A/N: Since I'm such a nice, wonderful, amazing person, I decided to update my stories instead of using the rare free time I have to draw or binge some anime. I deserve a medal. Especially with how I let you plebians bask in my brilliance. I WANT A SHINY MEDAL.

MADE OF CHOCOLATE.

"Stabbing into me are those 'Give me more's (Give me more)
Give me more (Give me more)
My heart beats fast, it's a lethal dose
So please just be quiet (quiet)
Quiet (quiet）
We're just gonna look at each other?"

PLATONIC GIRL - MikitoP (covered by かんせる (Kanseru))

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'Kiss AU with Kung Food?'

~(x)~

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It starts off with Marinette begging Adrien to stay with her when her uncle comes over (a few days before the event), asking him to help her cram some more Mandarin in her brain because she doesn't want to make a fool out of herself and wanted to impress the man since he's a world-famous chef. Her mother offered to help, also giving her daughter a cheeky "I told you so" for all those times the girl kept rejecting the opportunities to learn in the past but Marinette didn't want to burden her and was quite stubborn.

"Maman! I was always so busy back then so how could I have studied Mandarin at the same time!? English and French are hard enough and they use the same symbols!"

"Oh really? Your cousin Bridgette from London has already mastered all three of the languages and is learning Japanese as we speak. And isn't our lovely Tuyet's son fluent in Vietnamese? I heard that he's been sending letters to their family back home-"

"Bridgette doesn't count because she loves studying languages and recently has become a weeb, thinking it'll impress some weird guy she likes that has a name that sounds like vanilla! And while Kim is all great and wonderful in his language, he's failing both English and French! I at least know some Shanghainese and a few basic phrases in Mandarin!"

"Marinette. Insults do not count."

"B-B-But-"

"No."

"Boo..."

Of course, Adrien helps out without a beat, extremely excited to not only meet his potential in-law but also to spend the day with the love of his life. Though, the sweets were a great bonus.

"You didn't need to go as low as bribing me with macarons, Bug. I'd have helped regardless. But thanks for the treats anyways!"

"Oh- really? That was easy."

"Of course~ You know that I would do anything for you, ma chérie,"

"S-Sure..."

Marinette realises that she's an absolute fool whilst the boy happily inhales the sweets, muttering something along the lines with "Of course there's no need to bribe him, this idiot would jump off the Eiffel Tower if I simply asked him to..."

So, the chef finally arrived at Mari's humble abode~ However, due to her nerves and trying too hard, Marinette stammers all over the place, butchering some of the lines and phrases and couldn't help but be in a slump till they reached the hotel. She isn't aware that Cheng Shifu actually adores her already, practically wanting to adopt her on the spot and much to Adrien's embarrassment and delight, gave the boy his blessings to marry his niece.

Things pretty much go similarly to canon except Adrien and Marinette gives Chloé a much more harsh and deserving scolding, especially from the former.

"Why are you like this, Chlo'? You never used to be so mean...and so horrible...where did my childhood friend go?" Adrien's pointed glare then changed into a disappointed frown, as if all his energy seeped out of his frame, making the blonde girl genuinely regret her actions for once.

She almost took a step back, frazzled by the discontent emeralds that were glowering at her. The sight of her nemesis' face snapped Chloé out of her stupor and a disgusted snarl replaced her deer-in-the-headlights demeanour. Not wanting to give either of them the satisfaction, the mayor's daughter stormed away, pure spite and pettiness fueling her for the actions to come.

"This is turning out to be a pretty crappy day, I'm so sorry for that Adrien..." Marinette was snapped out of her melancholic spiral when a hand playfully chopped itself against her head, a little "Eeep!" escaping her mouth.

"What did I say about apologising for things that aren't your fault? It's usually you telling me off for doing something stupid, not me. It's weird!" Adrien knocked his hips against hers with a chuckle, earning a knockback and placed his hand on her waist casually, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"I guess?" The dark-haired girl giggled, trying not to dwell on the way his touch was affecting her in the best ways possible. "I'll never get her grudge against me. What did I do? Take the last cookie in the canteen back when we were six?"

Adrien then wrapped his arm around hers, leading them away in a random direction, acting like he's some sort of a butler escorting his fine Lady to a castle.

"Ah I don't know...must totally not have anything do with how kind you are, how insanely talented you are, how your heart is bigger than the whole planet, how crazily smart and beautiful who are-" He was cut off by a good-natured jab against his stomach, bursting out laughing again.

"Stop, you flirt!" Her snickers only fuelled him on further which earnt him a few dozen eye rolls or so.

"I'm serious! Even Père keeps pestering us about getting you into the modelling industry! You would rock the whole world and have everyone swooning with one wink."

"I am a baker's daughter; I cannot survive on fruit and veggies all my life without dying from the lack of sugar."

"Well, there is one kind of sugar that won't be deprived of you," Adrien brought them to a halt, snaking his hands around her waist to tug her closer, letting himself shamelessly flicker his gaze from her sakura tinted lips to her awestruck sky blues, his mouth twisted in a Cheshire smirk. His entire being filled with pure glee when a strawberry hue started to spread from the tips of her cheekbones to the base of her neck.

"You flirt!" Marinette flipped her head to the side with a scoff, crossing her arms in defiance. She was beckoned back into facing him again when the model leaned into her space, smiling as wide as his alter ego. "You keep up with the teasing and I'll never kiss you again,"

"Oh dear~ You're going to deprive Paris of their favourite husband and wife, saving them from le Papillon's latest villain?"

"Ha! Do I need to remind you that we're not married?" Her retort only egged her silly partner on and his smile turned mischievously wicked.

"Then why was that the first thing you blurted out when Alya asked for info? Hmm?" Their noses were touching at this rate but desperate anticipation filled their chests for each others' answers.

Instead, Marinette lightly smushed Adrien's cheeks with her hands, shaking her head.

"Don't you know that curiosity kills the cat?" She winked slyly and then skipped out of Adrien's hold, making way to the tasting room. Her cackles snapped the boy out of his daze, making him run after her with hopes that his blush died down.

"But satisfaction brought it back! Marinette! You can't just leave it that!"

He never got the answer to that question on that day.

So, Shifu gets akumatised, kidnapping a screaming Chloé in the process, leaving Marinette and Adrien to hide and transform within the building. During their sweet, sweet kiss, Ladybug is first to pull away, commenting on how Chat Noir tastes like sugar, earning an eyebrow wiggle from him.

"Want another taste~?"

"Don't be silly- we need to go save your friend before the akuma turns her into soup!"

"That's not a no~~~"

The battle is just as epic and cool as ever, with extra badassery from how incredibly sync the duo is and an increase of Chat's insufferable puns. They do have that iconic moment towards the end where their eyes just meet as Ladybug runs off before her transformation is up. We end with Marinette finding out that Shifu can indeed speak some French after all, along with the few Chinese dialects that she knows.

As revenge, Marinette gets Shifu to babble about Adrien, the poor boy begging to know what they're saying since he only knows textbook Mandarin. We get the Marinette soup too and honestly, both idiot one and two treated it as a date.

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~(x)~

A/N: Next chapter will be a summary of Volpina sooooo if you want it quickly...comment ;)))))))