Doesn't really matter - Chapter 2
Sakura sat eating her salad inwardly smiling at herself, imagining what the reaction of the person who was trailing her would have when they found her note. She couldn't help but smirk, she would give anything to be there and see them. She looked around at took in the friendly atmosphere of the restuarant. She was sitting outside on the patio, watching the traffic of people move along as she sat calmly eating.
She watched in interest as a teenage girl was standing on the corner of the street, clearly waiting for somebody. It was a few moment before a smiling, shy looking boy a little older than the girl approahed her from behind with a bouquet of flowers in his hand. He walked quietly up to the girl and placed a gentle hand over her eyes, causing a large smile to appear on her face. She spun around giggling as she threw her arms around him, and kissed him on the cheek.
Sakura felt a pang as she watched them walk away hand in hand. They looked so happy, she only wished she could be like that, but... she shook her head, angry at herself for thinking such weak thoughts. She looked down at her plate and was surprised to find that she had finished it. She sighed and signalled to the waitor that she wanted her bill. She paid and walked to her motorcycle in a slight daze. She was about to mount her bike and put the key in the igniation when she thought she heard her name being called. She turned absently towards the voice, and dropped her keys in shock. There it was again, the flash of blonde, and the darkest eyes she had ever known.
'No! no!' she thought. 'This can't be happening, not twice in one day, go away, go away, you're dead, you dont' exist anymore!' She shook her head and backed away in fear as the figure started towards her. She finally backed into her motorcycle, when the figure was right in front of her.
"Miss? Did you forget this?" a soft voice questioned.
She blinked and shook her head. In front of her was the waitor who served her, with her wallet in his hand. Indeed his hair was blonde, but he had clear blue eyes. She looked at him and blinked again.
"Oh. Yes, I believe that's mine. Thank you." She took the wallet back, actually she rather grabbed it back, mounted her bike and drove away. The waitor stood there with his mouth open and slowly walked back to the restuarant shaking his head. 'Celebrities, always on the brink of a nervous breakdown' he thought.
Sakura drove away, completely obliviously to where she was going. 'What is wrong with me? Twice in one day?' She comtinued to drive, and had no idea how she managed to get home, but before she knew it, she was walking up her fronts steps. 'What? I'm home? I need my pills, now.' She rushed inside, went to her room, and kneeled beside her night stand. She opened the bottom drawer to reveal various bottles of pills. She took a small bottle filled with small blue pills and gingerly opened the bottle. She tried to calmly pour two pills into her hand, but now her hands, as her entire body was shaking. The bottle of pills spilled over the floor, causing the pills to roll in all directions. She pick up two with forced calmness and put them in her mouth, and swallowed. She smiled slightly as she recalled how she was the only person she knew who took pills without water, or any aid. She just swallowed them, and it used to disturb Touya, he would always say she would choke on the pills one day.
As quickly as the smile appeared, it just as quickly disppeared, and her face darkened as her thoughts resounded in her head. 'Used to, not anymore.' She closed her eyes as she leaned against the her bed and exhaled deeply. The pills were beginning to take effect, and she felt herself calming down. The side effects were also starting to take effect. She started to feel weaker, so she mustered the energy she had left and crawled into her bed. As she pulled the covers over herself, she started to fall into a blissful, dreamless sleep.
She slept well through the day, and into the night. When her cell phone, in her jacket on the floor began to ring, she didn't hear it and missed the call. A very important call. From a very important person.
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Syaoran and Meilin had driven back to their headquarters without conversation. The silence was piercing, but only one person was in a bad mood. Meilin on the other hand had a kind of goofy grin, that looked more like a smirk. When they had stepped into the car, she opened her mouth, but he immediately cut her off before she could say anything.
