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Chapter Four
Brenda
The next day, when I walked into The Peach Pit, I had the delight of meeting the other kid that helped out. "Damn, baby girl, you is fine."
I stopped and glared at the kid behind the counter. He was cute, slim muscles, pale green eyes, and he was way out of line.
"Kid, I get with you, it's called pedophilia. Hit on me when you're over twenty-one. Then we'll talk."
"Baby girl, I turn eighteen in a year, why not then?" I stopped and stared at him.
"You need two years to mature, at least." Then I went to the back and looked for Emma.
Was this how bad Steve was when we were younger? It was almost comical that Nat employed the schools's goth girl and the boy who most definitely would be offered the legacy key. I was sure this kid gave Steve a run for his money though.
"What's your name?" I asked before I grabbed an oatmeal cookie. I said grabbed and not stole because working here had its perks.
"Quincy."
"I'm Brenda."
"Hmmm Brenda…can I call you Bren baby girl?"
"I don't think were good enough friends yet…but stop with the baby girl and it's a start." Quincy winked at me and went to help a couple in the corner.
I reached into my back pocket to grab my phone. As I was turning my phone back on, I heard him speak. I hated the way my body vibrated with need at the sound of his voice. I hated that I reacted to him at all.
"Brenda, can we talk for a minute" Dylan was standing on the other side of the counter. He was wearing a button down and pants again, and he looked divine. How does he do that?
If I was still chewing my cookie, I might have choked.
"We're a little busy," I replied without looking around. I blamed his eyes. Oh, how I could get lost in those brown orbs.
Dylan looked around then raised an eyebrow at me. Shit, when I looked around, the pit was practically empty just a few people eating peacefully.
"Is this man bothering you, Bren?" Quincy attempted to intimidate Dylan. It was cute, like a little puppy standing up to a Rottweiler.
When you get older, you realize you have to do things you don't want to, like making sure you exercise because you need it. Stopping yourself after two glasses of wine after a long night because it isn't socially acceptable to kill a whole bottle, and now I would have to talk to Mr. Polite because I still wasn't sure if what he wrote on the board was about me.
"It's cool, Q. He's not bothering me."
As I headed around the counter, Quincy came up and whispered that if I need help to holler. Wasn't that sweet? I looked at Dylan and saw the most confusing expression as he glared at poor Quincy. Down Rottweiler, he's just a puppy.
After the stare down, Dylan led us to the back booth by the jukebox, making it harder on those who were in the diner to pry into our conversation.
It was one thing to be close to Dylan when it was the first time seeing him again because the shock wouldn't let me react. It was another thing seeing him with her, but now it was just us two, and my fingers itched to touch him.
"After you." Dylan motioned a hand for me to slide into the seat in front of him. His gaze unraveled me. I would not back down, not now at least. Didn't he know any better?
"What's up?" I asked when I sat down. I was trying not to take deep breaths, because Dylan always smelled good and his cologne was my kryptonite—well, after his eyes, his smile, and how good he looked in those clothes. I really should stop ogling Dylan.
"I owe you an apology," Dylan said, and I refrained from saying "Aha, I knew it, you big jerk," but I was a woman, and like most women, I played stupid to milk his apology.
"I don't want things to be awkward between us. Obviously, you're back in town, and I want you to know that there isn't resentment on my part. We will bump into each other. We know the same people, so it's unavoidable. I would like it if things were friendly between us. There's no reason for things to get complicated. Our past, well, that was a long time ago. We were kids back then; it shouldn't affect us today. I would appreciate it if we were on the same page. Kelly would appreciate it as well."
Say what?
This was so not the apology I had hoped for. What about the quote about the distance thing? He wanted us to be on friendly terms? Was he for real? Could he really sit across from me and tell me he didn't hate me a little bit? Did he not care at all?
I stared at him in confusion, and a part of me wondered if this was some sort of joke. But Dylan brought her up. He was talking to me to make sure I behaved because he cared about Kelly, and he didn't want me to hurt her feelings. A tiny whisper echoed in the back of my mind, asking, But what about mine?
"You want to be friends… with me?" I pointed at myself, still going on autopilot.
