ROBERT & HOLLY SCORPIO: DESTINED FOR ETERNITY
CHAPTER 16
JUNE 1983
The hours seem to drag by as Holly waits for word on how Robert's surgery is progressing. The news of the hostage situation and the shooting has been told around town, so many of Robert and Holly's friends have shown up at the hospital to show their support. Luke Spencer paces the corridor, unable to comfort Holly and unable to forgive himself for his part in the shooting. Everyone is doing their best to keep Holly's spirits up, insisting that Robert will be fine. He is young and healthy and has alot to live for. But none of their words can soothe Holly's frayed nerves. She could feel herself falling apart inside. She keeps envisioning a life without Robert and knew it would be a cold, lonely place. She could not stand the thought of her life without him being a part of it. Holly, no longer able to sit still, stands up and begins pacing down a corridor, hoping to take the edge off of her frayed nerves. Tiffany Hill soon joins Holly, trying to keep her mind occupied as she prattled on about nothing in particular. But her thoughts are also on Robert, a friend that she dearly loved.
"He will be fine, Holly," Tiffany insists. "Don't give up hope. We can't."
"I love him," Holly says to Tiffany, as if surprised by her own realization. "I had no idea just how much until now. He can't die, not when I haven't even had the chance to tell him how I feel."
Tiffany had been there when Holly had lost Luke and she knew how badly that had affected her. She just assumes that Holly is experiencing all those feelings of loss again. That she is afraid it will happen again.
"Holly, you survived when you thought Luke had died, remember? You made it through that and you will this, no matter what."
Holly turns to Tiffany with tears in her eyes. "Yes, I did survive, and it was all because of Robert. He made me see what my future could hold, with HIM. And all I did in return was hurt him beyond compare."
"That is not true, Holly."
"Yes, it is," Holly insists. "God, Tiffany, I have been so stupid. I felt so guilty when Luke returned that I totally ignored what was right in front of me. While Robert has been nothing but patient and understanding, I have been pushing away all these feelings that I have for him."
"Holly, you have to be careful. You are understandbly worried for Robert. It is impossible for your thoughts and emotions to be all neat and tidy. You will see when Robert is out of danger. Of course you care for Robert, it is only natural."
"No, Tiffany, it is much much more than that," Holly tells her. "I have been so stupid. I felt so guilty when Luke returned that I pushed my feelings aside."
"Holly, please listen to me," Tiffany says softly. "We all know you are very worried about Robert, you have every right to be. But be careful and don't make all of your decisions because of this. Your feelings are all jumbled up and that is only natural. But Robert will be fine, you will see."
Holly looks off into the distance. "No, it's much more than that. So much more," She says quietly. "It is hard to explain, even to myself. If you will excuse me, Tiffany, I am going to the chapel. I need to ask God to take care of Robert, to let him live. I may not deserve him, but I need him. I need him far more than I knew."
Tifffany sympathizes with her. "Don't be so hard on yourself, Holly. You know Robert wouldn't want you to do that."
Holly manages a brief smile. "No," She agrees. "He always wanted what was best for me. Will you please come and get me if there is any word on Robert?"
Tiffany agrees and Holly walks off. Tiffany watches her as she leaves and is very worried for both of her friends. Luke Spencer walks over to her. "Where is Holly going?"
"To the chapel," SHe answers. "Luke, I am really worried about her. If Robert should die,"
"He won't!" Luke insists as he interrupts her. "Robert will make it. I know he will." He walks off in the direction that Holly had just went and finds her sitting quietly in the dark chapel. He stands by the door, giving her the privacy that she needs.
"God, please, just please let Robert live. He doesn't deserve to die like this. Maybe I haven't been the most perfect wife, but I do love him. I think he is the only person who has ever loved me for who I really am. He has given me unconditional love and respect. I need him to live Lord. Please help him."
Tears are flowing down her cheeks as she ends her prayer. Luke quietly goes in and sits down beside her.
"Holly," He whispers. Startled, Holly opens her eyes and turns to him. Luke wipes the tears from her face. "He's going to be good as new, English."
"What if he isn't?" She cries. "What if he dies, Luke?"
Slightly aggitated, Luke says, "Don't do the 'what if's' Holly. It will only drive you crazy."
Holly takes note of his calm demeanor. "What is wrong with you, Luke? This is your best friend. Do you even remember that?"
Luke looks away from her. "Yes, I remember, but. . ."
Holly interrupts him. "When Robert thought you had died in that avalanche, he cried for you, Luke. He mourned your death. And when you returned, he had to mourn the loss of your friendship. And now, he has to pay for YOUR stupid decision with what may be his life! You act like you don't even care!"
"You're wrong, Holly, I do care. How can you think I don't? I do not want Robert to die, but this does not change the fact that you were mine and he stole you from me!" Luke explains.
Holly sighs heavily. "I am so tired of this conversation, Luke. How many times do I have to tell you that Robert did NOT steal me! I fell in love with him! Do you understand that? Nobody coerced me, nobody drugged me, nobody did a damn thing to make me love Robert! He is a wonderful loving, compassionate man. He became my best friend and then my lover. I am sorry if that hurts you, Luke, but that is the reality of what happened. You have to quit blaming Robert for all of this!" Holly stops her tirade as suddenly as it started. "God, what am I doing? None of this matters if Robert dies. Nothing matters at all but Robert." She abruptly rushes out of the chapel, leaving Luke alone in the silence, alone with his guilt before only God, where he prays for an absolution he wasn't sure he deserved, and praying for Robert's life to be spared.