Author's Note: This is for Sheena, who has threatened my life if I don't post something soon ;) Also, thanks to everyone for all the wonderful reviews and encouragement!

Buffy was able to forget about the fact that she had gotten nowhere trying to find the slayer, and that things were strained between her and Methos after Dawn returned from her date with Richie. They had come back before curfew, mainly because Richie was afraid Buffy would hurt him if they didn't and Dawn had floated through the next few weeks afterward.

Buffy still had her misgivings, but seeing her sister so happy was hard to ignore. The demons that had haunted her ever since she found out she was the key seemed to be fading from her eyes. Sunnydale, the destruction, the first evil….it was all still there, but so was the happiness over her new relationship with Richie. She seemed rejuvenated. And Dawn's rejuvenation was helping her too. It made her think that for once, despite all the evil that surrounded them there was some good as well.

It helped her to see that relationships were not always a lost cause…that things could work out. It gave her hope. Even if she was unable to make things work with someone, her sister had clearly not inherited her dysfunction. To know that Dawn still had that chance made Buffy incredibly grateful.

Even Methos noticed the change in her mood., although the awkwardness and tension remained.

She had been making frequent progress reports to Willow and Kennedy who were still in Brazil, looking for the ancient sect of witches. Willow had been desperately trying to find some other information about the slayer Buffy was looking for, but her previous breakthrough against the First had not been without side effects. Her ability to connect to the other slayers around the world was severely hindered. She was getting extremely violent headaches with startling frequency. Kennedy was worried about her, so she insisted on a weakly conference call and begged Willow to tell Buffy what was happening.

Willow, not wanting to add to the slayer's worries had not said anything, but it was getting a little too painful to keep quiet much longer.

She was still working up the nerve to tell Buffy her worries when they finally managed to get a line through to the new Watcher's Council in England for their latest weakly conference call.

"We all here?" Buffy was aware at the impatience in her voice, but she was getting tired of patrolling every night and coming up with nothing. She could hear Giles clearing his throat.

"We're here Buffy." Willow said. She sounded nervous. "But it's not all good news."

"Still haven't found those witches?" She let her shoulders slump slightly and Dawn gave her a curious look from the living room where she had been watching the conversation.

"Kennedy and I are looking Buffy, we are." Willow assured her. "But it's been…harder since I tapped through the first's defences."

"Harder…" Buffy heard the hesitation in her friend's voice and seized on it. "How do you mean?"

"Is something wrong Willow?" Giles' tone held deep concern and that worried Buffy even further.

"It's nothing, it's…" she trailed off and then let out a soft yelp as Kennedy poked her sharply in the ribs, urging her to tell the others of her problems. "OK, OK! Look, I've been having some headaches ever since the night I managed to tap into the Italian slayer, that's all. I'm sure they'll go away soon."

"Willow this is serious." Giles said softly. "What you're experiencing is magickal residue from a highly dangerous source. Something in the first's essence was exchanged with yours when you broke through its defences. It could be harming you slowly with those headaches."

"It's not that bad, Giles." She insisted.

"Will, if Giles is right…"

"Do you want me to come back?" Willow asked, sounding suddenly defeated. "Because if we do, I don't know if we'll get another chance. We're almost there."

"Not yet Willow." Giles told her. "But if it gets worse, you let me know post haste. I don't want anything happening to you."

"I promise." She told Giles. "What about you? Anything over there?"

"The girls are coming along brilliantly." He promised. "Faith makes a remarkable teacher. They should be ready for field work very soon."

"What are you saying?" Buffy asked cautiously.

"I'm saying that should you require any backup…"

"No." Buffy cut him off before he could finish.

"Buffy, this is what you did the spell for." Giles told her patiently. "You may need their help if you can't find the slayer in time and the first manages to achieve whatever it's trying to do."

"I won't put them into something like this." Buffy said firmly. "What I did, I did so they could be free. Not so they could get killed, or…" she trailed off thinking suddenly of Xander who had lost an eye because of her, Anya who was now dead and Spike who had died so they all might live. Never again. She wouldn't do it.

"Buffy they're slayers." Willow said gently. "It's kinda what they do."

"I know that Will. I know that more than any of you. I just don't think they could possibly be ready for this." She shook her head, though they couldn't see it. "They don't go in the field like this until I say."

"Alright," Giles said with a sigh. "But you let me know if you need anything, no matter how small."

"I will." She promised.

"What about Dawnie and Xander? How is everything there?" Having nothing new to add on the apocalypse front, Willow switched to more personal matters. The deep sigh on the other end told her that things were not all well there either.

"Dawn's fine." Buffy told them guardedly. An almost inaudible click could be heard on the phone line, so softly that Buffy thought she might have imagined it.

"And Xander?" Willow questioned softly.

"Africa for all I know." Buffy replied wryly. The phone click could be heard once more accompanied by Giles telling Andrew to cease his infernal eavesdropping and do something useful for once. She ignored it, and continued. "I haven't seen him lately…sometimes he's gone for days Will. I don't know how to talk to him anymore."

"Keep at him Buffy." Willow encouraged. "As soon as this is over, I'm coming to you guys OK?"

"Alright Will." Buffy said with a sad smile. She feared that it was already too late for him, but didn't want to say so out loud.

"We'll talk again in one week." Giles said firmly. It was clear the conversation was over.

"Later," Buffy said before hanging up the phone. She turned to Dawn who questioned her wordlessly and shook her head. She passed by her and grabbed her jacket and stake, intending to go out yet again looking for the slayer. Regardless of their success finding her thus far, they had to try.

She gave Dawn a sad look and said good night before heading out into the night alone.