Dylan gave me a small smile, and I was trying to see through it, but I couldn't.
"Civil. I want to be civil. This town isn't big enough for the both of us to run around without seeing each other. Especially because you're helping out here everyday."
"Are you saying I can't do civil?" I raised my tone, and I hated that he raised his eyebrow, as if saying he had just proved his point.
"That's not what I said."
"You suggested I had to be civil; therefore you expected me to do what exactly?"
"Don't put words in my mouth," he said through gritted teeth, and a part of me perked up. He was angry, right? That had to mean something.
"You're the one who brought it up."
"You know what, forget it. My fiancée and I will keep our distance," he snapped, and I felt a little fragment of my heart break. Ick.
I smiled at him to hide the pain I was feeling. "Like you said, we were just kids, right?"
I watched Dylan get up; he was so different from the boy I remembered, and part of me was fascinated, but also repulsed. His shadow fell on me, and I wondered if I should have gotten up, that way he wouldn't be looking down at me.
"Exactly, nothing special, just a girl I knew in high school," he added.
I flinched.
OUCH
I could feel myself beginning to crack. I couldn't help but open my big fat mouth and ask, "So what you wrote on the chalkboard wasn't about me?"
Dylan stopped before he got to the door. He turned to look back at me, his face blank, and he said, "I have no idea what you're talking about, Have a nice day Brenda."
Then he left.
Never had Dylan lied to me so well. He was a crappy liar, but I couldn't forget this wasn't my Dylan anymore.
My blood might have boiled; still, I didn't ponder it for long, not the fact he lied to me or the fact that we were civil or the fact that that precious moment of my life when I was so hurt so betrayed got reduced to nothing special. That moment after his father died, when he told me the opposite of what he just had said made me feel better. And he just shit on it.
Nothing special my ass. I wanted to demand answers. I was about to go out the door and follow Dylan and not be civil, but Emma chose that moment to walk in.
"Hey, Emma, be right back," I told her without meeting her eyes.
"Wait, Brenda, I want to show you something." I made a sour face Emma couldn't see. She didn't know it yet, but she was stopping me from making a mistake. I should thank her, not be annoyed, but I wasn't very rational, and at the moment, I was trying to go have a word with my 'friend'.
Still, I turned around to my sweet Emma. It wasn't her fault I was a hothead.
"What is it?" I asked. Resigned, I looked at the door one last time. It was too late to follow Dylan anyway.
Emma smiled brightly at me when she handed me the box she had picked up. Quincy, the nosy little rascal he was turning out to be, came behind my shoulder as I opened the box.
"Oh my God!" I shouted.
"Damn, girl, you blew my hearing," Quincy complained.
"You like it?" Emma asked with a smile. Did I like it? Was this girl nuts? All the customers were staring at me like I was crazy. I pulled out the bright teal button down Peach Pit shirt that read Brenda, I held it up to me proudly. I was part of a team now. It felt good.
"So, getting a girl a shirt is all it takes to get that kind of gratitude?"
Emma froze in my arms since we were jumping while we hugged. I turned to see Detective Wes smiling at us.
"Well, it depends on the girl. Some girls want Cartier and Tiffany's. Others like flowers, and some of us want to feel like part of the team. Isn't my boss the best?"
"I'm not your boss. We don't even pay you," Emma grumbled.
I let her grab Wes's order while I put on my new shirt, Brandon would be so proud.
"Need help with that?" Quincy asked, looking hopeful.
"I don't think so, kid."
"Now I'm officially a member of the team. I got to say, Wes, I'm a little disappointed you're barely having your first cup of coffee. Let me guess, the BHPD spends money on the good stuff?"
Wes laughed. "This is my second stop in. I actually tried to beat McKay on the quote of the day." I looked over. "He beat me again."
Friendship may, and often does, grow into love, but love never subsides into friendship. - Lord Byron.
Oh wait a god damn minute. Ok maybe I wasn't as good as Dylan at understanding Byron but that meant something right? He just asked to be 'friendly' and Mr. Byron just said if you love someone it never turns to friendship.
See he is a LIAR. There it was, proof I should have gone after Dylan and demanded answers. That damn chalkboard was like a Magic 8 Ball.
