"I wasn't sure if you were aware that we have the Harvest Festival coming up in the middle of fall." Thomas bobbed his head to the beat of the music and grinned in her direction.
Claire nodded as she swayed her skirt. "Rick had mentioned something about it. What do I need to do to prepare for it?" She recalled him saying how the entire town was going to be depending on her and that alone stirred up anxiety that she quickly tried to quell.
"Well, we set up a large stock pot in the middle of the town square and everyone brings an ingredient to contribute to the stew. The thing kind of governs itself," he admitted with a good-natured laugh. "We never have the same soup twice, as people bring all sorts of things. That being said, it helps to have a lot of fresh vegetables as the base. It's a reaalllly big pot." Thomas gave her a keen look.
Claire understood that she was being asked to donate said vegetables to the festival, and she'd likely need to bring more than most of the other villagers.
I'm the resident farmer, after all. It's my job.
The very thought made her feel a little giddy.
This is going to be the best stew Mineral Town's had in years. I have to make it special…
"Of course – I'd be honored to help provide the base. What kinds of things are popular to add?"
He gave her a gentler spin this time. "It's really best if you just bring whatever you feel like, honestly. The whole festival revolves around people contributing what they have. On leaner years, Pete would bring some of his extras that weren't fit to sell. Doug was able to make the most out of it – a fine chef, that one. Sometimes people don't have anything to give at all, but we never turn them away. People like Carter who don't have much of an income can eat a hot meal and we always send everyone home with leftovers."
"W-Well, this year will be the first one you will be able to have local produce." She hoped that she sounded more confident than she felt.
He was glad that she seemed enthusiastic about the event. "I coordinate the festivals in both Mineral Town and Forget-Me-Not Valley. Obviously I can't be in two places at once, so The Valley will be having their festival the day before ours. I think it would be good for you to come along with me and get a better idea of how the whole community comes together to participate. We have a couple of resident farmers there, and I think it would be good for you to get to know them. Perhaps they could share some trade secrets with you."
Claire knew that not too long ago, she would have taken this as a pointed comment on her lack of experience. "I'd really appreciate that. I met Pete earlier this summer and he's a nice guy."
Thomas let out a loud laugh that startled her. "Oh, that Pete's a scream. Vesta runs a farm there, too. Great gal – very friendly. I think you'll really enjoy meeting the people from Forget-Me-Not. I go there every day to pick up the shipments. Any time you'd like to come along with me, you're more than welcome."
She considered the offer. She was more than just a little bit curious about what Pete's farm looked like. "Sure, sounds great!" Her smile grew as excited butterflies flew around in her stomach. She was going to learn so much…
The young woman's eyes shifted toward Cliff. He was standing beside Gray, and the two of them appeared to be listening intently to a story Mary was telling; the librarian's eyes were glowing. A flash of guilt nearly threw Claire off balance as her face fell, her thoughts about the Harvest Festival disappearing. Did Cliff avoid Gray and Mary when he was around Claire in order to keep from hurting her feelings?
Do I make him feel like he can't spend time with his friends? I'm sure I made things awkward…
Thomas's words were a mumbled mess to Claire as she fretted over her friend's feelings. He gave her a hearty clap on the back, snapping her back to reality. "Great, I'll see you the day before the festival then! I think we can expect good things from Mystic Acres!"
"Thank you!" A smile reappeared on Claire's face as she waved goodbye to Mayor Thomas. She was immediately approached by Manna, who was returning from the buffet table.
"Claire, sweetie! Aren't you looking adorable tonight? Looking to snatch up some hearts? Look at that flirty little dress – you look cute enough to eat! You're not quite as daring as my Aja was; that girl liked to show a little bit of skin! Ah, Duke would get so mad, but she sure was pretty…" She frowned slightly and her eyes moved to the paper plate she was carrying. Looking to turn toward a more pleasant topic, she focused on the fluffy dessert in her hands. "Ah, have you tried my ambrosia salad yet? I added extra coconut and pineapple because I know how Kai likes them." She loaded up a forkful and held it in front of the young woman's mouth. "Open up, dearie; this dish is one of my best-kept secrets!"
Claire didn't care for marshmallows unless they were plain or roasted over an open flame, the only exception being fudge. Still, she had a hard time refusing when the fork was shoved in her face, especially when said food was acting as a distraction from Manna's heartache. Claire almost wanted to ask what had happened to Aja, but she knew now was not the time or the place. She took a bite of the food and nodded politely, forcing a smile on her lips. "Thank you."
"So glad you could make it tonight," Manna continued, stirring the remaining salad on her plate and spearing a maraschino cherry. "It's important to take some time off and enjoy the moment, you know? I've heard you've been so busy at the farm with your harvests coming in, so it'll be good for you to kick back and relax a bit. Have you seen your young man lately?" She bit into the fruit, a smug grin playing at her lips.
Claire's eyes instinctively flew toward Cliff and she shook her head in confusion; she certainly shouldn't think of him as hers. She recalled the note he wrote her the other day and the manner in which he had signed it and her face immediately warmed. Her gaze moved toward Gray and she let out a tiny sigh; he most definitely wasn't hers, she reminded herself.
Wait, why didn't I look at him first?
Her focus moved back on Manna's words and the young woman gulped, panic setting in. Surely she had taken too long with her response. "Wh-what do you mean?" She felt the need to keep her voice low.