"Not a word. Don't you dare say a word" he hissed through gritted teeth
Meilin just looked straight ahead with the same goofy smirk on her face. Now the Wolves were sitting around the living room confused as they didn't know what happened. As soon as their leader had arrived he had stomped off to his office without a word to anyone, and had slammed and locked the door. Immediately all eyes fell on Meilin, but she just walked over to the couch were Adam was sitting and sat down dramatically on his lap. With a great deal of show, she flipped her hair casually and turned to Adam.
"Is there anything to eat? I'm hungry." she whined. Adam just raised an eyebrow at her. Something was off. He decided that they wouldn't be getting the little model since they weren't given any instructions since something had obviously gone wrong, wrong enough to get Syaoran mad, and Meilin acting like she was five. He nodded to Meilin's question.
"Yeah, we have some take out on the fidge."
Meilin made a face. "Take out? Again?"
Adam raised and eyebrow and looked at her quizically. "Yeah, well it's not like any of the guys can cook, and believe me, I'd rather go into a full fledged war against Dragons without any weapons before I eat anything that either you or Tomoyo cook." All the guys in the room laughed and nodded their heads as Adam said this, but quickly stopped once Meilin turned and glared at them. She was obviously related to Syaoran, their identical glares was better proof than a DNA sample.
She playfully slapped Adam across the head before getting up and motioning to Tomoyo.
"Hey, let's get something to eat." Tomoyo opened her mouth but then shut it, because Meilin was shooting her a *look*. Tomoyo got up and followed Meilin into the kitchen, while Eriol and Adam exchanged looks. It didn't take a genious to interpret them.
'Something is definately up.'
Meilin rummaged through the fridge looking for food for some time while Tomoyo stood behind her, arms crossed over her chest, with an eyebrow raised. Meilin continued to rummage through the contents in silence, until Tomoyo broke the silence.
"What happened?"
Meilin continued to rummage through the fridge and didn't answer. She sighed and turned around to Tomoyo.
"What did you guys eat? There's like nothing in there." Tomoyo just raised an eyebrow at her and stared.
"We had Italian. There should be some pasta. What happened? It wasn't her, was it?"
Meilin turned around and looked at Tomoyo with a odd expression. "Come on, let's get out of here, I need to talk to you, and I don't think that there's anything that I swallow in there."
She walked out of the kitchen, and again Tomoyo followed with a confused expression. They walked through the living room, and the eyes of many confused onlookers followed. Meilin waited until they were in her car and driving to the nearest Subway before she told Tomoyo the strange events of the afternoon. By the time that she finished, she was parking her car. They had a lot to discuss, so Meilin placed her order quickly and sat down to talk to Tomoyo.
"You found the tracking device on a cat?"
"Yeah."
"So, were you expecting that?"
"I don't know what I was expecting, but not really that. Even though I am a Wolf, I'm kind of glad of what happened."
Tomoyo looked at her. "Why?"
"Because." was the only explanation that she gave, but it wasn't what Tomoyo wanted, nor was it was she would settle for.
"Of?"
She was silent for a moment, and looked down at the table as if in shame, but when she looked up, there was a mischievious glint in her eyes.
"Because it looks like Syaoran has found his match."
"Touya seems more than enough to match him."
"That's not what I meant."
"Well, what did you mean?"
"Well, okay, that is kind of what I meant, but think about it, she could be his perfect match"
Tomoyo understood what she had meant the first time around, but she didn't want to admit it. She didn't want to think that what she had been thinking about had indeed been what her friend had also been thinking.
"It won't work." she said bluntly.
"Tomoyo!" Meilin looked at her in indignation. "I thought that you of all people, would understand what I'm talking about, and I thought that you were like me, thinking that anything would be possible."
"It won't work and you know it. We may like her, but it will never work out with Syaoran. They're both strong forces and one must heed the other. I've never seen Syaoran heed anybody, and if she would bend down to him, then she's not the one."
Meilin looked at her in confusion. "What you're saying is a paradox, you're aware of that right?"
