As Shelby drove to the Lima Bean to meet Hiram and Leroy, she thought about the past thirteen years of her life. She wouldn't go so far to say that she's been unhappy. In fact, she's found a lot joy and even more success in her life since she gave up Rachel.
After Shelby moved to New York, she quickly got to work. She took part-time jobs tutoring high school students in English and waitressing at a diner. Every other free time she had was spent taking any classes or workshops that she could afford, rehearsing, and auditioning. A few months into her hustle, she caught a break and got cast as a swing in the company of a new rock musical called "Rent." It was wildly successful and went on to win the Tony that year. After a year of being in the chorus, the producers, who took a liking with Shelby's drive and work ethic, asked her if she was interested in being the standby for the role of Maureen in the musical's first national tour. Shelby quickly agreed and spent the next thirteen months impressing audiences across the country every time she was lucky enough to be on stage. After "Rent," Shelby played a few off-Broadway roles until one of her friends told her about a casting call for a new musical about the life and times of the Wicked Witch of the West. At first she wasn't interested, but after remembering all of the times she watched "The Wizard of Oz" while she was pregnant with Rachel and recalling how the music seemed to soothe the baby in her stomach, Shelby found herself auditioning.
After making it through several rounds of auditions and callbacks, everyone on the casting and creative team fell in love with Shelby's powerful voice, serious acting skills, and contagious energy and charm. The further along she got through the audition process, the more excited the young actress got. Everything seemed lined up for Shelby to get the lead role of Elphaba. However, in the eleventh hour, the director and producers decided to go with a different actress, concerned that Shelby didn't have the experience to carry the show on Broadway. Instead, they offered her the standby role for Elphaba. Shelby was devastated but still accepted already feeling so connected and invested in the new musical after reading for the role in all of the developmental workshops. A couple weeks into the pre-Broadway run in San Francisco, Shelby had been blowing away audiences while stepping in for the lead actress who was out of town. At the end of one of the shows, the producers called Shelby in to meet with them. Apparently, the lead they chose over her decided to leave the show to pursue another opportunity and they are now offering her the principal role. Shelby quickly acquiesced, knowing full well that her life was about to change for good.
Shelby's run as the first green girl in "Wicked" was a soaring success that culminated with a Tony Award for Best Performance by a Leading Actress in a Musical. After two years of dedicating her life to the musical that gave her her big break, Shelby bowed out after leading the hit show eight-times-a-week on Broadway. Feeling the burn out of grinding in the theater day-after-day, Shelby took a break for the first time in more than five years. Truth be told, the busier she was, the less time she had to think about Rachel. It's not that she was trying to forget her daughter, she couldn't. But it's just that every time she did, she felt the cracks in her heart ready to open up and swallow her whole.
Despite her critically-acclaimed performance in "Wicked," Shelby was by no-means a household name. Although she wasn't on the radio or starred in any Hollywood movies, she had achieved a very respectable level of fame and was a Broadway star in her own right. She was also notoriously known for being extremely private, much to the chagrin of her publicist. Although her overall goal was to keep her worlds separate; in reality, Shelby also wanted to protect Rachel. She didn't want anyone finding out about her daughter and using her or the past against her. Maybe in part that's why she also decided to shift gears and started teaching, to pursue a more lowkey lifestyle.
Following her success in "Wicked," she was asked to teach musical theater students as an adjunct professor at her alma mater at NYU. Realizing that she also loved helping students find their voice and passion, she decided to go back to school to get her education degree. After finishing up her Master's and wanting to get a singing fix in before she started teaching full-time, she began a concert tour, performing with symphonies across the country. On one of her last stops on tour, a school principal approached Shelby after her show in Columbus, Ohio with a very lucrative job offer to teach English and coach show choir at Carmel, a high school in an affluent suburb right outside of her hometown of Lima.
Shelby's first inclination was to reject it. She had built her life and career in New York. Apart from Rachel, the city had been one of the only great loves of her life. But she didn't have her family. Sure, Shelby had made incredible friends there but it wasn't the same. Although her parents and sister visited her in New York whenever they could and have flown all around the country to see her perform throughout the years, Shelby kept her distance and hasn't been back to her hometown since she was pregnant. However, it's been a few years and Shelby knew from the last update she received that the Berry men had moved their family to Chicago after Leroy accepted a teaching job at Northwestern University.
Knowing that she needed to move on, she finally told her family about Rachel. They were heartbroken for Shelby but understood and accepted her reasons for why she did it. Her dad, especially, was incredibly touched at the sacrifice his daughter made for him. They encouraged Shelby to move back home so they can help her begin to heal after years of repressing all of the painful emotions and heartache she felt. Shelby agreed knowing that she needed balance and needed to let herself process everything in a healthy way with the support of her family before she got to the end of her life with only trophies lined on her shelf and theater credits under her name to show for it.