"You know," Manna bumped her with a sassy hip and leaned in to whisper into her ear, "Your dream man. The good kisser."
Claire's eyes widened in surprise as she quickly shook her head. "Ah, no more visits from him!" she laughed anxiously, averting her eyes. She was wondering if she should begin to regret sharing her dream with her, but Manna seemed to keep her lips sealed on the matter to anyone else.
"Aw, that's too bad. He might come back to see you; who knows? Recurring dreams are known to happen, and they are your mind's way of trying to get you to pay attention to something going on in your life. And, hey, if he doesn't show up, no big deal. Looks like there are plenty of cuties here tonight. What a lucky time to be a young, single lady, am I right?"
Claire shrugged in response, unsure of why she felt so flustered. "Ah… I'm surprised Duke didn't come with you this evening." She looked over at Anna and Sasha and couldn't help but notice that they showed up without their husbands as well. As a matter of fact, the only couples at the party were Karen and Rick along with Mary and Gray.
Manna rolled her eyes, swinging around her empty fork like a conductor's baton. "All of the men are back at the bar, doing their grumpy, manly thing – whatever that is. Doug's probably got his hands full with old salts tonight. Kai's not exactly the most popular with the male population here in Mineral Town. Men can get so strange sometimes; it's like they have this weird pride. Between you and me, I think that they're intimidated by Kai's natural allure. Ah, men, men, men…" Manna let out a combination of a sigh and a giggle. "Oh, well. Both you and me know that Kai is a sweetheart, otherwise we wouldn't be here celebrating with him on his big day."
The young woman nodded. "Yeah. Kai is a really nice person." Her eyes wandered to the dance floor and he was gently dancing with Lillia, a nervous Rick sitting nearby as Karen attempted to lure him into distracting conversation.
"Ah, listen to me going on and on! Well, I saw how Thomas snatched you away from your friend. I'm sure if you just asked Cliff, he'd be more than happy to go down on you."
It took a moment for Claire to register the words and her eyes popped open, her cheeks burning as she wrung her hands. Surely she had misheard… "Ah, er… M-Manna? Wh-what did you say?"
The woman cocked her head toward him. "I said if you asked Cliff, he'd gladly get down with you. You know, dance. I'm not as ignorant as Thomas is about lingo." She playfully shook her hips to the beat. "Is the loud music getting to you, you silly girl?" A smirk played at the corner of her mouth as she observed the bright hue of Claire's face. "Did you think I said something else or what?"
She shook her head so violently that her blonde locks got tousled. "Ah, just misheard, that's all." She bade Manna goodbye as she headed in Cliff's direction, trying to push the woman's words out of her mind.
"Aw, are we being too loud and rowdy?" Ann looked up from her food and whined as Harris entered the establishment.
He shot her a bewildered look. He looked down at his wrapped plate and his smile fell a bit. "I… just wanted to have fun with everyone." He added his contribution of cubed cheeses to the buffet table, wondering if it had been a wise idea to come to the party. After all, he wasn't particularly close with anyone here; perhaps he stuck out like a sore thumb…
Ann gave him an apologetic look. "You know you're always welcome, Harris!" She gave him a nudge on the shoulder and he let out a nervous chuckle. "Ooooh, cheeses… Okay, the man checks out alright!" the redhead proclaimed with a playful giggle, grabbing his arm and ushering him to the buffet table.
"Well, I'd hope so. I got those cheeses from the bazaar over in Zephyr Town. They're made with local fresh herbs. Rosemary, lavender, chives…" Harris nodded as he perked up a little and took a piece for himself and popped it into his mouth.
"Welcome, welcome!" Kai was once again surprised at his unusual guest list. A smile spread across his face at Harris's rosy cheeks; it was likely the constable didn't do much socializing in his age group because of his job. He wanted to make everyone feel comfortable. Kai tossed a lei over Harris's head and he grinned.
"Thank you for the flowers and the kind welcome." His eyes darted toward Thomas, who was making train noises and loudly referring to himself as The Party Conductor. "I, uh… I hope my father hasn't been too much trouble. He's been a little… excited since the great turnout at the Cow Festival, and now he won't stop talking about the Fireworks Festival." Harris gave Kai a rueful smile.
"He's been fine," Ann popped up behind Kai. "Very entertaining! Full-on festival mode!"
Harris shook his head, embarrassed at his father's behavior. He looked up and Ann had thrust a cup of punch in his face, nearly sloshing it out of its vessel.
"Have a drink! Karen's spiked punch!"
"You should know better than to offer an officer drugs at a party, right?" Harris cocked his head at her curiously, a smirk playing at his mouth. "I'm afraid I might have to bring you in."
Ann's blue eyes widened in surprise. "Huh?"
He shook his head and let out a gentle chuckle. "Just kidding. So you can dish it, but you can't take it?" He took a deep drink of the beverage and choked, his eyes watering. "Wow… you can really taste the vodka, huh?" Harris laughed a little harder. "Karen's handiwork for sure."
"You know it!" Ann gave him a playful grin. She returned to the table and popped a few more pieces of cheese into her mouth. "This cheese is awesome! Y'know, we get this really good butter from the farm over in the Valley. I wonder if they make cheese like this…"
Harris's face lit up as he took a paper plate and began to fill it with snacks. "Honestly, it's worth the trip to Zephyr Town. Their bazaar has all sorts of things you wouldn't expect. I got some cookies made with fresh honey and some spicy jerky."