"How bout next time you just erase it and beat him that way." I told Wes.
"Well where is the fun in that?" He had a point. "I asked about you," he said.
Emma was handing him his coffee but froze for a second before softly saying, "You did?"
At the same time, I said, "Why?"
It was one thing for hot guy Wes to ask around about me; it was a whole different story for Detective Wes to ask about me. Not that I had any skeletons in my closet, at least not anymore, it was just one of those things where you got a little iffy about a cop snooping in your business. I couldn't be the only one, right?
Wes looked a little sheepish as he brought his hand to his neck and said, "I was making sure you weren't a danger."
"Me?" I pointed at myself. "A danger? What did you find out about me? Better yet, who did you ask? Because let me say, if you asked certain people that hate me. Who knows what they said."
Wes smiled brightly, "Record was clean…except." Oh shit. "Really breaking into a science lab? I mean…I thought you were cooler than that?"
"HEY! Excuse me I was saving innocent animals. Plus how did you know that, those charges were dropped against me?"
"You spend the night in jail…there is a record of it."
"Well shit." I slumped over.
"Interesting fact…there also was a signature on who bailed you out."
I stared at him not amused only for him to give me the biggest smile. Fuck he was cute. I huffed, "Well…detective Wes…that is my cue. Good day sir."
I heard them all laughing when I went into the back. I tossed my back dramatically against the wall. Friends…like when he bailed me out of jail. Friends. Well not friends really, Dylan wanted to be civil? For Kelly's sake.
Fuck you Dylan…you selfish asshole.
After my shift, David picked me up. Tonight was my dreaded dinner with him and Donna. I sat quietly staring out the window thinking about me and Dylan's talk.
"What's wrong, Bren? No need to be nervous."
Oh, my quietness wasn't nerviness. Fury maybe, but not nerves. I bit my lip to stop myself from saying something mean about his sister and fuck head.
"Long day I guess."
"Relax, it will be great," David said as he rubbed my back. Easy for him to say.
"When's the baby due?"
"6 weeks."
I sighed a happy sigh, "You're gonna be a dad David. I still can't believe you and Donna are having a baby. I can't even believe Donna had sex!"
David laughed out loud, "Tell me about it."
We laugh for a full minute, "Oh she does though…can't get enough of me." David jokes.
"Dude, TMI," I said as I braved it and passed the threshold on their beautiful, cozy home.
Donna had good taste, but that wasn't what made their home feel cozy and homey.
Sure, it's nicely decorated, but that wasn't what made their home look loved. It was the personal touches, the random knickknacks that made two individuals become one. It made me think of the cushy loft Ashton and I shared. We had nice things, a lot of expensive things, but it always felt so… cold. Come to think of it, we never spent too much time at home relaxing and watching movies. Must have been hard chilling at home with your girlfriend when you fucked half of London on the couch. I was his show-and-tell girl to parade around town. How did I not notice things between Ashton and me change? How could I have been blind to it all? I wished I had seen it sooner. There was no excuse for how stupid I had been.
I had been loved once, I knew what it felt like to be truly loved, worshipped and wanted, treated like a queen, and I stayed blind to all of it.
When I heard Donna's voice, I put on a brave face and hoped David was right that I should relax and it would be great. Donna hadn't really done anything to me. It wasn't like we had a major falling out. Just it hurt to not be included in her special day but if I was being honest, we had lost touch years before the wedding. The truth was, after I left Dylan, it was hard to keep in touch with the gang, it was hard to be reminded of what I had left behind.
"Brenda, you made it." Donna smiled at me as she joined us in the living room. "I wasn't sure you would come when David explained how upset you were about the wedding."
She seemed almost embarrassed, and it made me feel bad. It's was hard to stay mad at Donna, it was much easier to give David shit. I wasn't going to lie and say it was fine from there on, because there was too much history between the three of us to make us forget everything, but we were adults, so I tried to have a nice evening.
At first, dinner was somewhat uncomfortable, despite the food being amazing. Just a lot of awkward silence.
