The sheer embarrassment and shame I felt for losing control. I was running out. I'd have to find a way back to my territory. I must see Ben at once. All magic has a price, mine shall be death. Someday, however, that day is not today.
Before leaving, I stopped by the house. A white brick Tudor home crumbling away. Ivy trailed up and into the once beautiful home, patches cling to the walls and stretch out a hole in the roof. The moonlight streamed into the attic.
I grabbed the last two bottles of potion. My hands shook another bout was coming on, my eyes flashed black I watched the determination in my face as I felt the pain sear. I screamed out making the mirror crack and shatter.
The black veins spread across my face, the tendrils stretching away from my lips and eyes. I fell to my knees clutching my arm to my chest, my fingers flexing and spasming. I could sense him.
He was nearby, I forced my fingers to function, I splayed both my hands open onto the rough wooden floors. I spoke the words in clenched teeth. I was able to move time, pushing me into the past.
I left the house. I took off on my bike, I took swigs from the potion while I drove out of the Forks limit. I could only push the time back so far, the further you jump you risk not being able to get back to your period.
The rules of time travel were simple. Don't die. Don't see your past self. And lastly, you can potentially change the future, however, it's not nearly as easy as movies make it out to be. You must ignore both of those rules and seek out your past self, kill them and take over their life.
Why didn't I go back in time to kill Victoria? I thought about it but that only takes care of her. What about the other treacherous bastards? It was much easier to con my way into getting help. Even then, I hadn't foreseen the obstacles I've encountered. How was I supposed to know he was still in love with me? Fuck!
I can't worry about that idiot right now. I drove to Los Angels. It was time I got refilled. I'm not sure what he puts in this shit but it helps me to control my deteriorating brain. I've tried everything. Unfortunately, since I'm forbidden in my kingdom, I have no choice but to go to such lengths.
Benjamin Turner, a master at alchemy and potions. He worked mainly out of a club in LA. Sinister was the name. Fire dancers performing tricks, Gogo dancers up in cages. Acrobatics and silk performers on the beams. All of them witches. I walked freely in the back, I passed these two dancers snorting lines.
I made it to his office. His smile lit across his face. "I was wondering when I would see you. I didn't expect this timeline, what can I do for you gorgeous?"
"I could bring that bitch back just to kill her again."
"Which one is it this time?"
"Do try and keep up Ben. I need these potions delivered to this address."
"The price has gone up. Sit down, talk to me."
"Ben, I don't have time for this."
"Sit, you know I deal in gossip. Talk to me. "
"I didn't expect it to be this difficult. I had forgotten just how stubborn he was. I... I tried to kill him. I was stuck, I got lost in a memory and I attacked him."
"Jasper? Did he survive?"
"Yes. Thankfully, Mary pulled my plug. She surprised me today, she killed an innocent. I'm concerned with what my actions are doing in the future. I seem to be uprooting many roots."
"I warned you."
"You didn't say he would react this way."
"I said it wouldn't be easy. He's your mate, frankly, I'm surprised either of you survived being away from one another this long."
"Easy, he believed I was dead. Now it seems the bond has begun to awaken once more. He feels the pull."
"Oh poor me, he loves me. That's what you sound like. I will never understand your desire to fight destiny, Fate."
"Haha, look I've got my reasons. Thank you."
"Wait, they are meeting together soon. It's been heard of your survival. They won't rest until you're dead. What are you going to do?"
"What I always do. Prevail." I hugged him before leaving his office. As I walked through the club I locked eyes with one of his girls, she was dancing up in the cage. I tipped her before leaving.
Once back in the home, I was able to rest. I needed to recharge before attempting to leave. It wouldn't bode well for me to rip my mind apart, I still require it. I sat about in the attic going over my files. I was avoiding his. I needed to focus on my work.
The twelve had begun that night. The night I decided to replace Maria. Her madness had bent too far, I had gotten quite tired of being ordered around. So I took what I wanted.
Dominic Blake had been my second in command. To be honest I'm not shocked that he betrayed me. I always was wary of him, but I was taught you keep your enemies close.
The twelve didn't consist of all twelve. Many have been disposed of, while others simply left. Now all that was left were Dominic, Victor, Sebastien, Amber, Natalia, and lastly Shane.
It had been Shane, she had convinced the rest to let me leave. That trying to take me on would be pointless, she had known. The one thing I had desperately tried to keep anyone from learning.
His location.
So the deal was if I leave in peace, never to return to my territory. She would keep it secret from the rest, and Jasper would stay safe.
Otherwise, I would trigger an all- out war. My own rules and laws were turned against me. Had I killed them without proof, it would have left me in the same position. Running for my life. The irony dawned on me. Karma really is a bitch!
She gained that information by lulling my defenses. For the past year, she snuck into my rooms and we fucked. Regularly! She had been using the time to gather information. She found the files I kept in my office. They had been under lock and key. The key hung around my neck on a chain... yeah she's next on my list.