Ann shoved more cheese into her mouth as she listened with great interest. She grabbed another plate of her own and followed along, picking and choosing things that couldn't fit on her previous dishes.
Surprised and flattered he had such a spellbound audience, Harris tried to remember some of the other kinds of things he had found there. "Oh, and kettle cooked popcorn, made to order. Also, vanilla fudge with real maple syrup…"
Her eyes only grew huger as she imagined the foods in her head.
Kai laughed at the pair and turned to Popuri, hoping to catch a bit more time with her. In truth, he had been seeking her company much more often this summer. Something about her had changed and he no longer saw her as the sisterly type he had to watch over. She was playful and cheerful, but there was an extra layer of something to her that he had never noticed before and that he couldn't quite place his finger on. Her pink head of hair was painfully easy to spot, and she was sitting beside her mother with a slight frown on her face.
Lillia was looking rather pale faced as she gave her children and Karen a weak smile. Kai couldn't help but wonder if his own mother had possessed a similar tender selflessness. He liked to imagine that they had the same kind eyes and demeanor. She leaned forward and held her forehead as if in pain. Kai's heart stopped for a brief moment and his blood ran cold as he hurried over toward them.
"You really shouldn't push yourself, Mom," Popuri was saying. "A little extra rest tonight will have you feeling better tomorrow." She carefully tucked one of Lillia's pink curls behind her ear and gently touched her forehead with an air of calm experience that Kai had never seen before. "You don't feel warm, but let's not push it, okay?" Popuri's voice was gentle as she placed her hand over her mother's.
"I'll take you home," Kai automatically interjected. Now that he had spent some more time with the kind woman and genuinely enjoyed her company, the thought of her going home early made him a little depressed. The least he could to was help her get home safely. Perhaps he had pushed her too far when they danced together…
"Don't be silly, Kai," Karen replied firmly. "This is your party. It would be ridiculous if the host left. "We'll take her home, right, Poppy?"
"Yeah!" the young woman chimed in, giving Kai a kind smile. "We had a really good time tonight, Kai! Me and Karen will come back once Mom gets settled in for the night, okay?"
Kai nodded mutely, still wondering if it he was part of the reason she wasn't feeling well. He watched guiltily as the women helped Lillia stand.
"Thank you for the dance," she murmured, giving Kai a gentle pat on the shoulder. "It's been years… since I danced with my dear Roderick…"
"And I'm sure when he returns with your cure you two will have plenty of celebratory dancing to catch up on," he replied, unsure why his throat was tightening.
Lillia's eyes became very shiny as she cupped his cheek with her hand. "You're a good boy, Kai. Have a wonderful birthday."
"Thank you, Mrs. Lockard."
She shook her head and gave him a soft chuckle. "Lillia is fine. Please call me that."
Too distracted by the fact that his mother requested that Kai call her by her first name, Rick almost didn't notice that he hadn't offered himself to take her home. It definitely beat being stuck here with Kai… He let out a small sigh as the door closed behind them and he looked around the room. Gray looked like he was about to flip one of the buffet tables and figured it would be best not to engage. Rick let out a small sigh; he had promised his family that he would not speak to Claire about work, as much as he was itching to.
Maybe just a couple quick questions about how her corn is coming along… I'm pretty sure I heard Mayor Thomas say something needing help for a festival, so would it really be that bad if I-
He was distracted by a familiar voice. "Did you get a chance to try this? Karen whipped it up; it's pretty good."
He didn't think that Kai of all people would offer him a drink. Memories of his promise to have a more open mind about Kai flooded his mind and he felt a wave of shame. "Thanks," he managed to say with a slight smile. "I… I think tonight was good for Mom… She hasn't gotten out in a while."
"Yeah, Popuri said that her health and general mood have taken a turn for the worse since the beginning of the month." Kai sipped from his own cup.
Rick felt a lump form in his throat. Was Kai aware that date had marked the anniversary of their father leaving to find a cure for her? "Yeah… Her mind gets stuck on Dad this time of year… She usually bounces back a little, but… yeah… her usual state isn't very energetic."
Kai was staring out into the crowd to avoid Rick's gaze. He had a feeling that Lillia wasn't the only person dwelling on Rod's absence. He watched Harris give Claire a gentle twirl before returning her to an eager Cliff's arms, the constable laughing as Ann made up her own dance moves and joined back up with him. The four were animatedly talking to each other as they danced. Kai was glad that they were having a good time; everyone seemed to be. He looked back over at Rick and realized that he was mistaken. The young man downed his punch in a similar manner to the way he had seen Karen do when she was upset.
"You're named after him, aren't you? Your father, I mean…"
Rick poured himself another cup of punch and Kai was surprised to see him silently offer to top off his tumbler as well. He set down his cup and thanked him as Rick swiftly refilled it and handed it back to him. "Yeah… I used to be so proud of that, too… Everyone says Dad's a hero for going out to find a cure for Mom. If he really wanted to be heroic, he would stay by her side while she's suffering like this. I can guarantee part of her health problems are caused by the stress of him being gone and hardly keeping in touch."
Kai frowned and chose his words cautiously. "I guess everyone's got their own idea of what makes a hero."
