Don't own them :)
"The things we did, the things we said
Keep coming back to me and make me smile again
You showed me how to face the truth
Everything that's good in me I owe to you"
-Backstreet boys, Never gone
Friday Afternoon
Riley sat in the hallway of her school next to Jackie and smiled at one of the teachers as they left the building. Remember the retreat? The one with 40 girls that Madison was forcing her to go on? This was the weekend.
Haley had come and gone over two weeks ago, and Riley was changed from her visit. What she was going to do about her current situation, she still didn't know. But what she did know was that come spring break she was flying out to LA with Jackie and possibly Maddie for some much needed rest and relaxation with her best friends. The only thing was that Riley had quite a few decisons to make before heading off to the City of Angels.
"Ms. Smith"
"Mr. Idiot"
"Wow"
"Huh?" Riley asked, looking at the Math teacher, Mr. Velez. Mr. Velez was a teacher who, though older then Mr. Santiago looked much younger. Riley had never had him as a teacher, but thought he was extremely cool.
"Did she just call you Mr. Idiot?" Mr. Velez asked Mr. Santiago
"Yes I did" Riley responded for her teacher
The Math teacher shook his head and led the way out the door. As he followed his colleague Mr. Santiago called back to the girls. "Bye girls, have fun!"
Riley rolled her eyes in response and said "Bye Mr. Idiot!"
"That's a new one" Jackie said
"Hush Monkey" Riley said and laughed as she stood up from the floor and reached her hand out to her friend. "Seeing as you and dear Madison are making me go on this thing, then the least ya'll can do is put up with my stupidity for the weekend"
"And when don't we put up with your stupidity?" Jackie asked grabbing her best friend's hand
Riley let go suddenly causing Jackie to fall back on the floor with a thud and raised her eyebrow
"Alright, alright I'm sorry damnit" Jackie groaned. Riley smirked at her and offered her friend her hand again, which Jackie declined this time, getting up on her own. Glancing at the look on Riley's face, Jackie couldn't hold in her comment
"God you are so perfect for each other"
"What the fuck are you talking about!" Riley asked bewildered. The only guy that was anywhere near them was David one of the janitors, and while Riley loved David for his stupidity and jokes, she was praying to the good Lord above that Jackie was NOT talking about him.
"You and Orton" Jackie answered her, walking down the hall toward Ms.Peri's room
Riley looked at the spot where her friend had just been. Twirling around so she could run after Jackie, she quickly caught up and spun around to stop Jackie.
"Ok wow" Jackie said blinking rapidly
"Hush, what the fuck are you talking about?" Riley asked, eager to get some insight from someone, who while close to her, hadn't yet offered her opinion on the situation.
"Jesus Christ Ri! All I was doing was saying that you and Randy are made for each other because you guys have the same evil smirk" Jackie explained exasperated
Riley sighed in response and moved out of Jackie's way so they could continue to Ms. Peri's classroom
"You really need a break Ri…you're like taking everything way too seriously"
"I'm nervous Jac"
"What the hell for, you went on retreat last year."
"Yea…but my situation was different then"
"Right… you had friends, you had boyfriend drama, John had fucked up some how and you were worried about him, your parents weren't around, and you were sick. HEY!That sounds just like your situation now" Jackie stopped and looked at her friend who had a shocked look on her face
"Riley…stop. Just go with it ok? For once, just go with it and don't over analyze it" Jackie said looking into Riley's eyes
"Okay…"
Later that day, Putnam, New York.
"Oh God, Bumble Fuck part II" Riley groaned causing Madison to laugh. Bumble Fuck was what they had nicknamed the retreat house from last year. Out in the middle of no where. Obviously this was the same. Great.
The girls were sitting in a circle and looking at Ms.De.
"Ladies…this retreat is entitled "The Courage to become". Become what you might ask…become you is my answer. Whoever that may be. And now Ms. Jameson will talk to you about some of her experiences."
Riley sat there and allowed her to be carried away by the words of her teachers.
