A/N: There is supposed to be smut in this chapter. I can't share it on FFN. If you'd like to read it, it's on AO3. Anyway, here are the parts that weren't smut, so you at least get some important bits! The break in the middle of the chapters is where the smut happens.

The sun rose, blooming golden across the horizon; it spread from the window panes, spilled across the slatted wooden floor to the messy bed sheets and the two disheveled people occupying it. Opening her eyes to the light, Amaryllis stared up at the sloped ceiling, dazed, until the soft snores of the man beside her caused her to turn.

She watched him. Well, stared. She was exhausted. Though she had slept far deeper than she had in... weeks, it seemed, it hadn't been enough. But it would have to do. Belatedly, she wondered if Ellana had finally awoken. If Solas still watched over her, as he had promised he would. It was a strange feeling-the calm. Amaryllis knew she should be worried, anxious, should have run back to her sister the night before, should have never agreed to spend time with a friend, should have never made a friend, should have...

No matter what the promise was she had made, would Mihris have wanted this for her?

Amaryllis closed her eyes tightly and wished the thought away. No, this was her punishment, to deny her of anything but protecting the one person she had promised to. It didn't matter what she wanted, or how she felt. This was her atonement. This was what she had been brought to Thedas for. A part of her knew this-that the Creators, the Maker, whichever was real, had brought her here to protect her sister, to keep her safe, to deliver her, unharmed, to the Conclave. Because Ellana had a bigger part to play in this world than Amaryllis ever would. Maybe Mihris had known this. Maybe he had seen how much Amaryllis had needed this, too, because without Ellana...

Without Ellana...

Emil grunted beside her, his lips curling into a frown. Whatever dream he was having didn't seem as if it were going very well. So she curled to her side, took one lingering look at his furrowed brow, and dug her fingertips into his ribs.

He groaned, batting her hands away, so she tried again. Stabbing him with her fingertips she then brought her feet up, pressed them into his hip, and shoved.

Emil woke with a yelp, catching himself on the side of the bed before he fell flat to the floor, face first. He blinked, stunned, then turned to her and growled, his voice rough with sleep, "Yer in for it today, Lis. For all that I did for ye last night, this is how ye repay me? A foot in my arse?"

"My foot is nowhere near your ass!"

He grumbled something she couldn't hear, so she shoved him again, but this time he was prepared. Rolling quickly, he grabbed onto her foot and yanked, dragging her across the bed with him. She squealed as he hovered dangerously close to the very edge of the mattress.

Laughter burst from them both, warming the space between them. Amaryllis sat up, hunching over so that she wouldn't hit her head on the low section of the ceiling above her. Her friend rolled back to where he had been before, bringing himself to rest against her now crossed legs.

He blinked up at her owlishly. She stared down at him, observed his dark stubble, the way his front teeth poked out ever so slightly, digging into his bottom lip; his apple green eyes squinted with mischief.

She kissed him. It was a quick, soft press of lips, so soft in fact the brush of them felt more like a whisper-the way a gentle breeze swept across your eyelashes or the way someone's breath fanned faintly against your neck. Amaryllis pulled back with a smile.

Emil watched her go, something dark in his gaze. His eyes darted to her lips, to where they spread across her teeth in joy, and his expression loosened. He smiled, too. Seeing that, Amaryllis leaned down and pressed her lips to his once more. This time, he pressed back, insistent, one hand cupping her cheek, encouraging her to tilt and open herself up further. His lips were soft and slick; the taste of last night's ale on his tongue. She didn't mind it.

His tongue stroked hers, slow, causing this static to rise in her, crackling pleasantly along her fingers as she gently scraped the stubble along his chin. Emil groaned into her mouth, the sound reverberating through her jaw, down to her chest, fueling the growing heat pooling inside of her.

She wanted to scream. She wanted to bite down on his tongue, to push him down, to have her way with him; to take what she wanted, and give him what he needed in return. Amaryllis moved faster against him, groaning as that heat continued to build. Her lips felt scorched, numb, rubbed raw by the stubble surrounding his mouth, and she loved it. Wanted more.

"Lis," he panted as he pulled back. "Are ye sure?"

She laughed, a sound of pure, unadulterated pleasure, and closed her eyes in bliss. Emil pulled her shirt back down, ever the gentleman, while Amaryllis fought to steady her breathing.

"I never knew it'd be like this," she said. He paused, blinking down at her for a moment.

"What?"

"Well, I knew it would be good, but I didn't know that it would be this good."

He grinned salaciously. "'Course it was." Then his brows furrowed, and he cocked his head to the side, staring into her eyes. "Though, I've gotta ask-have ye never done this before?"

"I've touched myself," she admitted. "More times than I can count. But I've never done it with another person."

His brow furrowed further. He turned to look out the window, his expression pensive. "I'd thought..."

"It wasn't for lack of trying," Amaryllis said with a grin and a shrug. "There weren't many others of a similar age in our clan, and those that were were too much like siblings for us to ever think about touching. There had been opportunities when we had encountered other clans but..." she frowned then. "Sex is for pleasure, for release, for fun-that's how it is for us. The Dalish, I mean. But I was an outlier. When we would encounter other clans, our Keeper would usually have me hide or ask me to keep myself scarce."

"It wasn't that she was ashamed of me!"Amaryllis reassured him. "No, she never was. She would fight for me when the need arose. There had been a time after I had joined them... the first time we had met with another clan. They had too many mages and needed to find a clan that would take in one of theirs, but our clan already had three. When they realized I was one of the three, they were... angry, to say the least."

"After that, our Keeper just hadn't wanted to risk it." The Dalish were against interspecies relationships, anyway, but that didn't seem necessary to admit at the moment.

Warm sunlight spilled from the window panes; she could feel its comforting heat spreading across her lap. Emil laid back against the bed. His hair was mussed endearingly. A part of her wanted to ruffle it further, and so she did, leaning into his space to run a hand through it. He smiled softly.

"My first kiss'd been with Florian," he said. "The first time I'd done this'd been with Florian."

Her heart ached at his confession and the bittersweet, sorrowful twist in his expression. Leaning in, she brought him close, holding him against her chest tightly. He wrapped her up in his arms without hesitation. There, in a borrowed tavern room, on a borrowed bed, they held each other, basking in the warmth of their shared embrace.

Emil pulled back, his expression full of mirth, and said, "goin' to pull yer breeches up any time soon?"

"Oh," Amaryllis gasped, then began to laugh. "Why, tired of the view?"

"No," he scoffed. "Don't think any sane person in existence could be. But I can't stay here all day staring at your bare arse. We've both got somewhere to be."

She nodded. "Right," she said. "I've got to check on Ellana." Amaryllis stood and quickly reached for her cloak where it hung from a hook on the back of the narrow door. Turning to look back at him, she asked, "I'll see you soon? It doesn't—doesn't have to be for this, but, I would like to see you again soon."

I can have a friend, she reassured herself. Babae would have wanted me to make friends. Right?

Emil smiled roguishly. "Oh, I get it, I was a terrible lay, wasn't I? No need to pretend, miss. I can take it."

"Shut up." Amaryllis rolled her eyes. Donning her cloak, she clicked the clasp into place, and said with a smirk, "Besides, you were… adequate. Better luck next time?"

She left the tavern with a smile and the sound of Emil's answering cackle ringing in her ears.