"Do you guys know what you're having?" I asked. As icebreakers went, this was a good option. When Donna smiled and turned to look at David, I could see how much she loved him. At that moment, it was like every part of her was so attuned to him it shined through.
"A girl." She beamed.
"God, she will be the cutest little thing ever," I said with raw honesty. "Do you have ultrasound pictures?"
Donna did me one better; she not only brought me ultrasound pictures, but she busted out their wedding album. My hands shook as I grabbed the big white book.
"I'm going to check something in the garage. Be right back," David said.
Both Donna and I knew it was just an excuse for him to leave us alone. I sat the book down and looked at it with a little sadness. I would never see my once best friends get married, and that made my chest ache.
"I missed you," Donna said. "David missed you too. On our wedding day, he still looked for you despite not inviting you."
"Why didn't you guys invite me?" The answer scared me, but I needed it.
"Open the book, Brenda," was her reply.
With shaky hands, I turned over the cover page, and my eyes watered with every page turned. Donna looked stunning; even through the pictures, I could see that it was the happiest day of her life. When I got to the bridal party photos, I was surprised to see Dylan in them. Dylan was David's best man. God, he looked so handsome, so put together, smiling and sharing in what was the happiest day of their lives to date.
Kelly and Dylan were standing by the happy couple. A tear slid down my face. She was the maid of honor. I was quiet as I stared down at the photo.
"We had a decision to make. We both wanted you there, but Dylan had just gotten to a good place in his life—well, having you back would have jeopardized it."
"What do you mean Dylan had just gotten to a good place?" I was shaking a bit as I asked. "He was unrecognizable when he came back to LA. He got arrested for possession, hospitalized, he was doing heroine, he was so high he almost killed me, when I tried to help him and he pulled away, I lost my footing and fell straight in the pool, I hit my head on the edge. I was out cold. His playboy ways reached new heights. When he returned, he told us he broke up with you, but we all knew better. He was too bitter, too cold when your name was brought up. We didn't know what had happened, but we knew it was something. He acted the exact same way when you didn't come home after your summer at RADA, but this time was so much worse."
Hearing Donna explain the fruit of my labor made me feel cold inside; it numbed me. I turned Dylan into something he never was. A drug addict? It made me sick to think he used sex to forget about what we shared.
"I didn't know," I whispered.
"Don't get me wrong Bren, it wasn't your doing, Dylan has always had substance issues, but I don't know, something told us if you were there, you would have derailed all his progress. I know not completely fair, but at that time we hadn't talked to you, and Dylan was very much in our everyday life."
"I understand." I quickly wiped an escaped tear.
"Is it hard now that you're back?"
I looked at Donna, there was something sincere in her eyes that made me ask, "When…did they get back together?"
She looked down before making eye contact with me, "After the wedding. They got engaged very shortly after." I nodded.
"It is hard. It sounds like no one really knows exactly what happened in London. Dylan didn't break up with me…I left him."
Donna nods, running her finger around the top of her mug containing tea.
"That makes more sense."
"He said what we shared wasn't anything special, that we were kids back then." There was such heartbreak in that sentence, and I didn't care to look pathetic in front of Donna.
"It will get better, Bren," Donna said as she covered her hand over mine, and I hoped she was right. "I'm glad your back." She gave me a sad smile.
"It seems like everyone is except him and her."
Donna laughed lightly, she squeezes my hand before letting go, "Well I'm sure the return of Brenda in her eyes spells trouble. You know Kel, just the thought of you brings back a lot of insecurities. Kelly's changed a lot. But you definitely bring the old Kelly out. To my understanding, Dylan had to promise commitment, all or nothing for her to even take him back. They seem to get along, better than before, but they're both reserved when it comes to their relationship now. I just want both of them to be happy. That's all anybody wants."
"They look happy." I looked down at the album. Jealousy and pain overwhelming me and I try to act like its not.
"You think?" My head snapped to Donna.
"You don't.." She shrugged.
"Don't get me wrong I love Kelly, she is my sister-in-law now."
"But.." I smile a little and she smiles back.
"But…I don't know. It doesn't feel right. They don't feel right, which if I'm being honest they never really did but there is something that feels like a business transaction with them. I don't know I shouldn't be saying this."
