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Chapter 10

Brick Wall

The next morning started off as a pretty normal morning. I got ready for school and met Garrett at the corner. But some people kept looking at me real funny. I thought I had like a kick me sign on my back or something. Garrett had done that to me once. I went the whole day with the stupid thing on my back and people starring at me. I was oblivious too it till Jeff pointed it out. I kicked Garrett's ass later but he still thought he was all that for pulling one over on me.

But this one group of girls were starring at me from across the street. They kept looking over at me then whispering to the girl beside them. I honestly hate that. If they have something to say I'd rather they said it to my face.

"What's up with them?" I asked Garrett as he looked over at the girls.

"Dunno," he said, "Probably jealous that you're over here with me and not them."

I laughed and rolled my eyes. Garrett was beginning to think rather highly of himself. Too much time around Lee I figured.

"That must be it," I said shaking my head slightly, "But seriously, no new rumors about me or something?"

"Not that I've heard of."

I nodded my head. If Garrett hadn't heard about it yet then obviously it wasn't that important.

Once I got to school things were pretty normal. I was looking for Ponyboy but turns out he was sick or something. I found that kind of weird considering I had just seen him last night and he looked fine. Then again he always looks real fine I thought to myself with a grin. But I didn't really give it any more thought. I figured I'd stop by his house after school to see how he was doing.

By the time lunch came around I had completely forgotten about the odd stares people had been giving me this morning. It seemed like a normal day. James had gotten out of the reformatory early for good behavior. And he had taken back his usual spot. He kept kicking my seat, which resulted in me going to the principal's office for spazzing out on him. But this was really quite typical.

At lunch Scott, Jeff and I went for something to eat. Garrett didn't come because he had to go home. Turns out Garrett's other little sister Tiffany lost her math homework or something so Garrett was going home to help her. At times Garrett could be a real sweetheart like that. He has like five sisters and he's the only guy except for his dad and he works a lot. Garrett loves his sisters so much; he would drop anything for them in a heartbeat.

Any ways Scott and I were busy having one of our stupid arguments. Scott and I would just start arguing about the dumbest things like one time we had a long, detailed discussion about ice cream. Jeff had decided just to turn up the music as too drown out our bickering. By the time we had gotten back to school Scott and I had already moved onto another topic. Though we didn't even notice we were at school till we saw Jeff hop out and head inside. We both laughed and followed.

And as we were walking by people would just stop what they were doing and stare at me. And it wasn't like one or two people, everyone was. I made Scott check my back for any signs of a note attached to me. But he assured me there was none. Though for the rest of the day people just kept starring me like that. It was really starting to creep me out.

I was real relieved once school ended. I was still so confused as to why everyone was looking at me so funny. I was trying real hard just to shrug it off. I was use to some weird looks. But after all I did have a 'rep' around here. I had gotten use to it. But today was just to weird. It was different from the usual 'you're a slut' kind of stares. It's like I was some amazing rare species that needed to be analyzed. Like there was something wrong with me.

I walked over to Ponyboy's house pretty fast. I knew Ponyboy would hear me out and try to help me figure out what was going on. Plus I missed him. I know it sounds cheesy but it's true. I had never liked a guy like this before.

I knocked on the Curtis's house but there was no answer.

"Hello. Anyone home?" I called out.

I heard someone mumble something and so I stood there waiting at the door.

I was expecting it to be Ponyboy, but it wasn't. It was Dally.

"Whadda ya want Kate?" he asked as he rubbed his eyes.

Dally didn't have his shirt on and it looked as though he had been sleeping. I also noticed he had a good old fat lip so I figured he had gotten into a fight. He probably had come over here to sleep it off.

"Oh hey Dally. Is Ponyboy home?" I asked.

Dally shook his head and I raised an eyebrow.

"He's not? I thought he was sick," I said figuring Dally was just trying to bug me or something.

"I dunno. All I know is he ain't here."

"You sure?"

"Yeah I'm sure. I don't got stupid written across my forehead do I? Geeze girl he's probably out with Mark or something. So would you just go find him already and piss off."

I felt like punching Dally but I didn't. By the looks of it someone how already taken care of that for me. So instead I just settled with smiling sweetly at him, then giving him the finger before I left.

I was trying to think where Ponyboy might be. I headed over to the lot but he wasn't there. Johnny and Two-Bit were though.

"Hey Kate!" Two-Bit hollered at me.

"Yeah?" I hollered back.

"Have you seen Dal any where?" Johnny asked.

"Yeah he's over at the Curtis's."

"Is he alright?" Two-Bit asked.

"He seems fine. The usual cocky, arrogant Dallas Winston. He had a few bruises and a fat lip. But he's fine. Why? Who'd he fight with?"

"Oh he got into a fight with one Sheppard's gang."

I nodded my head, "He looks fine."

"Well we might as well go see him anyways," Two-Bit told Johnny, "Later Kate."

"Hey wait a second," They stopped, "You two seen Pony around?"

"Ummm… yeah. Down at Dingo's with Mark." Johnny answered, though he sounded kind of nervous. Like he shouldn't be telling me this.

"Thanks. See you around."

I decided I might as well go see if Ponyboy was actually there. So I was walking when I saw Lee and Danielle drive by so they stopped and gave me a lift.

"Where you headed off to Kate?" Lee asked with a smile.

I could tell by the shade of Lee's lips that Danielle and him had been having some fun to say the least. I was pretty use to walking in or seeing them making out. I honestly didn't care. If they were happy then I could deal with it. Besides Lee had walked in a few times when me and Ponyboy were kissing. But it was something you got use too.

"Just over to Dingo's," I answered.