After resting my eyes for a bit I had managed to muster enough strength to make it back home safely. I needed to feed soon! The hunger was beginning to wear a hole into my stomach. The ride was much smoother this time around. The bike still sitting downstairs, I chose to open the door and travel lightly.
I hadn't anticipated my order to be here already. Gotta love Ben and his punctuality. Just outside stood the delivery man. Peter Santos. An old friend, I hadn't known that it had been him that Jasper had run off with. It hadn't shocked me though. They had been like brothers.
His mate wasn't particularly my friend, she tolerated my presence. She held a deep fear and was suspicious of me. My being a witch had been what turned her off.
About a decade ago he showed up at my door needing a place to stay. He couldn't fight the desire to feast anymore. They had attempted the lifestyle of going non-human, he had heard of my practices and decided it was the next best thing.
Since then he has been the only person I could expressly trust with the knowledge of my plan. I knew he would never jeopardize Jasper or his family. He has been my eyes and ears inside my home.
"Thank you."
"He believes you've left."
"Good..., why do you look that way?"
"He doesn't seem well. He kept asking questions about your past. He's sniffing around Fate. I had no choice but to throw him a bone."
"What did you say?" I tried to keep the anger under control. Too many things were beginning to unravel.
"He wanted to know about your father. I told him about that night."
"Which night Peter!"
"The one when you met him."
I balled my fists up, I counted backward in my mind. The flashbacks threatened to burst from behind the walls of my mind palace. I could almost feel him. Feel his flesh in my teeth. The sweetness of his blood pouring down my gullet.
I opened my eyes, Peter looked sympathetic to my situation. Once I was calm I spoke softly.
"Thank you for diverting his attention elsewhere. Maybe searching through my past will keep him busy and out of my way."
"If it helps, I brought you this."
He placed a cooler next to me. Packets of blood and a few cuts of fresh cadaver meat. I inhaled the dead flesh and then greedily tore into it. It was human male thigh, I moaned in pleasure as I chewed the buttery texture of meat. Peter looked on in mild disgust.
"Thank you, he's been feeding me animal meat. I'll try and make this last. "
"You're gonna have to. Dominic has been monitoring all movement outside of the territory."
"I'm told they are planning their next moves."
"They met late last night. You've been gone for a week. I was getting worried."
"Shit. I must have slept longer than intended. I can't run out of these, I must have regular deliveries."
"I'll see what I can do."
Time ran differently in the past than in the present. My nap had stretched me further than intended. I can't miss doses again, I must monitor my intake. Peter left and I moved the blood into the house. The meat has long been gone and working its way through my digestive tract.
The memories of my father played in the back of my mind. I hadn't intended on ever seeing that man, yet the universe had other plans. It had been years after the supposed freedom of my people, yet in many places we were still owned.
The plantation my mother grew up on was located in Louisiana just outside of New Orleans. Pointe Dubois was an indigo plantation. Sugar cane, rice, and pecans had also been grown depending on the season. The Dubois family owned two plantations.
The second had been owned by my father. The first was in his mothers' control, she had been the most vicious woman on this earth.
Louis had been sent away as a child, back to their home of Bordeaux France. He was forced to attend military school as punishment for a dalliance with a young slave girl. He didn't hate the slaves unlike his mother, her hatred for my people burned deep. She had been raised by her racist daddy, he had been the original master making my father the third generation.
My grandmothers' name was Elisabeth Dubois. Her father Guillaume Dubois, a creole, his slaves started construction of the plantation in 1804, it wasn't completed until the following year.
He had owned only six slaves at the time. It wouldn't grow to the massive size until under the fist of Elisabeth. She expanded the plot to 12,000 acres which included 69 cabins with two families to each one, a slave infirmary, communal kitchens, and a plot of land for each cabin that houses a pig pin or a chicken coop and a small vegetable garden.The rest of the land held the big house and the crops.
The house wasn't called the big house for nothing. Elisabeth expanded the home by adding two wings to the back. It was U- shaped and multi-leveled, held a central courtyard where a personal garden was housed.
A separate house contained the kitchen, to keep the home from catching fire. The sugar mill was located about a mile down the road surrounded by sugar cane and the rest of the crops.
The second plantation wasn't built until my father returned home from his time in France. Before he had been bookish, artistic, and introspective.
After he had been lively and confident, his young wife had changed something in him. Things took a turn once she grew ill, she grew quickly pregnant after marriage but continued to lose children. She had bouts of suicidal depression for years after.
To manage her moods the young slave girl now a grown woman was brought to live in the home. She stayed by the woman's side constantly medicating and soothing her delusional states. Her name was Claudia. Even now I can hear the name hurled at me by Magnolia in her frenzied native tongue.
My mother was married now, she had already borne Elisabeth two children.
A boy and a girl. The boy was young Andrè, he had been put to work the day he was able to walk properly. While the girl hadn't made it to term, my mother buried my older sister in the garden, flowers grew over her grave. To this day if you were to walk across that land you would see lilies growing for Lavè.