This time I cover my hand over Donna's, "It's all good." I nod, knowing she doesn't want to say anything disrespectful, that was the way Donna was. "This conversation will only be between us. Believe me the last thing I want anyone to know…especially those two is how even their existence affects me like this."
Donna chuckles with a nod, "Hate to break it to you Bren…it's written all over your face."
I puff out the air in a disappointed sigh.
"I'll be back. I have dessert."
When she gets up, I do as well. "Donna?" She turns and in one second flat my arms are around her. I hug her as close as her pregnant belly will allow.
"I'm sorry Brenda." She whispers.
"Me too." I whisper back. "Congratulations….on marrying David…on the baby. I'm so happy for you." I squeeze her before releasing her.
She looks at me, her eyes as teary as mine, "Thank you."
I sit when she smiles at me and waddles a little to the kitchen. I take a deep breath, somehow the conversation calmed me.
I enjoyed the rest of the evening with Donna and David. They brought out old videos from high school, David had transferred to DVD. We laughed and caught up. By the end of the night my conversation with Dylan hadn't bothered me as much as it did before. I was stupid to put Donna in the same category as Kelly. We may have lost touch but Donna was still Donna. And I owed David a butt load of gratitude for bringing me here. He was right, it would all be fine.
Mornings were not the time to be making wise decisions. I was groggy but feeling brave because things went so well with Donna, and I figured, if I could deal with all the stuff I had been dealing with here, it would be a piece of cake to deal with Ashton.
When the phone rang and I saw it was a call from London, I didn't ignore it like I usually did. "What do you want, asshole? It's been days of me pressing ignore and not returning your texts. Most people would take the hint."
Just because I answered it didn't mean I had to be polite; he didn't deserve it.
"I had hoped that you would've cooled off by now, Brenda." Ashton was trying to make me feel childish, but it would not work. I wouldn't succumb to feeling like this was my fault.
"And I had hoped you would have stopped annoying me by now, but hey, we don't always get what we want," I snapped back, regretting my decision in answering his phone call.
"Brenda, I think it's time you came home, preferably by Thursday. But as long as you're here before Friday, you'll have time to get ready for the gala on Saturday. I'll have my driver pick you up from the airport—"
Removing the phone from my ear, I looked at it with disbelief then pressed the end button. What world was that moron living in? Did my leaving, the little fit I threw in the garage, and the absence of all my things mean anything to him?
Ashton: Stop being childish, Brenda, and come home.
Me: Fuck off.
Aston: I have been more than patient with you. All the things I've gotten you through the years. Let's not forget, I could have pressed charges, but I haven't.
I flung off my bedcovers, put on my slippers, and went outside. Nat wasn't there; he told me last night he was going into the Pit early for a big produce delivery. This was a plus and a con for me. Nat could have talked me out of what I was about to do.
A few days ago I had bought a shed. More packages had arrived from London, including a fucking bike. My storage unit was filled to the brim. So after talking to Nat he had the idea to get a portable shed that he would allow me to have on his property to keep the rest of my stuff until I figured out what the hell I was going to do with my life.
I went back to my shed where all the boxes where perfectly stashed. It didn't take me long to find what I was looking for, thankfully I knew it was in this shipment and not the last that was collecting dust on Beverly Glen in my storage unit.
Lucky for me the company Victor had did an excellent job of packing my stuff. I sent a message to Emma, letting her know I would not make it to work.
I couldn't believe Ashton threw in my face the stuff he bought me. Not only was it tacky, but it made him more of a dick. When I finished collecting, I laughed hysterically.
In front of me in a pile were five dresses, three pairs of shoes, and two little boxes containing earrings. I wasn't trying to be a bitch, but we were together for decent amount of time, and that's all he ever gave me when I had a shed and storage unit dedicated to clothes that I bought for myself, and the stupid bastard tried to make it seem like he owned me.
Grabbing the dresses and the shoes, I picked them up, went to the far end of the yard and threw the dresses and the shoes on the ground before going back into the house to grab lighter fluid and matches. Then I set it on fire. I really shouldn't have answered my fucking phone.
It was childish of me to snap a picture and send it Ashton, but I didn't care.