Rick's instinct was to disagree, but he realized how true Kai's words were with a small nod. They drank in silence for a couple of minutes, leaning against the buffet table. Rick reached for a melon bread and peeled the cookie coating off, tossing it into his mouth in a crumbly mess. He took a large bite of the center, looking out at the crowd. He ate the way a small child would, and Kai couldn't help but see a side of him that he never had before. Perhaps there was more to him than a straight-laced, fun-hating workaholic.
Rick's voice was hoarse. "He may be doing what he thinks is right, but I hope that I am never like him."
Kai grabbed a paper napkin, wiping up a few drops of punch off of the table and tilted his head at him, a guilty grin crossing his lips. "I guess that makes two of us. If I ever turn out like my old man, it would be my worst nightmare."
Rick finished his bun, dusting the crumbs off of his shirt. He turned toward his companion with a smirk. "You don't want to be like him? Something tells me your dad must be a lot like me, then."
He was given a snort in reply. "Yeah, actually."
They both burst into laughter.
"Come, now, I know you all love my tarot readings. What do you say, girls? Who should I do first?" Manna reached into her bag and produced a deck of cards. As she opened the package and began to shuffle, a single card slipped out of her hand and she let out a squeak in surprise.
It slid across the floor and tapped Cliff's shoe. At the sound of the skidding, he curiously bent over to pick it up. The young man stared at the unusual card, unsure of whether or not it was right side up; it had an odd picture of a man with a glowing halo around his head who was either dancing a jig or hanging upside down from a tree. Upon standing back up and turning around, he noticed Manna waving to him. He walked the card back over to her, giving a shaky smile as he tried to repress his recent argument with Gray.
"Thanks, sweetie! Which one did you get?"
Cliff flipped the card over once again, his hands trembling. "The Hanging Man…?" He had seen people read fortunes before but he never got a good look at the cards. He studied the image once again, trying to figure out which way it was supposed to go.
"Ah!" Manna's face lit up. "Which way was it facing when you picked it up?"
He realized he was likely going to get an impromptu fortune read. "Like this." He held the card right side up. "So he's supposed to be hanging upside down…?"
Manna nodded enthusiastically. "Breaking old behavior and going with the flow to better yourself. Enduring an unpleasant trial to reach a goal for the greater good. Looks like something big is in store for you, honey. You want to take a seat and I can do a more thorough reading? I could even read your love fortune. Maybe your soul mate is in this very room! You never know!"
She wasn't blind to the way his deep blue eyes wistfully flicked toward the back of a blonde head. He blushed so deeply his ears turned red. It wasn't that long ago that he had convinced himself that he was meant to be alone. "Ah, n-no thank you… It's kind of you to offer, though…"
"Well, just let me know if you change your mind. Feel free to stop by the winery any time and I can do a reading for you – any kind! It would be fun to do one for someone new. My usual clients are all at this table-" Manna gestured with an exaggerated sweeping motion of the arm and knocked over her empty tumbler, which rolled across the floor noisily. Cliff hurried after it to retrieve it and bent over to grab it.
"Ack, I'm so clumsy! Good thing that was plastic, huh? Thank you so much, hon!"
"No problem," he gave her a friendly nod and bid them goodbye before rejoining his friends.
"So what was that all about?" Sasha raised her eyebrows.
Manna shuffled her cards, a playful smirk on her lips. "Just trying to loosen him up a bit. Looked a little high-strung, no? I bet it had something to do with… Ah, perhaps I should hold my theories. Besides, I've been doing a bit of recon. That boy's more clammed up than anyone I've ever met, but I think I learned a little bit about him tonight."
"Don't think I didn't see you over there teasing Claire, too," Sasha admonished, but she looked more amused than anything else. "What you call 'recon' is usually code word for sticking your nose where it doesn't belong."
Anna's ears perked up as she casually tapped her painted nails on the sides of her cup. "And what kind of information do you have for us?"
Manna gave her an impish grin, her eyes glittering. "Nothing that can be shared."
Sasha rolled her eyes. "That's just her way of saying she has nothing."
Manna said nothing as she looked down at the tarot card before shuffling it back into her deck.
Being back within the company of Mary and Elli made things much more tolerable for Gray. Still, he wasn't thrilled that he didn't have a chance to explain how his conversation with Cliff went before Mary had eagerly waved over Claire. The blonde linked arms with an expressionless Cliff as they approached the group anxiously.
Best keep the conversation tame...
"Well, that's something you don't see everyday." Gray nodded in the direction of Rick, who was actually having a civilized conversation with Kai. It was likely because of Karen and Popuri's presence but still surprising, nonetheless.
He looked over at Cliff, who was standing uncomfortably between Elli and Claire with a frown.
Are we going to end up like those two? Fighting more than actually speaking? I thought we were doing alright before this whole mess...
Distracting himself from such thoughts, he took a look around the room. Harris and Ann were chatting at the buffet table, the young woman loading his plate with her famous chocolate cookies despite his gentle protests. Thomas was leading a line dance of some sort, a slightly tipsy Anna resting her hands low on his hips rather than his waist or shoulders. Sasha and Manna had joined the party train, all laughing a little too loudly to be sober.
And Grandpa had reminded me not to make a fool of myself tonight…
Well, I guess it's already too late for that.