Tomoyo looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Using big words today Meilin? I didn't know that was even in your vocabulary. And what I say makes perfect sense."
Meilin order was done so she stood up to get it. Over her shoulder she called, "Whatever you say, but just you wait, whatever that happens, we will still witness something very entertaining."
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The living room had cleared at last, and now it was only Adam and Eriol sitting on the couches. They had no idea where their girlfriends were, but for once it was the last thing on their minds. They were waiting for Syaoran to emerge from his room, which they both knew that he would. He had to get food sometime they figured. Sure enough, it wasn't long before he came out, and tried to walk into the kitchen as silently as possible for him, but he never was all that quiet.
"So, " Eriol asked as the walked in, finding him rummaging through the fridge. "What happened?"
He turned around slowly. "If I tell you, will you tell whether or not there is anything edible in the fridge?"
Adam stared at him. "Okay?"
"Well,..." he poured out the story, his eyes not meeting theirs, and his voice a monotone.
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Sakura woke up with a odd feeling. She didn't want to get out of bed, but as she looked at her alram clock, she knew that she must. She got out of bed groggily and intended to take a shower when she found herself instead walking into the kitchen. She walked over to her counter and picked up a mid-sized knife and held it above her wrist in a semi-trance. Part of her didn't know what she was doing, but part of her welcomed death. She looked at the knife postioned over her wrist without really seeing it. As she was about to bring the knife down onto her wrist, the phone rang, startling her out of her semi-trance. She turned at stared at the knife again, but this time with complete inderstanding, and she dropped the knife on the counter in disgust. She didn't know what was worse, her condition before she took her medication, or the side-effects of it.
Suicide.
It had always been close behind her, never letting her go, and she never let the thought of suicide linger far away in her thoughts. The reason wasn't the pills, but they were a perfect cover. She couldn't even count the number of times that she had tried to commit suicide, but somehow, she could never achieve it. It was practically a miracle the last time that she survived. She had lost so much blood, there wasn't even enough keep a small baby alive, yet she had pulled through. It was as though in that last instant, her body, or her mind wanted to keep her alive.
Touya always knew that the pills weren't the reason that she always comitted suicide. It began even before she needed the pills for anything, the first time was when she was only ten. Touya was the only force that kept Sakura alive all through the years. Even all the times that she had wanted to let go, he was there. He was always the one that rescued her, found her saved her. Now that she no longer had Touya, she didn't know what she was going to do.
The phone was still ringing, and the noise was starting to hurt her head, so she went to pick it up.
"Hello?"
There was silence on the other line, yet she didn't think that it was her brother. Her never called during the day. It was probably just another obsessive fan. She was about to hang up when she heard the other person speak. As she heard the words her blood chilled. Two words. Two simple words, but it brought her world crumbling down.
"Remember me?"
Of course she remembered. She would never forget his voice, she would never forget him. She threw her phone against the wall where it shattered. She slid down to the floor sobbing. She couldn't believe it. She didn't want to believe it. He was back to haunt her. Him.
She couldn't stop her tears. After everything she had been through, it was ironic that this would be the thing that that pushed her to her limit. The thing that pushed her over the edge. The tears didn't stop for an hour. They may have continued for much longer, but she had to go to a fitting for a show next month. After that she needed to meet with her agent and her stylist. She had a busy day ahead of her. She couldn't waste her time on these thoughts that would ultimately lead to her downfall. She wouldn't let it.
She got up off the floor, and brushed herself off. After she got dressed, she called a limo. In her state she didn't think that it was wise for her to crive herself. She may he headstrong and stubborn, but she wasn't stupid. As she settled herself in the plush upholstery of the limo, she closed herself and let herself fall into a state of thoughtlessness. She needed to immerse herself in her busy life, and not think about how out control it was.
A/N : Please review and tell me what you think of this chapter. If you think it's lame, please post it. I don't think it's that great, and it's pretty short, but I thought it was better to post something. Anyway, thank you all!
