The Suit.
By: Ryushi Nigami
Disclaimer: I own Naruto. And if you believed that, I've got a bridge to sell you.
A/N: the inspiration for this came when I was thinking about Rude (from Final Fantasy VII) and his suit. And so that got me thinking about what might happen if other people had a suit like that and the cool glasses to go with it. Therefore, here we are. It may or may not be a one shot, depending on my inspiration.
Chapter the first: Naruto's new suit.
Naruto was walking through the streets in his normal, orange jumpsuit one fine Konoha day munching on some Pocky. As usual, the villigars were glaring at him and moving out of his way when he passed, but he didn't notice. He was in Pocky heaven.
'Mmm…I can't believe I didn't know about this delectable treat.' He thought. 'If Ramen is the perfect meal, then Pocky must certainly be the perfect dessert and snack. It's so delicious. So delectable, palatable, even. The creamy outer shell of flavor, the crunchy biscuit beneath, the easy access package. It's all so, so…'
"Perfect for you?" A shopman in a dark shirt with some strange language on it and wearing khaki cargoes asked unexpectedly.
Naruto answered without thinking. "Yeah, perfect."
"Then it's yours."
Naruto blinked as a box was shoved into his unexpecting arms. He nearly dropped it but his reflexes kicked in and he caught it. "What the hell is this?"
The shopman grinned. "Don't worry about a charge, kid. I could tell you needed a new wardrobe and the last guy who had such bad fashion sense looked killer in this."
"But…" Naruto looked down at the box. "But thi-" He cut himself off as he noticed the shopman (and his shop) were gone. "Eh? Where did he go?"
Naruto looked around that area for a bit, confused, before he finally gave up and turned back towards his apartment, carrying his new acquisition and still happily munching on Pocky.
When Naruto finally got back to his apartment, he took care of the most important thing first: lunch. After downing two cups of Instant Ramen, he finally turned his attention to the strange box he had been handed.
"Now, let's see what's in this box."
At that, he put his hands together in the Ram seal and yelled favorite jutsu. "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" When the smoke from the somewhat-summon cleared, he found himself staring at two Bunshin. 'Hmm…must have put too much chakra into it this time. Eh.' Out loud he said, "Okay, I need one of you to stand guard outside the door while I go outside. The other one will open the package once I say go."
The two clones nodded and went to their positions. Naruto jumped out the window and ran a good distance away. "ALRIGHT, GO!" he yelled at the top of his lungs, causing some people to wince. After waiting for a few minutes and not hearing an explosion, he raced back to his apartment. The bunshin outside his door gave a thumbs-up, which Naruto nodded at.
Walking inside, Naruto found that the other bunshin had ducked and covered in his room after making another bunshin to open the box. The other bunshin had made yet another bunshin and was sheepishly standing up behind its hastily constructed shield of pillows. Naruto's eyebrow nearly hit his hairline when he found that the last bunshin had created a pulley system to pull the top off the box and had hidden outside, hanging under the window ledge to activate it. It had, however, forgotten about the lower ledge's tendency to break when faced with a weight larger then a cat. The ledge had summarily broken, sending the bunshin to its earthly doom. However, the box was finally opened.
Looking into the box, Naruto gasped. It was a suit! And there was a pair of sunglasses to go with it! To top it all off, the black tie was already tied in a Double Windsor. "Thank you, mysterious shopman!"
In another dimension, the shopman sneezed and looked over his shoulder, rubbing his nose as he smiled.
His traveling partner looked back at him in concern. "Are you alright, Nigami-nii-san?"
Ryushi Nigami (or, as it would be written in the West, Nigami Ryushi) grinned. "Never better, nee-chan. In fact, I think I just did my good deed for the week."
His sister rolled her eyes and continued down the dimensional path. "You're strange, nii-san."
Down at the bridge where they always met for team meetings, two thirds of Team 7 were there and waiting.
"Why is Kakashi-sensei always so late!" Sakura said angrily. "And where's Naruto? He's usually here by now." (Inner Sakura: Grrrr! I'll kill them both in their sleep!)
Sasuke looked up from his favorite angst spot on the ground. "Hn…"
Suddenly a blonde man in a black suit wearing sunglasses walked up and greeted them cheerily. "Yo, Sakura-chan, Sasuke-teme! What's up? Where's Kakashi-sensei?"
Sakura stared at the newcomer in shock. "Wha-! Who the heck are you? (Inner Sakura: …You yummy morsel of manliness.)
Sasuke just glared in the newcomer's general direction.
The man in the black suit simply grinned and replied, "Don't you recognize Konoha's #1 most surprising maverick ninja? It's me, Uzumaki Naruto."
Now Sakura was glaring at him. "Naaaaruuutooooo…"
Naruto blinked behind his sunglasses and sweatdropped. "What? What'd I do?"
A second later, Naruto found himself six feet under in a Naruto-shaped crater with a large lump on his head. "…Itaaaiii…"
Sakura was standing over the crater panting. "THAT'S FOR HAVING THE NERVE TO LOOK COOLER THEN SASUKE-KUN!"
Sasuke's eye twitched. 'No way. She thought the dobe looked cooler than me in that suit?'
Naruto crawled out of the hole, rubbing his head. Amazingly, his suit didn't have a speck of dust on it. AS if to make up for it, though, his cool shades were shattered. "Aww, man, you broke my sunglasses! Oh well." At that he reached into his inner pocket dimension and pulled out another pair that looked exactly like the ones he had before. In one smooth motion, he snapped them open with a flick of a wrist and put them on. "Whoa. That was the first time I ever got the cool wrist snap thing down….Uh oh."
The 'uh oh' was because Sakura was glaring at him again.
Sasuke chuckled darkly. "You better start running, dobe. I don't think she'll give you that second you had earlier."
As if in a self fulfilling prophecy, Sakura summoned a chakra construct of a giant hammer in her rage and smiled sweetly. Naruto began backing away quickly. And so the chase began, Sakura still smiling and swinging that hammer at Naruto and Naruto screaming, running for his life, and dodging every blow by millimeters. Sasuke, of course, was watching with disinterest when Kakashi finally showed up.
Kakashi, in turn, watched for a few seconds before sweatdropping. "Do I even want to know?"
Hey! That's the end of this chapter! Please review.