In his depression, my father grew cynical and destructive. Drinking away the money his mother beat and bleed my ancestors for.
One night after spending his hours in a brothel stinking of gin and sex he came across my mother. The feelings for her had never left, his desire for possession of my mother lurking just behind his polite demeanor. He did what men always do, they take.
He took everything from her. It started as glances when no one had been looking and then cornering her in corridors trying to persuade her into an affair.
She gave herself to him finally and from then on she was his. Locked into an unforgiving dance of forbidden love of the boy she once knew and the hatred of the man he had become.
If his wife had a good day he would avoid my mother in shame. If she was having a bad day he begged her for touch, for love.
This affair went on for years. Once Elisabeth found out that not only had her son been pissing away her money but he had resumed the relationship with the jezebel of his youth.
In retaliation, Elisabeth sold Andrè, the loss of their son, and Magnolia's affair ended the life of Jacques, her husband.
The love turned sour. But he still hadn't let go. By this time his wife had been notified of the affair and began mistreating my mother. Calling her names, hitting her, spitting, you name it and that woman had done it.
The first time he touched my mother without her permission had been when she finally had told him no.
That she wouldn't be his anymore. That he had taken everything and what had she left to give. The boy that had been so kind and shy was now a monster of his mother's creation.
He made it abundantly clear that it didn't matter if his wife heard, or his mother knew. It didn't matter if they had played together as children. It didn't matter that they had once planned to run away with one another. It didn't matter that she had been married. It didn't matter that her love for him had dried up. She was his!
She was his possession and he owned her heart and her body. That wasn't the last time he took what he believed to be his.
She had tried to run away multiple times but each time he had found her. He saved her from being beaten by his mother on more than one occasion. The day his wife died had been her blessing, she finally would be set free. Louis had other plans. Before Claudia was even in the ground he had moved my mother into his rooms.
He was free to love her openly now.
Regardless of Elisabeth's displeasure of him galavanting her around as his new wife adorned with jewels and gowns of luxury. She no longer fought with him about it.
It just became accepted that my mother was his. No man dared look at her as they feared his rage. It was thought that my mother couldn't bear any more children, to her surprise Louis had managed to do what Jacques couldn't.
The day she found out, she drank a potion her mother had taught her the day she had her first bleed. It failed and so she made one last attempt to rid herself of him, the difference this time was she used the magic of old to help her.
I had been a shock to him. He hadn't known of my existence. After emancipation, many of the slaves left, but others chose to stay as they had nowhere else to go.
It had been a year after accepting Jasper as my mate. I had known of his past but I believed that I could fix him. Change him! Once I saw my father I knew, there was no hope.
I had gotten many looks as I walked the land of Point Dubois. I knew why when I entered the home my mother ran from, there he was, sitting in his chair watching the fire and staring at a portrait of my mother hanging above the mantle. A bottle in hand, he called me by her name at first, thinking me a specter coming for his soul.
Once he calmed down it dawned on him my age. He sat silently gazing at me in awe. The resemblance had been uncanny, I had his eyes, his nose, and his hair.
His hair was black as night, the blue eyes and pale skin contrasted against the shade. He had plump even lips and a strong nose. His clothes were tattered and worn. The money seemed to be long gone after the death of Elisabeth.
He didn't say anything to me. He tried but the words died on his flushed lips. He was pink from the liquor. Eventually, he mustered the ability to tell me how much I looked like her.
"Funny, I've heard all my life how I look like a beast."
My response had been taken in stride. He didn't refute his treatment of my mother. He didn't defend himself or anything else, he just sat there watching me. It enraged me. It had been the first time that I lost control, my magic crackled around me. He didn't seem afraid, he knew. They all had known the woman my mother had been.
Despite her power, she never used her magic for her own gain. She always spoke of prices. The prices you must pay for the magic you use. I paid for mine that night.
I sat the house ablaze, I stayed in the burning building watching my father staring back at me. The flames would have eaten us both had he not saved us. I hadn't noticed that my father hadn't been human anymore. I had been so clouded with rage I hadn't sensed the non-beating heart in his chest.
Turns out a revolt had happened only a year after my mother left. It had been started because something had been picking off the slaves one by one. A vampire!
Many died that night including Louis. Every day a chicken would be slaughtered and left on his doorstep. He hadn't stepped foot outside that house until that day. He feasted on every being in sight.
My rage had cost the rest of those living on those lands their lives. I watched the carnage, a part of me had enjoyed it. While the other sat immobile in horror at the display of violence.
That's when I knew. I too had been a monster like him. A part of me held the love of my mother, and the other the hatred of my father. I vowed then I'd never let their curse into this world again.
Love!
Magnolia had once loved him and he had once been loving and kind.
I ran from him in fear. He didn't chase after me, he never tried to reach out. We kept our distance all these years, to this day he still sits waiting for death. Waiting for her to drag him to hell. Someday, he shall get his wish.