Gray rolled his eyes. "Yeesh, get a load of Thomas the Dank Engine over there." He cocked his head in the direction of the mayor with a smirk. Cliff's expression was still unreadable and Claire was surprised to see Mary give her boyfriend a stern glare.
"I thought we discussed that word." Her voice didn't lose its sweetness, but that was part of what made it so threatening. Claire vaguely wondered if Anna scolded her daughter the very same way. "I know that may be a term that you picked up from the city, but you are using it incorrectly." Mary turned toward Claire and gave her a quick playful wink. "I haven't been to the city in years, and I think that slang died a while ago. You better watch out, or Mayor Thomas is going to come to you as a source for hip lingo." She waggled her eyebrows at him.
It was at this moment that Claire realized for the first time in a long while that Gray lacked the accent she associated with a majority of the inhabitants of Mineral Town. She wondered how far away his city had been from hers and realized with a bit of sadness that the topic could have been something for them to bond over. He wasn't hers, she reminded herself and her heart began to drop a bit.
She was disrupted from her thoughts when Gray burst into laughter and Mary gave him a playful pout, lightly punching his arm as she attempted to stifle a giggle.
Gray felt his chest relax and found his arm around Mary, squeezing her as he forgot whose company they were in.
Elli rolled her eyes as everyone laughed. "Really, you two act like an old married couple already."
Married…
Claire hadn't even given thought about the two considering marriage. How would she cope with it? How could her heart stand to see Gray with a joyful gleam in his eyes, knowing that someone else was able to give that to him and she couldn't? Would she notice the moment there was one fewer blue feather in the case at Jeff's shop? Claire's laughter died off and was thankfully unnoticed, but she had blocked out the rest of the conversation.
Mary's face flushed a bit. "Really, Elli, you're getting too far ahead of yourself. You need to read something else other than those romance novels at the library."
"Yeah, you should try a good wartime story!" Gray piped up, looking at his girlfriend with the kind, warm eyes that he had been hesitant to show in public up until now. "Or you can be lame like Cliff and read nothing but field guides." The words slipped out unexpectedly.
Cliff swallowed, and there was an emptiness in his eyes that took Mary and Elli by surprise. His voice still remained cordial. "There's nothing wrong with doing a little research on what's growing around here. Besides, that's what your father came to Mineral Town to study, right, Mary?" He was too focused on maintaining his composure to notice Claire's pale face as she quietly backed away.
"Exactly." The librarian gave him a grateful nod. "There are a lot of different things to read other than romance, though, Elli. Hey, Claire, what do you like to…?" Her voice trailed off as they noticed she was no longer standing with them.
Self-hatred bubbled up inside of her as she stubbornly blinked away the tears forming in the corners of her eyes, her throat tightening.
I hate this, but... it's better than crying in front of everyone inside.
She stood on the wet sand of the beach, watching the sun slowly dip into the sky as the darkened water's roar attempted to melt her heartache and worries.
I really thought I had a better handle on things. I can't believe how pathetic I'm being right now. There's a building full of people behind me, and I feel so lonely I can't stand it!
It had been a while, after all. Seeing the two of them together was bound to happen sometime, and she had mentally prepared for it. Their warm, wordless exchanges were to be expected.
Jealousy at this point? It's just immature. I had done so well at Ann's birthday party... I've come such a long way since that awful morning when Gray knocked on my door, and yet...
I feel like I'm cemented in place.
Why does it hurt so much now?
There was a tightness in her chest that throbbed and she felt dizzy from distress.
And Mary was trying to be so nice about it, too. She kept trying to steer the conversation away from their relationship...
But it had been too late; her heart had shattered upon impact. She placed her fingers at her temples, attempting to stabilize her spinning world.
Why? Why am I still letting this situation have this kind of power over me? Am I really that weak?
A light touch at her arm broke her spell. Her chest relaxed as she felt a familiar calloused hand softly brush against her; Cliff's touches were always gentle. Their eyes met, and she saw the way his brows were slightly raised in concern. Surely he was looking for some sort of explanation for her childish behavior. His gaze was warm, and her face began to feel the same as she realized he would never judge her. Shyly ducking her head, she turned her gaze back to the waves. A trembling, fumbling arm intertwined with hers the way she did to comfort him. His fingertips tenderly grazed her knuckles as the ocean breeze played with their hair, sunny golden strands mingling with rich chocolate brown. They stood in silence for a few minutes, mesmerized by the waves rolling in and crashing on the beach.
As she found her words, her throat tightened as she attempted to squeeze them out. "I just... I wanted so badly for him to feel the same way about me as I do for him..." She cringed at her own cracking voice and looked at him, attempting to turn her twitching lips upward. A humorless laugh that resembled a bark escaped her. "It's kind of hard to just forget about him and let myself heal from the whole situation when he's... everywhere, you know? I guess that's what I get for moving to a small town like this." She let out a heavy sigh and her shoulders drooped when she did. She watched a wave tumble over the shore.
I can't believe Cliff's willing to listen to me whine like this... I don't deserve his kindness – it's my own fault chasing after someone who never wanted me. I brought it on myself.
She bit her lip when she became aware once more of Cliff's skin against hers.
He's too kind...