"Well here ya are," Lee said with a smile as he pulled over, "Danielle and I have somewhere we gotta be. But do you want me to pick you up in like an hour?"

"I'll be fine. Thanks though," I said as I hopped out of the car.

"Bye Kate," Danielle said. I waved good-bye.

As I headed inside I heard some guy call me a slut. I didn't really pay much attention to it. I was use to that. I've been called a lot of names before. Slut wasn't the worst. I gave the guy an evil glare but that was about it. I walked by this other chick that called me a bitch. I replied with the classic, 'Look who's talking' line. I was really pretty use to this stuff. But I guess I found it kind of weird. Lately no one had said anything like that to me. Most guys typically won't call you a slut if they know your boyfriend will kick their ass.

Some people were still looking at me in that funny way though. I was down right creeped out. I let out a sigh of relief as I saw Ponyboy at one of the booths with his friend Mark. I walked over to where they were sitting. Usually right about now is when Ponyboy would say hey and give me a kiss. But this time he didn't. I wasn't sure how to react. He saw me and said hello but that was it. His friend Mark was glaring at me. I felt like asking him what the hell his problem was. But I didn't. I'd never really liked the guy anyways. I looked over at Ponyboy had this really odd look in his eyes. Kind of a sad one I guess. But for some reason he wouldn't look me directly in the eyes.

"Hey Pony," I said not sure whether to sit down with him or not, "Feeling any better?"

"What? Oh yeah. Umm… I guess."

"Yeah I went over to your place but you weren't there."

"Oh really? Sorry."

"Nah. It's fine. I found ya right?" I said with a smile.

"Yeah right," he said with kind of a forced smile.

It was a really awkward just standing there. But Ponyboy definitely didn't seem like himself. He was real distant. I saw Mark kind of kick Pony almost egging him on. Finally after a minute Ponyboy looked up at me. My eyes met his and he looked really hurt. I wasn't sure what to do.

"Listen Kate," he said standing up, "Can we talk?"

Oh great I thought to myself. How's a girl suppose to react to something like that?

"Ummm… yeah I guess."

Ponyboy nodded his head and headed outside. I followed. My heart began to beat a bit faster. I saw people starring at the two of us. It almost seemed like they knew what was about to happen. But I was really confused. What was going on?

After a minute Pony had found a spot away from most of the crowd. We were as alone as we could be at Dingo's. Ponyboy just kind of stood there for a minute or two without talking. He had his hands in his pockets and he was looking down at the ground.

"What is it Pony?" I asked. Though I wasn't too sure I wanted to know the answer.

"Listen well… its kind of hard to say."

I nodded my head. I could feel my heart beating faster and faster. I didn't know what to expect.

"Why did you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Come on Kate don't play dumb. Mark and his friend saw you."

"Saw me what?" I was honestly really confused.

"Kate come on," he said looking down at his feet again.

"I'm seriously really confused Pony I-"

"Why did you cheat on me?" his voice was kind of raised.

I stood there for a second in absolute shock. That's why everyone was looking at me so funny! They thought I had cheated on Ponyboy. Who the hell would start a rumor like that? Who ever it was I was gonna kick their ass.

"I swear Ponyboy I didn't cheat on you. I-"

He cut me off, "Don't lie Kate. Mark and his friend Bryon saw you with Curly Sheppard. Okay! So don't try to act like it didn't happen. I just wanted to know…why?"

I knew there was a reason why I hated that Mark kid so much.

"Come on Pony. You can't seriously believe that. First off I would never, ever cheat on you okay. I'm not like that. And secondly let's give me a little more credit then frickin' Curly Sheppard."

Then it was silent.

I was half expecting Ponyboy to believe me. For him to laugh and say he was totally over reacting. That he was wrong and he knew I would never do something like that. That he would take me into his arms and hold me, for him to kiss with his soft lips. And to enjoy that feeling I got around him. He honestly made me feel things no guy ever had before.

"All I wanted was the truth Kate. Geeze if you had a thing for Sheppard you could have at least broken up with me first-"

"I don't have a thing for Curly Sheppard! But I do have a thing for Ponyboy Curtis!"

Again there was silence. I wasn't sure what to be saying. I looked into his eyes and saw he was really hurting. Hell I was really hurting. All I wanted was for him to just hold me. To believe me.

"Maybe you should have thought about that before you went messing around with Curly."

I felt like someone had just stabbed me. It really hurt that bad.

"I like you Ponyboy! Not Curly! I didn't do anything with him. You have to believe me."

"I don't have to do nothing."

And just like that it was over. He turned and started walking away. And this time there was no smile on my face as I watched him go.

I felt hot tears sting my face as I stood there. Not knowing what to do. Sure, I've been dumped before. Who hasn't? Hell guys I've never even dated before have dumped me. How come this time it hurt so badly? How come Ponyboy Curtis could make me so happy? Made me feel these wonderful things that I've never felt before. And how come he could break my heart? Make me feel pain I've never felt before. Pain I didn't want to feel.

Then it hit me. Like running into a brick wall. Though I'm pretty sure running into a brick wall would have hurt a lot less.

I love him. I'm in love with Ponyboy Curtis.

But Ponyboy and everyone else were convinced I was some slut who had just played him. Just another chick that's goes around to get a guy to fall for her, get what she wants, then cheat on him, and dump him. That's what Ponyboy thought. And I hated it. I loved him. Why didn't he believe me? Why couldn't he? Hell maybe he doesn't want too.

And no matter how much I wanted him. How badly I just needed him to hold me in his arms. How desperately I wanted to kiss him, to be with him.

He was gone. And he wasn't coming back.

And there I was left. Standing there. Alone.

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