Saturday night
The retreat had been interesting, moving and caused for quite a few tears. And it wasn't over yet. They were sitting in the beautiful small chapel that was in the retreat house. Once again all the attention was focused on Ms. De
"Ladies, there are some people who have thoughts and wishes that they wish to tell you, but they aren't here" She paused and reached over and hosted a box in the air. "These envelopes contain letters from people who care about you…some you know about, some who love you more then you can ever imagine, and some whose love you never knew you had…" With those words, fear gripped Riley's heart. The envelopes John had given Ms. De that afternoon…
"Ri!" Ms. De called out her name and handed her envelope. Riley sat there, holding the large yellow envelope in her hands. Inside contained letters. Either there were just the standard letters from teachers, or the people in her life had shocked her. Breathing deeply Riley reached into her envelope and withdrew a handful of letters from numerous people. Riley began with her parent's letter. As she began reading, the tears began to come. Slowly she finished and worked her way through the letters in the envelope. Her Dad, her Mom, Ms. Jameson, Ms. De Groat, Sister Jane Marie. As she finally began to calm down she came to an envelope that had John's handwriting on it.
"Riley Isabelle Smith" was printed on the envelope
Blinking rapidly she reached over Jackie and placed the tissue box in between them. Opening the envelope she began to read
Dear Riley,
I hope you are having one of the best times of your life. You've grown so much from my little five year old brat that use to annoy the shit out of me. The things you've thought me, I can never ever forget. From showing me how to treat a girl ("Ew John don't give her those flowers!") to showing me real pain.
I would kill to be able to sit down in front of you and tell you all these things I feel face to face, but I don't deserve that. Honestly, if you haven't thrown away this letter without reading it, you are a better and stronger person then I.
When you walked out of my life those years ago, you tore my family apart single handily. We had grown so accustomed to having you there that we didn't know what to do without you there. You have your reasons, I'm sure. But I don't know what they are. And I don't know what made you feel as though you couldn't tell me what your situation was. At that point, nothing could have possibly made me turn away from you Ri.
So when you left, I became a stupid overgrown man with a child's brain. I wanted revenge. So I got Randy to help me, and gave you what you deserved…
And now I realized that the chances of me ever having you in my life are zero to none. I miss you so much. And I'm so proud of the person you are, and I have so much love and respect for you that I'm overwhelmed sitting here, trying to write all of this down…
Just know this Bella. I love you. And I always will. You are my sister. Not by blood, but by love. Be what you want, do what you want. I have every confidence in you, even if you do want me dead.
Soar into the skies Princess…this may be the last time you ever hear from me. But go with those words. Soar into the skies.
Love,
John
Riley wiped away the tears from her face and sighed. Folding the letter, she stuffed it into the envelope. Drawing her knees up into her chest, she looked at her three remaining envelopes. None of them had writing on the front. Riley grabbed one of them randomly and opened it.
Twin,
It's been a long time since I've said those words. You've moved on and proved yourself to be so strong. You always were my pillar of strength. I don't know what went wrong with us. I don't know what happened. We both thought things were ok, but they weren't. And instead of fighting we let it go. Something's wrong, I know. I can see it when I look at you. We've always been able to read each other better then other people. Please, forgive me for letting our friendship go. She needed me. You know that, deep inside you know that. But it shouldn't have happened in that vindictive way. I'm sorry. I love you my twin. And no matter what happens, you've changed me. Thank you…
Love,
Marissa
Riley let out a sob. Missy was right across the room. Riley quickly jumped up and ran over to Missy, jumping over Lorraine who sat on the floor next to Missy and hugged her. Missy returned the hug and because the two knew each other so well, all was forgiven.
Returning to her seat next to Jackie, she paused before taking one of her remaining letters and hugged Jackie, and smiled at Madison who was sitting with some of her other friends. She and Missy may be on their way to working things out, but Riley would never forget all Jackie and Madison had done for her the past few months. They were her crying shoulder, her everything. There were few things Riley was willing to fight for anymore, but her friendships with these two girls would always be one of the things she would fight for.
There were two letters left. Once again going randomly, Riley opened a letter
Dear Riley,
I…I want so bad to sit here and tell you all the feelings I have for you, how I feel about everything we've been through. But I can't. I need to talk to you face to face baby.
Randy
Riley smiled…typical Randy. Sighing in defeat Riley reached for her last letter at the same time Jackie did hers. They opened their letters at the same time, looked at the bottom of the page and looked at each other. Looking across the room at Madison the same look fell on her face. Madison quickly crossed the room and sat with the girls. Sighing they all began to read their letters.
A/N: Of course I did a cliff hanger. I'll post the next chap soon I promise…Ok heres the deal with this chapter. My retreat was so special and meaningful to me, that I was scared to write about it. I felt that I wouldn't even be able to being to put the experience into words. It was so special to me. So I chose to only put some of the factors in here, basically the letters. The next letter is going to be a crucial one, and it explains a lot of what I'm going through in my life right now. So read and review.
Love
Devilontherun