"But when I really think about it..." Claire's voice broke as she tucked a blonde lock behind her ear, her body relaxing as she felt his fingers brush her free hand. She took his fingers in her hand and gave them a grateful squeeze. "I think the hardest part of all of this – and maybe this makes me really selfish – it's seeing that he's so much happier... w-without me." She hung her head, closing her eyes as her internal dialogue harped at her.
Don't cry. Don't you dare cry. Don't be a crybaby!
A reply wasn't expected, and it wasn't given. Cliff silently stroked her arm soothingly as he looked out at the sunset. His mind traveled to their frequent visits to the church where they would sit in silence, simply existing together. The very action of being beside another soul was comforting – a physical reminder that he was not alone in the world, as he easily deluded himself into thinking time and time again. While he enjoyed her quiet company in those days, Carter not-so-subtly reminded him from time to time that it didn't work for everyone and it definitely wasn't appropriate for all situations.
He put his own problems with Gray aside for the moment and focused on Claire's predicament.
So she likes to talk things out... Maybe if I tried to do that, too...?
He quickly shook his head, as if to chase away the worries that came with the very thought.
Claire's voice was low, the result of some deep thinking on her own end. "He seems so much friendlier and warmer... and he actually seems like he has a sense of humor now..."
Another sigh.
Claire turned toward her friend, her lips turned into a frown that caused an uncomfortable pang in his chest. Her eyes were shiny, her brows knitted in concern. "It hurts because I'm seeing new things about him that I like... but I know that he can't be mine." Her shoulders stiffened and Cliff could feel her arms tense up as she turned toward him, searching his eyes. "Is it just me, or did he suddenly change around everyone?"
He poked the sand with his foot, rubbing the crook of his neck with his free hand. The passing seconds in silence felt like hours to Claire.
Cliff's lips turned downward as he gently shook his head. "No, he didn't change. He actually jokes around with us guys a lot... even if he doesn't appreciate a good pun." He gave her arm a gentle stroke, suppressing his feelings about the argument he had with Gray earlier.
Claire… we're focusing on Claire. The way Gray treated her - not what you're going through right now.
"He just... didn't know how to act around you. Or other people," he added bitterly, cringing at his own words.
I hope she doesn't think I'm defending the way he treated her. I wish I could tell her how he's not the person she imagines at all. Sometimes he can be so-
His face burned with shame.
And there I was, telling him how easy it would be to break his arm..
Guilt welled up within him, but he shoved it aside.
Anyway, he told her how he felt in the worst way possible. But, it's not like it's easy to reject someone. Though she's hurting, Claire listened and accepted his answer...
It's just that not everyone does that.
His blood ran cold and his eyes flickered for a moment before Claire's disraught reply swiftly brought him back to reality.
"All I ever wanted was for him to feel comfortable around me! I tried! I really did! I thought if I just tried hard enough..." She heaved out a large sigh.
Cliff held her arm a little closer. He wished that he could help her let go and allow her heart to be free. Furthermore, he longed to confess to her that there was already someone who cared deeply for her and would never let her go. The young man let out a wistful sigh that gratefully was disguised by the incoming waves. He wanted to take her into his arms and express how precious she was to him. He wished he could press his lips against hers and make her understand that she was a wonderful person who deserved all of the love in the world. He had a craving to recreate that beautiful dream he had of her the other night – kissing and giggling after sharing a glass of wine, her falling asleep in his arms, the frogs and crickets serenading them as they shared sweet whispers and promises in the dark...
The warmth radiating from Claire as she leaned into him snapped him back to reality. He put a careful arm around her; she needed love right now, but not the kind he was daydreaming about.
She needs comfort right now, not me making things weird. It's not fair for me to think of her like that right now. I have friends here in Mineral Town, and I need to be one that she can rely on.
Not absorbed in my own interests...
A chill ran through him once again and he was quick to block it out.
"I just wish the amount of effort I put into our relationship would've been worth... something. I really don't know anything about him."
Cliff's mouth opened in reply, but he closed it before unwanted words slipped out.
Gray said she got upset when he told her he didn't dislike her. Don't remind her of that.
He thought of the own time his heart had been shattered and closed his eyes, reflecting as he struggled to give his feelings words. While he wanted to make her pain disappear, he figured that sharing a lesson he learned the hard way might help.
"Wishing for a reality where your heart gets everything it desires only hurts more."
Claire gave him a raised brow as she bit her lip.
How could he possibly understand what I'm feeling?
She focused on his earnest eyes and her facial features instinctively relaxed before she was washed over with a wave of sadness. While she had seen him on several occasions looking serious, pensive, sad, and brooding, she had never seen such misery in his eyes before – not even on Ivy's birthday.
"It just reminds you of what you don't have... what you can't have." His melancholy voice was carried off with the waves. He had meant to keep the focus on Claire's situation, but memories began flooding his mind.
He felt his heart jump into his throat when Claire rested her head on his shoulder and put an arm around his waist. She had picked up on the sense of experience from his words. "Cliff... who broke your heart?"
Emotions surged through him – longing, desperation, hope. He ached to tell someone other than Carter his story. The urge to tell Claire the truth was steadily growing as he got to know her better, but he hesitated. Not only was that an issue to bring up another day, but the thought of her no longer wanting his friendship terrified him.
Her eyes reflected genuine concern and interest.
Maybe I'm being selfish not telling her everything right now... Another time,,, even if you always say that.