Sakura sat eating her salad inwardly smiling at herself, imagining what the reaction of the person who was trailing her would have when they found her note. She couldn't help but smirk, she would give anything to be there and see them. She looked around at took in the friendly atmosphere of the restuarant. She was sitting outside on the patio, watching the traffic of people move along as she sat calmly eating.
She watched in interest as a teenage girl was standing on the corner of the street, clearly waiting for somebody. It was a few moment before a smiling, shy looking boy a little older than the girl approahed her from behind with a bouquet of flowers in his hand. He walked quietly up to the girl and placed a gentle hand over her eyes, causing a large smile to appear on her face. She spun around giggling as she threw her arms around him, and kissed him on the cheek.
Sakura felt a pang as she watched them walk away hand in hand. They looked so happy, she only wished she could be like that, but... she shook her head, angry at herself for thinking such weak thoughts. She looked down at her plate and was surprised to find that she had finished it. She sighed and signalled to the waitor that she wanted her bill. She paid and walked to her motorcycle in a slight daze. She was about to mount her bike and put the key in the igniation when she thought she heard her name being called. She turned absently towards the voice, and dropped her keys in shock. There it was again, the flash of blonde, and the darkest eyes she had ever known.
'No! no!' she thought. 'This can't be happening, not twice in one day, go away, go away, you're dead, you dont' exist anymore!' She shook her head and backed away in fear as the figure started towards her. She finally backed into her motorcycle, when the figure was right in front of her.
"Miss? Did you forget this?" a soft voice questioned.
She blinked and shook her head. In front of her was the waitor who served her, with her wallet in his hand. Indeed his hair was blonde, but he had clear blue eyes. She looked at him and blinked again.
"Oh. Yes, I believe that's mine. Thank you." She took the wallet back, actually she rather grabbed it back, mounted her bike and drove away. The waitor stood there with his mouth open and slowly walked back to the restuarant shaking his head. 'Celebrities, always on the brink of a nervous breakdown' he thought.
Sakura drove away, completely obliviously to where she was going. 'What is wrong with me? Twice in one day?' She comtinued to drive, and had no idea how she managed to get home, but before she knew it, she was walking up her fronts steps. 'What? I'm home? I need my pills, now.' She rushed inside, went to her room, and kneeled beside her night stand. She opened the bottom drawer to reveal various bottles of pills. She took a small bottle filled with small blue pills and gingerly opened the bottle. She tried to calmly pour two pills into her hand, but now her hands, as her entire body was shaking. The bottle of pills spilled over the floor, causing the pills to roll in all directions. She pick up two with forced calmness and put them in her mouth, and swallowed. She smiled slightly as she recalled how she was the only person she knew who took pills without water, or any aid. She just swallowed them, and it used to disturb Touya, he would always say she would choke on the pills one day.
As quickly as the smile appeared, it just as quickly disppeared, and her face darkened as her thoughts resounded in her head. 'Used to, not anymore.' She closed her eyes as she leaned against the her bed and exhaled deeply. The pills were beginning to take effect, and she felt herself calming down. The side effects were also starting to take effect. She started to feel weaker, so she mustered the energy she had left and crawled into her bed. As she pulled the covers over herself, she started to fall into a blissful, dreamless sleep.
She slept well through the day, and into the night. When her cell phone, in her jacket on the floor began to ring, she didn't hear it and missed the call. A very important call. From a very important person.
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Syaoran and Meilin had driven back to their headquarters without conversation. The silence was piercing, but only one person was in a bad mood. Meilin on the other hand had a kind of goofy grin, that looked more like a smirk. When they had stepped into the car, she opened her mouth, but he immediately cut her off before she could say anything.
