel dirty.
Dolores laughed when I told her my plan, but seemed quite in awe as I took my t-shirt off. Maybe it's that new hippogriff transfer tattoo...I thought it was a bit strange.
Anyway, I didn't quite get undressed. Rosy came in and interrupted, telling me that Myrtle was in the girl's bathroom!
We slithered along and voila! She was crying like a girl. I actually became quite tearful myself, but Rosy told me to concentrate, so I did.
I spoke to Rosy in parseltongue, and then Myrtle came out of the cubicle and saw Rosy's eyes and died. It was brilliant.
I'm so proud of my snakey pies! Now the whole school is talking about it. Strange that they don't seem to care about the other kids that died, like Minnie's boyfriends.
Oh well. All's well that ends well, I think...then again, Dumbledore is creeping around me even more often than usual.
I fear he might suspect that I...keep a diary. And then he will tell the whole school and I will be a laughing stock, almost as laughable as the Huffleduffs.
Oh the shame!
Sincerely yours,
Riddle-kins (Writing my name backwards is a chore)
Dear Diary -
I am in a wonderful mood today.
I was walking by a mirror, and I suddenly noticed how absolutely gorgeous I am.
I wonder why Minnie hasn't noticed?
Oh, and I've heard whispers that everyone thinks that Hagrid is guilty for Myrtle's death. Stupid git, he deserves whatever trouble he gets! He's always prancing around behind Dumbledore and saying that no one had better ever insult Dumbledore so long as he's around. Like I couldn't take him!...Well...he is kind of, er...big...if you know what I mean...
Anyway,
Lots of Love!
Your Riddlekins!
P.S. Little Dolores keeps on stealing these horrible little kitten figurines from somewhere or other. She's awfully cute, but there is a limit. I mean...kittens! I must put a stop to this immediately.
Dear Diary,
Hagrid got his wand snapped and was expelled today! I'm so happy! After some ingenious work on my part I framed Hargrid and completly cleared my name of any suspicion. The headmaster even said that I would get a trophy for my saving the school by exposing the "Monster from the Chamber". He honestly thinks that I would let that giant spider into the Chamber! Dirty insect, Rosy and Dolores could eaten that thing for breakfast!
Rosy and I have become closer after the murder, whenever I have classes I miss her so much I could cry (and sometimes I do, thats gotten me some pretty weird looks from the teachers!) Every evening I try to get to the Chamber to see her. Rosy Fluffy Slyther and Dolores Umbridge are the only friends I have.
Future self visited again. One of these days I need to ask him for make up tips. He congratulated me on the brillient murder and told me that I was on the path to greatness! But he did look kind of sad when I introduced him to Rosy and Dolores. When I asked him about it, future self told me that I should cherish my time with them and warned Rosy about flame-colored birds and kids with lightning-shaped scars. Rosy had already been tramatized by the incident with her choking on the red bird when she was little. Poor Rosy didn't get much sleep that night.
Tom
Dear Diary,
I spoke to Dippet shortly before Hagrid was caught, and he said that I will be unable to stay at Hogwarts for the summer.
I can't say I'm surprised, but I hoped that since the one who 'opened' the chamber has been caught snigger that he might change his mind.
He didn't.
Anyway, I have decided to kill my father this summer! What a joyous holiday it will be. I have to leave Rosy and Dolores at Hogwarts, so I will go it alone.
I have decided to ask my Father a few questions before I kill him:
1.) Do you enjoy writing poetry?
2.) Are you an emo?
3.) Does this new noir eyeliner suit me?
4.) Was my mother really an ugly tramp or have I been misinformed?
5.) If she was an ugly tramp, then why do you have that ghastly taste in women and is it genetic?
6.) Have you ever kept snakes for pleasure?
7.) What do you think of my silky hair?
I think seven questions are lucky, but I should add some more if I think of them.
With love from Riddikulous! Ha ha. I have a sense of humour.
Now I have to cry. Alone.
Dear diary,
It's getting close to ssummer so i'm saying good-bye to Rosy and Dolores. I found a book called 'The history of the Gaunts'. I think i'll read it. Minnie, I think will be Head Girl next year and I will be a prefect, senior. Rosy tells me that my dad lives in Hangleton...I like that name...maybe I should hang my dad. Nah, i'll just kill him. I'm gonna ask that fatso Slughorn about Horcruxes. Can you beleive he keeps a penseive? Only little girls keep them, diarys are so much better.
Riddle-me-not
Dear Diary,
I have been crying more than ever, it could be 'cause I am sad about leaving my little snakiewakies but I think its more because I am still sore after sitting down on the Mimbulus mimbletonia, Minnie put in my seat during charms today. I think it was her way of showing how much she is gonna miss me this summer. Slughorn had loads of great info for me on horcruxes. Infact when I kill my dad I am gonna put a part of my soul into this diary. Rosy and Dolores loved the idea.
New line. Why are nice girls such a pain in the butt?
Your Darling Riddlekins Forever!
Dear Diary,
It is the last day of school! And soon, although I have already poured enough of it through my great writings, I shall pour even more of my soul into you!
I told Minnie about my father, how he's a useless, stupid muggle. I'm sure I saw a flicker of sympathy behind those stern eyes, especially when my own eyes began to water dreadfully.
I do love Minnie so. I told her, and she brought down a chandelier on my head. She couldn't quite get it at first, but I told her that she had to turn the screw the other way, and then it worked and I ended up in the hospital wing.
Never mind. I do think my poem is becoming quite beautiful!
And, even better, Minnie visited and she patted me on the head in goodbye!
Then she chucked my orange juice on me. I didn't mind so much, because I prefer pineapple. Then she left, and Dumbledore arrived. He's such a pain in the...
Astronomy department. If you catch my drift.
"I've got my eye on you Tom." He said, far more dramatically than was necessary.
"Of course you do!" I replied. "I'm a beautiful genius!"
He looked at me as though I were sniff mad, and then left.
Well, wasn't that a kick in the teeth. I thought he was going to make me head boy!
See you at the scary orphanage!
Riddle-kins!
I'm so emo it hurts
Dear Diary,
Today was the first day I've been away from Rosy and Dolores and I THINK I'M GOING INSANE! I miss them too much so I must find a way to bring them with me. I went to the orphanage on the Hogwarts Express so I couldn't get back that way so I stole a broom and flew back to Hogwarts. It's actually quite pretty from the air. I did some sneaky sneaking and snuck into the castle when Slughorn came out. I crept into the girl's bathroom and slid down the chute to get to the Chamber. Rosy and Dolores were so happy to see me! After a big group hug, I relized that I didn't have a plan to get them back to the orphanage or what we were going to do once we got there. Anyway, I managed to at least smuggle them out of Hogwarts and into the Forbidden Forest where I'm currently writing this. I started a fire and now am leaning up against a sleeping Dolores (she's gotten big, like her mommy!) while Rosy Fluffy Slyther hunts.
I think the only thing we can do is travel on foot back to the orphanage... ...you know what? I'm through with the orphanage! I have the basiliks as family! We will go to Little Hangleton and kill my dad! Whooooo!
I need a new name now that I'm going to be living of the land and surviving like my ancient ancestors:
Dances-with-Basiliks Riddle
Review please?