Me: There's all the stuff you gave me. Now it's gone, and so are you. Don't bother me again.
As I watched the flames burn, I finally felt like I got rid of Ashton, the fire burning our time together away. That was until I saw cop lights right in front of me. Squinting, I smiled when I saw it was Wes driving.
"Hey, Wes, if I knew you were coming, I would have told you to bring stuff to make s'mores." Wes didn't smile back at me. Instead, he stared at the pieces of fabric that had yet to burn and the shoes, which hadn't entirely melted, and then again at me.
"What are you doing, Brenda?"
"I'm burning the clothes that my ex-boyfriend tried to throw in my face that he bought me," I said it like it was an everyday thing for me.
Wes sighed, put his hand on his hip, and said, "I wished you would have found another way to purge."
"Why?"
"Because it violates the rules set by Nat's landlord, and don't play coy Brenda, this is LA it's always fire season in the hills. The canyon is dry as shit."
I swear I didn't mean to laugh, but Wes had to be joking with me.
"Nat owns this property. I doubt he called the cops on me. Besides, he isn't even here. Plus I wouldn't have let the fire get out of control…there is extinguisher right there." I pointed to the one I had brought out.
Wes shifted a little before looking over to where you could barely make out the other homes on the street. Nat liked his space, so when he bought his land and property in the 70's, he picked somewhere pretty secluded in the hills.
"Nat sold it while ago. The person who bought the property also owns all the five acres surrounding him. I came up here not because of the fire, but because someone made a complaint about the shed you put on property that isn't yours."
"You're serious, aren't you? It was Nat's idea for me to get the shed."
Wes gave me a tight-lipped smile.
"You're taking me to the station?"
"I'm afraid so. I'll call the landlord when we get there, better to talk in person."
Eye roll. In person my ass. I was so mad that I didn't bother to change. I told Wes just to go. He was kind enough to let me ride shotgun.
"What happened between you and Dylan, if you don't mind me asking?" Wes asked, and for once I didn't mind that question. Wes had that detective personality, he asked a lot of questions but he definitely must have played the good cop in interrogations because I felt at ease talking to him.
"We lived together for three years in London, but we started dating in high school. Things didn't end well for us our senior year, but when he came to London, Dylan was a different person than he was then. We made a home together, we were each others home. I left him at the end of October in 1998."
"Why?"
I looked over at Wes with a smirk, "He doesn't even know the real reason I left, it wouldn't be right telling you when he doesn't know."
"Fair enough." He nods as he looks at the road ahead of him.
"Why do you ask?" He lifts one shoulder.
"I've known McKay for a few years. He's come along way. Wasn't always Mr. clean cut, good citizen, writing Byron on the chalkboard at the pit but I can tell you affect him."
I rolled my eyes, yeah right. "If you knew Dylan as well as me you'd know that writing Bryon on the chalkboard is more him then you think." I decided to change the subject, "How about you? How did you end up in Beverly Hills?"
"My dad, he's from here. He moved back a few years ago. I came to visit, liked the town, and transferred."
"You liked the town, huh? Nothing to do with a certain waitress at the Peach Pit?" I teased. "Did she say something?" he prodded. Whoever said guys weren't into gossip lied.
"I haven't asked but only because I don't want to talk about Dylan. Can I give you some advice?"
A slight nod was all he gave me as confirmation. "I can tell Emma likes you, but maybe don't come on too strong. You'll only scare her away more. She's shy, just give it time."
By the time we got to the station, I had time to process what was happening. Nat sold his house? I didn't know he was having problems? Then again it wasn't like I was around either. I wish he would have called me, I would have helped him in a second. I'm sure I wasn't the only one out of the gang that wouldn't have minded helping Nat out either.
Getting out of the car, I followed Wes to his office and sat on his desk while he called the landlords. So many surprises these days.
Since I didn't bring my phone, I figured Wes wouldn't mind if I borrowed the one in his office. I didn't know many numbers by memory, but I knew the Peach Pit number by heart from when I used to call Brandon.
"Peach Pit. How may I help you?" Emma's voice was hesitant. I couldn't blame her. I would be hesitant too if the caller ID said police.