"Not a word. Don't you dare say a word" he hissed through gritted teeth
Meilin just looked straight ahead with the same goofy smirk on her face. Now the Wolves were sitting around the living room confused as they didn't know what happened. As soon as their leader had arrived he had stomped off to his office without a word to anyone, and had slammed and locked the door. Immediately all eyes fell on Meilin, but she just walked over to the couch were Adam was sitting and sat down dramatically on his lap. With a great deal of show, she flipped her hair casually and turned to Adam.
"Is there anything to eat? I'm hungry." she whined. Adam just raised an eyebrow at her. Something was off. He decided that they wouldn't be getting the little model since they weren't given any instructions since something had obviously gone wrong, wrong enough to get Syaoran mad, and Meilin acting like she was five. He nodded to Meilin's question.
"Yeah, we have some take out on the fidge."
Meilin made a face. "Take out? Again?"
Adam raised and eyebrow and looked at her quizically. "Yeah, well it's not like any of the guys can cook, and believe me, I'd rather go into a full fledged war against Dragons without any weapons before I eat anything that either you or Tomoyo cook." All the guys in the room laughed and nodded their heads as Adam said this, but quickly stopped once Meilin turned and glared at them. She was obviously related to Syaoran, their identical glares was better proof than a DNA sample.
She playfully slapped Adam across the head before getting up and motioning to Tomoyo.
"Hey, let's get something to eat." Tomoyo opened her mouth but then shut it, because Meilin was shooting her a *look*. Tomoyo got up and followed Meilin into the kitchen, while Eriol and Adam exchanged looks. It didn't take a genious to interpret them.
'Something is definately up.'
Meilin rummaged through the fridge looking for food for some time while Tomoyo stood behind her, arms crossed over her chest, with an eyebrow raised. Meilin continued to rummage through the contents in silence, until Tomoyo broke the silence.
"What happened?"
Meilin continued to rummage through the fridge and didn't answer. She sighed and turned around to Tomoyo.
"What did you guys eat? There's like nothing in there." Tomoyo just raised an eyebrow at her and stared.
"We had Italian. There should be some pasta. What happened? It wasn't her, was it?"
Meilin turned around and looked at Tomoyo with a odd expression. "Come on, let's get out of here, I need to talk to you, and I don't think that there's anything that I swallow in there."
She walked out of the kitchen, and again Tomoyo followed with a confused expression. They walked through the living room, and the eyes of many confused onlookers followed. Meilin waited until they were in her car and driving to the nearest Subway before she told Tomoyo the strange events of the afternoon. By the time that she finished, she was parking her car. They had a lot to discuss, so Meilin placed her order quickly and sat down to talk to Tomoyo.
"You found the tracking device on a cat?"
"Yeah."
"So, were you expecting that?"
"I don't know what I was expecting, but not really that. Even though I am a Wolf, I'm kind of glad of what happened."
Tomoyo looked at her. "Why?"
"Because." was the only explanation that she gave, but it wasn't what Tomoyo wanted, nor was it was she would settle for.
"Of?"
She was silent for a moment, and looked down at the table as if in shame, but when she looked up, there was a mischievious glint in her eyes.
"Because it looks like Syaoran has found his match."
"Touya seems more than enough to match him."
"That's not what I meant."
"Well, what did you mean?"
"Well, okay, that is kind of what I meant, but think about it, she could be his perfect match"
Tomoyo understood what she had meant the first time around, but she didn't want to admit it. She didn't want to think that what she had been thinking about had indeed been what her friend had also been thinking.
"It won't work." she said bluntly.
"Tomoyo!" Meilin looked at her in indignation. "I thought that you of all people, would understand what I'm talking about, and I thought that you were like me, thinking that anything would be possible."
"It won't work and you know it. We may like her, but it will never work out with Syaoran. They're both strong forces and one must heed the other. I've never seen Syaoran heed anybody, and if she would bend down to him, then she's not the one."
Meilin looked at her in confusion. "What you're saying is a paradox, you're aware of that right?"
Tomoyo looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Using big words today Meilin? I didn't know that was even in your vocabulary. And what I say makes perfect sense."