His focus turned back toward Claire, whose eyebrows were furrowed as she awaited a reply.
"I... I broke my own, really... And that's the pathetic part," he confessed, shrinking back. He moved his gaze to the sand and hung his head in shame. Garnering pity wasn't his goal, and he silently prayed that she wouldn't press further.
Mulling his words over in her head, she leaned into him a little more. He was speaking in riddles, but there was likely a reason for being so vague. Still, she felt a lump form in her throat as she manage to blink away the mistiness in her eyes. She turned to face him and hugged him around the neck. They stood like that in silence for a moment as she gathered herself. "I wish you never have to hurt, Cliff," she choked out, squeezing her eyes shut.
She felt a strong hug around her waist. "I wish the same thing for you, too."
They listened to the summer breeze dancing on the waves. The colors of the sunset streaked across the sky, highlighting clouds bursting with warm, cozy hues. The calls of the gulls over the water meshed with the sounds of water and the beat of music inside, punctuated with indistinguishable chatter and laughter from the party.
"Then let's allow ourselves to be happy," she murmured into his shoulder, her long locks tickling his arm.
Allow ourselves to be happy...?
His heart pounded in his chest to violently that he struggled to breathe – this was all happening so fast, after all. While the Lomi Lomi salmon had been delicious, he regretted eating raw onions and smoked fish before such an intimate moment.
Will she be able to tell I've never kissed before? I don't think dreams really count as real experience...
His palms began to sweat as he moved in a little closer.
What about her knowing the truth about me? That's going to make things complicated...
He felt her hips gently sway to the beat of the music and she let out a soft giggle that he wasn't sure if it was flirtatious or not.
Dancing?
His eyes focused on her lips. "Allowing ourselves to be happy..." He tried the mantra out loud.
Claire gave an emphatic nod. "Yeah. Telling ourselves it's okay to move on – that we deserve to. And... to enjoy what we have now." A slight smile played at her lips. "It's like you said earlier... we can look after each other. Sharing what we have now... I can't thank you enough."
She pulled him into a hug, and Cliff battled with a combination of relief and yearning. His argument with Ann was still fresh in his mind. "Claire, I'm not sure if you should be thanking me yet. I have to tell you... a lot of the meat that I keep for myself... it's not stuff that I can sell to Doug or Won. And... well, you saw how upset it makes Ann. She came back early when I was delivering a package of rabbit to Doug the other day. I wouldn't dare tell her about the things that I end up eating. I eat what I can catch, and sometimes that includes squirrels, possums, woodchucks – whatever I can get a hold of. I can't really afford to be picky right now. Are you really alright with eating those kinds of things?"
He didn't wait for her to answer.
"Because Ann's response is what I get most of the time from people who don't grow up in hunting communities. It can be hard for some people to see someone eat something you consider cute, or even as a pet."
He didn't realize that his voice was racing until her hand gently rested on his shoulder.
"It's like I said before when I watched you out hunting with Cain – you're gathering resources. And... you respect the animals and thank them for what they provide. You don't waste things. I respect that, Cliff."
His hand landed at her waist as he took her free hand his. They swayed gently to the beat of the music echoing from inside the beach shack.
"I eat my blemished produce, and any of it that's inedible goes to the compost heap to make mulch to feed new plants. Sticks and weeds become campfire fodder to cook food. I've been trying to do the best I can with what I have, just like you. I'd be honored to share with you, and... well, I'd be really tickled to combine what we have." She paused, looking around them conspiratorially before leaning in close.
"Can we try something?"
Cliff blinked, his heart hammering in his throat. He managed an overenthusiastic nod as he moved closer.
"It's like this," Claire explained, letting to of his hand and taking a step backward. He moved with her and she let out a giggle. "No, you stay there!"
She couldn't help but grin at his confused look as she placed her hands on his shoulders at arms' length. "Alright. Now put your hands on my hips."
He complied, looking at her with a questioning tilt to his head. "Alright, on your hips...?"
She squirmed, wondering if steam was coming out of her ears. "Waist! I meant waist!" she corrected herself with a sharp laugh laced with embarrassment.
Some people at my high school would put their hands even lower...
She hoped he didn't hear her gulp as he swiftly moved his hands where she wanted them.
"And what kind of dance is this?" Cliff shook his head at the sheer absurdity as Claire slowly but clunkily shifted her stance from one foot to the other.
"An awkward slow dance with chaperones present!" Claire giggled. "Just like my teenage days at school dances.. I-I just wanted to try it with you and see what it was like..."
Cliff hoped she couldn't see his blazing cheeks. "And... how would you rate it?"
Claire's lips curled up into an impish smile. "Awkward... but that's only because I know there are much more comfortable ways to dance with you!" she tripped over her words.
He pulled her in by the waist and she let out a shriek of delight, her face burning. Her arms snaked around his neck and their eyes met as their bodies were flush with one another.
This is more of a hug than anything else...
"Is this better?" His voice was gentle in her ear and initiated a wave of goosebumps to travel up her bare arms.
"Uh-huh..." She nodded dumbly, wondering if she looked as ridiculous as she felt she did. Her heart gave a funny jolt when she realized their eyes had been locked for some time. Glee filled her and she felt an urge to jump and laugh and sing. She let go of his shoulders and took a few steps backward, spinning on the ball of her foot, her hair and dress fanning out around her.