"Hey, it's me."
"Brenda, what are you doing at the police station? Is this why you couldn't come to work? Do you need me to bail you out?"
"What? No! I'm just waiting for Nat's landlord to show, I forgot my cell. I probably don't have a lot of time, so can you tell me who it is? I don't want to be surprised, because I'm tired of all these surprises; none of them are good. Like, why can't someone come up and be like 'Brenda Walsh, you've won a new car?' Or 'hey, Brenda, you're back, so we baked you a cake."
Emma didn't have time to answer me because I heard Wes coming back. "Too late. I got to go—wait—might call you about that bail. I forgot my wallet, bye."
I hung up the phone just as Wes walked in with Dylan.
You have got to be shitting me.
"Did you just use my phone to make a call?" Wes asked me, but I ignored him.
"Seriously, Dylan!" I went off on him. "What happened to the whole 'let's be friends, Brenda?' and you go and call the cops on me? That isn't very friendly. Back when we were children". Yes I emphasized children, "We had each others backs. I was always there for you and if I needed you, you were always there for me too." I jumped off the desk, and that's when I noticed I was still in my pajamas that said, "I'd rather be naked."
"That's a serious dick move, Dylan." I went to hit him, or maybe I was just going to touch him, but Dylan caught my arm mid-stride. His hand wrapped around my wrist, and when I looked at him, I took a step back.
There was something in his gaze that gave me chills, and no not like Freddy Krueger chills, more like I kinda want to hump you chills. This was bad. But then his face morphed again to the same kind expression he had whenever he talked to me.
Seriously, would it kill him to be a D-bag?
"I'm sorry, Brenda. I didn't call you here. It was Kelly who made the report." He sounded almost sorry.
"Why would she care?"
"I bought the house and the land surrounding it a while ago, Nat was having trouble with the Pit and making ends meet. Kelly wants to build a house up there."
His soft-spoken words shook me to my core.
"Oh."
The words were physically painful to get out. Dylan was really over me, wasn't he? He would marry Kelly and build their home close to Nat. That's why he was so nice to me, why it wasn't an effort for him to be a gentleman with me because I didn't matter. He wasn't angry about what I did because he was over me. He was over me and I… I wasn't over him.
How many years did I spend running from what I felt, telling myself the exact same thing he said to me? We were kids who didn't know better. But I wasn't a kid anymore, and I knew deep in my bones I had never stopped loving him. I might have left this him three years ago, but my heart stayed with him.
"I'll pay for whatever damages. Just tell me how much, and I'll write you a check," I whispered. I couldn't look at him because I still cared, and I didn't want him to see how much he was hurting me. When I pulled my hand from his grasp, he let me go without hesitation.
"That's not necessary. I don't need your money."
It was the wrong thing to say to me at the moment. I was too raw, too exposed. I was feeling too much.
"Don't worry, I'm more than good for it. I don't want your fiancée saying you had to take pity on the failed actress." I couldn't look up at him. I didn't want to see what was behind those intense brown eyes I used to love so much.
Instead, I ran out. I ran because I was good at it. I was so good at trying to outrun my past, it was comfortable living in limbo.
Good things fall apart, so better things could come together. Well, what happened when the best thing you ever had fell apart? What came after that? Because I wanted to believe that I had something waiting for me, there had to be more for me than being the girl who is always betrayed.
"Brenda," I heard Dylan call out, but I didn't stop. I didn't want him to see me, not when all those broken pieces of me were out in the open. Not when a wound I thought had healed was bleeding, and his name wanted to leave my lips like a prayer. Some things were better off unsaid, and I had learned that lesson the hard way.
Dylan McKay was the love of my life, but I was not the love of his life. Coming home was the biggest mistake I had ever made, because at least in London I was okay. Ashton cheated on me, but he never got close enough to break me because I never gave him all of me because all my pieces were broken, and I had never bothered to put them back together.
So as you can see things are just continuing to to build up and up with these two...the confrontation as some of you are calling is coming, but all in good time. Ok Chapter 5 and 6 are written. If I get the amount of reviews I've been getting I'll post tomorrow am. KISSES.