Meilin order was done so she stood up to get it. Over her shoulder she called, "Whatever you say, but just you wait, whatever that happens, we will still witness something very entertaining."
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The living room had cleared at last, and now it was only Adam and Eriol sitting on the couches. They had no idea where their girlfriends were, but for once it was the last thing on their minds. They were waiting for Syaoran to emerge from his room, which they both knew that he would. He had to get food sometime they figured. Sure enough, it wasn't long before he came out, and tried to walk into the kitchen as silently as possible for him, but he never was all that quiet.
"So, " Eriol asked as the walked in, finding him rummaging through the fridge. "What happened?"
He turned around slowly. "If I tell you, will you tell whether or not there is anything edible in the fridge?"
Adam stared at him. "Okay?"
"Well,..." he poured out the story, his eyes not meeting theirs, and his voice a monotone.
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Sakura woke up with a odd feeling. She didn't want to get out of bed, but as she looked at her alram clock, she knew that she must. She got out of bed groggily and intended to take a shower when she found herself instead walking into the kitchen. She walked over to her counter and picked up a mid-sized knife and held it above her wrist in a semi-trance. Part of her didn't know what she was doing, but part of her welcomed death. She looked at the knife postioned over her wrist without really seeing it. As she was about to bring the knife down onto her wrist, the phone rang, startling her out of her semi-trance. She turned at stared at the knife again, but this time with complete inderstanding, and she dropped the knife on the counter in disgust. She didn't know what was worse, her condition before she took her medication, or the side-effects of it.
Suicide.
It had always been close behind her, never letting her go, and she never let the thought of suicide linger far away in her thoughts. The reason wasn't the pills, but they were a perfect cover. She couldn't even count the number of times that she had tried to commit suicide, but somehow, she could never achieve it. It was practically a miracle the last time that she survived. She had lost so much blood, there wasn't even enough keep a small baby alive, yet she had pulled through. It was as though in that last instant, her body, or her mind wanted to keep her alive.
Touya always knew that the pills weren't the reason that she always comitted suicide. It began even before she needed the pills for anything, the first time was when she was only ten. Touya was the only force that kept Sakura alive all through the years. Even all the times that she had wanted to let go, he was there. He was always the one that rescued her, found her saved her. Now that she no longer had Touya, she didn't know what she was going to do.
The phone was still ringing, and the noise was starting to hurt her head, so she went to pick it up.
"Hello?"
There was silence on the other line, yet she didn't think that it was her brother. Her never called during the day. It was probably just another obsessive fan. She was about to hang up when she heard the other person speak. As she heard the words her blood chilled. Two words. Two simple words, but it brought her world crumbling down.
"Remember me?"
Of course she remembered. She would never forget his voice, she would never forget him. She threw her phone against the wall where it shattered. She slid down to the floor sobbing. She couldn't believe it. She didn't want to believe it. He was back to haunt her. Him.
She couldn't stop her tears. After everything she had been through, it was ironic that this would be the thing that that pushed her to her limit. The thing that pushed her over the edge. The tears didn't stop for an hour. They may have continued for much longer, but she had to go to a fitting for a show next month. After that she needed to meet with her agent and her stylist. She had a busy day ahead of her. She couldn't waste her time on these thoughts that would ultimately lead to her downfall. She wouldn't let it.
She got up off the floor, and brushed herself off. After she got dressed, she called a limo. In her state she didn't think that it was wise for her to crive herself. She may he headstrong and stubborn, but she wasn't stupid. As she settled herself in the plush upholstery of the limo, she closed herself and let herself fall into a state of thoughtlessness. She needed to immerse herself in her busy life, and not think about how out control it was.
A/N : Please review and tell me what you think of this chapter. If you think it's lame, please post it. I don't think it's that great, and it's pretty short, but I thought it was better to post something. Anyway, thank you all!