And that's how Shelby found herself teaching at Carmel High School and coaching show choir. It was a far-cry from her nights on Broadway, but Shelby found that she truly enjoyed coaching Vocal Adrenaline, mentoring students, and helping them craft their skills to pursue their passion in the arts. Shelby knew that she could always go back to the stage, but she was content for now and it also helped that she wasn't just good at her job, she was great at it. Known as the "Ice Queen" around the show choir circuit, Shelby had a take-no-prisoners attitude and was known to be fiercely competitive. On the other hand, she was also extremely dedicated to her students and went to great lengths to help them achieve excellence. With her Broadway training and wildly creative ideas, Shelby built Vocal Adrenaline into a show choir powerhouse winning Nationals the past two years and a third easily within grasp.
So no, Shelby wasn't unhappy. But she knew that she wasn't completely happy either. Despite achieving some of her wildest dreams and reaching heights she didn't even know was possible, Shelby couldn't lie and say that any of it measured up to the joy she felt giving birth to Rachel. In fact, this entire time, Shelby's felt a little broken, as if a part of her was missing and that emptiness never seemed to fill up no matter how many bows she took or show choir competitions she won. She hasn't felt whole for years now that she thinks about it. She hasn't felt quite together for some time. That is until she watched her daughter perform on stage and she physically felt her heart mend itself and quadruple in size.
Shelby parked her Range Rover outside of the popular coffee shop and cut the engine. Her knuckles white from gripping the steering wheel, she took a deep breath and slowly pushed the air out through her lips. Nervous was an understatement. It's been almost a week since Sectionals and her anxiety had only grown tenfold. She still had no idea what the Berry men wanted to talk to her about. Hiram had been short and cryptic on the phone insisting that it would be better to discuss everything in person.
What was everything? Did they want to meet with her only to remind her to stay away from Rachel? Was Rachel okay? Why were they even back from Chicago? Shelby didn't get her yearly letter or photos from the Berry's last December, so the last update she got was when Rachel just turned 12 almost two years ago and everything seemed fine then. Shelby was devastated when she didn't get her update on Rachel last year. It wasn't in the contract, so she she assumed that they had just cut her off for whatever reason. It hurt her deeply for months and she had only started to accept it. She didn't know how she would react if Hiram and Leroy were luring her in only to shoot her down. She had only seen Rachel for maybe less than ten minutes and she was already so attached.
A loud knock on her window quickly pulled her away from her thoughts. Shelby turned her head to see Hiram standing outside the driver's side of the car giving her a quizzical look. Caught off guard, she fumbled around until she pushed the button to roll the window down.
"Hey! Sorry I didn't mean to startle you," Hiram said, amused again at Shelby's behavior. "Are you coming in? I think Leroy's already inside."
Feeling knots in her stomach begin to grow, Shelby opened her mouth to respond but nothing came out. She opted to just nod her head yes.
"Everything alright?"
"Yeah," she lied, cursing Hiram for always being so intuitive. "Sorry, I'll be right in. Just give me a second and I'll meet you in there?"
Recognizing that the woman needed a few moments to herself, he politely nodded, and quickly walked away.
As soon as she saw Hiram walk inside the coffee shop, Shelby immediately put her head down on the steering wheel and started to take panicked breaths. It's been years since she's had a anxiety attack and Shelby would be damned if she had one today. Refusing to let the panic consume her, she tried to gain control of the situation and took a few deep breaths while consciously attempting to slow down the pounding in her heart. In and out. In and out. She kept her eyes closed and focused on her breathing. After a few moments of deep, generous breaths and trying to relax her muscles, Shelby slowly started to feel the edge come off. Once she felt as calm as she could get, she pulled down her mirror and looked at her reflection staring back at her.
You can do this. You're Shelby Corcoran, a Broadway Star, a renowned show choir coach. You can do anything. You can handle anything…. Except giving up your daughter.
Shelby quickly pushed those dangerous thoughts away before she could enter a downward spiral of self-deprecation and instead channeled strength and allowed herself to feel a new resolve wash over her. No matter what they wanted to talk about. No matter what they tell her. No matter what happened in the next few hours, Shelby was going to fight. She wasn't going to take whatever Hiram and Leroy had to dish lying down. Seeing Rachel in person gave her that push she needed. She didn't regret giving her to the Berry's, they had given her a wonderful life so far, from her understanding, but she also didn't want to be shut out anymore. She wanted some sort of contact or relationship. She wanted her daughter to be in her life in any way, shape, or form that she could get her.
She took another deep breath for safe measure, swiftly fixed her hair, gathered her purse, and got out of the car before she could change her mind. Seeing Hiram and Leroy sitting at a table by the window, she walked towards the coffee shop with a renewed purpose. She's going to get her baby back.