Title A day in the life of Mr. Creepy Pants.
Author The Lady Fuchsia
Set The day of the Slytherins v Griffindore match year 1
Disclaimer Yes I do own Harry Potter, oh wait that was a dream I once I had.
Note This is my first ff… constructive criticism please chaps… Enjoy
'Ah, Saturday Slytherins first game of the season' he thought as he climbed out of bed and moved into the bathroom. He looked lovingly at his vast array of hair care products.
'Today is going to be the first day of the rest of my life, no more Mr. Creepy pants' he applied a liberal amount of shaving foam, 'Maybe introduce some colour into my wardrobe? Maybe finally agree to go to one of Hagrid's poker nights? Maybe donate ten percent of my wages to orphans?'
"Bugger!" he said as he saw the crimson splatter onto the sink "I do hope that's not a bad omen". He splashed his face with water.
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'Maybe I should lay off the potter boy? I mean was has the little scamp hasn't done anything to me? Yes, yes James tried to kill me 'an all but, well it's surely its time to let bygones be bygones?'
He ruffled Neville's hair as he passed him in the corridor ' Yes, Griffindor's are people too'
"Tell me Neville how are you settling in?" he said in a jovial tone 'Is that a smile' he thought as he twisted his mouth, 'should've practiced this in the mirror. Christ the kid looks like he's going to cry, this going to be harder than I thought'
"Yes, well, Keep up the good work", he said moving away as quick as humanly possible.
The sun felt good as it hit is face, the stroll to the quidditch field was a pleasant one 'Perhaps being out of the castle more would improve my complexion'
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Why did Dumbledore have to sit him this close to Quirell?
"Hey Quirrell What crawled into your turban and died?" he said without thinking
"I'm Ssssssorry Sssssseverus?", he said quietly
"I said 'When I watched Bambi I cried'", He said internally complementing him self on his quick thinking. New Day, new Sevvie.
'Well the Potter boy, does fly well', he mused ' duck, weave, dive, in, out, shake it about, wait he appears to be shaking rather a lot, good gravy! The brooms been cursed!'
'Counter, counter, counter, counter, dear God what's that smell? Chestnuts? Toast? Aunt Sally's cooking? FIRE! My robes my beautiful, beautiful robes!" He pushed Quirell violently into the rows below.
"You clumsy barstard!" he shouted at down to him "Always keep your wand locked in the neutral position!" He started to give him a good kicking and was pulled back by Dumbledore and Sprout. 'What was I thinking! I am the Hogwarts bad ass, I am universally feared and hated, I am Snape the Potions Master, feel my wrath!'
………
Severus Snape was sitting in his office drinking tea and nibbling the occasional biscuit. He thumbed through a pile of essays on his desk until he spotted ' Harry Potter'. He scrawled a spikey black D into the corner without reading it and smirked, leant back in his chair pleased with a job well done.