She was illuminated by the setting sun over the waves and Cliff simply drank her in with his eyes, marveling in the way the sun lit up her golden locks like a halo. She hopped from foot to foot, soaking in the last rays as the sun twinkled goodbye.
"Are you having fun?"
She could hear the smile in his voice without even looking.
Her worries forgotten, she couldn't remember the last time her heart felt so...
Free.
She clasped her hands in front of her, twirling with an eager nod. "Lots!"
"That's great. It makes me happy to see you smile." His eyes quickly focused back up on her twinkling eyes and he was grateful that the poor lighting from the sunset hid how red he knew his face was.
Claire bobbed her head again, giddy. She confidently took a small step closer to him and was suddenly aware that she had been holding her shoulders and forearms close to her body in order to enhance a couple of her more... feminine features in order to attract his eyes, and it had been more than successful. It was a new behavior for her, and she found herself wanting to continue, vaguely remembering that he was an attractive man at a common age for seeking a partner. The thought lingered in her mind and she wasn't sure how to process it just yet. She adjusted the lei on her head and did the same for him, her fingertips grazing the vibrant leaves.
"Me, too..." She didn't realize she had begun playing with a strand of her hair.
He couldn't stand it anymore. "Claire, you're so pretty," he gushed dreamily as he stared at her, starry-eyed, his frustrations about Gray forgotten about the moment. "Not just physically, either... you're... gorgeous."
Her heart hammered in her ears. "I could say the same about you, though. Gorgeous, kind, and amazing." She softly stroked his arm and realized with a drunken haziness that she was openly flirting with him. She wanted to see that warm smile directed at her. She felt his hand tenderly rest at her waist and she looked out at the waves as they continued to dance on the beach.
Does his touch always feel this loving?
Is he flirting, too? He really seems to like the attention I'm giving him... Does he notice I'm trying to get him to look at me?
She gulped.
Is this really okay? I was just upset over Gray. What do I really want?
Her eyes traced the curve of his lips and she let out a tiny gasp at her own impulses.
"Is everything alright?"
She nodded. "I'm... happy." Her heart was so light and full all at once. She wasn't sure what kind of word to give this feeling, but it was so unfamiliar and natural to her all at once. "How about you?"
"Same." He gave her a warm grin and found himself nuzzling the crook of her neck before he could stop himself. She smelled of lavender, sweet cut grass, and tomato plants. The smell was intoxicating to him, and before he had a chance to scold himself for being so forward, he felt her soft touch cradle the base of his skull. Something about this intimacy felt so intuitive; he stopped panicking at how she'd react, what he should say, or even how far they were going to take this. The moment was perfect and he was completely at peace, his heart bursting with pure bliss.
Claire let out a contented sigh into his hair. Endearing, adorable, loving – these words bounced in her head. They slowly swayed to the muffled music and a particularly loud wave broke her trance.
Wh-what are we doing?
Is this really only dancing? This feels so intimate... Is it okay for me to dance this way with Cliff?
Is it okay for me to think this way about him?
I mean, how does he even feel about this?
Why isn't he talking?
Did I make things awkward somehow without realizing it?
Ack, why am I suddenly thinking about his lips on my collarbone?!
Their earlier mantra came to mind, slowing down her racing thoughts.
Let's allow ourselves to be happy...
She gulped.
Well, what is happiness anyway? Is it what I'm feeling now? Or is it something bigger than all of that?
Cliff softly exhaled into the crook of her neck and a shiver of pleasure ran through her body. She rested her eyes as she stroked his hair, focusing on the soothing quality and comfort it brought. A warm glow started in her belly and spread through her whole being. Intoxicated on the feeling, she decided to pursue it a bit further. She held him tighter and he quickly returned the favor, lifting his head to give her an affectionate smile.
He had never looked so elated.
"There are lots of things to be happy about if we really let ourselves enjoy life. I can't claim to be an expert on it myself, but well... I think it's worth trying to follow."
Claire looked down at their feet.
How long ago did we stop dancing?
Her lips turned up into a grin. "You're right."
They heard sudden laughter, whoops, and hollers from inside.
"Sounds like something is going on in there. Wanna check it out?"
She gave one last look out to the waves. The water had darkened, and the sky had grown to a deep purple hue, the stars more visible as they came out to play.
"Yeah!"
As they headed back to the shack, she shyly reached for his arm and quickly retracted her hand before she thought he noticed. Cliff was more observant than she thought, however. They walked across the sand together, the dark sky hiding the blush in their cheeks.
Author's Note: I got to play out a few of my head canons in this chapter. I know someone mentioned in an earlier review that they could imagine Manna doing tarot readings. I already had this scene planned, so that made me really happy, haha! I also like to think that Rick is named after his father. Rod + Rick = Roderick. Just a little sentimental snippet in there. FYI, the surname Lockard means protector, which I thought suited this family well. I also like to think that Harris is a little bit older than most of the marriage candidates by about 5-10 years (I'm imagining him in his early thirties) and doesn't have all that many people to socialize with in town, so while he's not shy, he's not exactly a social butterfly.
I'd like to thank you all again for taking the time to read and provide your input on my work. I really put a lot of hours (read: days, weeks, months – actually I started drafting this over a year ago!) into this story and it truly makes me happy to see that others are getting enjoyment out of it. Y'all are the best!